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Teddykgb Offline
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How to respond to this message?
Ok so I met this chick like 5 - 6 weeks ago and we started hanging out and banging and then 1 week ago I came to Thailand because I told her I already had this trip planned. We have sent a few messages back and forth for the last week but she sent me this today.

"Murrb!! I hope you know I miss you & I wish I knew what we were....I really like you and I hope when you come back we can figure out everything...I'm just letting you know Im going out tonight with Sarah and her fiancé and their friend Tommy. I don't want to potentially ruin what me & you have so let me know if you have an issue with this. I really wish you were not across the world or that we had the relationship talk before you left...who knows you might not care what I do but I'm just letting you know...I really really really miss you & I can't wait for you to come home already."

What do I say back? I dont really care what she does but I still want to be able to have sex with her when I get back in 3 weeks or so.
01-25-2013 09:31 PM
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FourToTheFloor Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
Its a shit test to gauge your reaction. Not sure how to respond though.
01-25-2013 09:36 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 09:36 PM)FourToTheFloor Wrote:  Its a shit test to gauge your reaction. Not sure how to respond though.

Yep I knew it was a shit test thats why I'm not really sure what to say. I'm trying to find something to say that balances out between a little caring but also not caring too much.

Edit: Maybe something funny like. "Dont do anyting I wouldn't do Smile"
(This post was last modified: 01-25-2013 09:40 PM by Teddykgb.)
01-25-2013 09:38 PM
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Thatdude Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
"cool"

"word"

"sounds good"
01-25-2013 09:41 PM
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Wayout Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
What shit test? You guys are too much! She is letting him know she wants to be in LTR with him - that's all!
Murrb, what is your plan with this girl? Do you see any long term potential? She is obviously into you and sounds like she is not considering other options. Let her know what YOU want. Be a man.
01-25-2013 09:47 PM
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FourToTheFloor Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 09:47 PM)Wayout Wrote:  What shit test? You guys are too much! She is letting him know she wants to be in LTR with him - that's all!
Murrb, what is your plan with this girl? Do you see any long term potential? She is obviously into you and sounds like she is not considering other options. Let her know what YOU want. Be a man.

You're correct, but her question is basically, "Are you OK with me fucking other guys?"

She wouldn't be mentioning the fact that she's going out on basically a double date if sex wasn't on her mind.
01-25-2013 10:05 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 10:05 PM)FourToTheFloor Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 09:47 PM)Wayout Wrote:  What shit test? You guys are too much! She is letting him know she wants to be in LTR with him - that's all!
Murrb, what is your plan with this girl? Do you see any long term potential? She is obviously into you and sounds like she is not considering other options. Let her know what YOU want. Be a man.

You're correct, but her question is basically, "Are you OK with me fucking other guys?"

She wouldn't be mentioning the fact that she's going out on basically a double date if sex wasn't on her mind.

Yeah that is how I was perceiving it. I the positive is at least she is being honest and pretty much telling me she is fucking another guy while I'm away.

Maybe I should say something like "At least invite me to your and his wedding when I get back"
01-25-2013 10:10 PM
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rudebwoy Away
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Post: #8
RE: How to respond to this message?
She is not fucking another guy, trust me if she was then she would not mention going out at all. She said that to get a reaction from you and to let you know she is not staying home thinking about you (which she probably is).

You are in Thailand, having a great time WE assume.

Be honest how you feel about her! Are you jealous about the idea of her going out and other dudes hitting on her?

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01-25-2013 10:19 PM
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Wayout Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
Girls never mention guys they are fucking! If she mentioned some guy to you - she not fucking him! She might be fucking 12 other dudes but not the guy!
Now ..are you doing some chicks in Thailand? I wouldn't mentioned that to her either.
01-25-2013 10:43 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 10:19 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  She is not fucking another guy, trust me if she was then she would not mention going out at all. She said that to get a reaction from you and to let you know she is not staying home thinking about you (which she probably is).

You are in Thailand, having a great time WE assume.

Be honest how you feel about her! Are you jealous about the idea of her going out and other dudes hitting on her?

So what is the correct reaction I should react with? I dont preferably want her to go out and be hit on by other guys but I understand shit happens and Im not going to lose sleep over it.


