Post: #1

Men, it is bonus time around wall street, and I need to get this off my chest.

First a little background information, I have been working in offices for the last 6 1/2 years. I have worked for several large financial firms, and now the last 3 at the same company.

Like I said in the title, "90% of Office Workers have completely no LIFE"

I would say about 2-3% workout. I usually meet about ONE person from every company that becomes my workout/happy hour wing man, and every other single person is a fat loser......Some facts that I have observed.

• Most office workers are married and pretty traditional.
  

• They look like they haven't had sex in 15 years
  

• The men either have a comb over, or a horse pattern baldness
  

• They bitch and moan all day long, but then every monday morning they tell me they "stayed home"
  

• They own real estate where their parents helped them with the downpayment, and now they are in credit card hell
  

I honestly can't believe that most office workers can look themselves in the mirror every morning with a straight face. I work on the 39th floor, and I seriously consider jumping out the window at least twice a week.

Why else do I hate them? We work 3 blocks away from the South Street Seaport in Manhattan, with a million dollar view of the brooklyn and manhattan bridges. I go outside to the water for lunch almost every single day of the year that it isn't raining. In the summer I tan all day and stare at hot European tourists.

Office workers? They stay inside and use the employee cafeteria 365 days a year. WE ARE IN MANHATTAN!!!! GO O U T S I D E........

And now, bonus time: The month before bonus season the office workers start losing their minds. They start gossiping, people get laid off, arguements start, bickering, etc.

Do you know why? Because nobody saves any money except me. These idiots are all close to, or bankrupt already. "And I'm not lying about them being bankrupt, if you have a stock brokers license you need to disclose your bankruptcy so I see it all the time"

So what is good about working in an office?

A) You get paid to work while sitting on your ass. I worked at some physical jobs for years, and they really kill you after a while

B) The young, single, wall st women are pretty slutty. Like I said before, everyone ends up married on wall st, so the young finance girls are dieing for penis...

Later

Post: #2

(01-25-2013 11:14 PM)TheCaptainPower Wrote:  Men, it is bonus time around wall street, and I need to get this off my chest.

First a little background information, I have been working in offices for the last 6 1/2 years. I have worked for several large financial firms, and now the last 3 at the same company.

Like I said in the title, "90% of Office Workers have completely no LIFE"

I would say about 2-3% workout. I usually meet about ONE person from every company that becomes my workout/happy hour wing man, and every other single person is a fat loser......Some facts that I have observed.

• Most office workers are married and pretty traditional.
  

• They look like they haven't had sex in 15 years
  

• The men either have a comb over, or a horse pattern baldness
  

• They bitch and moan all day long, but then every monday morning they tell me they "stayed home"
  

• They own real estate where their parents helped them with the downpayment, and now they are in credit card hell
  

I honestly can't believe that most office workers can look themselves in the mirror every morning with a straight face. I work on the 39th floor, and I seriously consider jumping out the window at least twice a week.

Why else do I hate them? We work 3 blocks away from the South Street Seaport in Manhattan, with a million dollar view of the brooklyn and manhattan bridges. I go outside to the water for lunch almost every single day of the year that it isn't raining. In the summer I tan all day and stare at hot European tourists.

Office workers? They stay inside and use the employee cafeteria 365 days a year. WE ARE IN MANHATTAN!!!! GO O U T S I D E........

And now, bonus time: The month before bonus season the office workers start losing their minds. They start gossiping, people get laid off, arguements start, bickering, etc.

Do you know why? Because nobody saves any money except me. These idiots are all close to, or bankrupt already. "And I'm not lying about them being bankrupt, if you have a stock brokers license you need to disclose your bankruptcy so I see it all the time"

So what is good about working in an office?

A) You get paid to work while sitting on your ass. I worked at some physical jobs for years, and they really kill you after a while

B) The young, single, wall st women are pretty slutty. Like I said before, everyone ends up married on wall st, so the young finance girls are dieing for penis...

Later

Get a remote-working gig: you'll be infinitely happier.

You don't have to listen to inane conversations all day. No more babysitting colleagues who can't learn their jobs.

I don't care about bonus season anymore. I'm 33 and have saved so much cash that I could live a comfortable existence for quite some time.

I hate sitting around all day with barely anything to do. I feel like my talents and energy are being squandered. But my bank keeps showering me with money, because I'm the best worker. So I'm tethered.

I just got promoted to management. I'm giving it a try but will stay three more years. Then I'm done.

Post: #3

Quote:90% of office workers people have NO LIFE...

Fixed it for you.

Post: #4

(01-26-2013 12:07 AM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

Quote:90% of office workers people have NO LIFE...

Fixed it for you.

That's why it's our jobs to live a life of 10 men. There's life/social energy that needs to expressed. The 99% thing is not just about money in this country; it's also true with sex, fame, and general quality of life.

In this sense, we are the 1%-ers of the sexual market. I'm turning into the Madoff of pussy.

Post: #5

(01-25-2013 11:14 PM)TheCaptainPower Wrote:  

• They own real estate where their parents helped them with the downpayment, and now they are in credit card hell
  

Another argument in favour of renting?

