Post: #4776

God damn, I've hit a big-time rut in the last few months. I haven't been approaching and I've been too reliant on online sources. I've been doing too much reading and not enough doing.

I'm starting to think that online is so biased towards women, as they are receiving tens of messages a day, that for most guys its your worst bet for a steady return. There's no way to use attributes like body language, dress, and talking. The only fix is to approach face to face.

Out now running solo. Why not start right away.

Post: #4777

^since we're on the topic of online dating, I'll mention the tinder date I went on tonight.

Got freaking SIF'ed. Ought to be some kind of policing against it. One drink and I was out. She wasn't obsese but damn sure too chubby and unattractive by far for me. I don't know how she pulled off her profile pics.

It was a bit embarrassing being seen with her. Thankfully it was older people there and no one I knew.

I'm supposed to have a second tinder date with another girl...an attractive one....that I saw last week. Heavy sexual vibe on the last one and she texted me yesterday which is best day for me to meet this week....so, online's not all bad here lately. But tonight, yeah.

Post: #4778

Does anyone else think the "game" is requiring more and more effort each day? For the seasoned United States vets, I bet the past 6 months to 1 year has been the worst in ROI in years. Am i correct? I mean, someone is definitely smashing these 8s+ since every once in a while you would see them get knocked up. I feel bad for the amount of work the men have to put in with to even be considered by these 8s+. I am just not willing to treat the "game" as a 40 hour/week job. That's the amount of effort it takes for even meager amounts of success, at least in my town. I got 3 notches for 2015, thanks to tourists visiting on holidays for 2 out of 3. Perhaps I should shift my focus to tourists.

Post: #4779

You definitely should. I live in a beach resort town and focus most of my efforts on tourists between April and September. It's easy pussy if you know how to work the game.

Post: #4780

It was all in the bag tonight....

19 year old 6.5 Tinder girl, texted back and forth.

She drives 30 minutes to come see me even after I'm a half an hour late.

She shows up, she's got a cute face, could lose weight of course.

We bullshit a bit, talk about our pasts, things we've gotten in trouble before.

Talk about film, editing, music.

After 30 minutes of being with eachother, I suggest we see a Tarantino flick at my place over beers.

I put a condom in my pocket when I get to my car...

She follows me to my house, I tease her about her car, I grab the six pack in the fridge, I show off my vinyls, my rifle, movies, books.

Throw on the Tarantino flick, pop open a pair of beers, holy shit she can drink fast, I'm teasing her ever so often, do the old wrap my arm around her.

We're vibing, she smells great, I tease her to be good or else.

I tell her to shutup then start making out with her, immediately her biology kicks in, soft moans, bites on my lip, she caresses me with her arms.

I start grabbing her ass and her bra, she's more into it, she's humping my leg.

I reach underneath her bra and play with nipples, I ended up taking her top off all the way to where it's stuck on one arm.

I start sucking on her nipples, unbutton her pants and rub her clit, she's liking every minute of it.

I move her on top of me.

Then this happens...

She says, "I don't think this a good idea, I don't think I should have sex with you", as she rolls over to my side.

I play it cool and say, "Don't even trip, it's no big deal, we'll just chill out and watch the rest of the movie"

She says, "I need to go, I really need to go"

Thoughts of False Rape Accusations run through my head.

I say, "It's cool, why are you tripping"

She says, "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"

Thoughts her being crazy, possibly stage 5, possibly bi-polar, I'm frantically thinking how to defeat this LMR.

I crack a smile and say, "I'm not expecting anything, I'm not even worried about this, it's all good, just chill out, you're overthinking this WAY too much"

She says "no I know I'll regret this, I'm trying not be a slut anymore and be good, it's just going to make me sad, I sleep with guys to make me feel good about myself."

I shrug it off and say "I'm not open to judging you at all, it's seriously not a big deal, don't worry, let's just finish the rest of this movie"

She says, "can you show me the door to your garage, I really need to go" in this dead pan semi serious voice.

Her voice is a bit shaky but funny.

I walk her to the garage, she puts on her shoes, I'm just still reeling that this is actually happening.

"Well, it was nice meeting you, I'm sorry I just can't do this, I know how I'm going to feel"

I crack another smile, "well it's not like you're going to talk to me after this anyways"

She shrugs and says, "yeah". Gives me a hug, then goes for the kiss, I throw one last ditch passionate kiss.

For a moment....I had her back....the passion was there. She forced herself to pull away knowing what would happen.

"Well bye." She says after walking away.

I close the garage.

This has been the first time in my life, that a girl has literally walked out of my room right before sex and left me.


After-Thoughts...

All the green lights were there, maybe I blitzkrieged too fast this time, maybe not.

I'm not bummed about this since it wasn't an 8 or 9 that I lost, this was more like a new notch to keep my libido going.

