Post: #51

I got one from tonight.

Went to this event, catered (with shitty food), formal-ish. I'm waiting outside the bathroom and the person in the bathroom was this 8/10 blonde chick who was one of the caterers. She smiled and held the door open for me.

I go in and the bathroom reeks of pussy (good pussy smell), and her perfume. Just as I think to myself how much better that is than the normal stank of bathrooms I look down in the toilet and theres a huge swirling shit-stain in the toilet bowl.

Turned out the chick was my server and she brought me every course, every time smiling awkwardly, haaha.

Post: #52

(12-14-2013 11:12 PM)WesternCancer Wrote:  I got one from tonight.

Went to this event, catered (with shitty food), formal-ish. I'm waiting outside the bathroom and the person in the bathroom was this 8/10 blonde chick who was one of the caterers. She smiled and held the door open for me.

I go in and the bathroom reeks of pussy (good pussy smell), and her perfume. Just as I think to myself how much better that is than the normal stank of bathrooms I look down in the toilet and theres a huge swirling shit-stain in the toilet bowl.

Turned out the chick was my server and she brought me every course, every time smiling awkwardly, haaha.

You probably ingested some of her fecal particles.

Post: #53

There's a girl I hooked up with whose hands were really calloused. She actually did rough up my suspect and made the shaft chaff. I guess that's a bad hygiene thing?

I was eating a girl out, 69 style, and the faint smell off shit wafted in to my nose.

The worst is when you stick a finger in a girls ass, and you meet a finger of shit. This happened on numerous occasions, and I don't understand how girls can walk around with a turd 3-4 inches into their rectums as if it's not there. Why can't they just shit it out and be clean?

AHH-

My first kiss was one of the worst I've ever had. It second to last night at sleepaway camp and there was this girl that everyone called cement mixer. I didn't know why. We played truth or dare and I french kissed her. Whoo-hoo!

But.. after a few minutes, I felt this crazy feeling of discomfort, almost of pain, in my mouth.

I ran back to my bunk and spit and washed my mouth out.

Turns out that the reason they called her cement mixer was because she hadn't brushed her teeth for the entire month that she'd been at camp.

Post: #54

(12-14-2013 11:40 PM)soup Wrote:  The worst is when you stick a finger in a girls ass, and you meet a finger of shit. This happened on numerous occasions

And what exactly were you expecting to find in someone's rectum?

Post: #55

(12-15-2013 12:15 AM)speakeasy Wrote:  

(12-14-2013 11:40 PM)soup Wrote:  The worst is when you stick a finger in a girls ass, and you meet a finger of shit. This happened on numerous occasions

And what exactly were you expecting to find in someone's rectum?

Hahaha yeah seriously.

Post: #56

(12-15-2013 12:15 AM)speakeasy Wrote:  

(12-14-2013 11:40 PM)soup Wrote:  The worst is when you stick a finger in a girls ass, and you meet a finger of shit. This happened on numerous occasions

And what exactly were you expecting to find in someone's rectum?

He found.... the Extra-Terrestrial:

   

Post: #57

(12-15-2013 12:15 AM)speakeasy Wrote:  

(12-14-2013 11:40 PM)soup Wrote:  The worst is when you stick a finger in a girls ass, and you meet a finger of shit. This happened on numerous occasions

And what exactly were you expecting to find in someone's rectum?

A clean path for good times, not an asteroid of the dirt star system.

Post: #58

I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

Post: #59

Post: #60

(12-15-2013 09:23 PM)007 Wrote:  I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

This would be a fun game show.

Offer a bunch of SWPLs chunks of pussy discharge served on a platter, and tell them it's a form of exotic cheese.

Then watch as they taste it and gush about the "soft, comforting texture" of it and its "mature, aged flavor with a hint of smoke, almost like a sharper Parmesan."

Post: #61

Hahahah, this show would be for only the 'most serious of stank pussy connoisseurs'

(12-15-2013 10:05 PM)Kabal Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 09:23 PM)007 Wrote:  I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

This would be a fun game show.

Offer a bunch of SWPLs chunks of pussy discharge served on a platter, and tell them it's a form of exotic cheese.

Then watch as they taste it and gush about the "soft, comforting texture" of it and its "mature, aged flavor with a hint of smoke, almost like a sharper Parmesan."

Post: #62

(12-15-2013 10:05 PM)Kabal Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 09:23 PM)007 Wrote:  I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

This would be a fun game show.

Offer a bunch of SWPLs chunks of pussy discharge served on a platter, and tell them it's a form of exotic cheese.

Then watch as they taste it and gush about the "soft, comforting texture" of it and its "mature, aged flavor with a hint of smoke, almost like a sharper Parmesan."

