Post: #51

It's difficult to diagnose why you're having a hard time, Sargon. How would you say you come across? Direct and sexual? Gaijin-smash culturally insensitive? Are you emulating J-style in dress and manner? None of those are right or wrong. In my dress I was half-way Western and half-Japanese. Not super stylish but not clueless English teacher or tourist style either. Like to help but it's hard without seeing video or something of your approach.

Post: #52

Don't waste your weekends with them. Schedule them mid-week after work. They're dead tired and sick of work and will even go out for coffee at 7pm. Or you can do dinner. Sounds cliche and beta-ish but those people LOVE to eat, even their own food. And you're there partly to... explore their food. One running theme I did was looking for the best ramen in town. Or wanted to have fugu. Make fun of yourself when talking to them how you can't read the menus, how you tried to get from point A to point B and got lost for 4 hours, how everyone is so nice and friendly and helpful, how you're having a hard yet nice and fun time.

DO NOT try to emulate J-style clothing/dress/manner. J-girls don't like that even on J-guys (the ones I talked to at least). Don't dress retarded tourist style either. Just dress casual, regular jeans + tshirt/shirt will do just fine. But just as with game in other parts of the world maintain well-groomed'ness. Given their obsession with cleanness, this is more important here than in other parts of the world.

Another thing to take note is that Japan is a land of formal indirectness. Their whole culture was built on being as indirect as possible, and their language reflects it. You can talk for a long time and just make the point at the end of your statement. This is not a place you want to be in. This is the place of form for the Japanese people, the place of appearance, it's where substance can have nothing to say if they don't allow it. Which is why I said earlier to cut the politeness to the rawest form. You're a foreigner who they're LUCKY enough to be speaking SOME KIND OF Japanese (your advanced textbook japanese is actually hurting you) and so you can somewhat get away with this kind of shit as long as you're warm/friendly and smiling. When they call you yasashii then you're on the right track.

I say you best run it like this:
If she is obviously into you, then she is obviously into you. Trust me, you will know. She can be shy, reserved, not be able to say it cuz it's in a public place, but you will know. You will get stares, you will get giggling, you will get blushing, you will get talked about in japanese behind your back, called steki, kakoii, comments on your hot, big nose. You will know.

If she is not obviously into you, then she is your new friend. They love making friends, especially foreign ones. Approach her as usual, eventually the talk will come to be about you, talk about your homeland, talk about your adventures in japan so far, how it's hard yet fun, try to maintain the yasashii frame, talk about your next planned adventure, ask her if she's been there/done that and whether she likes it, and then ask her to join you, it would be fun. Most work all day and haven't gone to place x,y,z or don't usually do x,y,z stuff or usually eat the x,y,z dishes you have an unhealthy obsession with. Then when you meet her, just run the usual train, build comfort, be cool, be all yasashii and physically escalate over the course of the date. Remember, you're not really taking her out and being all beta on her, you're going on an adventure and bringing her along, either as a guide or to observe your wonder or to partake in the adventure herself. Just be a kid in a candy store. A big kid. By the end of it, you'll have bonded. The duality of you being the expedition leader thus saving her from making decisions, yet she has to provide various cultural/linguistic explanations for the various thingies and on occasion talking to people will make her feel you two are a team.

Try to go for the kiss at the end of date 1 but if it doesn't work don't ditch her just yet. Was it in a public place? Did she accept your kino? Were her friends around as well? Did she just sit there while you went all out perverted under her skirt? If so then she might just need a bit more warming up before she puts out. One she gets all nice and comfy with you she'll kiss you in public as well. Escalating to intercourse is not all that more difficult and imo the usual tactics work just fine. But it really comes quite naturally.

Post: #53

yea , it's hard to tell what you are doing. It sounds like most of your approaches are street approaches ?

Also what is your style ? I went suited down and had good success wearing a nice suit with pocket square. Now I wear stylish clothes. I also wear kind of a stubble on my face. Girls told me they like the unshaven look, and suit.

