Post: #1

I've had intercourse with over 30 girls this year - way more than in any other year of my life. I have broken off at least 4 or 5 "relationships" with girls who were hoping to be my GF. I have a ton going for me and have a full dating pipeline.

But I'm so low tonight. Why? Because a girl that I'm better looking than, more successful than, more fit than, smarter than, funnier than, more engaging than texted me that she "didn't feel a connection" when I texted her asking when we were going to grab drinks again.

Even though I know for a fact all of the things that I listed above to be true, even though I've cold-heartedly blown off at least 7 or 8 girls THIS YEAR ALONE who are hotter than her, it still stings me.

We had so much in common - we both loved the same artsy movies, we both played viola growing up, we really CONNECTED. I made out with her at the end and she moaned before I retreated from her beater car into my $50,000 car. It was a weeknight and I had a 6AM wake up bomb the next morning. Was sure I'd done enough to see her again and likely get her home next go round. And now she's blowing me off.

I am okay when a 10 who's dated college football players and NHL players blows me off. I get it. But a quirky 7 who I found endearing and really liked and had genuinely great conversation with? Sucks. I don't get it. I thought GIRLS were the romantic ones - the emotional ones who valued conversation and common interests and witty banter more than guys did. I should be an alpha caveman who rejects her b/c I'm higher on the value scale, not the wimpering pussy who is sad because I loved our time together and our connection.

Post: #2

even A-list celebrities get rejected. you cant just plug some numbers into a calculator and know the outcome

also some girls are extremely charismatic. they may not be the hottest physically but they have something alluring about them that makes them seem much more attractive

sounds like you just wanted to rant. there's nothing anyone can tell you that you dont already know. "its a numbers game"

if you dont want to play the game, settle down with one of the girls who was begging to be your girlfriend

Post: #3

(10-29-2013 09:07 PM)MikeinMKE Wrote:  We had so much in common - we both loved the same artsy movies, we both played viola growing up, we really CONNECTED. I made out with her at the end and she moaned before I retreated from her beater car into my $50,000 car. It was a weeknight and I had a 6AM wake up bomb the next morning. Was sure I'd done enough to see her again and likely get her home next go round. And now she's blowing me off.

I am okay when a 10 who's dated college football players and NHL players blows me off. I get it. But a quirky 7 who I found endearing and really liked and had genuinely great conversation with? Sucks. I don't get it. I thought GIRLS were the romantic ones - the emotional ones who valued conversation and common interests and witty banter more than guys did. I should be an alpha caveman who rejects her b/c I'm higher on the value scale, not the wimpering pussy who is sad because I loved our time together and our connection.

Girls always complain that guys are players.

Yet they love manufacturing them on demand by their inane behavior.

You could have gone straight. Unlike Michael Corleone, you could have left the life of crime behind.

But these girls pull you back in.

We've all been there! Look in the mirror, take a deep breath, and toughen yourself up even more than you already have.

Next time, you can go back to playing the girls instead of being played.

Post: #4

(10-29-2013 09:07 PM)MikeinMKE Wrote:  I made out with her at the end and she moaned before I retreated from her beater car into my $50,000 car. It was a weeknight and I had a 6AM wake up bomb the next morning.

1) She could have begged off for lots of reasons, most of which have nothing to do with you and your performance. You might be "too good" for her.

2) Making a chick moan means nothing.
If you've never fucked a wife or someone else's girlfriend, realize that rubbing the clit provokes a biological response - one that does not bind her soul to your cock forever and ever.

3) In terms of your game/outlook
- had the pussy on the pedestal
- assumed that you'd built enough interest
- chose your life over fucking her

Sometimes that's an alpha move, but you've got to be able to be okay with the consequences of your actions, even if you don't get everything you want.

WIA

Post: #5

Post: #6

(10-29-2013 09:07 PM)MikeinMKE Wrote:  I should be an alpha caveman who rejects her b/c I'm higher on the value scale, not the wimpering pussy who is sad because I loved our time together and our connection.

This expectation of how you think you ought to feel is what's causing you pain, dude.

I know you still FEEL it, nothing to be done about that; it sucks and I hear you. But maybe it's a good opportunity to reframe the shock and reset your expectations.

Value exists across many dimensions, including wealth and success and all the stuff you mentioned as being relatively high to her.