I'm not taking it personal, girls aren't rational creatures, who knows what she was thinking, maybe I was just too good at my game and she knew what was up.

For all I know I could've dodged a bullet.

I'm not sure if I just didn't game her accordingly OR if I just need to charge this to the game.

Either way, it's done and over with and I've got 2 more dates lined up this week.

Any input and feedback is always appreciated !

Maybe I really am burned out and in a possibly slump, even IF i'm getting dates and IOI's. Maybe I'm not really 100%.

Onto the next one...

Post: #4781

Edit - Delete

Post: #4782

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  It was all in the bag tonight....

19 year old 6.5 Tinder girl, texted back and forth.

She drives 30 minutes to come see me even after I'm a half an hour late.

She shows up, she's got a cute face, could lose weight of course.

We bullshit a bit, talk about our pasts, things we've gotten in trouble before.

Talk about film, editing, music.

After 30 minutes of being with eachother, I suggest we see a Tarantino flick at my place over beers.

I put a condom in my pocket when I get to my car...

She follows me to my house, I tease her about her car, I grab the six pack in the fridge, I show off my vinyls, my rifle, movies, books.

Throw on the Tarantino flick, pop open a pair of beers, holy shit she can drink fast, I'm teasing her ever so often, do the old wrap my arm around her.

We're vibing, she smells great, I tease her to be good or else.

I tell her to shutup then start making out with her, immediately her biology kicks in, soft moans, bites on my lip, she caresses me with her arms.

I start grabbing her ass and her bra, she's more into it, she's humping my leg.

I reach underneath her bra and play with nipples, I ended up taking her top off all the way to where it's stuck on one arm.

I start sucking on her nipples, unbutton her pants and rub her clit, she's liking every minute of it.

I move her on top of me.

Then this happens...

She says, "I don't think this a good idea, I don't think I should have sex with you", as she rolls over to my side.

I play it cool and say, "Don't even trip, it's no big deal, we'll just chill out and watch the rest of the movie"

She says, "I need to go, I really need to go"

Thoughts of False Rape Accusations run through my head.

I say, "It's cool, why are you tripping"

She says, "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"

Thoughts her being crazy, possibly stage 5, possibly bi-polar, I'm frantically thinking how to defeat this LMR.

I crack a smile and say, "I'm not expecting anything, I'm not even worried about this, it's all good, just chill out, you're overthinking this WAY too much"

She says "no I know I'll regret this, I'm trying not be a slut anymore and be good, it's just going to make me sad, I sleep with guys to make me feel good about myself."

I shrug it off and say "I'm not open to judging you at all, it's seriously not a big deal, don't worry, let's just finish the rest of this movie"

She says, "can you show me the door to your garage, I really need to go" in this dead pan semi serious voice.

Her voice is a bit shaky but funny.

I walk her to the garage, she puts on her shoes, I'm just still reeling that this is actually happening.

"Well, it was nice meeting you, I'm sorry I just can't do this, I know how I'm going to feel"

I crack another smile, "well it's not like you're going to talk to me after this anyways"

She shrugs and says, "yeah". Gives me a hug, then goes for the kiss, I throw one last ditch passionate kiss.

For a moment....I had her back....the passion was there. She forced herself to pull away knowing what would happen.

"Well bye." She says after walking away.

I close the garage.

This has been the first time in my life, that a girl has literally walked out of my room right before sex and left me.


After-Thoughts...

All the green lights were there, maybe I blitzkrieged too fast this time, maybe not.

I'm not bummed about this since it wasn't an 8 or 9 that I lost, this was more like a new notch to keep my libido going.

I'm not taking it personal, girls aren't rational creatures, who knows what she was thinking, maybe I was just too good at my game and she knew what was up.

For all I know I could've dodged a bullet.

I'm not sure if I just didn't game her accordingly OR if I just need to charge this to the game.

Either way, it's done and over with and I've got 2 more dates lined up this week.

Any input and feedback is always appreciated !

Maybe I really am burned out and in a possibly slump, even IF i'm getting dates and IOI's. Maybe I'm not really 100%.

Onto the next one...

I think sometimes in life there are situations that you cannot control, no matter how hard you try. There's no point in beating yourself up about it.

Probability suggests that, with the amount of girls you meet up with Kaotic, you're going to experience all sorts of strange things eventually.

The only thing you could have tried is the "I'm not letting you drive drunk, sleep on the couch" routine.

Charge it and and move on.

Post: #4783

I'm with CBW.

No matter how much one can prepare, there is always an element that cannot be controlled. Sounds like you executed everything down to the letter on your end, but you can't make the result certain. You can just increase your chances.

The flip side of this is also true. You could be out in your dishevelled clothes after a long day at work, and a girl could open you up with the express desire to bang. Those lay ups are rare but do happen. When we deal with the wild card that are women, anything can happen.