I recommend the bookstore, starbucks, grocery.

If you want an easy place to pick up girls.
Find a bookstore, then go to the English book section.
The girls in that section, are hit or miss though.
For me, it's a guaranteed number/chat/or date.

Also while your in that section waiting you can study japanese,
I pick up a book and steal sentences out of them, to use later if I need them. Sometimes if i'm lazy ill just take a picture of
the page with my ipod, and read later. Then a cute girl will walk by and i'll ask where the dictionaries are.

2nd place in the bookstore:
travel magazines section, foreign travel guides section.
these are the easiest places to pick up.

Also your foreigner status only gets you so far, as with all things. Height only gets you so far, looks only get you so far, style only so far, etc.

I would say the biggest factor is learning Japanese , that will be the biggest improvement to your game over here. Leave the TV on, the radio , and always be listening. You will catch on quick

Post: #54

I think I may have figured out one major factor influencing my recent shortcomings here. This is something that made it hard for me before I got into game and it still occasionally causes problems from time to time...Since I've been getting laid anyway in the past few years, I've kind of been ignoring it: I can occasionally come accross as way too serious.

You have to picture my physique along with it: I'm tall (especially for Japanese standards), very broad shouldered, short haired, and I've probably got the deepest voice you'll ever encounter in your life: literally, think Darth Vader, Wesley Snipes in Blade and a touch of Christian Bale in the Dark Knight to get an idea. Last night an American said I had the voice of Shaft. When I'm in the right mood, these things can actually play to my advantage, as I've had women in the past (mostly GFs, fuck buddies) refer to it as "sexy" and a turn on.

However, given that at certain times, I don't smile, look dead serious the entire time...some women, especially the cute and timid type...are said to have been intimidated by that. When I was a teenager, it scared the living ba-jesus out of girls my age. It was around the time I started getting into "game", if it can really even be called that, that I started learning from other guys how to use humor, teasing and sarcasm, and what difference something as simple and disarming as a smile can make. I have noticed that if I run into a cold streak of approaches, I get kind of miffed. This can create a vicious cycle, where I get unfriendly, which leads to more rejections, which makes me unfriendlier, and so on. I've noticed while smiling, I tend to get much nicer looks from J-girls on average. Sometimes, while chasing pussy, I forget really simple, basic things. At least it would appear to be a factor worth weighing in.

As far as style is concerned, I usually dress casually: jeans and button-up shirt. Usually nothing particularly fancy, but generally not sloppy either.

Namba Station
Decide to head down to follow up on Boo's recomendation and check out Grand Café. Take the metro to Namba Station and see this cute girl with an OK face but absolutely delectable legs. I open her outside the station, pretending to ask for directions. We chat a bit until suddenly this American chick runs up to me and shouts "Hey! Do you know where Giraffe is!?" I tell her where it is in English. While I'm talking the Japanese girl walks off. Three guy friends of hers (two Americans, one Frenchman) come up and say, jokingly "Shelly (forgot her real name) you cockblocking son-of-a-bitch, look what you just did." Funny people. I tell them how to get to Giraffe, have a few laughs, and proceed on my way. Could've gone with them, but I really prefer to role solo.

Sūn​ 孫 (Shinsaibashi, near Amemura)

While I'm walking towards Amemura I pass by this really cute girl and ask her how to get to Grand Café. She doesn't seem to know, but I can tell by her mannerisms that she's from China, so I switch to Chinese. We chat for about fifteen minutes. Since switching to Chinese she's been eye-fucking me and grinning. Asks if I've got QQ. I say no, but tell her to put in her number. Turns out she's just gotten off work (part time job at a Sushi-joint), I suggest we go to a bar together.
"No (actually, she said "不行 Bu xing"), it's too late. I won't make it home (the metro stops running at about 1:00 in Osaka). Let's meet up next week. I want you to teach me English." More eye-fucking.

"Teach me English." This has to be one of the best euphemisms Asian girls have ever come up with.