But there's also pure chemistry, which both people need to experience...

You also seem hung up on relative value i.e. "I'm above her, she's below me. I'm more valuable; she's less valuable." And that could be coming through in a condescending vibe you're not aware of.

If I may make a suggestion: text her and ask her straight up. I do this all the time and it's great at alleviating anxiety and racking your brain as to what went wrong.

Ask her: "Hey...we had such a great a connection. I'm bummed you don't want to explore it but I understand. But I'm also really curious what went through your mind when you made your decision. Would you mind explaining it a bit for me?"

Post: #7

Usually the problem with naturals is that they are not used to rejection and thus experience meltdowns when subpar chicks reject them. I don't know if that's true for you though.

Post: #8

If you really fucked 30 girls this year, I don't know why you would care. You should have enough experience not to give a fuck about these little things. She didn't feel a connection between you two, so what? Why should you care?

If i were you, I would simply move on. I am in a stage where I have been flaked so much that a new flake (notice that I don't call it rejection) wouldn't bother me at all. I simply move on as if nothing never happened.

All women have different tastes, maybe she has a thing for lame, unsuccessful guys, who knows it. Always be ok with rejections, never get emotional about it.

Post: #9

You put her on a pedestal and now you're suffering because of it.

Snoop said it in '94. We don't love these hoes.

Post: #10

(10-30-2013 04:00 AM)VincentVinturi Wrote:  If I may make a suggestion: text her and ask her straight up. I do this all the time and it's great at alleviating anxiety and racking your brain as to what went wrong.

Texting should never be used to ask someone something "straight up".

But that is just my opinion.

Quote:Ask her: "Hey...we had such a great a connection. I'm bummed you don't want to explore it but I understand. But I'm also really curious what went through your mind when you made your decision. Would you mind explaining it a bit for me?"

Do you think a girl is really going to give you a correct and honest answer to this?

Over Text?

Why would one even care?

Next.

Post: #11

(10-30-2013 06:19 AM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  Texting should never be used to ask someone something "straight up".

But that is just my opinion.

I agree as a general rule, but in this case, it's over between Mike and the girl.

So might as well get some valuable feedback. Nothing to lose there and something to gain.

Post: #12

Don't give up on her. They can change their mind as fast as the wind blows.

Use all of your commonalitites and things in common to create a game plan to re-engage her.

Violin, artsy movies, etc. You have some insight that can help you spark emotions and feelings in her heart.

Why give up? Go at her even harder!

If you want her, keep after her, sometimes, we can just wear them down and force them to like us. Lol! That sounds crazy but I've seen it happen.

Help her to see why you two should be together. Guide her towards the vision.

Get creative, take a chance. You have nothing to lose at this point.

Maybe she was in a weird mood. Try again.

I like these challenges.

Post: #13

Maybe she knew you were too good for her.

So instead of waiting for you to break it off she decided to do it to keep her self intact.

Post: #14

In my years of experiences, both LTRs, hundreds of ONSs and everything in between, I've learned that if you have to CONVINCE a girl in the beginning especially, then you're wasting your precious time.

Next her.

Post: #15

All the "convincing" happens in the first second or two.

Everything else after that is bullshit and games.

A girl sees you and that's it. That's why we play "the game"

We know it's pretense, but we have to make sure the girl's cavewoman instincts don't kick-in and she doesn't feel like a slut.

Post: #16

(10-30-2013 02:46 PM)VincentVinturi Wrote:  

(10-30-2013 06:19 AM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  Texting should never be used to ask someone something "straight up".

But that is just my opinion.

I agree as a general rule, but in this case, it's over between Mike and the girl.

So might as well get some valuable feedback. Nothing to lose there and something to gain.

That just isn't true. It is certainly possible (likely IMO) for her to give him misinformation to avoid an awkward situation.

Not to mention she may (likely again IMO) then tell her friends about the simp she blew off who is now begging her for advice and is being a "creep" who can't let it go, poisoning that potential "well" too.

Post: #17

(10-30-2013 06:11 PM)Seaver Wrote:  

(10-30-2013 02:46 PM)VincentVinturi Wrote:  

(10-30-2013 06:19 AM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  Texting should never be used to ask someone something "straight up".

But that is just my opinion.

I agree as a general rule, but in this case, it's over between Mike and the girl.

