Post: #1

If anyone wants to see my beta backstory, it's pretty sad but you can check it out here: /thread-34397.html

I had a busy day and wasn't in the mood to go out last night. My plan was to go see the new Ahnold movie by myself and then call it a night. Then I decided to have one drink beforehand at the bar where I use to work.

This usually goes one of two ways; my old friends are there either working or drinking and I own the place, or it's weird, off and annoying, and then I'm pissed at myself for not having the balls to hit on any chicks and filling myself with empty calories for nothing.

Last night happened to be a night that a lot of my friends and a lot of chicks were there, so I got treated like a king, which makes me look cool. I thought, ok… The night seems to be giving me a little advantage here. Let's just roll with it a little and see what transpires.

Something was different this time though. This was my first night going out since I started my daily regimen of reading, exercising and meditating. I felt cool, calm and collected, as opposed to nervous or sexually frustrated. The key was not giving a fuck. If it was lame I was just gonna go see my movie and go home.

Right off the bat people were hugging me and buying me drinks so it put me in an energetic mood. At moments I wandered around by myself and just soaked in the setting.

My buddy from down south who works there (let's call him Mike) randomly introduced me to this lovely 22 year-old waitress on duty who I've always wanted to talk to. We'll call her Emily because she looks like Emily Blunt - very natural next door neighbor type. Every time she ended up near me I chatted it up with her.

She started to seem interested, asking questions in an engaging way. She told me it was going to be her last week there and I asked if I could give her a call sometime. She said "Yeah, definitely! Mike has my number." So I got those digits and haven't texted her as of yet.

I was also hanging near the bar with Mike by this cute very petite girl with glasses. Slightly nerdy (not in a bad way) with a very tight little body. I'll call her Natalie. She was by a plate of stale looking corn muffins, so I offered her one and teased her a little just to make her laugh. Turned out Mike knew her a bit and introduced us as well (I think Mike's my new best friend lol).

I asked her what she was drinking and she pointed to Mike's pitcher of bud light. I made a face, which made her laugh again, and asked if I could get her a real drink. She said she'd been trying to get the bartender to come over. I was like, "I got you sweetheart." I got the bartender over immediately with a simple nod and gesture. I don't know how everything was going so smooth.

She was waiting for her girl friend to show up and eat with her. I saved their seats while she went to the bathroom, which she really appreciated. Then I got pulled away in some other directions, before we had a real chance to talk. I figured I'd let her eat with her friend and then maybe re-approach later, because I still really wanted Emily Blunt's number and hadn't accomplished that yet.

I saw an alpha dude hitting on Natalie towards the end, which would normally annoy me but I could've cared less. I kind of laughed about it in my head. Then as she and her friend were leaving around bar time, they went out of their way to talk to me on the way out.

She said, "You seem pretty famous around here." I don't remember exactly how I responded by everything still felt miraculously smooth. Then she said hopefully they'll see me there again.

Then I broke the first alpha rule of the night, and instead of asking her for her number, I said, "Cool, let me give you my card so you can call me sometime." And I handed it to Natalie. I know it wasn't exactly the way to go, but as I was stumbling back home I got the following text:

NATALIE: Wait a minute. They kept calling you Mike at the bar but your card says *****. What's your real name?

Before I go any further I just want to ask that you Alpha guys cut me a little slack on my texting skills. I know wordy texts are the enemy. But I'm brand new to this so don't get too upset with me lol. AND I was drunk at this point (my tolerance has gone down a bit). It's going to sound very beta. Just warning…

ME: It's ***** Lets grab a drink sometime.

ME: Mike's the southern guy.

ME: This Natalie right?

Then I thought to myself; 3 texts (at the same time)… Yup I just fucked that one up. Oh well… But then…

NATALIE: Southern?? Why does he sound Australian?!??! LOL. I don't drink much to be honest. And yes… This is Natalie

(around 2 hours later)

ME: Haha he might be an Aussie who knows. I don't drink much either. We can grab a root beer float or something

(today around 11am)

NATALIE: I think something would be better. Hope you're having a pleasant day

Haven't replied yet. Love to get thoughts from anyone. Should I send just one post-meeting text to emily blunt; "Hey Emily it's Mike's friend *****. This is my number. Say hi to *****" (the name of her unusual pet she told me about). Or something like that, or should I wait a day or two? Or do I need the post meeting text before she forgets about me?

And I'm assuming I shouldn't reply to Natalie today, right? Normally I'd be like - "Cool, no root beer " or something lame like that. But I should just hit her up in a few days right?

I'll review the newbie texting threads and related articles, but feel free to chime in. The advice on here has been great so far.