Sachiko (Grand Café, Amemura)

This was my third approach at Grand Café. 19 year old from Hyogo. Horrible fashion sense, plain face, I'd give her a 6 at best. We chat for a while, start dancing a bit. Make out after about two or three mintues into the approach. We remain in the corner devouring each other's tongues. I press her against the wall and start running my palm up her skirt. After about five to ten minutes of making out, I lead her by the hand upstairs to the wardrobe. There, I press her against the wall again and make out with her while fingering her pussy through her clothes. She starts moaning.

Hop in a cab and tell the guy to get me to the nearest love hotel. We make out more in the cab. She's kinda drunk though. After exiting the cab, we step into the hotel. I'm seconds away from reaching the Promised Land.

...No vacancies. Dammit!

We step out onto the street, make out in an alley again. I finger her some more with my right hand, rub her nipples with the left. She starts moaning louder. I'm seriously considering trying to fuck her right here in the alley (hey, it's worth a try, and there's no one outside except a few other horny couples, though it definitely wouldn't last long, since it's been over a month since the last time I got laid and I'm horny as hell, not to mention slightly drunk).

Walk into the adjacent love hotel. Look at the buttons indicating the room numbers. No vacancies? Not sure if I'm using this thing right.

Suddenly she gets a call. It's her sempai back at the club. Wants her to come back. She mumbles something. The sempai calls again. Now she wants to go back to the club.

"クラブに帰る。踊ろう Kurabu ni kaeru. Odorô? (going back to the club. Shall we dance?)”
What d'ya mean "dance"!? C'mon, let's go upstairs and "dance" there!
I make out with her some more (get them horny enough and you can usually override all common sense, she'll practically rip your clothes off for you). She's not horny enough, though. Pulls me into the cab and tells the driver to go back to Grand Café...





At least she paid the cab fare this time. Meets up with her friends. I'm still thinking I can salvage this somehow. Nothing. Her last words are "bye-bye".

You'd think I'd be depressed and blueballed from this. On the contrary.
It's around 3:30 in the morning. Inside the Starbucks at Ebisubashi, listening to the drunken laughter of the teenage guitarists and skateborders outside while observing the near comatose Japanese club goers nod off around me, I sip from the warm cup of coffee in my hand and lean back with a wide grin on my face.

From Starbucks I walk back to the subway station at Shinsaibashi, only to find that it's closed off. Walking back, I hear a familiar voice shouting "There's that guy you cockblocked earlier tonight!" It's the three Americans and the Frenchman. We walk around hitting on every Japanese girl passing by until about five in the morning. These aren't approaches, it's mainly just for laughs. It's about six in the morning by the time I go to bed. Got a date scheduled for tonight (we'll see if she flakes or not).

So far, that makes...

72 approaches (48 night, 24 day), 13 numbers, 1 date, 0 bangs (currently about 7 prospects).

Post: #55

Really you got a cab to look for love hotels?
Do a day walkabout around Dotonbori during the daytime and locate the venues. it's full of them. Waiting around for cabs to go on those tight one way roads in the area is time a-wasted and risking her getting called.
Anyway, that was really kindof unlucky. I've never run into rabuhoteru being full.

It might not be totally unsalvageable. I had to quit going to grand cafe because this one girl I started seeing was going there every weekend and pretty much ruined potential game for me there. She might actually still be going there to this very day. From what I noticed grand cafe clientele are pretty regular so you might run into her again next time.

Anyway, keep it up. You're making progress. Despair not, that place is a gold mine if you have the right pickaxe.

Post: #56

damn , i'm rooting for you sargon, it will happen.

Post: #57

(05-04-2013 09:49 AM)memcpy Wrote:  damn , i'm rooting for you sargon, it will happen.

Thanks, I'm certain it will.

(05-04-2013 04:43 AM)boo Wrote:  I had to quit going to grand cafe because this one girl I started seeing was going there every weekend and pretty much ruined potential game for me there.

