Post: #26

I'd love to give the 18yo Phoenix a list of things I know now, and say "here buddy, it's OK, do this and you'll be fine". If he'd known what I do now he'd probably have been really successful, instead of just suffering.

There's a huge amount of wisdom I'd give him (he was completely clueless), but the foundation ones are:
- If you have thoroughly researched what's best for you, and you have solid reasons and evidence, you're right. Other people are not right by virtue of age or biological relation, you should never follow advice on those grounds only, and you should always search for the wisest men for your advice.
- It isn't wrong to tell people to fuck off if they aren't a benefit to your life, regardless of who they are.
- Be socially engaged. There is no 'set course', through your studies or anything else. You must hustle socially, you must find and talk to people who are winning. You must engage in a variety of activities and social arenas.
- Leave home as young as possible, but move in with winners, not losers. The people you know and spend time with are a catalyst on your life, in both directions.
- The primary limiter on your quality of life will be your weight and musculature. Fix it now, whatever it takes.

Post: #27

"Money matters only as much as the free time it releases to you."

This is so true. As I approach 31, I am at a crossroads as to how to—not if—quit my corporate job. Friends who earn way more than me hate their jobs, the long hours and pathetic life/work balance. What is the use of money without time? Specially if you don't plan to have children, pay a mortgage or save for college.

Post: #28

I think the super important thing in life as you approach 30 is to find a mentor. I'm still searching for mine, at least professionally speaking. Older guys who know how the game has played can make a huge difference in your life.

The 'sphere has been somewhat of a mentor for me. I've learned more truth about the world and how to get what I want as a man than I did from any of the men in my life, including my dad who I love to death.

Post: #29

One thing I wish I learned earlier is that a habit of procrastination will eventually catch up with you.

As a bright young man you can get away with it through high school, university, even your first job but as you move up the ladder eventually you will run into a wall if you don't address it.

I used to look down on people with good work habits because I could do the same quality or better work in a last minute crunch. Now I am realizing that it added needless stress to my life and hindered my progress.

To get to the independent lifestyle most of us want to achieve you have to keep yourself honest and save the playtime for after your daily tasks are done.

Post: #30

(08-30-2014 03:32 PM)babelfish669 Wrote:  By the time you are 30, not a single female you thought was hot while you were in high school or college will still be attractive.

This one still blows my mind. I wonder how this will feel. I see a lot of hot chicks from high school on my fb feed and their stock is already plummeting (I'm 24).

Post: #31

(12-13-2014 11:39 PM)oldirtybachelor Wrote:  

(08-30-2014 03:32 PM)babelfish669 Wrote:  By the time you are 30, not a single female you thought was hot while you were in high school or college will still be attractive.

This one still blows my mind. I wonder how this will feel. I see a lot of hot chicks from high school on my fb feed and their stock is already plummeting (I'm 24).

It is always a sad thing to see beauty destroyed.

Post: #32

(12-14-2014 01:29 PM)Glaucon Wrote:  

(12-13-2014 11:39 PM)oldirtybachelor Wrote:  This one still blows my mind. I wonder how this will feel. I see a lot of hot chicks from high school on my fb feed and their stock is already plummeting (I'm 24).

It is always a sad thing to see beauty destroyed.

Agreed. Beauty is the most fragile and fleeting trait that anyone can possess.

Post: #33

(12-09-2014 08:08 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  Other people are not right by virtue of age or biological relation, you should never follow advice on those grounds only, and you should always search for the wisest men for your advice.

Robert Greene has recently published a great article on that topic

https://medium.com/life-learning/the-nai...700d203107

Post: #34

Can some older guys talk more about the work/time balance?

I'm finding more and more that my successful friends are not my rich friends...my successful friends are my friends that enjoy life. They laugh often, but they cry sometimes, too. They acknowledge both triumphs and failures. Some days they work long hours, and some days they work short hours.

But ALL of them enjoy every single moment of life. They don't let the ups and downs of life get them down. They just ride the wave. They're not stressing over when their shift ends because they're so focused on making the most of their shift. They're talkative when they are around people because their engaging with their environment. They're living life, rather than obsessing over how little money/free time/whatever. There's no need for more anything because they're content with their experience. Yeah, some of them are multi-millionaires...but some of them are also what people would call "poor".

I will say that they are all physically fit, though. All of the friends I consider successful are in good-health, have lots of meaningful relationships, are intelligent...just good people. So I agree with some of the things that are said here.

But I'm a little confused about this concept of "free-time"...I just don't understand it. Whatever it is that you would do with this ideal work/life balance, why don't you just make that your work? Why not make your leisure activity your source of income?

