Post: #1

http://www.businessinsider.com/the-gsele...man-2013-9

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We’ve all seen and perhaps grown tired of guides and lists that are ripe with tedious clichés and full of humdrum regurgitated meme wisdom.

For that very reason, @GSElevator — in collaboration with John Carney (@Carney)— presents a fresh and hopefully thoughtful look at what it means to be a man today.

Stop talking about where you went to college.

Always carry cash. Keep some in your front pocket.

Rebel from business casual. Burn your khakis and wear a suit or jeans.

It’s okay to trade the possibility of your 80s and 90s for more guaranteed fun in your 20s and 30s.

The best public restrooms are in hotels: The St. Regis in New York, Claridge’s in London, The Fullerton in Singapore, to name a few.

Never stay out after midnight three nights in a row… Unless something really good comes up on the third night.

You will regret your tattoos.

Never date an ex of your friend.

Join Twitter; become your own curator of information.

If riding the bus doesn't incentivize you to improve your station in life, nothing will.

Time is too short to do your own laundry. 


When the bartender asks, you should already know what you want to drink.

If you perspire, wear a damn undershirt.

You don’t have to like baseball, but you should understand the concept of what a pitcher’s ERA means. Approach life similarly.

When people don’t invite you to a party, you really shouldn’t go.
 And sometimes even when you are invited, you shouldn’t go.
 


People are tired of you being the funny, drunk guy. 


When in doubt, always kiss the girl.

Tip more than you should.

You probably use your cell phone too often and at the wrong moments.


Buy expensive sunglasses. Superficial? Yes, but so are the women judging you. And it tells these women you appreciate nice things and are responsible enough not to lose them.

If you want a nice umbrella, bring a sh*tty one to church.

Do 50 push-ups, sit-ups, and dips before you shower each morning. 


Eat brunch with friends at least every other weekend. Leave Rusty and Junior at home.

Be a regular at more than one bar.

Act like you’ve been there before. It doesn’t matter if it’s in the end zone at the Super Bowl or on a private plane.

A glass of wine or two with lunch will not ruin your day.


It’s better if old men cut your hair. Ask for Sammy at the Mandarin Oriental Barbershop in Hong Kong. He can share his experiences of the Japanese occupation, or just give you a copy of Playboy.

Learn how to fly-fish.

No selfies. Aspire to experience photo-worthy moments in the company of a beautiful woman.

Own a handcrafted shotgun. It’s a beautiful thing.

There’s always another level. Just be content knowing that you are still better off than most who have ever lived.

You can get away with a lot more if you're the one buying the drinks.

Ask for a salad instead of fries.


Don’t split a check.

Pretty women who are unaccompanied want you to talk to them.

Cobblers will save your shoes. So will shoe trees.

When a bartender buys you a round, tip double. 



The cliché is that having money is about not wasting time. But in reality, money is about facilitating spontaneity.

Be spontaneous.

Find a Times New Roman in the streets and a Wingdings in the sheets. She exists.

Piercings are liabilities in fights. 


Do not use an electric razor. 


Desserts are for women. Order one and pretend you don’t mind that she’s eating yours.


Buy a tuxedo before you are thirty. Stay that size.


One girlfriend at a time is probably enough.


#StopItWithTheHastags

Your ties should be rolled and placed in a sectioned tie drawer. 


Throw parties. 
But have someone else clean up the next day.

You may only request one song from the DJ. 


Measure yourself only against your previous self.

Take more pictures. With a camera.

Place-dropping is worse than-name dropping.


When you admire the work of artists or writers, tell them. 
And spend money to acquire their work. 



Your clothes do not match. They go together. 


Yes, of course you have to buy her dinner. 


Staying angry is a waste of energy.


Revenge can be a good way of getting over anger. 



If she expects the person you are 20% of the time, 100% of the time, then she doesn't want you.

Always bring a bottle of something to the party.



Avoid that “last” whiskey. You’ve probably had enough. 


Don’t use the word “closure” or ever expect it in real life. There may still be a mortally wounded Russian mobster roaming the woods of south Jersey, but we’ll never know.

If you are wittier than you are handsome, avoid loud clubs. 


Drink outdoors.
 And during the day.
 And sometimes by yourself.

Date women outside your social set. You’ll be surprised.


If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone. 


You cannot have a love affair with whiskey because whiskey will never love you back.


Feigning unpretentiousness is worse than being pretentious. Cut it out with the vintage Polo and that ’83 Wagoneer in Nantucket.

The New Yorker is not high-brow. Neither is The Economist. 


If you believe in evolution, you should know something about how it works.

No-one cares if you are offended, so stop it. 


Never take an ex back. She tried to do better and is settling with you.

Eating out alone can be magnificent. Find a place where you can sit at the bar.

Read more. It allows you to borrow someone else’s brain, and will make you more interesting at a dinner party – provided that you don’t initiate conversation with, “So, who are you reading…”

Ignore the boos. They usually come from the cheap seats.

Hookers aren’t cool, but remember, the free ones are a lot more expensive.

Don’t ever say, “it is what it is.”

