Girl I had a ONS with this past weekend doesn't get back to my text...is this the norm? feeling slutty for the ONS?

I just needed to vent, basically what it amounts to is: I hate losing. So, when I get close like that, if I don't get the notch, I feel like I've failed. That mentality helped me get really good at one night stands.

Anyway, I don't think there's a bf/ex-bf in the picture. She 'claimed' to have been single for awhile, but was a little taken back when I told her I got out of something recently. I don't think that's the reason she detached though, I'm an expert at talking my way out of things and changing the subject. My guess is she has someone else in the same spot as me, and was trying to decide who to pick. When I skipped out on Saturday, I fell back in the race.

Anyway, NOT TEXTING WORKED AGAIN, and she's finally responded with random questions no less. Me 5, shit maybe even 2-3 years ago would've definitely sent that panic text, trying to elicit any reaction. Again, that's a rookie move! For anyone reading this, don't EVER do that!

Sadly, another girl I was working on, I was not able to get a restart on. That was my fault though, I had a decent text convo going with her, and then just didn't send anything to her for almost a week... oops! Oh, and it's because I was focusing on someone I was closer to banging ... OH GOD DAMMIT! Needless to say, I'm probably getting what I deserve right now ha ha.

"Girl I had a ONS with this past weekend doesn't get back to my text...is this the norm? feeling slutty for the ONS?"

It is normal.

Girls are acting like guys now.

Pumping and dumping.

I've noticed this trend start around 1.5-2 years ago.

Don't worry about it, just keep hunting.

(06-30-2014 09:43 PM)Christian McQueen Wrote:  "Girl I had a ONS with this past weekend doesn't get back to my text...is this the norm? feeling slutty for the ONS?"

It is normal.

Girls are acting like guys now.

Pumping and dumping.

I've noticed this trend start around 1.5-2 years ago.

Don't worry about it, just keep hunting.

Game used to be this thing for "ladies men" now it's just what you need to do as a man to get by with girls these days.

It's like basic mental health regulation.

--

Banged out my Subway Senorita from a while back. She's got a nice bongo butt.

I had a girl over few times in april/may that I never got past LMR with. Very hot 8.5, specialist/doctor at a hospital, 28'ish (just graduated as specialist last year).

Kissing/fingering etc always worked easily, she was moaning and soaking wet - but said she doesn't do ONS. Talked about her before in this thread: ( http://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-24128-...#pid697611 ).

Yesterday she started messaging (whatsapp) me out of the blue, quite late in the evening, translated to english. I know this might be longer than most would advice, but I had to reignite what we had going before:


Her- just got home from work, how is it going with you?
(I send a picture of my tv, with a bottle of cava open in front of it - just what I was doing at that time)
Me- mad men time here, all going good as you can see
Her- ooh, that's such a cool serie, good taste
Me- You knew that already, since i kissed you
Her- I'm blushing, long time someone did that to me
Me- Shame I can't see it
Her- I don't want to send you a picture, you could abuse that and as you might have noticed i don't like to show "weakness"
Me- Your picture doesn't sound like a weakness - but I was actually talking about you being here
Her- You probably have other girls to keep you company...
Me- Ofcourse, but next week you'll be lying here next to me watching mad men together
Her- I prefer men who are not into young sluts
Me- C'mon, it's unfair to call yourself that
Her- Damn, you tricked me Ok - I will be your groupy
Me- Perfect, tuesday is my fanday, meet and greet for my best groupy
Her- What a coincidence what are the selectioncriteria?
Me- Being a groupy, intelligent, and damn good at kissing
Her- Check, check and.. i never kissed with myself!
Me- I'll vouch in for that last one. Congrats, you won
Her- Yess!
Her- Easiest contest ever..
Her-
(five minutes of no reply)
Me- Ok see you tuesday, 19h ok? Going to continue watching the series now
Her- Ok, I'm going to sleep - good night and see you tuesday! x

(All the smileys were hers - for those who just skimp the convo)

I feel as this would be our 4th "date", and she restarted it herself, it might work this time.