I hate it when that happens. I remember in Beijing I had that problem with a girl who would frequent a club called Red/红酒吧. I'd always have to be careful and look over my shoulder, lest I run into her if I went there.

Another time I pulled a girl from another club in BJ, wanted to get her in my rotation, but I eventually ran right past her in the same club while I had another girl on my arm...embaressing.

-----------------

So far that makes...

73 approaches (48 night, 25 day), 14 numbers, 2 dates (about 6 current prospects), 0 bangs

Post: #58

Any advice on housing there?

I plan to fly to Osaka and need an apartment there. AirBNB doesn´t have a good offer. Should be studio/1-BR, zentral, ~2k$.

Post: #59

Sargon, quick question offtopic.
What do you recommend for ease of game and quality of women (both looks and personality)? Shanghai or Beijing?
My chinese is basic conversational-ish but will likely get better by next year when I'm planning my trip.

Post: #60

Wait for it...wait for it...





I think I'll play this video each time I bang a new girl here.

First notch in Osaka!!!

Last night (2013/5/5) and this morning (2013/5/6). It was with "Fumi" (the 39-year old) from Pure mentioned earlier. Long story short, I met with her at SSB, went to Bar Zerro and to this other club (I think it was called Sam and Dave's). Almost no making out the entire time. Suddenly we take a cab back to her place. Banged shortly after. All in all, I'm glad to have broken the dryspell, but I don't need to see this chick again, she had a wierd vibe, was too fucking old, played these wierd resistence games in bed, couldn't stand her personality, sex was boring, horrible kisser, and she smelled funny...but still, I'm glad to have gotten my first kill in Osaka/Japan.

This experience has reminded me that it's important for me to actually enjoy the company of the women I sleep with. Other guys can do what they want, but I always have the fondest memories of the girls with whom I had good sex and with whom I had fun with outside the bedroom.

Either way, I've set the following (sex related) goals for this year (not to say that my only goals for this year are sex-related):
1.) fuck at least five cute J-girls (i.e. 7+) in a row
2.) establish a stable rotation of at least three cute girls
3.) get over 10 notches from Osaka (definitely seems doable)
3.) bang a cute (18-ish) J-schoolgirl in uniform

After leaving Fumi's house, I spent the day sightseeing around SSB and Tennoji. Only approached one (cute) cross-eyed girl.

So far, that makes...

75 approaches (27 day, 48 night), 15 numbers, 3 dates, 1 bang (4 solid prospects at the moment)

Post: #61

(05-05-2013 03:04 AM)boo Wrote:  Sargon, quick question offtopic.
What do you recommend for ease of game and quality of women (both looks and personality)? Shanghai or Beijing?
My chinese is basic conversational-ish but will likely get better by next year when I'm planning my trip.

Sorry, I've never been to Shanghai, so I can't say how the girls are there.

The quality of the women in Beijing is overall pretty good. The only complaint is that you'll often find girls with an extremely tacky sense of fashion (generalization of course). Unlike Osaka, however, I don't remember seeing as many superficial and high maintnance women. As far as difficulty is concerned, the girls are relatively easy. The really hot girls can, of course be a different story. Of course, this will all depend on somewhat on your individual vibe and personality as well as the way you come across. I'd say if you did well in Osaka, you should do well anywhere in China.

In general the second tier cities are going to be the easiest, as foreigner status in big international cities like Beijing is less present. Language skills are a must, but I can't say much about using Engliish in China, since I rarely did so. There are guys who can tell you a lot more about these things than I can, though, and I think it's best to check the numerous China related threads on this forum.