I'm starting to realize something: success is very relative. What I consider a successful life is not what everyone else considers a successful life. I think the most important thing that anyone can do is make up their own definition of success and strive to achieve it. Define what "life" is to you; then go out there and live it to the fullest.

Post: #35

Still getting positive feedback. Thanks, really hope this helps.

(12-12-2014 03:50 AM)EasyMoney Wrote:  I think the super important thing in life as you approach 30 is to find a mentor. I'm still searching for mine, at least professionally speaking. Older guys who know how the game has played can make a huge difference in your life.

The 'sphere has been somewhat of a mentor for me. I've learned more truth about the world and how to get what I want as a man than I did from any of the men in my life, including my dad who I love to death.

One thing I did early on was read advice from millionaires about their personal lives. It was immediately evident that getting married and giving a woman money to spend was nothing more than a way to get divorced quickly. This also helped put early decisions in perspective by knowing finding your own direction in life was the only way to solve hard problems and ultimately make large amounts of money.

Now most of the friends I actually spend time with are millionaires so I see things in detail.

(12-27-2014 11:20 PM)BasketBounce Wrote:  But I'm a little confused about this concept of "free-time"...I just don't understand it. Whatever it is that you would do with this ideal work/life balance, why don't you just make that your work? Why not make your leisure activity your source of income?

It depends what you are doing. I've seen people have a hobby, start a business around it, and then whatever enjoyment was there from the hobby drains away. Perhaps it was because the work moves from optional to mandatory. May be it was just the expectations of others and the need for quality output transforms in to stress. My best recommendation is to find things that you don't have to work year round at. Starting your own business is not my top recommendation. Some people can make money doing the things they want to do. You are extremely fortunate if you fall in this category and should completely capitalize on it.

Post: #36

- A self-disciplined lifestyle, one where you must face and overcome fears and challenges, is WAY more rewarding than one constantly pursuing hedonistic pleasures.

Post: #37

(12-30-2014 06:49 PM)babelfish669 Wrote:  Still getting positive feedback. Thanks, really hope this helps.

(12-12-2014 03:50 AM)EasyMoney Wrote:  I think the super important thing in life as you approach 30 is to find a mentor. I'm still searching for mine, at least professionally speaking. Older guys who know how the game has played can make a huge difference in your life.

The 'sphere has been somewhat of a mentor for me. I've learned more truth about the world and how to get what I want as a man than I did from any of the men in my life, including my dad who I love to death.

One thing I did early on was read advice from millionaires about their personal lives. It was immediately evident that getting married and giving a woman money to spend was nothing more than a way to get divorced quickly. This also helped put early decisions in perspective by knowing finding your own direction in life was the only way to solve hard problems and ultimately make large amounts of money.

Now most of the friends I actually spend time with are millionaires so I see things in detail.

(12-27-2014 11:20 PM)BasketBounce Wrote:  But I'm a little confused about this concept of "free-time"...I just don't understand it. Whatever it is that you would do with this ideal work/life balance, why don't you just make that your work? Why not make your leisure activity your source of income?

It depends what you are doing. I've seen people have a hobby, start a business around it, and then whatever enjoyment was there from the hobby drains away. Perhaps it was because the work moves from optional to mandatory. May be it was just the expectations of others and the need for quality output transforms in to stress. My best recommendation is to find things that you don't have to work year round at. Starting your own business is not my top recommendation. Some people can make money doing the things they want to do. You are extremely fortunate if you fall in this category and should completely capitalize on it.

If I may ask, where did you come about stuff like this? Biographies and such? I'd definitely appreciate some recommendations if you have any.

Post: #38

Quote:Dressing nice in cheap clothes is counterproductive.

Fit is by far the most important aspect of dress. Shirt seams snugly on shoulder, little to no billow around the belly, pants should never sag or be stepped on.

If you want to sell yourself as alpha fucks without letting any beta bucks creep in, cheap but well-fitting clothes are the way to go.

Post: #39

I would tell myself at 18 all my parent's advice is utterly worthless, and I would be better off getting a telemarketing job.

College was a hell of a lot of fun though. I don't think anyone had as much fun as I did.

Most people are worthless and it's NOT hard to start your own business -- (connections and specialized skills help a lot).

Then I would tell myself I would sleep with some girls I would see in porn while in college, and then get my shit together.

I would tell myself I will probably be a millionaire before 30 because of pure luck and annoying persistence.

Post: #40

Only a few more hours left of 2014 here.