Thanks!

-EpicBeta (soon to be alpha )

Post: #2

Just texted the "Emily Blunt" looking girl;

ME: Hey Megan it Mike's friend *****. Heres my # say hi to (pets name)

EMILY: Hi Hello! It was nice to meet you last night. (pets name) charged at me so methinks he's having an off day. Ha! Getting ready for work but we should talk soon

Post: #3

(03-29-2014 09:02 PM)EpicBeta Wrote:  Just texted the "Emily Blunt" looking girl;

ME: Hey Megan it Mike's friend *****. Heres my # say hi to (pets name)

EMILY: Hi Hello! It was nice to meet you last night. (pets name) charged at me so methinks he's having an off day. Ha! Getting ready for work but we should talk soon

ME: Told you he was a warthog sounds good hav fun at work

HER: You might be on to something. Thanks!

Boom! done. she was the last to text. probably hit her up midweek. thanks red pill! lol

OOPS just realized I started calling her Megan instead of Emily Blunt, because she also reminds me a little of Megan Boone. Sorry if that was confusing! ha

Post: #4

If I was you, I'd relax a little bit with the number of smiley face or wink face emoticons. For every 3-5 she sends, you can send 1. Don't go overboard. Other than that, nice job sir.

Post: #5

So where to start...

Quote:She started to seem interested, asking questions in an engaging way. She told me it was going to be her last week there and I asked if I could give her a call sometime. She said "Yeah, definitely! Mike has my number." So I got those digits and haven't texted her as of yet.

1. Don't be excited about phone numbers
2. Don't ask if you can call her, or ask for her number.

I try to sleep with every girl the night I meet them, it just saves me time in the long run, ESPECIALLY with bar chicks. If I can tell it's not going down that night, or it was a warm up approach that went really well, but I still want to do more approaches, then I usually just say something like, "We should hang out sometime." If she does anything but walk away, I take out my phone or tell her my number and tell her to text me her name. I prefer the later, because I've saved names wrong before.

Quote:I saw an alpha dude hitting on Natalie towards the end, which would normally annoy me but I could've cared less. I kind of laughed about it in my head. Then as she and her friend were leaving around bar time, they went out of their way to talk to me on the way out.

So, that should bother you. If it's some beta guy, he's doing you a favor and making you look good, but if his game is better than yours, you're risking your girl(s) getting sharked.

Quote:Then I broke the first alpha rule of the night, and instead of asking her for her number, I said, "Cool, let me give you my card so you can call me sometime." And I handed it to Natalie. I know it wasn't exactly the way to go, but as I was stumbling back home I got the following text:

This is funny to me because you operated on instinct, and giving her your card was way smoother than asking for her number. The fact that she text you immediately after is a great sign.

Quote:Then I thought to myself; 3 texts (at the same time)… Yup I just fucked that one up. Oh well… But then…

Ya, try not to do that in the future. You got a pass here though, because this girl is into you.

Quote:And I'm assuming I shouldn't reply to Natalie today, right? Normally I'd be like - "Cool, no root beer " or something lame like that. But I should just hit her up in a few days right?

No don't wait a couple days, I think this is a huge mistake that lots of guys (even seasoned ones make). Anything can happen in a couple of days, she's into you NOW. I'd text her today and set something up for mid week (Tue-Thur). Come up with a fun "something" and if you get stuck with what to text back, the guys in this thread, are great at helping people out.

Overall, a great first night out. I remember my first night out after reading Roosh's book, I felt I always had the tools, I just wasn't utilizing them in a way that got me maximum results. That first night I went out after reading Bang, I got my 5th SNL, my 6th a few nights later, and I've never looked back. Damn, I love that book and this site.

Post: #6

(03-30-2014 11:33 AM)CJ Wrote:  

Quote:And I'm assuming I shouldn't reply to Natalie today, right? Normally I'd be like - "Cool, no root beer " or something lame like that. But I should just hit her up in a few days right?

No don't wait a couple days, I think this is a huge mistake that lots of guys (even seasoned ones make). Anything can happen in a couple of days, she's into you NOW. I'd text her today and set something up for mid week (Tue-Thur). Come up with a fun "something" and if you get stuck with what to text back, the guys in this thread, are great at helping people out.

Damn I didn't play this part exactly right. I DID send her a text yesterday evening (7ish) in response to her text that morning around 11. But all I said was "Haha k no root beer floats. Talk soon"

Guess I should've tried to make plans. And she didn't reply so now I was the last one to text. Shit lol

At this point, I don't want to come off needy or anything, so I should wait a minute to follow up, right? Or should I text her again this evening to make plans during the week?

