Post: #1

The Recent History

I've been finding lately I'm great at getting numbers and even dates, and second dates, but I'm terrible at escalating and eventually closing. The main issue seems to be making things sexual as opposed to friendly and chatty, which I do fine.

Sure, I'd like to date the right girl, but I feel like a lot of the girls I want to bang expect me to put in a lot of effort first (multiple dates, etc)

The Plan

A rare opportunity has come up. Beginning in May I had 2.5 months of work. Probably the last time it'll happen for me. Mid-july is the end of this bliss. I decided: fuck dating, I want to see how many girls I can bang during this period just to know if I can do it.

As mentioned above, it has started terribly. I have zero.

I had pipelined a few girls before this period started. One was a barista who seemed DTF (a 7.5 blonde). We went on two dates and there was just a make out to begin and then when I tried to sexualize (I said I wanted to eat her dirty little pussy), she freaked out and said it was moving too fast. I could have probably fixed it but it was clear she was more interested in dating me that fucking me.

So my challenge is to change into something more masculine and sexual. Sort of a Matthew McConaughey from 10 years ago. I'm power lifting all the time, no-fapping, and eating steaks several times a week.

I opened a gorgeous (8) 21 year old Persian girl in the library the other day but after several texts she brushed me off.

Despite all this work and the urgency, today I managed to not open several cute girls who smiled at me.

So hence...

The Need

I'm getting lazy and succumbing to approach anxiety. It's stupid because I don't have much time and direct approaches have worked for me most of the time in at least getting a strong number. I have a lot going for me - I just have to put into action.

So I'll document my approaches here for some measure of accountability.

Post: #2

Last of the winter pipelines - A girl my age (early 30s) from work, a bit worn out looking but still a 6. We've been exchanging dirty messages the past week. I suggest a wine and meetup at her house (I just moved) and she says okay but in a week when her friend leaves town. I feel like if I get nothing else during this phase, I should get this. And it should be good sex.

Post: #3

Day 1 (since I started posting my progress here)


The day started off pretty bad. I had told myself that I had to go direct today. On the way to the gym in the morning I saw two pretty girls walking down the sidewalk as I was biking and didn't stop. Then I saw a cafe waitress I thought I had pipelined during the winter but was cold to me the last time I was in (despite her stopping at my table for about 15 minutes the first time). Every reason to stop and say hi to her and I didn't. I was livid with myself.

Good workout at the gym - got the testosterone (T) going. Decided to go commando to keep myself thinking sexually.

I get to the library and on the way in open a 6 (short, bookish, glasses, fuckable, probably ~20) and bitch out again, just asking where I can get coffee. She is clearly not interested, giving me the bare minimum.

Then I see too gorgeous girls having a little picnic lunch in a grassy area. I want to go direct but once again ask about coffee. One is an 8.5 (and I rate conservatively), tall, lanky gorgeous Serbian and the other is an 8 blonde. Both med students (at the top university in the area) which may raise their ranking for some people. I get the directions and leave like a douche. But I come back with the coffee and chat for about 10 minutes. They just aren't giving off any indications of interest and it turns out they are good friends with one of the girls I dated in the winter (she just stopped responding to texts). They text her to say they met her "friend." It's not happening (I facebook the Serb later and she has a serious boyfriend). The other is a mystery - I just didn't build any attraction.

Now I'm just having a terrible day, frustrated at myself for being unable to go direct. It's just so psychologically painful to me. But I know and keep telling myself that I'm a good lucking, sociable guy and most or many girls would love to be approached by me.

Finally, on the way out of the library I man the fuck up, go up to the first attractive girl I see and say, "I'm leaving now, but I wanted to say you're very attractive." She is suprised, says thank you, and well, she's at a table with friends and we are whispering and it's very awkward. So I say, "that's all I wanted to say, hope to see you around."

Not the best experience, but it wasn't bad. I felt fine. It's not that bad. Turns out that's all I needed.

I direct open a girl having a cigarette outside and talk to her for a bit, but it goes nowhere. She's clearly not interested and I don't bother trying for the number.