Post: #62

Wait so you're saying Osaka has superficial, high maintenance women? In what sense?
They can care a lot about appearance and all but I found J-girls in Osaka to be rather on the sweet side than anything else. And although they like going out and places and stuff not once did I have to pay for them (night-pulls to love hotels are a different story). They get the "I'm a poor student", "Japan is so expensive" story quite early in our interaction.
Thanks, just wanted some feedback from ppl who've been there

Post: #63

(05-06-2013 10:12 AM)boo Wrote:  Wait so you're saying Osaka has superficial, high maintenance women? In what sense?
They can care a lot about appearance and all but I found J-girls in Osaka to be rather on the sweet side than anything else. And although they like going out and places and stuff not once did I have to pay for them (night-pulls to love hotels are a different story). They get the "I'm a poor student", "Japan is so expensive" story quite early in our interaction.
Thanks, just wanted some feedback from ppl who've been there

I definitely see lots of sweet and natural girls here, but I also come across plenty of women with a very superficial vibe to them. These are usually the type that dye their hair blond and put on fake contacts and way to much makeup, wear fake nails, fake eyelashes, etc. You usually see these girls around Shinsaibashi and Namba. Occasionally you'll find some of them hanging around Hep5 as well. I'm not saying most Japanese women are like this. The majority are usually very stylish, classy and generally tend to carry themselves well. It's just that the sleezy bitches make up one of the many subspecies of Japanese women you seem to find often around Osaka.

It seems most East Asian chicks in general (Chinese, Japanese, and S. Korean) seem to insist on splitting the bills, at least with me. Of the thirteen Asian women I've either slept with, dated, or been in a relationship with, I can only remember one who didn't insist on splitting the bill each time.

Post: #64

same here, they love splitting the bill and sometimes pay for my meal without asking. If they don't offer to split when the time comes then I know something is wrong.

Post: #65

I don't know Osaka well but if it is anything like the rest of Japan street approaches seem like the absolutely least effective way to meet women, especially since you mention that personality is somewhat important to you. Did you say you're a university student? If so, it seems you could just target the different classes/organizations full of girls seeking foreigners (e.g., take a class in a European language, do language exchanges - basically anything obviously "intercultural"). If you're German (?), basically any German themed activities will just be a buffet of girls with a German fetish.

Most Japanese girls are paranoid about men (and Japan does have a fair number of perverts) so if you are limiting yourself to girls willing to go fuck a guy they meet on the street, you are looking at a pretty small market. If you want to approach random girls, at least go to the part of town that caters to foreigners and hang out at a cafe or bar. That way you can have a decent conversation, it doesn't scare her off by making it obvious you are hunting for women, and many of the girls there will be actively looking for men and advertising the fact by studying English in a public place.

Post: #66

Congrats on the first bang. So what if it was a smelly 39 year old, at least you got it out of your system and it helped you to define your goals.

I will be coming to Osaka/Nagoya for two months this summer as part of an English teaching camp thing through my school. It seems like my job will consist of being a big dumb American that little Japanese kids get to poke and laugh at. Outside of the camps they will set me up with a home stay with a family, which could prove to be quite odd, as well as hotels which means I will get a little free time.

Do you have any advice for a newcomer to Japan/Osaka as far as what to bring, how to prepare myself etc? I'm glad to hear you just wear a button up and jeans because I think the Japanese dude style is extremely gay.

Post: #67

Completed my 110th approach last night. Before I get into that, here's a quick overview of the past few weeks.

After "Fumi", I was met with another dry spell, and a quite depressing one, at that. I'm talking rejections, blowouts and more blowouts. Fortunately, a quick examination of my approaches seems to give me somewhat of an understanding of what I need to do differently.

So far, I've approached women in the following types of venues...
Clubs: 81, resulting in 3 numbers, about 3 makeouts and 1 bang
Street: 22, resulting in 8 numbers and 2 Dates
Coffee Shops: 7, resulting in 6 numbers and 2 dates

It seems lemmo was right about street approaches, despite getting numbers from a bit less thanhalf the women I appproached, they are not very useful ways of meeting women. Most girls here seem wary of nampa, and most Japanese guys run nampa on the street.

Clubs here have reminded me of how important venue selection can be. To give you an idea, here's a breakdown of the clubs I've been frequenting.