So might as well get some valuable feedback. Nothing to lose there and something to gain.

That just isn't true. It is certainly possible (likely IMO) for her to give him misinformation to avoid an awkward situation.

Not to mention she may (likely again IMO) then tell her friends about the simp she blew off who is now begging her for advice and is being a "creep" who can't let it go, poisoning that potential "well" too.

I've never had this happen, ever. Women gladly respond, and with brutal honesty if you ask for it. Ask the question, get the feedback, learn something and move on. You're not mailing her a survey.

There was a period of about a year straight where I'd ask women for feedback on absolutely everything, even before I banged them.

And it never poisoned me to any of her friends so I don't know if you're speaking theoretically here or from actual experience...? I know where my info is coming from.

I learned more in that year than all of the reading and forums and whatever else, combined.

A woman will tell you exactly what you did to turn her on/off, why she didn't text, why things fizzled out, etc.

Trying to save face when a potential bang has already clearly gone south is useless pride IMO. It's better to get some DATA and find out what actually went through her mind. This prevents you from torturing yourself with erroneous explanations and from repeating your mistakes, because you'll know what the mistake was.

A veteran player wouldn't NEED to do this because he'd likely already know where he fucked up. But this is the newbie forum and I'm responding with that in mind.

Post: #18

What you're experiencing is normal op. You experienced oneitis...happens to everyone. you're hurt because your imagination didn't match with reality.


Don't go after her, it won't work.

Post: #19

this is how i got rejected last night:

this bish is giving me eyes and everything and i am right by her booth. her fat cougar friend keeps on hitting on me making it impossible to talk to her.
anyways later she starts dancing right next to me. asfar as i know, that an IOI. i open with something stupid, then she responds i say something logical. hence killin the vibe . so she is leaning in to respond and i touch her on the lower back and she goes -"dont touch me" - sternly. i didnt know what to do. this is by far the hardest rejection ive got. what i did was look in the other direction because it was brutal . But heres the thing, i regained my composure in less than 5 minutes and just had a smile onmy face. i was still hanging out by my booth and she comes by and starts dancing right next to me again.
i didnt open again tho.

the best case scenario would have been responding with something liek " i am just being freiendly ,dont get the wrong idea or somethign"

but just feel the rejection in its entirety for the frst 2 3 minutes then move on.

Post: #20

You say you take rejection way too hard. I don't believe you.

Let me tell you a story about a boy in elementary school who wrote a short note to his crush, a girl he found uniquely attractive and who he thought should like him back.

This boy wrote in the note that he liked her and asked if she liked him. In the post script he added the request, "please don't show this to anyone."

The girl opened the note during a group project and read it, the boy watched out of the corner of his eye. Then she laughed as she showed the note to each one of her group project partners and they all laughed at the boy as he felt the utmost rejection.

It took this boy well after high school and even nearly college age in order to recover from that rejection and figure out that rejection doesn't matter, that rejection will happen at all times, that rejection is no failure, it is just practice for success. This boy grew into a man the more he cast aside his irrational fear of rejection.

That fear of rejection that imprisoned the boy was almost entirely self-made and self-fulfilled.

That boy was me.

Post: #21

I cried

Post: #22

(10-29-2013 09:07 PM)MikeinMKE Wrote:  I am okay when a 10 who's dated college football players and NHL players blows me off. I get it. But a quirky 7 who I found endearing and really liked and had genuinely great conversation with? Sucks. I don't get it. I thought GIRLS were the romantic ones - the emotional ones who valued conversation and common interests and witty banter more than guys did. I should be an alpha caveman who rejects her b/c I'm higher on the value scale, not the wimpering pussy who is sad because I loved our time together and our connection.

Obvious one-itis for her. All men have it, I don't believe it's a weakness I believe one-itis is within every man. I use it as my lifeline back to my feelings for women.

I am a total sociopath/narcisist where American women are concerned. I didn't just take the red pill when I woke up, I take about 10-12 red pills a day. Around American women I am practically A-sexual, but I easily get attached to any girls I meet from eastern Europe.

I welcome the feeling of one-itis, and so should you. It is our lifeline back to our humanity, our soul and emotions in this vapid see of vanity. Maybe southern California has jaded me. But I am addicted to the Red Pill, it helps me stay sane in my environment, but one-itis is necessary , without it I would be a complete dark-triad