Biking home I see a skinny Persian-looking girl. Very attractive. I stop the bike in front of her, take off my helmet and say "Hi, I had to stop my bike to tell you you're very attractive." She goes to walk away, then stops and says, "so are you." We chat. Turns out she's from Trinidad, in town helping out her family. Not as attractive as I thought on first pass. Probably a 6. Then she number closes me. Going direct is great. And she's only in town for the rest of the month so we both know where this is going.

On the way home a big-titted blonde (with the nips showing through the white teeshirt) is perpetually behind me. Finally at a stoplight I say, "are you following me?" At this point I'm just feeling it - fuck getting blown out - who cares - my mindset is great. She qualifies herself saying no, just going to X park. I sarcastically say back, "yeah sure..."

But when she opens her mouth I see some of the yellowest teeth I've seen. She drops from a 7.5 to a 4.5 in my mind. A few lights later I turn right just because I'm over it and feel awkward with her behind me. She yells, "I hope I see you again." I immediately wish I had not ejected. It may have been an easy bang and I am supposed to be collecting bangs this month. Not dating girls. She's not datable but with the lights off she's highly bangable. Shit.

Still, I bad day got a lot better. Just by simply fucking opening and giving up any outcome I had built up in my head.

I think a lot of the problem is that I'm a perfectionist in a lot of ways and until I get good, perfect just isn't a goal I should worry about.

Post: #4

the fact that you are detailing your approaches so much here tells me that you probably aren't doing enough approaches. if you were, you would be learning the lessons you need to learn yourself.

in my experience, the more discomfort i went through, the more i learned .

i initially detailed, just like you did. my true learning came from reflecting on my conclusions and lessons learned from doing all those approaches. detailing specific circumstances made me focus too much on specific interactions. growth only comes from seeing patterns, and that comes from large sample sizes.

Post: #5

Then I shall increase the sample size! (because yes, I have a lot to learn)

Went on a date tonight with the Trinidadian. Turns out without sunglasses she's more like a 5.5. She said it was tonight or next week as she was busy this weekend, so I hoofed it over to her part of town. Played some drinking games (I made up some dumb questions game) but somehow lost and ended up having to do more shots that she did. Did everything I could to get her back to my place, since she's staying with family. Described, slowly, all the dirty things I would do to her. She loved it, but would not come back. Some fondling at her doorstep but that's it.

I'm hoping the next date is the notch, otherwise, it's really not worth it.

Post: #6

Did you try the bathroom move to get in. Shouldnt have gone to her side of town if plan was to get to your place. The fact she gave you the date ultimatum tells me you are chasing her. That means keep chasing her, but make her your last priority. It's a very hard thing but your goal should be to make her feel like she is chasing you even though you are chasing her.

Something simple you could have done is. Sure tonight works, but I can't hoof it to your side of town, twisted my ankle at ju jitsu practice. You can come too this side of town though

Post: #7

I sort of tried that, but she's new to town and said she felt more comfortable in her neck of the woods. It was really annoying though. There is no way we could fuck at her place because she lives with her sister and two kids, who she essentially is the nanny for. The logistics were horrible. I had the cash for a cab ride, but she didn't bite and that was a tough sell. I brought it up during a streetside makeout when her buying temp was high, but no go.

Post: #8

I think your attitude is wrong for this stage of your development, if you don't mind me saying so.

In the early days, it will often take 2-3 dates to get to your goal. You need to be patient and accept this; enjoy it even.

In time, your skills will improve from what you have learned and the time span from meet to bedroom will shorten.

It's called Game because it's supposed to be fun; enjoy the learning curve as much as playing and you will feel less frustration.

I.e. learn to walk before you run.

Post: #9

(06-06-2014 09:36 AM)CrashBangWallop Wrote:  I think your attitude is wrong for this stage of your development, if you don't mind me saying so.

In the early days, it will often take 2-3 dates to get to your goal. You need to be patient and accept this; enjoy it even.

In time, your skills will improve from what you have learned and the time span from meet to bedroom will shorten.

It's called Game because it's supposed to be fun; enjoy the learning curve as much as playing and you will feel less frustration.

I.e. learn to walk before you run.

I don't mind at all and have been thinking the same thing myself.

Post: #10

^ Lol "i want to eat your dirty little pussy" after makeout with a 7.5 blonde.

Ballsy.

From that alone I admire aiming high, but that is outta sight.

