Should I bother going after this girl guys or just let it go?
Cliffnotes is we met in tinder, hung out one night and messed around in the car, fingered her and made out with her.
I hit her up and she acts dismissive
says that we can hang out but would i be okay if we didn't kiss
i prod further because sometimes girls are shit testing, being stupid, or insecure.
she told me she was scared of making connections with people so i thought it that.
she says she likes some other guy already so she doesn't want a guy who wants anything.
then she says "i could always like more than one. but i don't"
im not sure if she's just being a bitch and i should move on or go hang with her and make a move anyway. if we hung out im sure we'd mess around but im not sure if i have the emotional energy to chase after women who anymore.
another part of me, my ego, is peeved by this or whoever this guy is and want to prove her wrong and try to bang.
im bummed reading about everyone getting notches left and right. dating has always been difficult for me.
(01-04-2016 05:01 AM)Valhalla Wrote: Should I bother going after this girl guys or just let it go?
Cliffnotes is we met in tinder, hung out one night and messed around in the car, fingered her and made out with her.
I hit her up and she acts dismissive
says that we can hang out but would i be okay if we didn't kiss
i prod further because sometimes girls are shit testing, being stupid, or insecure.
she told me she was scared of making connections with people so i thought it that.
she says she likes some other guy already so she doesn't want a guy who wants anything.
then she says "i could always like more than one. but i don't"
im not sure if she's just being a bitch and i should move on or go hang with her and make a move anyway. if we hung out im sure we'd mess around but im not sure if i have the emotional energy to chase after women who anymore.
another part of me, my ego, is peeved by this or whoever this guy is and want to prove her wrong and try to bang.
im bummed reading about everyone getting notches left and right. dating has always been difficult for me.
I wouldn't bother. It sounds like you'll be fighting an uphill battle to convert a no girl into a yes girl.
Unless you can do a date where you are isolated (your place) so you can then escalate messing around to get her hot enough to get the bang.
If she wants to hang out somewhere public and/or with bad logistics for you to get her somewhere isolated then I'd move on.
3 weeks in a dry spell. My harem's collapsed. The last girl stopped contacting me so I dropped her for good. Nothing going on in my city for the holidays since everyone seemed to go to the coast. I had to work and didn't feel like facing all the traffic so I stayed.
I'm re-reading Day Bang so I can get back at my 2013's day game levels. i LTR'd a German chick in 2014 for one year and a half and my game got rusty. I'm struggling even to open girls in day time, complete approach anxiety. It's amazing how it goes down when you don't constantly keep practising it no matter what.
For now my goal is to rebuild my harem and daygame for real.
Not sure if this belongs in the Player's Lounge thread or elsewhere but a few things I noticed after spending a lot of time with my LTR this past weekend. Nothing groundbreaking here by any means, but just a couple thoughts that I figured I'd share.
I think one of the biggest things with getting into a relationship, from what I'm seeing, is making sure you keep time for yourself and stay focused on your mission and body/health. This is my first real relationship, not to mention the first one after learning game and using red pill knowledge. After spending the last 3-4 days with her on a trip (it was great), I'm definitely seeing how these LTRs breed complacency and mediocrity. How oftentimes you end up much worse off after the LTR ends than you were before, save you have more experience/knowledge. But your game can (and likely will) become dull, you become unmotivated, undisciplined, doughy, having shit eating and diet habits on a count of always going out and not devoting enough time to the gym, etc. Before this LTR I was firing on all cylinders, body, work, diet, health, family, etc. Not gonna lie but the last few weeks and month since we got serious all this has taken a hit. I've been bullshitting with my workouts, my diet, and my business.
I need to re-jigger the focus this week. I have too much to lose and can't afford to fuck around and let my mission slip. Especially since I know I'm not gonna marry this girl (I'm 23) and this shit likely will not extend too much into the warmer months. I need to get my swagger back.
(01-04-2016 07:54 AM)Thatdude Wrote: Not sure if this belongs in the Player's Lounge thread or elsewhere but a few things I noticed after spending a lot of time with my LTR this past weekend. Nothing groundbreaking here by any means, but just a couple thoughts that I figured I'd share.