One issue I have is that I work swing shift (230-11ish) Mon-Thurs so it's a little tricky to do anything before Fri. Unless we met for coffee or something... Not sure how red pillers feel about coffee dates. She said she's not much of a drinker though… She seems a little more on the wholesome side (she wasn't hanging with other hot chicks - her chick friend was super overweight - just to give you an idea of the type of girl this is…).

Anyway, wondering what the best move will be after my last text, since I screwed up a little and was the last to reply.

The Emily Blunt waitress girl on the other hand was the last to reply to me. I have to review the texting advice links again, but I'm thinking about just hitting her up to make plans in a couple days since we texted yesterday.

Thanks for the awesome freedback! I agree the ppl on this forum are a great help.

Cheers

Post: #7

Yea bra, i got some advice. Don't let the wins get to your head and don't let the losses get to your heart.
You're doing well. Keep it up.

Post: #8

Good progress there bro. Much better than doing nothing. Though I gotta say number really doesn't mean much. It's good you got them and it's mandatory to get them, but the number to date rate conversion is about 20-25 to 1 and date to sex is about 7 to 1 for newbies. But if you don't plow hard and get the numbers you will never get there, so keep it up.

And stop with the smiley. Download Roosh guide on text game. It's free.

Post: #9

Thanks y'all.

Looking over the texting threads now so I can at least get a date or two lined up. I'll download the texting guide too.

Am a tiny bit stuck with what to say next as I mentioned but those should help me.

Cheers

Post: #10

Ok here's my plan. Since I messed up a little on my last text to Natalie yesterday I think I'll wait until this evening and say:

"Hey it's that super cool guy u met at **** fri. We should meet for that -something- this week. What days u free?"

I know it sucks that I was the last to respond, and I feel like I almost blew her off ("Haha k no root beer floats. Talk soon"). So she probably won't respond. Think I need to jump on that before the end of the weekend at least.

As for Emily I'm going to text her tonight; "so where abouts do Emily and mr (pets name) live?"

After she responds I can say something like "Fun. We should meet up this week or wknd. Any free time?"

Anyway that's my follow up plan as of right now. If it sounds terrible feel free to let me know.

Thanks!

Post: #11

(03-30-2014 06:46 PM)EpicBeta Wrote:  Ok here's my plan. Since I messed up a little on my last text to Natalie yesterday I think I'll wait until this evening and say:

"Hey it's that super cool guy u met at **** fri. We should meet for that -something- this week. What days u free?"

I know it sucks that I was the last to respond, and I feel like I almost blew her off ("Haha k no root beer floats. Talk soon"). So she probably won't respond. Think I need to jump on that before the end of the weekend at least.

As for Emily I'm going to text her tonight; "so where abouts do Emily and mr (pets name) live?"

After she responds I can say something like "Fun. We should meet up this week or wknd. Any free time?"

Anyway that's my follow up plan as of right now. If it sounds terrible feel free to let me know.

Thanks!

Not to rain on your parade dude, but seriously read Roosh guide on texting. In short, cut the cheesy stuff and stop trying to build value/attraction over text. If you can't do it in person what makes you think you can do it over text where you have no value and have to dance to her tune. Cut the bold stuff and keep the italic.

I was exactly where you are now a year ago. I would get high on texting game and in the end I realized that I become their text buddy, or be "text-zoned" They only feel comfortable TEXTING you, not WITH YOU.

Instead of wasting time on texting girls, go out and get more number and mass-text them.

Post: #12

Nice. This a newbie post. You should read all the the threads in newbie forum.

Post: #13

[/quote]
Not to rain on your parade dude, but seriously read Roosh guide on texting. In short, cut the cheesy stuff and stop trying to build value/attraction over text. If you can't do it in person what makes you think you can do it over text where you have no value and have to dance to her tune. Cut the bold stuff and keep the italic.
[/quote]

Ah okay that does make sense and I read Roosh's guide on texting. I'm now planing to follow up with these two chicks tomorrow (since I texted them both yesterday - 1day to build suspense. could wait even another day, but I feel like it probably isn't necessary), and cut to the point rather than trying to text-flirt as much. I'll be a little playful if they are, but I promise to keep it as minimal as possible, and just try to get a plan made.

Thanks for that. The texting guide and related threads were very helpful.

Post: #14

Update: I'm being presented with an interesting challenge.

I texted both girls early evening;

ME - Hey Natalie. ***** from *****. How r u?

HER- Hey *****! I'm well. How are u?

ME - Not bad typical mon. We should meet up this week. Any free time?