I am the reverse, good escalation and close, tough to be chatty and rack dates.

I can tell you once she opens her body language and makes heavier eye contact time to go in.

Logistics need to be seamless, try to estimate enough time on a date so she can't say it is too late to go back to your place.

Post: #11

Don't say very attractive when you go direct, I think it puts the girls value too high almost like calling her hot point-blank.

Say I noticed you or you look good today.

Pretty, cute, and beautiful come off as cornier I have found, and attractive is a bit formal.

"excuse me, i noticed you from over there, i wanted to say hi, i'm Travesty"

"hello, i saw you and think you
look good today, i'm Travesty"

Another thing is to have a sort of
pause after the hey or excuse me and speak slowly and clearly so she can clearly
follow the conversation.

Post: #12

Relax man, don't force the process.

It sounds like you're trying too hard and beating yourself up.

Don't get hung up on being "direct" it's more important to be socially aware and responsive to the girl in real time than it is to be obliviously direct at all costs.

Work more on your eye contact, body language and vocal tonality/projection plus slowing the fuck down when you're with women if you want to amp the sexual tension. It has a lot less to do with what you say and more to do with how you say it and your vibe.

If you go around saying stuff like that without calibrating it won't lead to the results you're hoping for.

Nomad77, Giovonny and XXL have some posts that relate to this.

You can also check out RSD and some of my past posts might help you out.

Good luck.

Post: #13

(06-06-2014 10:34 PM)freewheeler Wrote:  Work more on your eye contact, body language and vocal tonality/projection plus slowing the fuck down when you're with women if you want to amp the sexual tension. It has a lot less to do with what you say and more to do with how you say it and your vibe.

this. it doesn't really matter what you say when you can look a girl in the eyes and tell her you want to fuck her without being creepy about it. i always talk about the most boring shit ever while every now and then eye fucking her. then more boring shit. then slow physical escalation. still talking about boring shit. more kino. then calmly ask her to come over.

this eliminates all the worry about saying interesting shit, and makes the situation fun for you and her all night long.

Post: #14

(06-06-2014 10:54 PM)godofwar Wrote:  

(06-06-2014 10:34 PM)freewheeler Wrote:  Work more on your eye contact, body language and vocal tonality/projection plus slowing the fuck down when you're with women if you want to amp the sexual tension. It has a lot less to do with what you say and more to do with how you say it and your vibe.

this. it doesn't really matter what you say when you can look a girl in the eyes and tell her you want to fuck her without being creepy about it. i always talk about the most boring shit ever while every now and then eye fucking her. then more boring shit. then slow physical escalation. still talking about boring shit. more kino. then calmly ask her to come over.

this eliminates all the worry about saying interesting shit, and makes the situation fun for you and her all night long.

Being able to do this is the ultimate frame test.

I like communicating this with my eyes as I speak about some banal shit; teasing her with speaking really slowly "I….want….to…..(banal shit)".

Slowly escalating as she goes into that dream world you can put women into with the right body language and voice.

It's just awesome fun really.

Post: #15

Thanks for the advice. I will slow things down and make the sexuality more implicit.

I guess my approach stemmed from the med student I mentioned above. Approached her super direct a few months ago and she loved it. She was putty in my hands. Then I thought she might be girlfriend material or maybe more, and slowed things down and she lost interest. So I've been trying to keep the alpha-directness going with mixed results, as you guys have noticed. The answer, I'm sure, is better calibration.

Post: #16

Sorry for the lack of updates. I had a family emergency earlier this week and had to help out. I did a bit of gaming - really just starting conversation, making being social my default, but nothing very serious.

Tuesday night after dinner at a restaurant/pub with the family, they left, but I stuck around because I saw two very cute girls playing pool. One was exactly my type - intelligent (I learned later), tall, thin brunette (~8) and a slightly less attractive version of Jennifer Lawrence (~7.5). I wasn't really in gaming mode because of the family stuff and had just spent a lot of time with them, so I was pretty flat. I just asked if I could get next. They enthusiastically said yes. Kind of just chatted and teased as they played but they gradually lost interest. Then some asian dude came over and asked to get next, and before I could say anything, they said they were done and he could play me. Not my desired outcome, but not bad given my frame of mind that night. I had to hang with the asian dude for a bit and it turns out he's a bartender at a popular bar and he said he'd buy me a drink there, so there's some upside.