I did BET weekend in LA. Man, some sexy chocolate ladies out. Lots of girls just wearing pants/skirts and bras. My bartender said it best- "titties popping out everywhere".

Cj you can't lose in this game.

Every "rejection" means you have time for a new approach.

The "losses" in game are pregnant opportunities.

That said, to play the game right, I think you need to be playing it a lot. That's how you get the abundance mentality that will free your mind.

One way to activate it is to imagine what it would be like if you had unlimited 9s to chose from.

Ask yourself what a guy in that position would do. Always operate from that perspective.

It's the same thing with money and life purpose.

A while back, I was playing a lot of poker online.. Trying to get good. I was at a crossroads and didn't know what I wanted to do with my life. I was also losing a lot in poker and wasn't making much money with my job (poker has a very steep learning curve).

I was spending more and more time on poker. My girlfriend at the time was getting mad at me. She'd go to bed and I stay up playing poker. She used to be able to tell that I was playing because she said I had "poker breath" (sitting in front if a computer for a long time without opening your mouth will give you this).

One day, after losing a big chunk of change, I asked my self what I would do with all the money I would win if I got good. If money wasn't an issue, how would I chose to spend my time?

I realized that if I had billions if dollars, I'd probably spend my days making music or art.

I said goodbye to poker, my great addiction- it's really one if the best games ever invented, and started doing music.

The same thing happened when I learned about game. Growing up I always figured that being a successful musician or artist was going to give me access to poosy paradise.

While it's true that being famous is like having a nuke at your disposal in game, I learned that you don't need fame to get girls.

Instead of focussing on being famous, I decided to be "gamous".

Both the ephanies I've mentioned here deal recognizing the "middle man" things in your life and cutting them out so you can have direct access to what you want.

Don't get me wrong- I still want to make a lot if money, but I realized that my time is the most important thing, and hey, there are plenty if guys out there who are making tons more money than I who probably dream about the lifestyle I live.. Playing music all the time and banging a lot.

There are probably famous people out there that wish they were better with girls, and are probably jealous of us players who can be "off the grid" or out of the spotlight but can still quality girls. Again, I still want get famous for what I do because I know it would open up more opportunities for me- and I also think that I would have greater inner piece because I do feel like a amnesiatic king trying to remember my true self, but I can still operate by engaging the point of view of the famous man who has exceptional options with women.

Try thinking about things from the perspective of a man who is at the top of the mountain.

Obviously there are some things that only high level men can know and feel from the access they have, but there's a lot of info out there now in how these guys think.

I believe it helpful to develop in your mind a mental consigliere of the great men.

Thinking about money? Go read the biographies of the great tycoons, and internalize their personalities so you can sort of ask them questions in your mind. What would the greats do in a particular situation?

Acting or directing? Go read Casseavetes bio or Brando or Ben Gazzara (highly recommend this- he talks about banging lots Hollywood babes), and then you can think about things from the perspective if the greats.

Art? Go to Florence and draw Michelangelo's sculptures or copy Caravaggios paintings. Then you can actually start to learn how they did what they did.

The forum is the actual real life version of this mental consigliere for game. That's why it's great. Together we make up a sort of living brain or think tank that specializes in pussy. I don't think there is anything like this in the world, past or present.

There have been countless times when I've been out in the field and I thought to myself about the top players in here would approach a given situation. Shit, you can actually go and ask them!

Anyway, CJ, keep the larger perspective. It can be hard if you are in a dry spell or are thirsty, but always act from a position of power not weakness. Keep your dignity even when things get dark. It's that bigger perspective, the "god view," that girls will sense in you. Think and act like the alpha, the father, the sun, and the girls will gravitate to your radiance. Then you will have become him.

Preach, brother--this is something special.

(07-01-2014 09:37 AM)Goldmund Wrote:  Preach, brother--this is something special.

Ha- yo I've been texting with that short hair Euro chick from the other night. Probably going to meet with her on Wed.

Nice, she was a ripe one.

Gotta love Bushwick--getting girls is like pickin' fruit from a tree.