Post: #4784

Quote:All the green lights were there, maybe I blitzkrieged too fast this time, maybe not.

I'm not bummed about this since it wasn't an 8 or 9 that I lost, this was more like a new notch to keep my libido going.

I'm not taking it personal, girls aren't rational creatures, who knows what she was thinking, maybe I was just too good at my game and she knew what was up.

For all I know I could've dodged a bullet.

I'm not sure if I just didn't game her accordingly OR if I just need to charge this to the game.

She actually told you everything you needed to know:
1. "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"
2. "I sleep with guys to make me feel good about myself."

This girl has major self esteem problems, definitely not healthy...that's why she started freaking out and going out of control into a guilt-shame sprial...possibly even some emotional abuse early on in her life.

Healthy girls sleep with guys they like and don't have any shame issues because they naturally feel good about themselves
and their self esteem doesn't tear them down from the inside.

A lot of girls also have body issues, which can also contribute to a destructive sense of self worth or shame.

Post: #4785

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  It was all in the bag tonight....

19 year old 6.5 Tinder girl, texted back and forth.

She drives 30 minutes to come see me even after I'm a half an hour late.

She shows up, she's got a cute face, could lose weight of course.

We bullshit a bit, talk about our pasts, things we've gotten in trouble before.

Talk about film, editing, music.

After 30 minutes of being with eachother, I suggest we see a Tarantino flick at my place over beers.

I put a condom in my pocket when I get to my car...

She follows me to my house, I tease her about her car, I grab the six pack in the fridge, I show off my vinyls, my rifle, movies, books.

Throw on the Tarantino flick, pop open a pair of beers, holy shit she can drink fast, I'm teasing her ever so often, do the old wrap my arm around her.

We're vibing, she smells great, I tease her to be good or else.

I tell her to shutup then start making out with her, immediately her biology kicks in, soft moans, bites on my lip, she caresses me with her arms.

I start grabbing her ass and her bra, she's more into it, she's humping my leg.

I reach underneath her bra and play with nipples, I ended up taking her top off all the way to where it's stuck on one arm.

I start sucking on her nipples, unbutton her pants and rub her clit, she's liking every minute of it.

I move her on top of me.

Then this happens...

She says, "I don't think this a good idea, I don't think I should have sex with you", as she rolls over to my side.

I play it cool and say, "Don't even trip, it's no big deal, we'll just chill out and watch the rest of the movie"

She says, "I need to go, I really need to go"

Thoughts of False Rape Accusations run through my head.

I say, "It's cool, why are you tripping"

She says, "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"

Thoughts her being crazy, possibly stage 5, possibly bi-polar, I'm frantically thinking how to defeat this LMR.

I crack a smile and say, "I'm not expecting anything, I'm not even worried about this, it's all good, just chill out, you're overthinking this WAY too much"

She says "no I know I'll regret this, I'm trying not be a slut anymore and be good, it's just going to make me sad, I sleep with guys to make me feel good about myself."

I shrug it off and say "I'm not open to judging you at all, it's seriously not a big deal, don't worry, let's just finish the rest of this movie"

She says, "can you show me the door to your garage, I really need to go" in this dead pan semi serious voice.

Her voice is a bit shaky but funny.

I walk her to the garage, she puts on her shoes, I'm just still reeling that this is actually happening.

"Well, it was nice meeting you, I'm sorry I just can't do this, I know how I'm going to feel"

I crack another smile, "well it's not like you're going to talk to me after this anyways"

She shrugs and says, "yeah". Gives me a hug, then goes for the kiss, I throw one last ditch passionate kiss.

For a moment....I had her back....the passion was there. She forced herself to pull away knowing what would happen.

"Well bye." She says after walking away.

I close the garage.

This has been the first time in my life, that a girl has literally walked out of my room right before sex and left me.


After-Thoughts...

All the green lights were there, maybe I blitzkrieged too fast this time, maybe not.

I'm not bummed about this since it wasn't an 8 or 9 that I lost, this was more like a new notch to keep my libido going.

I'm not taking it personal, girls aren't rational creatures, who knows what she was thinking, maybe I was just too good at my game and she knew what was up.

For all I know I could've dodged a bullet.

I'm not sure if I just didn't game her accordingly OR if I just need to charge this to the game.

Either way, it's done and over with and I've got 2 more dates lined up this week.

Any input and feedback is always appreciated !

Maybe I really am burned out and in a possibly slump, even IF i'm getting dates and IOI's. Maybe I'm not really 100%.

Onto the next one...

It sucks she had to have her "I don't want to be a slut anymore" epiphany on your watch.

Maybe drop her a "I care" text in a month or so. Eg:

"Hey, I hope everything's going good with you" or "Hey, how you been" or "Hey...I saw ( something you and her joked about / inside joke) today....thought I'd say hello."