Then today I saw a girl with this wild, beautiful hair - all natural, full, red, brown, hay and pretty much every autumnal color. It took my breath away. As she was walking by I said her hair was incredible and she said thanks, I think so too. I tried to get her to stop but she just kept going. Not a great play, but it was the first thing that sprung to mind! Just trying to be social while I go through some shit

Post: #17

Pissed at myself today.

Rolled out of bed and over to a coffee shop to look at some business plan a friend needed me to look at. Felt like garbage, and was sweating in the sun. Could of sworn this cute kinda chubby girl (but the good kind of chubby - especially that little bit of fat in between the outside cup of the bra and the armpit) with milky skin gave me a couple of looks (HB7). Then on the way out of the door she looks back, into my eyes, and smiles. She then paused and walked away. And I sat there like a dumbass.

I told myself that it was because I initially wasn't attracted to her, but that's not a reason. I bed she would have been a tremendous lay. I could also tell myself it's because I felt like garbage, wasn't ready, etc, but I just bitched out.

I didn't expect to be on the prowl this morning but I should always be ready.

Kind of expected to be more progressed at this point in the journey, but this is a good wakeup call.

Post: #18

I thought this thread was going to be about fucking moms...

Post: #19

The past few days

Things haven't been great with some family/extended family things but I'm slowly getting back into it. Really put the whole plan into disarray but family first, as they say. Putting my head down and charging forward.

Yesterday

One # and not much else of note.

Started off with a few indirect opens that went nowhere except maybe pumped me up a bit. One was a 18 year old (8) watching a soccer match at the student union bar. She chatted with me for quite a while but it was clear after a point she was just having a friendly chat. It was a struggle to find anything to talk to with her. I'm over 30.

Another was a # but just as friends. She had a boyfriend and I liked and said I had a GF but was looking for new friends because all of my friends are in the same profession as me and it gets boring. We've been texting in a lively manner and I feel like it's worth restarting every now and then for when she eventually breaks up with this guy. Maybe a 6.5 but with a great head on her shoulders (doing a degree in social work) and just so much easier to talk to than the 18 year old

That pumped me up a bit and on my way to lunch I saw a blonde 7 (maybe a bit on the bigger side, but fit - she does personal training on the side I found out later) in a dress eating lunch outside. We locked eyes and I instinctively winked. She smiles back. Instead of immediately sitting down at her table - which I should have done - I go inside and buy my lunch. When I get out she's leaving and as she walks by I tease her for having a coors light bottle at the table she's sitting at. I knew it probably wasn't hers (this has happened to me before at this eatery) and she says the same. But that gets a chat going. She comes closer to me and I realize I'm in for sure (should have known with the smile to the wink - I need to get more confident). We talk about her work - she does some admin stuff at the university and is a personal trainer. Lives in the burbs. I'm a little stumbly as she mentioned early on she needed to get back to work. I get the # and we've been texting a bit - maybe 10. I'll arrange the first date tonight.

This was a pretty good day

Today Ain't Great

I was thinking I'm getting the hang of this then I totally just freeze when I got to open a 8.5 at the library and then on the way home I see a 6 (but very young and just my type, 18 probably) in a swishy pink dress strutting down the road, I stop my bike and wait for her to come to me while I fiddle with my phone. Look up, we lock eyes and I let her go right by. I don't get why I just don't open all the time. Just when you think you are making progress...

Post: #20

Winter Pipelined 30-year old with a banging body comes back into play

This has been a long term project of mine, sending flirty texts and facebook messages. It nearly came to fruition two nights ago.

These texts started around 11pm

Her: Hey.
Me: What is happening?
Her: Partying. We need to have a fun night.
Me: You're sexy as hell.
Her: You're fucking sexy as hell and I want to fuck the shit out of you.
Me: You're on. I will do some dirty things to you.
Her: XXXX you keep saying that. So, let's get super fucked up and have super amazing sex. You can eat me out and I'll suck you off and then we can fuck like animals.
Me: I will tear that ass up. Whenever you want. Friday?
...long delay...I fall asleep
Her: I need a good fuck.
Her:I need a good fuck.
Her: Let's do this.