Post: #6

I might never own.....My jobs keep moving from city to city within the tri-state area.

My rent is $750, and I am saving money like a drug lord.....

I don't care about a bonus anymore either, this is what I got so far:

2008: 10K
2009: 5K
2010: ZERO
2011: ZERO
2012: 3K

Welcome to the great world of finance!!!!

(Although the 401k matches were pretty sweet)

Post: #7

If you're rent is so cheap then you're living in Jersey City/Bayonne or somewhere deep in Brooklyn. With roommates.

Mind if I ask what you do?

Post: #8

Bay Ridge, Brooklyn.....One roommate, $750 each. I work in finance back office slavery...

You guy's wouldnt believe the shit people fight about all day. I couldn't give 2 shits.

I started working out everyday at lunch now, since its freezing out, then I take 5 shits a day to check the PUA updates.

Don't get me wrong, if you are young and broke and get an offer for an office job take it and save money, but it really, really sucks...

Post: #9

(01-26-2013 12:29 AM)TheCaptainPower Wrote:  Bay Ridge, Brooklyn.....One roommate, $750 each. I work in finance back office slavery...

Those are shitty logistics. How do you get girls to come back to Bay Ridge from the East Village? How do you navigate the roommate situation?

Post: #10

Bay ridge is great, ton's of bars, and quick cab to the city. I am a life long Brooklyn resident, so its not a problem. I take the train to manhattan probably 6x a week, I know nyc like the back of my hand. We have two bedrooms so It isn't a problem with the ladies.

The benefit of living in Brooklyn is that I have a car, in Manhattan it's really hard to have a car....I can head out to seaside heights, hamptons, atlantic city no problem.

Post: #11

I have an office gig myself. It's a traveling finance job. Pay is pretty good and he bennies are top notch.

The women are DEFINITELY complainers though. Every time I hear a coworker woman complain its music to my ears. My field is male dominated at the upper end because women just quit.

The trick to office jobs is staying shape, using all the amenities when traveling, get out of the office during the day (DO NOT EAT AT YOUR DESK), and prioritize spending for cool shit.

Post: #12

(01-26-2013 12:14 AM)soup Wrote:  

(01-26-2013 12:07 AM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

Quote:90% of office workers people have NO LIFE...

Fixed it for you.

That's why it's our jobs to live a life of 10 men. There's life/social energy that needs to expressed. The 99% thing is not just about money in this country; it's also true with sex, fame, and general quality of life.

In this sense, we are the 1%-ers of the sexual market. I'm turning into the Madoff of pussy.

Excellent point, we need to live it up so the 99% can live vicariously through us. Talk about your vacations, share all those pictures with hotties in your arms, when some dude complains about his wife spending all his money drop the line, "fortunately I do not have that problem."

Post: #13

I worked in a brokerage near the back office department for a couple years, the way you describe your co-workers rings a lot of bells. Even in a small energetic ad agency where everyone was sub-30 years old I hated my life and most people were mostly just as boring, only they were married to their jobs rather than to a home life.

I eventually ended up quitting an office job with no prospects and 3 months of savings because I physically couldn't stand it anymore. I mean I enjoyed life more as a dish washer. The alarm would go off in the morning and I would literally feel pain in my chest after realizing what the next 12 hours of my life would be spent doing.

Now after years of flying solo I can't remember how I did it for as long as I did. Then again, I'm the kind of guy that really enjoys working by myself -- it's not for everyone.

Post: #14

Stone Street always gives me such false hopes when I'm working on the street (company HQ's on Water by the heliport). You see a lot of people, think "this is great!", go in to have a fun time...

aaaand a couple hours later you realize you're like one of 15 people left in FiDi after midnight. Place is a ghost-town. You're right - most people I know on the street are married or just criminally boring. Even wall street reflects this fact after market hours.

Post: #15

(01-26-2013 08:27 AM)Wool Suit Wrote:  Stone Street always gives me such false hopes when I'm working on the street (company HQ's on Water by the heliport). You see a lot of people, think "this is great!", go in to have a fun time...

aaaand a couple hours later you realize you're like one of 15 people left in FiDi after midnight. Place is a ghost-town. You're right - most people I know on the street are married or just criminally boring. Even wall street reflects this fact after market hours.

I wish more people knew about Stone St. It's a real hidden gem in the city.

Post: #16

I remote work so i don't have to deal with boring co-workers. That and i can sleep in until noon.

Post: #17

I hear you mate. I work in Barclays in London doing graphic design so I have first hand experience with the banker cunts. Their diet is horrible, their lives are shitty and they are all betas. There's literally 3 out of about 150 bankers on my floor that I can bear talking to.

These guys think they're living the life but I've seen them working anywhere between 15-20 hours a day and they still come in on weekends for something similar. Cogs in a machine with no personalities, honest to God. There is no charisma to be found in these buildings because they all adhere to the cringey propaganda and "beliefs" the bank enforces onto them.