Have you guys also noticed how often girls seem to time their responses?

Ever since roosh mentioned this in bang I've noticed it. There's no way its coincidence sometimes. Receiving replies at the exact 60 minute or 30 minute mark give or take a minute.

(07-01-2014 10:16 AM)Nascimento Wrote:  Have you guys also noticed how often girls seem to time their responses?

Ever since roosh mentioned this in bang I've noticed it. There's no way its coincidence sometimes. Receiving replies at the exact 60 minute or 30 minute mark give or take a minute.

They work at the game just as much the guys on here do.

They are animals want to respond all knee-jerk, but their anti-slut, and wanna be cool mechanisms are pushing them all the time.

That's why when they get drunk their game gets all sloppy and bone more easily.

For us, we don't have inner conflicts about casual sex.

Imagine a dog trying to act like civilized person. At every moment, it feels incredibly powerful instincts and urges to act on, but it's trying to hold back as much as possible.

Girls have a storm of competing forces inside. They really want to pig out on alpha cock, but they also don't want to feel shame.

Nature isn't fair to them in this sense. They are cursed with these dilemmas, but they also do get the advantage over men when we are in our teen-late twenties.

I think girls have to deal with more drama in general. Going from queen of the world to post-wall-roadkill so fast must really suck.

Guys' lives and power are slower to mature and wane.

(07-01-2014 10:49 AM)soup Wrote:  They work at the game just as much the guys on here do.

It's interesting because it seems almost all girls work at the game like us. At least the attractive ones that we'd be out with in the first place that have other options like we do us well.

Most guys don't work at the game. You can tell because most guys send long winding texts and emoticons, reply promptly, text too often..

Is it a correct observation that it's the few of us working at this that get the real good shots at getting with the higher quality girls? Say >/=7's. Although they get attention from all guys low and high value, it's only the top guys with lifestyle/game in check that have a shot/bang them/get them hooked and in love.

Although many girls are average or poor looking nowadays due to culture, the fewer hot girls that are out there (which there always will be) are in low supply to average guys but in abundance to higher quality guys?

Yes- we are the ones here who have the chance.. mostly because most guys either don't know or aren't convinced that they can improve. They are also taught to "be themselves" and think that any kind of change like doing a fashion makeover or getting in shape is being a poser or "fake".

They get stunted in this sense.

Also, it's publicly excepted for girls to do things like look in the mirror to fix their make up etc., but if guys try to make themselves more attractive, it's often shamed.

(07-01-2014 12:30 PM)soup Wrote:  Also, it's publicly excepted for girls to do things like look in the mirror to fix their make up etc., but if guys try to make themselves more attractive, it's often shamed.

Agreed, my attitudes and views changed, I dress better. Some of my friends are surprised I have the views I have. What's odd is the females I discuss some of my POV's with actually agree with me in how men should act. Of course they would never be vocal about it in public.

(07-01-2014 03:35 AM)casio Wrote:  Her- You probably have other girls to keep you company...
Me- Ofcourse, but next week you'll be lying here next to me watching mad men together
Her- I prefer men who are not into young sluts
Me- C'mon, it's unfair to call yourself that
Her- Damn, you tricked me Ok - I will be your groupy

Frame. Held.

[/quote]

Most guys don't work at the game. You can tell because most guys send long winding texts and emoticons, reply promptly, text too often..

[/quote]

Most guys never will allow themselves to work at it because their ego won't let them.

It takes humility to admit you need to get better at something, and humility is a trait that is often looked down upon. When used properly it's a strength...a relaxed confidence that allows you to learn from others who are more experienced than you.

I'm not worried about game becoming mainstream because the majority of men are slaves to their egos.

(07-01-2014 08:58 AM)soup Wrote:  The same thing happened when I learned about game. Growing up I always figured that being a successful musician or artist was going to give me access to poosy paradise.

Right on. Having the artistic/music side is more like a multiplier. If you aren't already a guy that gets laid, it's not going to be a magic bullet.