I'm pretty annoyed at myself for falling asleep but I've been busy lately. If I keep missing this opportunies she might feel slighted and it'll never happen.

I set something up for Saturday. Will keep you bros posted. I hope to get the first notch of this project soon.

Post: #21

Come on man its saturday you gotta post this milestone.

Post: #22

Shiiiiiiit sorry dude. I didn't think anyone was actually that interested!

+1 for the program (although not from the program, sadly) ~20 lifetime

I'd say she's a 6, 30 years old, skin a bit leathery from sun and hard living. But she knows how to fuck, that's for sure.

Met up for brunch - we each had a main and a cocktail - split the bill. Talked about fucking quite a bit during the date. Honestly, I had built social value over the past two years of knowing this woman. We work in the same industry except I'm in a much more prestigious position. I've dated her more attractive/successful friends. This was mine to fuck up and I didn't.

Said we'd go for a walk and we both knew we were walking in the direction of her place. No one said anything about it - it just sort of happened. We both wanted it. Has this happened to anyone?

I had been on a no-fap with my last indulgence about a week before, so it was hard not to cum right away. Eventually, after having to pull out several times, I got into that mode where my dick was essentially numb and there was no problem. Banged for about 20 minutes until I came on her stomach. Knowing her history I probably should have used a rubber, but I hate them. Plus, I've had my HPV shots and almost everything else is curable. May have been a bad idea - time will tell.

Passed out for about an hour, raided her fridge while she was snoozing, banged again, and then left.

I think I'll keep her in the bang rotation, but I hope I don't have to go out with her again to keep her in the mix. I was worried about running into friends since she has a bit of a bad reputation.

What's Next?

Tomorrow's a shit day but I'm meeting up with a friend Thursday and plan to do as many direct opens as I can on campus and around campus. I've been bitching out on a lot of direct opens as I bike by girls. I find something very difficult about stopping the bike and approaching. That's a sticking point I have to get over.

There are a lot of old men, the disabled, etc, who would kill to be young again. I shouldn't take it for granted.

Post: #23

After notching my first bang of the program (but not from the program), dozens of approaches, putting on five pounds of muscle, getting tan, etc, I really thought I'd be more advanced than I am now and it's really pissing me off.

Today was a day full of pussying out

It started with seeing an HB8 walking her dog. Maybe 20, beautiful sundress. I bike over and start taking off my helmet because I look like a douche in a bike helmet (who doesn't?). She looks up and gives me a sourpuss and I bike off like a douche.

I'm sitting in an office all day with a friend helping put together his business plan. I finally head home, see a cute girl walking down the street and just don't do anything. At the last minute I thought she could be younger than 17, so I freaked. But really, that's just an excuse.

There were a few more, but really I just was a bitch all day.

Tomorrow I'm meeting another guy for lunch and we have a plan. Here's what I e-mailed him:

"meet at X library at 1. at that point I will give you a $20 bill. If I don't get the numbers of 5 fuckable girls (your decision, on the reasonable person "objective" standard) in an hour then you buy us lunch (maybe schwarma) with that cash and keep the change. if I get five or more, you give it back."

I think I need the accountability. What do you guys think?

Post: #24

Try it out man.

Ultimately however, I get the sense that you're putting WAY too much pressure on yourself and are constantly holding yourself to these ridiculous personal expectations that are detrimental to your confidence.

Meeting women and having sexually charged interactions is entirely natural and effortless. Aside from initiating the conversation and having your subcommunications dialed in, it's either on or it isn't. You should also be more concerned with whether or not YOU actually like the girls you meet and less so whether they like you or not.

It should be fun, not stressful.

Try taking all of this less seriously, maybe even take a short break.

You might like Alex from RSD's concept of "relaxed arousal" in terms of mindset.

Keep us updated.

Post: #25

Thanks man - it's good to know someone is interested.

I guess deep down, the real reason I'm upset with myself is I've been reading about all you guys the past couple of years and figured if I had any time off, I could do the same stuff. Now I only have three weeks before I have to get back to work and haven't done nearly what I thought I would.

So I think you are onto something and I'll try to take it easy. And I'll check out that relaxed arousal.