Pure (approaches: 51)
This is a standard hip-hop club, with about 50% foreigners and 50% Japense. Most of the women there are locals, though. The girls you find here are usually the type that have watched too many American gangsta rap videos and are trying to copy this "straight from da hood" type of image.
Although I got my first bang from this joint, I also experienced the highest percentge of blowouts here. I mean quite literally walking away or ignoring you the moment the first syllable comes out of your mouth. You might think me a bit stupid for continuing to visit a place where I get shot down so frequently, and you might be right. I mainly went here for the all-you-can-drink and for the fact that it remained open till 5:00 AM. I won't be returning there again in the near future, though.

Grand Café (Approaches: 11)This place is mostly frequented by an all Japanese crowd, and generally features either electro music. I decided to try this place out a few more times since I nearly pulled a girl from this place after only a few approaches. Although the clientelle tend to be pretty friendly, this place suffers from one big problem: it's almost always empty. For an average sized club I've never seen more than 15-20 people there (never more than about 5 women) on weekends, leaving me with few options.

Joule (approaches: 5)
This club is less than a minutes walk from Grand Café. It's fairly big, with three stories, and it generally seems to play a mix of hip-hop, reggae and electro. About a third of the crowd is foreign. The quality of the women is generally good, but I didn't have any luck here. You don't really seem to see anyone hooking up here either.

Sam&Dave (approaches: 12)
I've definitely experienced the best results here. This is generally the type of "meat market" I look for when I'm looking for a clubt to meet girls. The first night I walked into the club I made out with the second girl I approached, and ground on the dancefloor with the third. Last night (my second visit) was no different. Despite having a similar vibe and crowd as Pure, it is much easier. It is basically an even mix of foreign and Japanese. The music generally leans toward hip-hop and RnB, but not as much as Pure. The quality can vary greatly however. You just need to be a bit selective.

Last night, I came close to banging my second girl. She was not pretty (actually, I'd give her a 5). We wanted to go to a love hotel, but I only had about 3000 left on me while she was on 1000). Both of our homes were too far and too expensive by cab, so she called up a friend to ask if we could crash at he place. No luck. Eventually we went back inside and left with another friend from her club. 39 years old, but hot as fuck. It kind of sucks to pull a below average girl from a club only to see her friend who's much hotter than her. We exchanged numbers and she told me to call her so we could meet up during the week. No way I'm calling this one. I can't keep sleeping with girls I find unattractive, and I'm actually glad I didn't smash this one. If I had a part of me would have probably died on the inside. I really have to be more selective. The weird Thing is, she looked a lot worse when we walked outside (damn those dim club lights!!).

Lessons learned:
- If your logistics are shit, bring more money (or at least an ATM card) when you go out.
- It is important for me to keep a healthy balance between quality and quantity (too much of the former and you'll be dry more often than not, too much of the latter and...well...yuck).
- Be mindful of venue selection. The best game in the world won't help you if you can't even finish your first sentence without getting shot down or if the local crowd just otherwise isn't feeling you.

So far, that makes...
110 Approaches, 19 numbers, 6 dates, 3 makeouts, 1 bang...

Post: #68

Wow, I haven't checked this thread much so I didn't know you were documenting all your approaches and results like you are doing, good work on that. However I find it shocking the approach success ratio to be so low. Anyways, I hope you begin to get much better results soon.

Quote:Funding:

I think I already mentioned this one. I'm getting a stipend from the Japanese university: it includes free housing, no tuition, plus a monthly paymnt. I was only able to get this through an exchange program between my university in Germany and the one here in Osaka.

Can you tell us how you managed to do make this work? Did you do all the paperwork/required procedures online? I'm really curious about this.

Really liking this thread even though I don't think I'm gonna hit Japan anytime soon, keep up the great work.

Post: #69

I was considering going to Japan for abt a week, but after reading this thread I am not so sure.

Post: #70

(06-02-2013 01:18 PM)Brodiaga Wrote:  I was considering going to Japan for abt a week, but after reading this thread I am not so sure.