I think one of the biggest things with getting into a relationship, from what I'm seeing, is making sure you keep time for yourself and stay focused on your mission and body/health. This is my first real relationship, not to mention the first one after learning game and using red pill knowledge. After spending the last 3-4 days with her on a trip (it was great), I'm definitely seeing how these LTRs breed complacency and mediocrity. How oftentimes you end up much worse off after the LTR ends than you were before, save you have more experience/knowledge. But your game can (and likely will) become dull, you become unmotivated, undisciplined, doughy, having shit eating and diet habits on a count of always going out and not devoting enough time to the gym, etc. Before this LTR I was firing on all cylinders, body, work, diet, health, family, etc. Not gonna lie but the last few weeks and month since we got serious all this has taken a hit. I've been bullshitting with my workouts, my diet, and my business.
I need to re-jigger the focus this week. I have too much to lose and can't afford to fuck around and let my mission slip. Especially since I know I'm not gonna marry this girl (I'm 23) and this shit likely will not extend too much into the warmer months. I need to get my swagger back.
Great post. Cheers to you seeing this when you're 23. I learned this when I came to the red pill, but I've noticed it again in the last few months with the chic I've been seeing. Good to catch it early.
One thing I've found is that, while a relationship will inherently dull my game (more time spent with her, less spent gaming), I have no problem keeping a work out and lifting schedule...which maintains inner game, gives you time for yourself and personal goals, and offsets any hit to your 'gaming'.
(01-04-2016 07:54 AM)Thatdude Wrote: Not sure if this belongs in the Player's Lounge thread or elsewhere but a few things I noticed after spending a lot of time with my LTR this past weekend. Nothing groundbreaking here by any means, but just a couple thoughts that I figured I'd share.
I think one of the biggest things with getting into a relationship, from what I'm seeing, is making sure you keep time for yourself and stay focused on your mission and body/health. This is my first real relationship, not to mention the first one after learning game and using red pill knowledge. After spending the last 3-4 days with her on a trip (it was great), I'm definitely seeing how these LTRs breed complacency and mediocrity. How oftentimes you end up much worse off after the LTR ends than you were before, save you have more experience/knowledge. But your game can (and likely will) become dull, you become unmotivated, undisciplined, doughy, having shit eating and diet habits on a count of always going out and not devoting enough time to the gym, etc. Before this LTR I was firing on all cylinders, body, work, diet, health, family, etc. Not gonna lie but the last few weeks and month since we got serious all this has taken a hit. I've been bullshitting with my workouts, my diet, and my business.
I need to re-jigger the focus this week. I have too much to lose and can't afford to fuck around and let my mission slip. Especially since I know I'm not gonna marry this girl (I'm 23) and this shit likely will not extend too much into the warmer months. I need to get my swagger back.
Great post. Cheers to you seeing this when you're 23. I learned this when I came to the red pill, but I've noticed it again in the last few months with the chic I've been seeing. Good to catch it early.
One thing I've found is that, while a relationship will inherently dull my game (more time spent with her, less spent gaming), I have no problem keeping a work out and lifting schedule...which maintains inner game, gives you time for yourself and personal goals, and offsets any hit to your 'gaming'.
I've noticed this too but I try not to make a big deal out of it. Sometimes we on this forum takes this whole thing way too seriously and forget that the most important thing is to have fun and enjoy life.
Your game will get rusty during a LTR, so what? You don't just forget game, it's like riding a bike. A couple of night gaming heavily will work out the kinks easily.
The best freedom game gives me is the assurance that, I can fall in love and be heavily invested in a LTR and yet when it ends, I will pick myself up and get back into the game as easy as usual. If you were a slayer, then got into a LTR, then comes out blue-pill chode again, maybe you never had it in the first place.
Secondly, LTR is game, and it teaches as much if not more than plowing your routines on random girls. It's all part of becoming a better man. There's something about building a deep bond with a girl and accept her as part of your life that gives you another perspective other than one night stands.
Third, you do game your girlfriend during a LTR if the girl is really worth it, it's just a different kind of game. If you are mediocre and complacent expect to either get cheated on or her monkey branching you before you do.