It can also be an exponential effect once you get the ball rolling.

The big changes come from the fact that if you're out performing and interacting a couple times a week, you get A LOT of exposure not only to gaming but meeting a ton of people and seeing how those people game.

Often times as performers, between sets we got a table in the VIP area to relax. Got to meet all sorts of high-brow guys and girls that were living lifestyles I could only dream of, and most all of them were totally cool with chatting it up and sometimes keeping in touch. This then led to boat parties, private fishing charters, whatever. Stuff that most people would consider way out of my league was unlocked through game and building this 'gamous' attitude Soup talks about.

Playing shows to happy hour crowds can insanely help with networking. Between/after your sets almost all the business 9-5 types will be down to talk music, which will segue into business/ parties/ whatever.

As far as nightlife goes, most of the promoters in my city would start their evenings at a happy hour and I got to know some of them pretty well through music gigs because they would all be chilling/relaxing before the 'work' of the night began. The cool thing was that once my 'work' (aka gig) was over, they would often invite me out to their venue on guest list or bottle service. They knew I could bring a good couple people/girls and for that reason were always insanely kind and generous.

^ casio

That text frame was a thing of beauty.

(07-01-2014 01:31 PM)Goldmund Wrote:  Most guys don't work at the game. You can tell because most guys send long winding texts and emoticons, reply promptly, text too often..


Most guys never will allow themselves to work at it because their ego won't let them.

It takes humility to admit you need to get better at something, and humility is a trait that is often looked down upon. When used properly it's a strength...a relaxed confidence that allows you to learn from others who are more experienced than you.

I'm not worried about game becoming mainstream because the majority of men are slaves to their egos.

This is the absolute truth. I recently wrote this on the approach thread and it resonates slit with what you said

(06-26-2014 02:06 AM)simondice Wrote:  I was talking to a guy that was very popular in my high school that has a very hot girlfriend now, and he saw me talk to this cute girl and get her number, he told me never in a million years would he get up and approach a girl like that during daylight, sober. I asked him, "why? you seem so confident and at ease, that girl is not going to bite you"
He said that he couldn't live it down if one girl like that (a 7) rejected him (pussy).

An alpha male in his corner of the world, cannot approach a 7 (and he's not alone). It goes to show that when we put our balls on the line, and after putting in the work, we get to the point where game has stripped a layer of ego, made us better, and we hold the power because we are learning how women, who hold a lot of power over men, work and we know how to deal with them strategically and powerfully.

@soup

Scary good insights lately your perspectives have grown extremely sharp since I first lurked RVF in mid 2012. Always a good read.

(07-01-2014 01:42 PM)Santoro Wrote:  

(07-01-2014 08:58 AM)soup Wrote:  The same thing happened when I learned about game. Growing up I always figured that being a successful musician or artist was going to give me access to poosy paradise.

Right on. Having the artistic/music side is more like a multiplier. If you aren't already a guy that gets laid, it's not going to be a magic bullet.

It can also be an exponential effect once you get the ball rolling.

The big changes come from the fact that if you're out performing and interacting a couple times a week, you get A LOT of exposure not only to gaming but meeting a ton of people and seeing how those people game.

Often times as performers, between sets we got a table in the VIP area to relax. Got to meet all sorts of high-brow guys and girls that were living lifestyles I could only dream of, and most all of them were totally cool with chatting it up and sometimes keeping in touch. This then led to boat parties, private fishing charters, whatever. Stuff that most people would consider way out of my league was unlocked through game and building this 'gamous' attitude Soup talks about.

Playing shows to happy hour crowds can insanely help with networking. Between/after your sets almost all the business 9-5 types will be down to talk music, which will segue into business/ parties/ whatever.

As far as nightlife goes, most of the promoters in my city would start their evenings at a happy hour and I got to know some of them pretty well through music gigs because they would all be chilling/relaxing before the 'work' of the night began. The cool thing was that once my 'work' (aka gig) was over, they would often invite me out to their venue on guest list or bottle service. They knew I could bring a good couple people/girls and for that reason were always insanely kind and generous.