Hail Mary's work from time to time...

Post: #4786

(03-11-2015 03:25 AM)CrashBangWallop Wrote:  I think sometimes in life there are situations that you cannot control, no matter how hard you try. There's no point in beating yourself up about it.

Probability suggests that, with the amount of girls you meet up with Kaotic, you're going to experience all sorts of strange things eventually.

The only thing you could have tried is the "I'm not letting you drive drunk, sleep on the couch" routine.

Charge it and and move on.

I didn't necessarily beat myself up about it was more along the lines of...uh wtf just happened ? I was analyzing leaks in my game which seemed pretty airtight, then I realized this was all on her.

She only had 1 beer, I was more paranoid of her flipping out on me towards the end. So let her eject.

(03-11-2015 06:51 AM)Frontenac Wrote:  I'm with CBW.

No matter how much one can prepare, there is always an element that cannot be controlled. Sounds like you executed everything down to the letter on your end, but you can't make the result certain. You can just increase your chances.

The flip side of this is also true. You could be out in your dishevelled clothes after a long day at work, and a girl could open you up with the express desire to bang. Those lay ups are rare but do happen. When we deal with the wild card that are women, anything can happen.

Yeah if you remember, a few months ago, I had a solid 8 MILF in my bed and didn't make a fucking move, I remember that mistake as we layed down last night so I made an aggressive move on her and went from there.

Yup this was definitely a wild card, first one I've been dealt with in a long time.

(03-11-2015 07:46 AM)Apollo21 Wrote:  She actually told you everything you needed to know:
1. "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"
2. "I sleep with guys to make me feel good about myself."

This girl has major self esteem problems, definitely not healthy...that's why she started freaking out and going out of control into a guilt-shame sprial...possibly even some emotional abuse early on in her life.

Healthy girls sleep with guys they like and don't have any shame issues because they naturally feel good about themselves
and their self esteem doesn't tear them down from the inside.

A lot of girls also have body issues, which can also contribute to a destructive sense of self worth or shame.

You're absolutely right, she was NOT in a healthy state of mind, I was replaying what she said in my head, while I was driving to work.

The more and more it makes sense, there must've been some serious shit that went on beforehand.

Who knows, I'm actually glad we didn't bang, who knows what she would of done when she was all depressed after we banged.

(03-11-2015 08:58 AM)robreke Wrote:  It sucks she had to have her "I don't want to be a slut anymore" epiphany on your watch.

Maybe drop her a "I care" text in a month or so. Eg:

"Hey, I hope everything's going good with you" or "Hey, how you been" or "Hey...I saw ( something you and her joked about / inside joke) today....thought I'd say hello."

Hail Mary's work from time to time...

I've had one girl whose said that to me before, but she didn't up and leave which was cool.

Honestly, it's not even worth a follow up text, she even said she isn't going to talk to me anymore, I've just written this off.

Hopefully I can redeem myself in the next few days.

Post: #4787

^^Kaotic I hate to say it, but it sounds like your made some mistakes here.

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  girls aren't rational creatures

So then why did you engage her rationally?

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  who knows what she was thinking,

Why would it matter what she's thinking? What's important is what she's FEELING.

In your case she was feeling both horny and nervous, but instead of addressing those feelings you tried to defuse the sexual tension using logic.

Big mistake.

Logic is the opposite of seduction. Don't use logic on a girl you want to seduce!

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  Thoughts of False Rape Accusations run through my head.

Come on, man. You got to stop reading the "Everything Else" section of the RVF so much.

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  She says, "I don't think this a good idea, I don't think I should have sex with you", as she rolls over to my side.

"Yeah you're right, this is a terrible idea."

Then pull her hair back hard and kiss her neck, and keep telling her what a bad idea it is that you're putting your finger in her mouth, and your tongue on her nipples...

or

"That's good, I don't want to have sex with you anyway."

Then get up and go do something else. Or keep kissing her. Both work.

or

"We don't have to have sex, but I like kissing you. Do you like kissing me?"

(this one seems basic but it has gotten me laid many times. Takes her focus off of sex and puts it onto kissing.)

or

"Who said I wanted to have sex with you? I thought we were just having fun. Are you having fun with me?"

(same as above, get her to respond positively and it frames the situation positively in her head.)

or

"You're funny. I'm going to make a drink, don't go anywhere until I come back."

etc.

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  She says, "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"

I crack a smile and say, "I'm not expecting anything, I'm not even worried about this, it's all good, just chill out, you're overthinking this WAY too much"

Wrong answer!

She straight up told you she was a slut but needed help rationalizing her desire to fuck you. Instead of giving her what she needed, you tried to defuse the situation, which confused her.

You really think she was at your house because she didn't want to fuck?