This occured to me briefly this weekend regarding texting.
I have a chic I banged a few times a couple months ago. She lives out of town, but occasionally she'll come to town and text me to hang out.
We were going to meet up Saturday, but barely missed each other (she followed me to a bar, but I'd left already...no big deal).
Sunday we texted back and forth briefly, with me sending the last text. While this wasn't a big deal, I think in my younger less experienced days I'd have been pissed she didn't text back and maybe shot another text later that day. Now I don't care.
She wasn't avoiding me by not replying, she just didn't have any reason to text me back. We weren't figuring out logistics to meet up. Neither of us are interested in some stupid witty banter back and forth.
She simply didn't reply to my text for the same reason I don't reply to texts sometimes...even hers. I have a buddy who is the same way with dull banter. Text is communication boiled down to it's most basic, dull form.
Chics are opportunists. If you offer something interesting, they'll respond. Text conversation isn't that interesting, especially if you aren't giving her drama.
Point is, there's a reason I downplay 'text game' outside a first online / Tinder meetup. It's a numbers game, keep your texts minimal.
Does anyone just take a break from game? I just came back from the Dominican Republic and I'm just not as attracted to women in LA as I used to be. The very thought of casual sex is just doesn't appeal to me as much as it once did, and as such, I'm not really in the mood to daygame at all. Instead I'd rather just read some books, work on making money, and maybe find a cool girl to LTR for a bit.
(01-04-2016 04:56 PM)Agastya Wrote: Does anyone just take a break from game? I just came back from the Dominican Republic and I'm just not as attracted to women in LA as I used to be. The very thought of casual sex is just doesn't appeal to me as much as it once did, and as such, I'm not really in the mood to daygame at all. Instead I'd rather just read some books, work on making money, and maybe find a cool girl to LTR for a bit.
There's nothing wrong with that at all. From late August until the end of November I was in your very position. The bottom line is do what makes you happy. Game shouldn't be a chore or a job, it should be something you do because you enjoy it. If you're burned out or have lost the desire put it down and come back later when you're ready to go again.
(01-04-2016 04:56 PM)Agastya Wrote: Does anyone just take a break from game? I just came back from the Dominican Republic and I'm just not as attracted to women in LA as I used to be. The very thought of casual sex is just doesn't appeal to me as much as it once did, and as such, I'm not really in the mood to daygame at all. Instead I'd rather just read some books, work on making money, and maybe find a cool girl to LTR for a bit.
These are all very healthy things to do. Just be careful dont be too focused or eager on finding a LTR though. If it comes, it comes.
The term "takes a break from game" gets different answers around here. Some will say you never break away from game, others say you need to from time to time. I would say it's a little bit of both. Maybe you dont need to go out every weekend and spending money on useless stuffs to get girls, or grind through bunch of meaningless number.
But when you actually are talking to a girl that you think you like, you still need to escalate, get her number, ask her out, kiss her and try to sleep with her. Then if it still pleases you keep going out with her until the relationship either escalates into a LTR or one of you drop off. Relationship is like a river, you either go forward or go back.
That was how me and most redpill men I know got into a LTR anyway. We just keep doing our thing and not going out actively seeking women, but when an opportunity presents itself you grab it full speed. Good girls are a dying breed, don't expect a LTR-worthy girl to just fall into your lap.
I would add that you need to earn your break with game though. Breaking away too soon from the game without having learned the essential parts risks getting you burn for jumping into LTR prematurely.
I'm thinking of flaking on a date tonight. I have either a cold or some kind of flu virus.
Think I caught it from the girl I hooked up with Saturday. Feeling a bit weak with brain fog. I can tell my body needs the rest.
I know I wouldn't be my full self tonight if I went. It'd be like robreke personality "lite"
My date is a 24 yo burlesque dancer and, from the pics I've seen, has a body that won't quit. So, I'm torn.
She's been very compliant on texts and put up for options either tonight or later in the week, so I'm thinking of rescheduling but you know how women can be. One in the hand two in the bush and all.
Also, I've got at least 2 to 3 more dates lined up this week including a cute co ed tomorrow.
But, she's a freaking burlesque dancer. Who knows, maybe a flake will up her interest.