I have this thing now about getting "rejected" where I don't feel like I'm getting rejected because I can use the girl for other things like promoting my shows/parties.

When I was hanging with Goldmund, we approached these two chicks outside of a bar.

The one I was talking to eventually dropped the "I have a boyf"* thing, but I was like "that's cool.. you guys should come to my party" She took my number, and I have't heard back from her yet, but it wasn't like a bridge burning rejection.

I think when you start connecting your lifestyle/job with game, you can get more out of it then just being a weekend warrior type.

I'm weary of some girls who seem all to eager to talk because they are looking for a little ego 1-up when they drop this line. This is different from girls who will just drop that line up front. The ones that draw out the conversations are looking to troll you by wasting your time. It's all good either way for me now because I'm trying to get do the mayor thing more now instead of just the bad boy lone wolf.


----

I just remembered a funny moment from that night.. I was talking to one of these two best girls at the place we were at and the bouncer just came and stood right in front of us. Goldmund saw this. More of a reason to lock down a venue before you start running game, even if it is a dive bar. I wasn't doing anything crazy, but the security was hovering.

The chick I was talking to outside that bar told me "I only go for guys who are taller than me"

I replied something along the lines of "Just you saying that makes me want to pin you against the wall, hard"

She got so fucking turned on right then and there and the puppy dog look came out.

I turned her initial rejection into energy and was able to respond like that. There are no rejections--only missed opportunities!

-and yeah, that bouncer coming up to you was super fucking weird, never have seen that before.

I still wished I could have pulled that 'lesbian' with the dreads, goddamn she had a beautiful face.

The promoting thing is gold. I wish your thread on that had taken off a bit more. Spiderkings stuff was good but more Vegas niche (more oriented to huge mega clubs vs small live music venues). I picked up a similar 'promoting' habit from a guy I gigged out with. He would hedge his bets all the time, I think very similarly to what you're talking about

For example, he would talk to girls and determine if they were more into live music or clubbing. From there they got asked to a drink or an invite to his gig, or he would take their number and use the promoters he knew to get them in the club. Usually he would invite them over to pre-game at his place, which was near said club. This way they could all roll up together and he could take credit for bringing them in

If they came to a gig, great, run game or just leave them be. Didn't really matter because eventually he would meet up with the promoters later and another group of girls. Because he brought a decent amount of girls in, his clubbing nights were always comped. If he brought girls from his gig to meet up with other girls later, the two groups would usually 'compete' to see which group was 'more fun' which was always a good thing. Of course, the real promoters laughed all the way to the bank, but for a musician's lifestyle I think this is pretty damn good and is pretty 'effortless' once you're up on your feet. By effortless I mean it's simply a fun way to go through life that builds tons of social momentum, there's never pressure to do anything and you can back off anytime you like without seeing a huge hit like a 'real' promoter would

Great points Soup, a lot of stuff is a good refresher; stuff that I'll occasionally stray from, and definitely appreciate the reminders. The poker stuff; however, hits real close to home. My old account: http://www.thepokerdb.com/MisterElephant...er/161600/

Those "winnings" are before buy-ins are extracted, my net profit between that online account and my live games was pretty solid though, enough that I didn't work for two years. My ex would go nuts though, she hated spending nights alone, while I grinded away at long tournaments. Ultimately it killed that relationship, and lead me here.

I ended up going back to work because I felt I was wasting my degree and with no gf, had extra time; but my pay was crappy, I hated the office atmosphere I was in, and kept playing on the side, hoping to hit a big enough tournament to stop working forever. That didn't happen, and even though I won an OK amount of money, I always felt like I lost a lot of time. Time that I could've spent pursuing things I really enjoyed... like music and girls (it's almost like we're twins).

I'll still play from time to time, but it's pretty rare now, I spend way more time on the other two things. On a personal note, I'm lucky to not be dealing with a dry spell; however, if you read the second paragraph of this post, my pussy reserve IS drying up, so it's just a matter of time if I don't make some moves! Not gonna let that happen though.