Imagine you tell a car salesman "I'm really not sure if I should buy this car, I've been trying to save money lately and I don't want to regret this purchase tomorrow."

You think he would crack a smile and say "I'm not worried, you're overthinking this too much, chill out."

Hell no! That would be a terrible salesman. So what would he do instead?

He'd start reminding you of the benefits of the car you're looking at. He'd ask you what questions you have about the car, and help you understand why this car is the best in its class. He'd make you qualify yourself as worthy of owning the car. He'd paint a picture for you of how that car would fit perfectly into your life, and how it would make your life better!

The LAST thing he would do is tell you to "chill out" or ask you "why are you tripping out about the price?"

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  I shrug it off and say "I'm not open to judging you at all, it's seriously not a big deal, don't worry, let's just finish the rest of this movie"

Sorry brother but I can smell the desperation from here.

You're a very good player but if this type of interaction is happening often, then you need to go back and look at some various tactics of seduction and sales.

Both are emotionally driven forms of persuasion. You are using too much logic and I can tell that you're inside your own head too much right now.

Perhaps take a break from the forum and the internet for a few days and allow your head to clear!

Post: #4788

(03-11-2015 11:28 AM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  ^^Kaotic I hate to say it, but it sounds like your made some mistakes here.

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  girls aren't rational creatures

So then why did you engage her rationally?

Definitely a mistake on my part. When I said that, that was in hindsight.

Quote:

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  who knows what she was thinking,

Why would it matter what she's thinking? What's important is what she's FEELING.

In your case she was feeling both horny and nervous, but instead of addressing those feelings you tried to defuse the sexual tension using logic.

Big mistake.

Logic is the opposite of seduction. Don't use logic on a girl you want to seduce!

Yup you're right again, logic is going to be a turn off, and it sure as hell was, it also didn't help she kept cutting me off.

Quote:

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  Thoughts of False Rape Accusations run through my head.

Come on, man. You got to stop reading the "Everything Else" section of the RVF so much.

Alot of shit was going through my head, she sounded super upset, so I freaked out a bit.

Quote:

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  She says, "I don't think this a good idea, I don't think I should have sex with you", as she rolls over to my side.

"Yeah you're right, this is a terrible idea."

Then pull her hair back hard and kiss her neck, and keep telling her what a bad idea it is that you're putting your finger in her mouth, and your tongue on her nipples...

or

"That's good, I don't want to have sex with you anyway."

Then get up and go do something else. Or keep kissing her. Both work.

or

"We don't have to have sex, but I like kissing you. Do you like kissing me?"

(this one seems basic but it has gotten me laid many times. Takes her focus off of sex and puts it onto kissing.)

or

"Who said I wanted to have sex with you? I thought we were just having fun. Are you having fun with me?"

(same as above, get her to respond positively and it frames the situation positively in her head.)

or

"You're funny. I'm going to make a drink, don't go anywhere until I come back."

etc.

When she first said she didn't think it was a good idea, she was on top of me, topless.

I kind of grunted, kept sucking on her nipples and kissing her. I didn't really give her any response. I also was pulling her as I was licking her nipps.

I could tell her hamster was fighting.

I should've said something cocky, laughed it off, or immediately stopped and froze her out.

I did tell her, we don't have to have sex.

This happened all in the same moment, she then rolled over and got up.

Quote:

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  She says, "because I'm trying to be good, I know I'm going to regret this and get depressed tommorow"

I crack a smile and say, "I'm not expecting anything, I'm not even worried about this, it's all good, just chill out, you're overthinking this WAY too much"

Wrong answer!

She straight up told you she was a slut but needed help rationalizing her desire to fuck you. Instead of giving her what she needed, you tried to defuse the situation, which confused her.

You really think she was at your house because she didn't want to fuck?

Imagine you tell a car salesman "I'm really not sure if I should buy this car, I've been trying to save money lately and I don't want to regret this purchase tomorrow."

You think he would crack a smile and say "I'm not worried, you're overthinking this too much, chill out."

Hell no! That would be a terrible salesman. So what would he do instead?

He'd start reminding you of the benefits of the car you're looking at. He'd ask you what questions you have about the car, and help you understand why this car is the best in its class. He'd make you qualify yourself as worthy of owning the car. He'd paint a picture for you of how that car would fit perfectly into your life, and how it would make your life better!

The LAST thing he would do is tell you to "chill out" or ask you "why are you tripping out about the price?"

That's a good salesman, but this isn't a rational conversation remember ?

The big problem was as she's telling me this she's getting dressed AND looking for her keys. By this time she's requested me twice to show her the door to the garage.

You talk about the benefits of the "car", having her qualify herself, etc.

What would you say to the girl ? How would you frame it ?

Quote:

(03-11-2015 01:49 AM)kaotic Wrote:  I shrug it off and say "I'm not open to judging you at all, it's seriously not a big deal, don't worry, let's just finish the rest of this movie"

Sorry brother but I can smell the desperation from here.