Maybe I hit up a big cup of coffee and vitamin C power pack and trooper on.
Lost one of my long term plates today. I think she's had a new year inspired look at her life and has realised there is nothing serious with me and decided to move on from me to find something serious.
We've been banging for over 6 months now (I invite her over, she rocks up, we bang a couple of times and then she leaves) and I'm a bit surprised it's taken this long, although at the same time I thought she'd just moved into a phase where she was content with our arrangement. She's mid 20's so I think she's starting to feel the clock tick.
It's a shame as she has a tight body and gives amazing sloppy blow jobs which I'm really going to miss. She told me over text so I'm trying to get her to come over for a last goodbye bang.
(01-05-2016 01:04 AM)Roardog Wrote: Lost one of my long term plates today. I think she's had a new year inspired look at her life and has realised there is nothing serious with me and decided to move on from me to find something serious.
We've been banging for over 6 months now (I invite her over, she rocks up, we bang a couple of times and then she leaves) and I'm a bit surprised it's taken this long, although at the same time I thought she'd just moved into a phase where she was content with our arrangement. She's mid 20's so I think she's starting to feel the clock tick.
It's a shame as she has a tight body and gives amazing sloppy blow jobs which I'm really going to miss. She told me over text so I'm trying to get her to come over for a last goodbye bang.
Funny, the same thing happened to me. My last girl in the harem has decided it's better to bang the DJ she met before me. The sex was good but terrible BJ, she was'nt my main girl (who also decided to move on before) so I've decided to move on as well.
(01-05-2016 01:04 AM)Roardog Wrote: Lost one of my long term plates today. I think she's had a new year inspired look at her life and has realised there is nothing serious with me and decided to move on from me to find something serious.
We've been banging for over 6 months now (I invite her over, she rocks up, we bang a couple of times and then she leaves) and I'm a bit surprised it's taken this long, although at the same time I thought she'd just moved into a phase where she was content with our arrangement. She's mid 20's so I think she's starting to feel the clock tick.
It's a shame as she has a tight body and gives amazing sloppy blow jobs which I'm really going to miss. She told me over text so I'm trying to get her to come over for a last goodbye bang.
Try something counter-intuitive? She expects you to pester, like more guys, for more. How about, for example, texting 'actually, I'm relieved to hear from you you want to move because I thought about the same.'
(01-05-2016 01:04 AM)Roardog Wrote: Lost one of my long term plates today. I think she's had a new year inspired look at her life and has realised there is nothing serious with me and decided to move on from me to find something serious.
We've been banging for over 6 months now (I invite her over, she rocks up, we bang a couple of times and then she leaves) and I'm a bit surprised it's taken this long, although at the same time I thought she'd just moved into a phase where she was content with our arrangement. She's mid 20's so I think she's starting to feel the clock tick.
It's a shame as she has a tight body and gives amazing sloppy blow jobs which I'm really going to miss. She told me over text so I'm trying to get her to come over for a last goodbye bang.
Try something counter-intuitive? She expects you to pester, like more guys, for more. How about, for example, texting 'actually, I'm relieved to hear from you you want to move because I thought about the same.'
Something counter-intuitive would be to completely ignore her for some months, asses her relationship status and then send a feeler text and try to reboot the relationship (FWB in this case).
Past year I had a fine 20 y/o who gave good BJs break up with me because I wasn't giving her monogamy, but Blackdragon came to the rescue with this golden article:
Blackdragon Wrote:Today I’m going to discuss another extremely powerful, simple-to-do-but-hard-to-mentally-accept technique that will change your life if you get it and practice it.
I’m going to tell you how to ensure an ex comes back to you after she breaks up with you, nexts you, LSNFTEs you, or otherwise leaves you. I have used this technique bazillions of times on scores of women with success rates as high as 94%. It works like a clock, IF you have the balls and self-control to do it, and many of you will not.
Ready? Here it is:
Completely ignore her for at least four months.
That’s it. Just ignore her. Don’t text her. Don’t call her. Don’t email her. Don’t Facebook her. Don’t “like” or comment on anything she posts on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or anything else. Completely vanish out of her life, like you were never there.