That's so incredibly disgusting that I can't even give the post a like for the satire and original idea

Post: #63

Hahahaha, you have no idea man. It was some real Freddy Kruger shit, I can't believe she couldn't smell it. My fingers and groin area stank of that vaginal ricotta stench for 10 days afterwards.

(12-16-2013 07:40 AM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 10:05 PM)Kabal Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 09:23 PM)007 Wrote:  I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

This would be a fun game show.

Offer a bunch of SWPLs chunks of pussy discharge served on a platter, and tell them it's a form of exotic cheese.

Then watch as they taste it and gush about the "soft, comforting texture" of it and its "mature, aged flavor with a hint of smoke, almost like a sharper Parmesan."

That's so incredibly disgusting that I can't even give the post a like for the satire and original idea

Post: #64

I was fingering my girlfriend at the time. When I pulled my fingers out, I had a pea sized piece of blood soaked mucus on my finger. My girlfriend then picked it off my finger, smelled it, then deposited it on a piece of tissue and put it in the bin. She then had the gaul to have a go at me because of how disgusted I was.

Still makes me baulk thinking about it.

Post: #65

(12-15-2013 10:05 PM)Kabal Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 09:23 PM)007 Wrote:  I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

This would be a fun game show.

Offer a bunch of SWPLs chunks of pussy discharge served on a platter, and tell them it's a form of exotic cheese.

Then watch as they taste it and gush about the "soft, comforting texture" of it and its "mature, aged flavor with a hint of smoke, almost like a sharper Parmesan."

hahahahahahahahahaha.... this game show would be the funniest nastiest shit ever.... and I'd totally watch

Post: #66

(12-16-2013 09:51 PM)Mr. Butterworth Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 10:05 PM)Kabal Wrote:  

(12-15-2013 09:23 PM)007 Wrote:  I was fingering and kissing a chick in bed, got her soaking wet and that's when the stench started to emanate (nasty sour stench). Being a bit tipsy I ignored the foulness and started to rub her nipple with my wet fingers (because I get down like that). This is when it hit me, the nastiest most sour smell I have even experienced, to make it worse there was some white shit on my fingers (like small crumbs of ricotta). Disgusting, I assume this was some type of fungus / yeast infection.

Thankfully, I've been pretty lucky and the vast majority of snatch that I have experienced have been nice and clean.

This would be a fun game show.

Offer a bunch of SWPLs chunks of pussy discharge served on a platter, and tell them it's a form of exotic cheese.

Then watch as they taste it and gush about the "soft, comforting texture" of it and its "mature, aged flavor with a hint of smoke, almost like a sharper Parmesan."

hahahahahahahahahaha.... this game show would be the funniest nastiest shit ever.... and I'd totally watch

i remember some show where a chick drank a huge amount of donkey cum so this isnt far off

Post: #67

I think I have post-traumatic cunnilingus disorder.

Post: #68

I have a few so hold on tight...

Most recently i had a girl over at my house. We were drinking for the past 2 hours mainly spiced rum then she switched to Malibu and the proceeded to mix them together.
So i have her in my bed with only her panties on. I'm making some really good progress when she turns around and says she doesn't feel well and then asks me for a glass of water.
I give it to her and we go lay back down. About 5 minutes later i still working on fucking her when she puts her hands on her face and wont talk to me or turn to look at me.
Then she puts her hands over her mouth and proceeds to vomit all over my bed...apparently she had 2 xmas dinners in rapid succession some of it came up.
I tell her to get into the shower and i'll change my sheets (i was way too tired to driver her home, it was around 3am). I go into the bathroom to check on her and i notice her white panties and a combination of blood and shit in them.
As i look back at her she is just sitting in my stand up shower puking up on herself...
I slammed a redbull and brought her home that night.

A few years ago i worked in a clothing store.
I was running the register and this teenaged girl comes up and the smell hits me like a right cross.
Like rotten tuna and spoiled cottage cheese.
She hands me the clothes she wants to buy they also smell like her...I held my breath for that entire transaction.

A few years ago at a different clothing store
I didn't work that day but the other girls told me about how a woman went to try clothes on in a fitting room and when they went to remove the clothes they discovered a used sanitary napkin in the corner or the fitting room.

An ex-gf started to make noise about how i never went down on her. So 1 day i decided to appease her and attempted to eat her out...the smell was so bad...my eyes started to water and i couldn't breathe. I told her i wasn't gonna do it. She started to cry so we just fucked a little bit later on.
I thought i would be slick and make her suck my dick after fucking her so she can know how she tastes.
She didn't like how her pussy tasted and i never heard her complain to me again...


A tip for the guys here about getting female scents off your hands and or cock.
I use Gillett Body Wash
Post sex with my main girl i use it like liquid hand soap and wash my cock and balls off.
I'd imagine any type of body wash for men would work.

Girls can control their smell downstairs. Its all diet and personal hygiene habits.