You're a very good player but if this type of interaction is happening often, then you need to go back and look at some various tactics of seduction and sales.

Both are emotionally driven forms of persuasion. You are using too much logic and I can tell that you're inside your own head too much right now.

Perhaps take a break from the forum and the internet for a few days and allow your head to clear!

It wasn't much desperation (which I do admit and realize some was there) as far as HOW to deal with rejection, which has RARELY happened to me when I've got a girl in bed.

Once I've got a girl in bed the bang is almost 100% guaranteed, I think I've had 1 other girl have the I'm not a slut realization.

So I honestly felt panicked and was doing damage control. A bit freaked out like I said.

The minute she rolled off me and was putting her bra on, is the minute I ejected and was just trying to soothe her hamster.

I need to learn how to deal with rejection in bed more, I also need to know how to react when a girl has the I don't want to be a slut anymore epiphany.

You can PM me more advice or put it on here for the other brothers to see if you'd like.

Post: #4789

(03-10-2015 11:22 PM)RougeNoir Wrote:  Does anyone else think the "game" is requiring more and more effort each day?

Not me.

"Game" is getting easier for me.

- I'm getting better girls with less effort.
- I'm learning how to better manage my "gaming" schedule.
- I'm learning which girls to spend time on and which girls to avoid.
- I have learned how to do multiple approaches in a short period of time.
- I have learned to only date girls that live within 10 minutes of my house.
- I have learned how to better "screen" for girls that sincerely like me.
- I have learned how avoid wasting time.
- I have learned to dress better, which brings better results with less effort.
- My Game is improving.
- I have learned how to better deal with the stress and pressure of Game.

Etc.

(03-10-2015 11:22 PM)RougeNoir Wrote:  Perhaps I should shift my focus to tourists.

Yes, of course you should.

Tourists are often open to quick sex.

Remember, it's not always necessarily about having good "game" -- Often times, it's MORE IMPORTANT TO HAVE AN EFFECTIVE STRATEGY!

Your skills are one thing.

Your strategy is something else.

Sometimes, strategy is more important than game.

---

Here is a story about a guy with bad game, but, a great strategy:

(02-15-2013 04:25 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  I once met a guy off this forum, I will not name names, he was shorter then me, not as good looking as me, skinnier then me, didn't dress as well as me, didn't have as good of hygiene as I did, etc, etc. His game was not great. The dude was like a 4 or 5. I am more like 6 or 7.

We got to talking. He was rich. I think he inherited a lot of real estate. He didn't have to work. He just traveled around the world banging women. I was jealous of him!

I had better game but he had a better LIFE!!!

It's not always who has the best game..IT'S WHO HAS THE BEST STRATEGY!

The full post is HERE:

Post: #4790

Boo! Keep it here. This is a great dialogue between Blurred and Kaotic.

Post: #4791

In response to game getting harder, it's just like money.

If you get a lot of cash, you will be happy, but it will depreciate according to inflation.

However, if you're smart and invest it, you will GAIN money off putting it into the market.

That's where traditional PUA guys fail - they approach a million girls but still have shitty lives. Their lifestyle does not pay dividends. For RVF, we look to make it easier in the long run by investing our time in fitness, hobbies, skills, travel, logistics, and other aspects of life that will improve our short term happiness AND our prospects of getting laid.

Post: #4792

Kaotic I've had situations like yours happen to me in the past so I'm learning from your experience and also the advice from BlurredSevens. My personality tends to gravitate towards defusing conflict so I would react in a similar way as you by trying to calm her down. A similar line to what Blurred wrote that has worked for me when I start to get LMR is I'll say something like "let's just make out". It sounds cheesy and jr. high but it gets their mind off of having sex. A final thought about LMR that has been working for me about 70% of the time is when they pull away or resist I'll completely change the subject and go back to talking about something we were discussing earlier. I don't know the psychology of why it works but my guess is that it's adding a lot of comfort putting them at ease while they're still incredibly horny. Keep up the good field reports Kaotic, this is by far my biggest game stumbling block...

Post: #4793

Had dinner with a plate today, her treat. However she wouldn't put out afterwards and wouldn't give me a reason why. I will have to instill some dread into her and then ask her wtf is up with her and sex(she seems generally not interested in it).

Post: #4794

(03-11-2015 01:39 PM)The Great Basilisk Wrote:  Had dinner with a plate today, her treat. However she wouldn't put out afterwards and wouldn't give me a reason why. I will have to instill some dread into her and then ask her wtf is up with her and sex(she seems generally not interested in it).

Don't jump the gun, but this can be a tell tale sign they're interested in or banging another dude.

Had it happen a few times. Their 'anti ho' mechanism makes them not to want to fuck/be with two guys at once.