Post: #18

What's your position title? Friends of mine who do networking for a trading company get quarterly bonus which range from 15-30k. Yes that's atleast 45k a year in bonuses

Post: #19

My building is connected to stone street, it's OK over there, no big deal. I like the places a little bit further up like John St bar and grill (althought its a different name now), and Nassau st bar, whitehorse tavern, etc.

Midtown happy hours are a lot better...

I do the wall st race every year, and for my company its always me and my wing man from work who finish pretty high up, and the rest of the company is always about 20 minutes behind, lol.....I'm surprised none of them have a heart attack.

Post: #20

(01-25-2013 11:14 PM)TheCaptainPower Wrote:  

• [only] 2-3% workout.

• Most office workers are married and pretty traditional [and] look like they haven't had sex in 15 years [and] every monday morning they tell me they "stayed home"
  

• The men either have a comb over, or a horse pattern baldness
  

• They own real estate where their parents helped them with the downpayment, and now they are in credit card hell
  

Lack of healthy diet/exercise is a big problem.

I don't care if they look like they don't have sex. If they don't crave variety and marry their dream girl, then they can stay home and fuck her on weekends. This is not a problem.

Male pattern baldness is genetic, not a job effect!

Apartments cost over $1MM in Manhattan, so I can understand a young couple needing help with a downpayment. But I can't condone credit card hell.

I assure you that successful (front office) guys on Wall Street are banking 6-figure bonuses. The problems happen to untalented, undermotivated guys. If you are too fat and bald to get girls in clubs, then you might get a mediocre but "respectable" back-office job at some "prestigious" financial firm. This is true even if you don't have a great degree and career. You aren't getting girls anyway, so it doesn't matter whether you work 40 hours or 60+ hours per week. Given the cost of living, $100K is nothing in Manhattan. So the only guys who would take those jobs have nothing better to do.

Soup reported a great social life as a musician in Brooklyn. Hurricane Katrina showed how many seemingly stable middle-class families were only two paychecks from financial destitution. Too many guys lack the ambition to make choices about lifestyle.

Post: #21

This thread has been great just for a insight into NYC office rat life. I've always wanted to work in NYC on a Internship I am just not sure how feasible it is for me being a Canadian ( ? ).

Post: #22

(01-26-2013 12:40 PM)kosko Wrote:  This thread has been great just for a insight into NYC office rat life. I've always wanted to work in NYC on a Internship I am just not sure how feasible it is for me being a Canadian ( ? ).

You'll have your work cut out for you. H1B1 visas are costly and high in demand.

Unless you want to cut your teeth in marketing, advertising, finance or corporate law, I would advise you to stay away. But the job market for the aforementioned positions is without question world class.

If you're in Finance, then Scotia Capital is making a push into the market. RBC as well. They employ mostly Canadians.

Brookfield Properties is becoming the premier Office REIT in America. They're headquartered at WFC. I'm very impressed by this organization: it's professional, competent, and has a great track record.

But my advice in another post still stands: if you're in your 20s and just starting out, Hong Kong is leaps and bounds better than NYC. If you move there, I expect you to buy me a drink in a few years thanking me.

/thread-2122-p...#pid356273

Post: #23

I agree, stay in Canada. I actually overheard a couple employees saying they are applying for jobs in Toronto...

If you are just starting off in the finance I honestly think the ONLY way to get employed is to work with a temp agency like Kelly or Manpower, etc. Thats's how I originally got hired out of grad school. I was making $19 an hour to temp, and I started drinking with my Irish Director and when something opened up he got me in.

I'd love to work front office, but its easier said than done. I'm 0 for 3 on interviews in the last 2 years, a lot of people looking for jobs.

That's why its important to diversify. I was looking at real estate in Seaside Heights with my cousin before this hurricane, and of course I just published my first book.

I think finance is going to keep shrinking in the next 20 years and become more and more automated...

Post: #24

(01-26-2013 01:15 PM)TheCaptainPower Wrote:  the ONLY way to get employed is to work with a temp agency like Kelly or Manpower ... out of grad school.

I'm 0 for 3 on interviews in the last 2 years

Ummm, no. You could get a good degree, or you could develop skills, or you could network. Actually, you did a bit of networking with your temp boss to get your current position. But you can do so much more. Your career passion isn't close to your fitness passion.

Serious, only three interviews in two years? You should be going to school part-time, getting CFA certification, attending industry meetings, volunteering for extra work projects so you can network. Instead you chose to write a fitness book that is probably not particularly different from existing books.

Post: #25

@Divorco I agree with you 110% that my fitness passion is stronger than my career passion, but I don't want you to think that I have been sitting on my ass...

I got my MBA a couple years ago going part time after work. I also took a couple certifications and passed. But I definately lost the passion, that's why I'm not pushing as much for the CFA and industry meetings, etc. I'm SLOWLY working on leaving the industry eventually.

I only interviewed 3x because it has to be a really good reason for me to leave. I'm a year away from vesting on some pension and 401k stuff, so not putting myself out there as much. Also if they lay me off I get a decent severence check.

I'm not dumb, I turned 33 last month and I saved close to $200K working in an office, but eventually I'd like to do something different and something I have a passion in.

And BTW, in 7 years I've never seen anyone hired straight from College.....We wouldn't even interview them