I will be spending it with my brother and some friends. Alcohol free. Today was spent at the gym, getting a hair cut and taking some piano lessons online.


My one and only new years resolution is to keep on improving, and that definitely includes,

reading this thread until I know it by heart.

Post: #41

(09-05-2014 07:44 AM)Isaac Jordan Wrote:  

(09-03-2014 11:42 AM)travolta Wrote:  "Young people should look closely at old people as counter examples of what they do not wish to become."

I like this one, as it's something I think about often. Most old people suck at life. They sucked at life when they were young and when they were middle aged, and they still suck at life now when they're old.

It's amazing how many older people will try to give you advice based solely on the presumption that because they're older they know what's best for you. 95% of the time I think to myself, do I want to end up anything like this person? And the answer is no, I don't.

I wouldn't take financial advice from a pauper, or diet advice from a fatty. [b]If you're not living the kind of life I want to live at your age, you can bet I won't take advice from you, either.[/b]

So true.

Post: #42

Turning 29 in 3 months time.

Here's the biggest lesson I've learned:

Life is too short to do anything you dislike. A lot of people confuse discomfort and dislike. You can do something you like and still allow yourself to get out of your comfort zone because that is needed for growth. But to do something you dislike just for the sake of future security is probably something I will never ever do even if I come to repent this decision later on. From my experience and what I have seen, I find the truly successful people are those who have always had the courage to live a life that came 'easy' to their nature and then worked damn hard at it.

Post: #43

As I approach 30 I have thought of this question multiple times.

I would give my 20 year old self the following advice:

The auto-immune, very low carb paleo diet is the solution for acne, abnormal fatigue and stubborn body fat. This one tip would have changed my life.

Like your dick, your ego is reactive and does not think but unlike your dick your ego is an illusion, dutch the ego to uncover the burden on your authentic self and full potential.

Perceiving my thoughts as an observing separate entity really helps put things into perspective, especially in reactive episodes of distress.

Journal everyday for improved creativity, communication skills and memory recall.

Experiment with high quality shrooms and lsd asap.

Post: #44

My god, where to begin telling my 20 year old self:

-90% of degrees and educational courses are complete horseshit, including Accounting, Engineering, Finance, and Law. These degrees don't actually teach you how to do the job, you can only learn the job...once you're in the job!

-Sex with high volumes of average girls is boring. If you sleep with lots of different girls, you'll want to use condoms, and you can't really feel anything with a condom

-Sure, you can sleep with a hot girl using "pua" Or alcohol. Or whatever. But there's nothing worse than sleeping with a 9 or a 10 and knowing she's thinking about someone else. Eventually, you'll want to become a "10" yourself. You'll want her fantasizing about you when you're apart. You'll feel very cheap and "unjustified" if you're banging a smoking hottie but you both know she could be with a much better looking guy. Get to the gym!

-The only way to be 100% sure you won't get a girl pregnant is to use a condom. No ifs or buts. If you sleep with a girl and she is in charge of birth control, you must accept the inherent risk of a child with her, no matter how small that may be.

-Patience is the most critical aspect for success. We live in a "now now now" culture, but building a successful career, making great friends, building a great body, all of these things require persistence and patience

-Despite differences in cultures and wealth, people from different countries (from my sample of 30 countries) tend to live the same basic life: Go to school, graduate, get a job, get married, have babies, raise kids, grow old, raise grand kids, die

-The meaning of life is actually very simple, yet depressing: Find a woman, have kids. That's why we were put on this planet; to have children. Humans have been doing this since time began, every single culture on earth adheres to this mentality. There's something in that

-Long term travel (4+ months) is far different from a short-term holiday. Short term holidays you tend to go to all the museums, cathedrals, landmarks etc. If you travel to enough places and for long enough, bridges, churches, museums all become the same. You get more interested in meeting the local people and learning from them

I have plenty more..I'll save it for another time

Post: #45

(09-10-2015 10:54 PM)PALEO DUDE Wrote:  Experiment with high quality shrooms and lsd asap.

I've heard other guys recommend this, but I'm not sure what they actually gain from it. One guy said that when he was on some hallucinogenic he "knew everything". When I asked him for a single insight he had gained from his trips he had nothing. Not a single thing. But "he knew everything" he reiterated. Just sounds like escapism to me.


But to add something else, I think the best advice for a 20yo man is to "know what he doesn't know". If he at least goes to the effort of doing that, he'll probably do OK. It's the guys burdened with delusions and misinformation who's lives just get thrown to the wind, and end up moaning about what they'd wished they'd done, not even considering for a second why the didn't do those things as they moan.