Dread and perhaps go radio silent for no reason for a while.....hamster spin

Post: #4795

(03-10-2015 11:22 PM)RougeNoir Wrote:  Does anyone else think the "game" is requiring more and more effort each day? For the seasoned United States vets, I bet the past 6 months to 1 year has been the worst in ROI in years. Am i correct? I mean, someone is definitely smashing these 8s+ since every once in a while you would see them get knocked up. I feel bad for the amount of work the men have to put in with to even be considered by these 8s+. I am just not willing to treat the "game" as a 40 hour/week job. That's the amount of effort it takes for even meager amounts of success, at least in my town. I got 3 notches for 2015, thanks to tourists visiting on holidays for 2 out of 3. Perhaps I should shift my focus to tourists.

I use to live in Florida so from Feb-April I would get 75% of my bands from Soeing breakers.

Post: #4796

(03-11-2015 11:54 AM)kaotic Wrote:  The big problem was as she's telling me this she's getting dressed AND looking for her keys. By this time she's requested me twice to show her the door to the garage.

What would you say to the girl ? How would you frame it ?

I think by that point you had probably already lost her. But if she was on the verge of walking out, I probably would have tried to dramatically shift gears. Maybe say "let's go outside for a walk" or something. Get her mind off it and then try again in half an hour.

Hard to say without being there, though. Best bet is to have nipped that reaction in the bud, and never let it get to that point in the first place.

(03-11-2015 11:54 AM)kaotic Wrote:  That's a good salesman, but this isn't a rational conversation remember ?

You talk about the benefits of the "car", having her qualify herself, etc.

The sales examples appear rational/logical on the surface, but those techniques are designed to engage emotions and persuade a decision from the heart and not the mind.

---

Out of curiosity, which movie where you watching?

That might play a larger role in your game than you think.

- Violent movies make people feel defensive
- Scary movies make people feel edgy
- Comedies make people feel happy
- Romantic movies make people feel horny!

If you are showing your girl a Quentin Tarantino movie, chances are it affected her mood. His movies are designed to do so!

It's the same with music - you wouldn't play heavy metal or gangsta rap if you were trying to seduce a girl, even if you both like that genre. You would play something that is going to make her chill out.

The same goes with movies, food, locations, or whatever else you and the girl are surrounded with.

Cause and effect. People are heavily influenced by their environment.

If you want a girl to feel happy and open and relaxed, then you need to create an environment that stimulates those feelings.

Post: #4797

(03-11-2015 05:48 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

(03-11-2015 11:54 AM)kaotic Wrote:  The big problem was as she's telling me this she's getting dressed AND looking for her keys. By this time she's requested me twice to show her the door to the garage.

What would you say to the girl ? How would you frame it ?

I think by that point you had probably already lost her. But if she was on the verge of walking out, I probably would have tried to dramatically shift gears. Maybe say "let's go outside for a walk" or something. Get her mind off it and then try again in half an hour.

Hard to say without being there, though. Best bet is to have nipped that reaction in the bud, and never let it get to that point in the first place.

I seriously had a reaction time of maybe 5 minutes when she first rolled off top of me and started putting her clothes on immediately, its as if she was scared of herself.

Quote:

(03-11-2015 11:54 AM)kaotic Wrote:  That's a good salesman, but this isn't a rational conversation remember ?

You talk about the benefits of the "car", having her qualify herself, etc.

The sales examples appear rational/logical on the surface, but those techniques are designed to engage emotions and persuade a decision from the heart and not the mind.

---

Out of curiosity, which movie where you watching?

That might play a larger role in your game than you think.

- Violent movies make people feel defensive
- Scary movies make people feel edgy
- Comedies make people feel happy
- Romantic movies make people feel horny!

If you are showing your girl a Quentin Tarantino movie, chances are it affected her mood. His movies are designed to do so!

It's the same with music - you wouldn't play heavy metal or gangsta rap if you were trying to seduce a girl, even if you both like that genre. You would play something that is going to make her chill out.

The same goes with movies, food, locations, or whatever else you and the girl are surrounded with.

Cause and effect. People are heavily influenced by their environment.

If you want a girl to feel happy and open and relaxed, then you need to create an environment that stimulates those feelings.

It was Reservoir Dogs and if you know that movie, alot of blood and violence is involved.

First it was don't play movie she's into, now it's gotta be play into a movie that's a romantic comedy.

She dug my room, my records, movies, and was amused by my AR-15. That's why I thought it was going well.

We barely watched any of the movie since I pulled a move on her and she didn't skip a beat or pause while I was escalating.

Looking back it more, maybe I escalated too fast, if there is such a thing, idk, but the body language was there once the dry humping started.

I'll be paying better attention to my environment from now on.

Post: #4798

B7s is dropping great analysis I agree with everything 110.