Had a date last night - 31 year old with what I thought a 7 or so.
....She was almost a spitting image of my 2nd to last ex, the one I joined the forum for.
The hair, the double chin, the smile, it was surreal.
Funny thing is, no emotions bubbled up, I texted my buddy laughing about it when I was in the pisser.
We played some pool, I taught her a few tricks, she huffed because I smoked her every game we played.
The bouncer/bartender was fucking funny, I'm definitely bringing more girls to this dive bar.
Overall she was cool, she's an outdoorsy girl, from the north east coast on a rural farm in the country, I like that alot.
Quite a few red flags, shame really, if she was in her early 20's she'd be way more fun and hotter.
I think she got me fucking sick, woke up this morning and could barely swallow water.
Have dates lined up tonight and tomorrow, but I think I've gotta cancel on today, I'm just not feeling good, I'm actually leaving work as we speak, sucks she's cute also.
(01-05-2016 01:04 AM)Roardog Wrote: Lost one of my long term plates today. I think she's had a new year inspired look at her life and has realised there is nothing serious with me and decided to move on from me to find something serious.
We've been banging for over 6 months now (I invite her over, she rocks up, we bang a couple of times and then she leaves) and I'm a bit surprised it's taken this long, although at the same time I thought she'd just moved into a phase where she was content with our arrangement. She's mid 20's so I think she's starting to feel the clock tick.
It's a shame as she has a tight body and gives amazing sloppy blow jobs which I'm really going to miss. She told me over text so I'm trying to get her to come over for a last goodbye bang.
Try something counter-intuitive? She expects you to pester, like more guys, for more. How about, for example, texting 'actually, I'm relieved to hear from you you want to move because I thought about the same.'
Something counter-intuitive would be to completely ignore her for some months, asses her relationship status and then send a feeler text and try to reboot the relationship (FWB in this case).
Past year I had a fine 20 y/o who gave good BJs break up with me because I wasn't giving her monogamy, but Blackdragon came to the rescue with this golden article:
Blackdragon Wrote:Today I’m going to discuss another extremely powerful, simple-to-do-but-hard-to-mentally-accept technique that will change your life if you get it and practice it.
I’m going to tell you how to ensure an ex comes back to you after she breaks up with you, nexts you, LSNFTEs you, or otherwise leaves you. I have used this technique bazillions of times on scores of women with success rates as high as 94%. It works like a clock, IF you have the balls and self-control to do it, and many of you will not.
Ready? Here it is:
Completely ignore her for at least four months.
That’s it. Just ignore her. Don’t text her. Don’t call her. Don’t email her. Don’t Facebook her. Don’t “like” or comment on anything she posts on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or anything else. Completely vanish out of her life, like you were never there.
(01-05-2016 09:25 AM)ksbms Wrote: Try something counter-intuitive? She expects you to pester, like more guys, for more. How about, for example, texting 'actually, I'm relieved to hear from you you want to move because I thought about the same.'
Reframed as "Do the opposite of how she want you to feel" and watch the hamster go in overdrive.
I'm curious what everyone's post-bang plan is, if you had a solid connection with the girl.
Looking back, one of my issues in 2015 was diving in too soon with girls I really clicked with.
I wouldn't do standard beta moves like ask to be exclusive or take them on fancy trips, but I would emotionally progress the relationship too much or see them too often. The latter hindered my player vibe and put me more into a boyfriend position.
Referencing GLL's Retention Guide, I definitely contact girls too much. Young girls just want to text all the time to see what's going on.
A cousin of mine has a couple sexy chicks vying for exclusivity, and he is constantly complaining to me how much trouble he is having keeping them at bay. According to him-he tells them in no uncertain terms that it is what it is. Still doesn't keep them from trying to define things.
-So I ask him what steps are you taking to keep things casual
-Are you distancing yourself enough,
-Spacing out your hangouts
We talk daily so I knew the answer from hearing the girls in the background often. He brings them around to meet his close buddies and their women. They go out to eat, and stay overnight.
Guys can say whatever they wish, but your actions have to be congruent. If a guy's actions are actually contradictory, you're just giving these girls false hope.