Post: #69

So this thread shows that the worst hygiene issues a girl can have are doody and smelly pussy/period issues. Anything other than that?

Post: #70

(12-30-2013 02:28 AM)soup Wrote:  So this thread shows that the worst hygiene issues a girl can have are doody and smelly pussy/period issues. Anything other than that?

I knew a girl who always had food in her teeth whenever she came over, but that seems tame by comparison.

Post: #71

Evangelical Christians could have a successful run of convincing young virgins to save it for marriage using nothing more than the written contents of this thread.

Post: #72

thanks to this thread I am now petrified of having sex.

jesus christ, women are gross hahahaha.

last year I was dating two girls at once, and I think the main reason I decided to go exclusive with the one was because she shaved her pussy and it smelled better than the other one. I've never had an outright awful pussy stench to deal with but there've been some pungent ones.

Post: #73

First time I went down on a girl:

We were on the floor in front of her wardrobe.

I started licking her out, and was going at it for about thirty seconds.

Then I realised: It fucking STANK and tasted like absolute SHIT.

I lifted my head up and said "Fuck, I'm gonna throw up"

I reached into the wardrobe, picked out a plastic stationary wallet and violently threw up into it.

Then I walked downstairs with the thing. I wanted to throw it in the trash can.

On the way, her father intercepted me:

"Have you just been sick Leighton? Don't worry son, I'll take care of it" *hands over plastic wallet* "....Lovely"

I then went back upstairs.

Me: "You have to admit that was pretty funny haha". Her: "NO IT WASN'T".

Also, I was fingering her once. After finishing, I pulled my fingers out and had a horrible, stinky white blob of fluid on them.

I went to the bathroom and washed it off. The walk felt like an egg-and-spoon race, but with fingers and vaginal fluid.

Females are disgusting.

Also: This one isn't about me, but it's worth a share. It's from a RVF member who doesn't post here ('whand'):

It's about a friend of his:

Apparently, this guy liked to banged Thai prostitutes in the arse all the time, without a condom.

One day though, after a session, he felt a sharp pain in the tip of his penis.

He went to the doctor to get it checked out.

He had the seed from a jalapeno pepper stuck in there!

They removed it with tweezers.

I haven't had jalapenos in my Subway for two months now, because of this.

Post: #74

Not the worst. Cigarettes can fuck up the sweetest pussy smell. Girl started smoking sometime and her pussy juices got a odor of ash tray. I guess it happens with cum too.

Post: #75

There has been foul vag smells. It comes with the territory sometimes. You bang enough girls your gonna find some that smell like hot garbage and corn chips. It's never stopped me from getting my nut off but has cost some lovely ladies a second bang.

A few times when I was banging girls in the butt there ended up being poo all over my dick. I really only remember two times when it was bad bad...like a lot of it. The first time it happened I still finished up and got my nut. Then the girl was mortified an said just take me home. I gave her a towel and said "Sometimes when you play in the dirt, you get mud" haha I still banged her in the butt a few times after that and there was no more problems.

A hot 16 year old girl I had just met 2 hours ago through a mutual girlfriend said she wanted me to be her first. I decided that sounded like a great idea. I take her to my friends apartment and light some candles and put on some Barry White (my friends cd collection was not the greatest) So we start making out and I pull down her pants and she the biggest bush I have ever seen in my life. It wasnt like just above the vag it was all around it, thick, long dark hairs. This was my first encounter with anything like this (later in Asia I delt with lots of bush) It freaked me out but I still went down on her and then proceeded to .

One time way back in the day I was banging my girlfriends throat and she had just eating a chicken alfredo tv dinner. An all of a sudden she projectile vomits all over me and the couch and the wall and it SMELLS SO BAD. Being big in the party scene I had seen and smelled lots of puke from drinking ans shit but none like this. It was awful.... An also it seemed like none of the noddles that came back up had been chewed.. they were all solid normal looking noodles. Bishes need to learn to chew their food better. In the face banging businesses I have had lots of girls puke from a throat full of dick. None were anywhere close to bad as that time with the noodles. Most of the times it happens the girls get all freaked out and stop... I'm not into puke by any means but I'm still sitting there with a raging boner that needs delt with. The damage is done just finish up then we can go about cleaning up the mess.

Funny story that has nothing to do with hygiene really but I will tell it anyway. Me and a friend of mine was running train on this chick one day. I end up busting a nut her face and big titties. My friend can't make the money shot so she gets on top of him while hes sitting on the couch an shes riding him. While doing so her tits are bouncing all close to his face, hes all turning his head an like trying to get away but doesn't say anything or stop her from riding him.... When she stops riding an get off hes got my jizz from her titts on his goatee LOL!!!!! I was fucking dying laughing......... he ended up being a shitty friend down the road anyway.