It was a 6.5.. is the bottom line. Don't sweat it, if this happens again you will be reminded to stay cool and not give a fuck.

Be glad it happened with a 6.5.. Next time down the line when it's an 8 and you know what to do you will be thankful.

I had a similar freak out with the first girl I got a date with off campus day game and I had in bed, but didn't close. She was on my bed and she laughed at me trying to take off her belt and stopped me with her hands. I gave in and stopped completely failing her shit test. Never saw her again. She was a 6.5.. Glad as hell it happened with her because it never happened again from that sting of pain to my ego.

Another example was a 7.5 bartender I worked on forever and got whiskey dick couldn't get it up and freaked out because I was so invested in banging her.

Guess what... I stop drinking so much when I am out and I have some Cialis pills as an emergency if I think I could get whiskey dick or too much anxiety for a first bang.

No girl has successfully shit tested me last minute in bed, and I have not had whiskey dick since.

Both problems solved by learning from painful experiences.

These are good for you.

-----

Another good tip from B7s I have been following, play card games with some drinking involved or a board game with drinking rules applied something simple and stupid like Sorry! or Uno Duo etc... these are more interactive and have much more push pull than a movie.

I don't watch movies anymore on pre-bang dates ever.

Post: #4799

As someone who values quality, I just don't really get the quantity lifestyle. I guess it has to do with the thrill of "new pussy," but to me "good pussy" will trump new pussy every single time. No contest. I really do question how some guys can actually have penetrative and oral sex with women they don't find attractive. I honestly can't grasp it. It seems like a major time waster for both parties involved.

Now obviously the caveat is that, if you went for quality only, your notch count wouldn't be impressive. But who cares? Who cares what the number is?

When Derek Jeter retired, ESPN put up a graphic of his starting lineup. 9 girls he had dated throughout his career. I would take his 9 over a quantity dude's 50+ any day.

Granted I'm not Jeter and I'm not gonna get the quality he has access to. I just scratch my head at some guys on here and the bullshit they put up with, all for a notch that ultimately, is not very worth while to begin with.

I would think especially, after having some sexual experiences under your belt - your priorities would change, and you would be desensitized to the whole thing. So that you're not thirsty for just any pussy that comes your way, and are instead more selective. To each his own I guess.

I know there are entire threads dedicated to this argument so I'm not going to make one. Just something that's been on my mind and I really didn't have anywhere else to put it.

Post: #4800

(03-06-2015 02:26 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  Sometimes, the girl just doesn't want to see you again. (Even after kissing you on the first date) (she was drunk, she was experimenting, she was bored, etc.)

But, sometimes, guys are too impatient.

The first date goes well, so, guys think that sex is coming soon.

Guys push for a 2nd date, maybe the girl is not available or she is busy or she has to work or she is on her period, etc.

They struggle to set the 2nd date. The guy gets frustrated because things are not moving as quickly as he wanted.

Then, the guy gives up.

This is often a mistake.

If we would just be a little more patient and less eager, often times, the girl will eventually find time for a 2nd date.

Guys are expecting girls to move at the pace of a man. (fast)

But, girls sometimes want to move a little slower. Sometimes, they just have other stuff to do.

(Remember that the 2nd date is a much bigger commitment than the first date.)

Instead of giving up and "nexting" girls, I recommend having a little more patience.

Don't contact her for a week, don't be pushy, don't be needy, don't try to convince her, etc.

Pull back and give her some space.

Constantly pushing for a date is "thirsty"-- And, "thirty" is unattractive.

Don't always ask for a date. Just casually tell her what you are up to and maybe she will try to invite herself.

Use social media, "snapchat", picture messages, etc. to display the fun stuff that you do.

Instead of always inviting her, entice her to invite herself.

Don't always make it a 1 on 1 thing. Tell her you and your friends are going somewhere and she can come with her friends.

Basically, what I'm saying is.. Don't be so eager and pushy to set the 2nd date, if she flakes, don't sweat it, give her some time, try again next week, you should be working on other girls anyways.

There are plenty of things to talk about, especially, if they are tourists, they have many questions.

The subway was not the problem.

The problem was that you were out in public and you were not ready to game.

Every time you leave you house, you should be prepared to socialize.


Anything less than this is not trying hard enough.

When someone works so hard at a craft, when they talk or write, you can see the nuances and level in their game that is operating higher than most others. Agree with everything here.

Funny thing is I don't feel like I have the girl till the 3rd/4rth bang which sounds incredulous since she has already given up the prize. Not so, there is a crapload of rationalizing the happens after the bang and usually the reason why there isn't number 2. I try and keep some low intensity comfort texts after the 1st bang to reduce the sting of it.

Second thing - you always, always have to be ready when you leave your house, you never know. Lost many chances since the beginning of this year already due to not being mentally ready.