Start a wine collection for your kids when they are born. Add a few cases every year without telling them. It’ll make a phenomenal gift in twenty years.

Don’t gamble if losing $100 is going to piss you off.

Remember, “rules are for the obedience of fools and the guidance of wise men.”

Post: #2

Funny, a lot of that is classic "bro".

Goldman Goldman Goldman. Gotta love 'em.

Post: #3

Good collection of platitudes. Not sure what it has to do with "being a man" though. Most are nice to live by.

It kind of reminds me of one of those silly gift books somebody gave me when I graduated high school, about how to live a great life. Most of them were great platitudes, but some were off the wall. One was "never own a boat". That's more the author's preference or experience than a rule for a great life.

Like in this one, what does "bring a shitty umbrella to church" have to do with being a man?

Post: #4

I agree with most of those (LOL'd at one about whores too), but I don't understand how this is related to Goldman Sachs.

Post: #5

Looks like a list to help gooseballs get less goosey.

Post: #6

Quote:Don’t ever say, “it is what it is.”

Paging WestCoast

Post: #7

(09-11-2013 11:40 AM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  I agree with most of those (LOL'd at one about whores too), but I don't understand how this is related to Goldman Sachs.

If you haven't read the withering article that labeled GS a "vampire squid" you should.

http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/new...e-20100405

GS has run with it brilliantly, used it for more pop publicity while they quietly spend a lot reshaping their image as they prepare to steal more. Do you know what "front-running" is?

Then when you watch Youtube videos you will be shocked how many, many ads are feel-good brainwashing talking about GS microfunding woman startups in India, all probably true but also a complete red herring.

The Vampire Squid article outlines how they've been stealing money from the people of the world through their crony connections for something like 100 years.

The Youtube stuff contrasted with the article give the best lesson I've seen at how the Matrix/Combine/Techno-Power/Big Brother anesthetizes everyone (with the Best Mad men talent who are smarter than anybody at this) as they steal your labor and take more and more of the pie.

They then rent their increased share of the pie back out to you for more of your labor. You'll have to work extra unbilled hours this week, things are rough and money is tight.

From the article:
If America is circling the drain, Goldman Sachs has found a way to be that drain — an extremely unfortunate loophole in the system of Western democratic capitalism, which never foresaw that in a society governed passively by free markets and free elections, organized greed always defeats disorganized democracy.

--Please notice that my warning level stays at or above zero-- most others have no warning level! I am always on probation.

Post: #8

(09-11-2013 11:37 AM)emuelle1 Wrote:  One was "never own a boat".

That is based on the rule if you want to be rich abide by the 3 Fs. If it flies, floats, or fornicates don't buy it, rent it.

Post: #9

Quote:Never take an ex back. She tried to do better and is settling with you.

I have tried to voice this sentiment so many times over the years, but have failed to say it in so few words.

Post: #10

The first rule.

Stop talking about where you went to college.

Either this was not written by someone from Goldman Sachs or no one listens to it because when you meet a banker you can count the seconds until they start talking credentials.

Post: #11

Man people dont get it at all they actually believe all the quotes from GS elevator gossip come from GS. I bet people think that the main blogger in an "investment banker" as well.

GS elevator gossip is an entertainment platform. This shit is seriously on my nerves now people talk a lot about finance and the economy when they don't know anything about it.

Hint guys he says "Bloomberg viral" many times.

Actually here is a fact, if someone is "impressed" by the names Goldman and Morgan they don't know anything about Wall Street.

Post: #12

Some good ones, my fav ones:

"Read more. It allows you to borrow someone else’s brain, and will make you more interesting at a dinner party – provided that you don’t initiate conversation with, “So, who are you reading…”

"Start a wine collection for your kids when they are born. Add a few cases every year without telling them. It’ll make a phenomenal gift in twenty years."

Post: #13

the best one was the sopranos reference

Post: #14

there are some decent tips in that list, its worth your time to read them and make up your own mind.

Post: #15

Very nice list

Post: #16

@YMG

Thank you for sharing!!

Awesome list.

Post: #17

They forgot to add pocketing politicians and financing wars. Power is what makes a man not rolling up ties.

Post: #18

Please don't click through that link. Don't give the assholes at Business Insider any traffic after the way they treated Pax Dickinson.

Post: #19

interesting list, cheers mate

Post: #20

GS elevator has some classic material you can implement into your game.

For example one of my recent favorites:

"You're not on Facebook? All your high school friends must think your you're dead!"

"Nah, I'm sure they've google me."

Post: #21

Interview with the GSE tweeter who came up with the list:

http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/09/goldman-...tter_nymag

Post: #22

+ suck wealth the middle class while destroying middle class jobs
+ make derivatives to profit from it
+ yes, hookers blow and yachts will make it all feel better

manly? far from it buddy.

Post: #23

I've read the list, it's pretty good in terms of manly advice. The guy's twitter is also pretty funny in its own right.

Post: #24

One thing I would add is to never give advice or explain how you are able to do certain things to anyone,

with the exception that they ask, and even then only if you know they are really interested or motivated.