HER - Im only available in the AM

ME - Same on wknd?

HER - Except sundays

ME - Im a night worker too.

HER - Crazy! Thats perfect then. Where do u live?

ME - Were vampires I'm in *****. U?

HER - I'm currently residing in *****
HER - Ha!ha! Not quite. I love vampires though

ME- Ha *****? Is that in *****

HER- Yea. It is. It's off the *** near ****

ME- Ah, I see. Cool. Gonna sort out my schedule for the week then I'll text u.

HER - Sounds good

Sent the same opener to the other girl but no response. Oh well.

Wondering what to do with this. She's not a party girl (doesn't drink much but some) and wants to do something during the day, like before work:/ A drink in the evening would obviously be easiest, but it looks like it's going to be a sober 1st date, likely without sex.

I'm fine with that. I think maybe I can get her comfortable first (she's a lot younger), then get her to come out on a second date at night and make it sexier.

Anyone have ideas on how to approach this one? I was thinking brunch at the swankiest cafe I can find near her, send her a text tomorrow; "brunch on thurs work for u?" Or is brunch a terrible idea? I don't know where else to start other than coffee.

It's a little unusual. But if anyone has a good idea, feel free to let me know. If not, no worries.

Thanks!

P.S. I know I'm not supposed to use smiley faces, but I thought just on for this particular girl would be okay, and she responded well. Promise I'm kicking that habit hahaha.

Post: #15

Gawd I fucking hate the texting game lol. Trying to train myself to be more red pill in my responses and have more fun with it but it's hands down my least favorite part of modern dating. I can already feel myself fucking this up.

The latest with "Natalie" can be read here /thread-34681.html.

I did end up hearing back from "Emily" today- a full day after I text her to lock down a date (our initial texting is earlier in this thread);

Me- Hey Emily. ***** from *****. How r u? (Yesterday)

Her (today)- feeling a little peaky. Resting up and hydrating like a little health machine. Hope all's well.

Me- (about 5 hrs later) Ha that's good. We should meet up sometime. Any free time this week?

-I know, HUGE no no. Never make it a question. My bad. I choked. Won't happen again.

Her- No, but I should know my schedule by this weekend

Me- Cool I'll buzz u this wknd. Hav a good week!

Goddamn my beta-ness. Should've skipped the hav a good week part. Old habits die hard but I promise I'm working on it.

No response now of course. Guess I'll hit her up late afternoon/early evening on Sat - say I'm going to some sexy wine bar or something like around 9, and TELL her to come and meet me for a glass.

Ugh... Shits exhausting yo. Hahaha. Pls let me know if u have any advice on following up w this one. Doing my best to self educate as well. Just a little tricky sometimes when timing is an issue.

Thanks!

Post: #16

It's good you're gaining an awareness of what you're doing wrong...now just take a breath next time before messaging. Think, then hit send.

It seems like you're giving her way too much validation asking her for her schedule...and free day...and activity. Pick something fun that you like to do on a chill night (Mon-Thurs, or Sun) and invite her out.

Girl at a bar who drinks will definitely grab a drink again, even if it's a glass of wine. Same with the other chick.

Think of it as a progression: you approached, you chatted, and you number closed. Now ask them out on a date: i.e. "I'm hitting up blah blah bar tmrw night, best cocktails in town. Come join"

She'll say yes, no, maybe or propose another day. You now know where she stands on going out with you, so you can proceed accordingly.

Oh, another thing. Don't fall for the trap of "hit me up this weekend/next week." from a girl. She's gaming you and making you work for her. It's a bad place to be in. Just say "k" or no response, then hit her up in 5 days with the "I'm hitting up.. blah blah" text.

It's all learning, no matter what happens. Have fun

Post: #17

Awesome!!! That sounds perfect. Can't thank you enough Chef!

Post: #18

The things you're worried about aren't that big of mistakes, I wouldn't worry so much. Sounds like you're on the right track.

Keep in mind that a girl you text can flake or stop texting for a million reasons, most of which are completely unrelated to anything you did. That's why I try to hang out again ASAP, before I'm just some random dude they met and text occasionally.

Ideally, you set something up quick and hangout within a week of meeting, two weeks tops. Anything longer and 99 times out of 100 it's not worth it to keep trying. Either you'll never hang out and/or she'll flake if you set something up, or you'll be starting over even if you do hang out. I'm weird and don't delete those numbers right away though, but it's only because I like to try different angles on cold leads for the sake of using anything that gets an enthusiastic response, on different girls down the road.

Post: #19

Don't analyze it too much, just keep getting numbers and realize this is all a learning process.