Everyone's results will vary. Scott, Mempcy, Rawgod and other RVF members based in Japan have no doubt experienced better outcomes.

Whatever it is about me that seems to turn off the average Japanese chic does not seem to apply as much to other countries. I mean, yes, I experienced occasional cold streaks in China and Germany, but nothing close to what I've encountered here.

I will never give up, and I am certain I'll be able to hook up with several more girls during the ten months I have left here, but right now I cannot see myself remaining in Japan indefinitely beyond the following year. Don't get me wrong, I do enjoy it here, and I know it may sound silly to choose my country of residence based on ease of getting laid, but if you're constantly going hungry where you live, it's time to move. I hope I am proven wrong in the future. Japan is a great place to experience, I'm glad I came and I'm still looking forward to my remaining time here. If this one area were like it is for me in other places, I'd be certain to lengthen my stay.

(06-02-2013 01:18 PM)Brodiaga Wrote:  [...] buy a ticket to BKK and pipeline on Thaifriendly, that's my advice.

I would like to check out SEA one day (for many reasons, not just the girls), but I'm not about to leave for Thailand any time soon. Also, there's no guarantee Thailand will be any better. Japan is hailed by many as punani paradise, as well. Though I was skeptical of the hype when I came here, I expected moderate results, just the same. One thing this place has shown me is that "paradise" is relative, and you can never be certain how you'll do in any given country until you set foot there yourself.

This makes me very curious about South Korea. I've read Dash's ramblings about how he couldn't get laid there, and others have said how difficult Korean girls can be (I've only hooked up with one girl from S. Korea, so that's not much of a sample for me to judge by). I'd like to test this and see if I can't get on the ferry from Osaka to Busan sometime this summer. Considering how warm the Korean students (both male and female) here in Japan have been towards me, I'm interested in seeing what my results over there will be. One Korean friend of mine in Osaka said I should get laid like a king over there as a white dude, but I always take those claims with a pinch of salt. Will I experience a blowout-marathon like in Japan, or will I have the opposite results of Dash? It would be a fun experiment. Either way, it can't be much more of a challenge than this place.

Post: #71

Sargon, thanks for sharing your adventures in such a detailed way!

I have been to Osaka a couple of times and have no knowledge of Japanese. I found it very frustrating to see the crossed over arms instantly when I brought out my opener in English. Girls were smiling but I actually gave up at some point.

Given that you speak Japanese I was expecting you to have an easier time actually but Japan is a though place for all of us seemingly (so is South Korean).

Post: #72

what are the best sites to pipeline for an upcoming trips to Japan? Is online dating big in Japan?

Post: #73

(06-02-2013 10:19 AM)FretDancer Wrote:  Can you tell us how you managed to do make this work? Did you do all the paperwork/required procedures online? I'm really curious about this.

OK, this started out when I found out about a woman I'd known from uni who was studying abroad in Korea. A lecturer of mine (a German, who was the wife of my Japanese teacher), started telling me about exchange programs and stipends between my university and several foreign universities, including those in South Korea and Japan. Since I'm interested in East Asia, I enjoy travelling and wanted an oportunity to improve my Japanese while getting to know the culture here, I asked around at the International Office about exchange programs for Japan.

Turns out there were three major partner universities in Japan: one in Tokyo, one in Kyoto, and one shitty little university in Osaka. The one in Tokyo offered a years' stipend of about 900,000 yen and exception from tuition fees, but you still had to find an appartment and pay your own rent, and from what I hear about Tokyo, that can get pretty tight.

Ritsumeikan University in Kyoto also offered exception from tuition costs, but otherwise you were on your own financially. Basically, as a poor student who made an income from part time jobs, that was completely out of the question. The last university offered the most enticing deal: monthly stipend of 80,000 yen, free acccomodation, free water and electricity, and no tuition fees. It was obvious which one I went for.