This is why I one day want to start a school of some sort. So many young men's lives are just wasted, so many are lead to nothingness or misery, because of the negligence or maliciousness of their elders. It's immoral, and when I've understood the nature of the world to my satisfaction, and when I've proven I've walked the walk with my successes, I'm going to dedicate a substantial amount of my time to training young men in how the world actually works and how to be the most successful and happy in life they can be. It will be my katharsis.

Post: #46

(08-31-2014 06:36 PM)Veloce Wrote:  Nice list.

I just turned 33 a couple weeks ago. I'm still figuring shit out on a daily basis.

I found your quote here intersting.I think that's a big part of maturity is understanding that you don't know it all and you still have a lot to learn.

I often think/wish about going back to my 20's with the knowledge I have no in my 30's. Not only knowledge but things I maybe wish I had done differently or things I wish I had started earlier.

My main thing would just be going back to my 20's and feeling comfortable with myself, knowing who I am and just having that self confidence. Honestly when I hit my 30's I just stopped giving a shit what other people thought. I stopped trying to emulate people whether friends, celebrities, etc and actually began to think it's cool to be yourself and had an I'm gonna do me type of attitude. I think that's one ofthe biggest things young people lack and I don't know that it can be taught, I think its a process through time.

I was just watching a youtuber I like "thatbrownnerd" the other day and he was going around picking up girls using lines from some hardcore gamer video game. He was actually getting numbers too. If your into chess for example, don't act like your into motorcycles just because that may be a "cooler" hobby, if your into chess or gaming or whatever own that shit and be proud of that shit and honestly other people will think it's cool too.

If I could go back I would start saving money at an earlier age and avoiding debt. I wouldn't waste as much time or money in bars. I would have probably changed my friends I hungout with a group of friends who were good guys but who were really interested in sports which I could really give a shit about and in turn sat through so many games, sat in so many sports bars, did all this shit that I wasn't really having fun doing, but its easier to hang with friends you've grown up with than branch out and meet new people.

One of my biggest things is I wished I had started acquiring skills earlier. Things like learning a martial art, learning to sail, learning a foreign language, maybe picking up woodworking or working on cars, etc.

The one thing I think most people can do differently when they realize this stuff is take action now. I sit here saying I wish I would have done this and that as if my time has passed and I missed my window but there's nothing stopping me from going out today and joining a bjj gym or taking a class at the local community college on woodworking or... you fill in the blank.

Post: #47

(09-10-2015 10:54 PM)PALEO DUDE Wrote:  As I approach 30 I have thought of this question multiple times.

I would give my 20 year old self the following advice:

The auto-immune, very low carb paleo diet is the solution for acne, abnormal fatigue and stubborn body fat. This one tip would have changed my life.

Like your dick, your ego is reactive and does not think but unlike your dick your ego is an illusion, dutch the ego to uncover the burden on your authentic self and full potential.

Perceiving my thoughts as an observing separate entity really helps put things into perspective, especially in reactive episodes of distress.

Journal everyday for improved creativity, communication skills and memory recall.

Experiment with high quality shrooms and lsd asap.

Good advice, although telling 20 year olds to experiment with shrooms and lsd does not sound all that smart.

Post: #48

I never got this one

Quote:Most people over-extend themselves in order to get ahead. When life changing opportunities appear they are unable to take them.

Didn't understood this perfectly.
Can anyone explain what the term 'over-extending' themselves in this context means and what might he mean with the 'life changing opportunities'?

Post: #49

(11-24-2015 04:41 PM)Lime Wrote:  I never got this one

Quote:Most people over-extend themselves in order to get ahead. When life changing opportunities appear they are unable to take them.

Didn't understood this perfectly.
Can anyone explain what the term 'over-extending' themselves in this context means and what might he mean with the 'life changing opportunities'?

Basically, over-extending is committing to too much extra fluff and non-essential time consuming activities, rather than living with simplicity and minimalism. Over-extending is choosing quantity over quality. This is a problem because when 'an opportunity of a lifetime' comes up, one will not be poised to seize upon upon it.

For example, over-extending is working three mediocre jobs which is stealing all your time from building that dream business or start-up. Another example is spending your time and energy with parasitic humans, instead of investing that time and energy to build great relationships/friendships with other amazing people.

Life is finite, everything has an opportunity cost, find out what you really want to achieve and then choose to invest your time and resources wisely

Post: #50

I read somewhere that should build capital in your 20's, and go balls deep on game in your 30's, which is what I'm on track to do. I try to sprinkle in approaches from time to time, go out, and stay chirpy, but right now its MOB. (Money over bitches)