The woman at the International Office told me which forms to print out from their website, which documents they required from me, etc. This included all sorts of shit that had me running back and forth for months. In the mean time I got together with this Japanese girl who'd recently arrived in Germany about a month or so prior. She helped a bit with the documents the university in Japan wanted me to fill out for them, all of which were in Japanese (thank GOD I studied Chinese before and could decifer most of the Kanji, but it was still a pain in the ass).

Months go by. Oh, the Japanese university needs more documents from me. Another month. Oops, this line wasn't filled out properly. Next month. Oh, another thing. All this paperwork has me running back and forth trying to get this shit filled out by whichever deadline they set. They even wanted a blood test from me and x-rays of my lungs for some reason.

FINALLY, about a month before I'm supposed to be flying over here, the official approval from the university arrives, which allows me to apply for a student visa at the Japanese consulate in Munich (mind you, I first applied for this thing in September 2012). I run my ass over to Munich, get my student visa, and less than a week later, I hop on a plane from Munich to Kansai International via Doha (Qatar). And here I am, enjoying the culture and the overall experience but still marching through a vast desert in search of water (that isn't 39 years old and doesn't smell of stale perfume in a dusty attic).

(06-01-2013 02:53 PM)bounce Wrote:  Do you have any advice for a newcomer to Japan/Osaka as far as what to bring, how to prepare myself etc? I'm glad to hear you just wear a button up and jeans because I think the Japanese dude style is extremely gay.

Well, the first and probably the most important thing you can do is learn as much of the language as you can, and don't expect to get by with English here. My roommate from Nepal is a prime example. Speaks perfect English but not a word of Japanese, and he had an even harder time here than I did. Even though I'm conversational in the language, I still relied on all the Chinese students to help me around in the first few weeks.

Sometimes the Japanese will try to use whatever English words they know when explaining something to you. The problem is a.) they only use words you'd probably know already know while still speaking rapidly with whatever complex words you don't know. B.) they mistranlate their own words often: they first say "Minami" (South) and then translate that into "West" (which sounds more like "Uésuto"), or they'll say "left" while pointing right etc. C.) they'll pronounce English words in a highly katakanized accent, so "straight" becomes "sutoreito" and "left" becomes "réhuto".

In short, learn the language!

As far as style is concerned, I can only speak for myself. Whether the effects of this are positive, negative or neutral I can't really say. I haven't spoken to that many Westerners in person while here in Japan, so I don't have a very good impression of what works for them.

You're right that this "gay", Prince/Michael-Jacksonesque image is considered fashionable among some Japanese heterosexual men. If you saw a lot of the guys here (especially male celebrities) in any other part of the world, there would be no doubt whatsoever that he was gay, in fact you'd have a very hard time convincing people that some of the extreme cases were actually into women. Here, it's just a particular type of fashion statement.

Post: #74

Sargon do you know of any white guy in your social circle or otherwise that gets laid like you feel you should? It just seems like you have everything going for you but are not seeing the results you should.

Post: #75

(06-03-2013 08:11 AM)Menace Wrote:  Sargon do you know of any white guy in your social circle or otherwise that gets laid like you feel you should? It just seems like you have everything going for you but are not seeing the results you should.

Actually I don't know any white guys here. My housemates are a beta Taiwanese guy, a married Nepali man and a Chinese girl. All the friends and acquaintances I've made here are either South Korean, Chinese or Japanese (which is good, for the most part). There's one old German lady I see once a week, and an old Austrian professor I've exchanged words with twice or so. Other than that, I'm basically the only non-Asian for miles (again, no complaints with this, as it offers excellent language practice in both Chinese and Japanese).

About two weeks ago I chatted with an Australian, a Brit (?) and a Frenchman who were apparently based in Tokyo. All relatively decent looking. Oddly enough, the Aussie said he found it harder to get laid in Japan, too, but to my surpise, he said it was because the girls here were too "shy" and "conservative". In the context of nightclubs in Osaka, this baffled me, as the average 20 year old girl you see at Namba and Umeda is anything but conservative, with skirts so short they call into question the very definition of the term "clothing".