Wayout yes I will not mention that!
(This post was last modified: 01-25-2013 10:46 PM by Teddykgb.)
01-25-2013 10:44 PM
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Veloce Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
You must have laid the pipe down pretty well for her to get all wound up like that after 5-6 weeks. You guys hanging out every day or something?

Never ever ever ever talk relationship shit with girls over the phone, through text, or through email. Just tell her,

"Hey thanks for the letter, things are good here. Lookin forward to hanging when I get back. Talk soon."

Some guys would say, "Don't thank her for a letter" or "Looking forward to hanging out is beta." You gotta keep in mind, this girl just took an emotional dump and really reached out to you. If you don't meet her at least part of the way she's going to pull WAY back. I've learned this the hard way since I'm usually a complete stone cold dick to girls when they get all emotional. If a girl goes really emotional on you, you can be aloof, but not cold. She'll turn on you in a heartbeat.

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

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01-25-2013 10:46 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 10:46 PM)thedude3737 Wrote:  You must have laid the pipe down pretty well for her to get all wound up like that after 5-6 weeks. You guys hanging out every day or something?

Never ever ever ever talk relationship shit with girls over the phone, through text, or through email. Just tell her,

"Hey thanks for the letter, things are good here. Lookin forward to hanging when I get back. Talk soon."

Some guys would say, "Don't thank her for a letter" or "Looking forward to hanging out is beta." You gotta keep in mind, this girl just took an emotional dump and really reached out to you. If you don't meet her at least part of the way she's going to pull WAY back. I've learned this the hard way since I'm usually a complete stone cold dick to girls when they get all emotional. If a girl goes really emotional on you, you can be aloof, but not cold. She'll turn on you in a heartbeat.

I agree thats why I want to send a message back that isn't totally dickish but I also dont want to tell her everything she wants to hear. I just want to find a happy medium if that is possible.

Edit: We were haning out about every 3 days or so until right before I was getting ready to leave then we were hanging out just about every other day.
(This post was last modified: 01-25-2013 10:51 PM by Teddykgb.)
01-25-2013 10:48 PM
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rudebwoy Away
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 10:44 PM)murrb Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 10:19 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  She is not fucking another guy, trust me if she was then she would not mention going out at all. She said that to get a reaction from you and to let you know she is not staying home thinking about you (which she probably is).

You are in Thailand, having a great time WE assume.

Be honest how you feel about her! Are you jealous about the idea of her going out and other dudes hitting on her?

So what is the correct reaction I should react with? I dont preferably want her to go out and be hit on by other guys but I understand shit happens and Im not going to lose sleep over it.


Wayout yes I will not mention that!

Reply with " I will be home soon". Doesn't give away too much and it is the truth lol

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01-25-2013 11:02 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
I think I will say




Nope I have no issue it is cool with me. I hope you have fun and I want to talk with you as well when I get back.
01-25-2013 11:04 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 11:02 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 10:44 PM)murrb Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 10:19 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  She is not fucking another guy, trust me if she was then she would not mention going out at all. She said that to get a reaction from you and to let you know she is not staying home thinking about you (which she probably is).

You are in Thailand, having a great time WE assume.

Be honest how you feel about her! Are you jealous about the idea of her going out and other dudes hitting on her?

So what is the correct reaction I should react with? I dont preferably want her to go out and be hit on by other guys but I understand shit happens and Im not going to lose sleep over it.


Wayout yes I will not mention that!

Reply with " I will be home soon". Doesn't give away too much and it is the truth lol

What about the part where she is asking me if I have an issue with her going out with her friend and friends husband and another guy?
01-25-2013 11:06 PM
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rudebwoy Away
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 11:04 PM)murrb Wrote:  I think I will say




Nope I have no issue it is cool with me. I hope you have fun and I want to talk with you as well when I get back.

It is a shit test to get you thinking about her, which has worked.

So you ignore it and give a simple reply, yours is too much.

"I will be home soon" implies you are coming back to her. Then maybe bring back a little trinket to make it seem you were thinking about her.

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01-25-2013 11:18 PM
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Stun Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-25-2013 11:06 PM)murrb Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 11:02 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 10:44 PM)murrb Wrote:  
(01-25-2013 10:19 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  She is not fucking another guy, trust me if she was then she would not mention going out at all. She said that to get a reaction from you and to let you know she is not staying home thinking about you (which she probably is).

You are in Thailand, having a great time WE assume.

Be honest how you feel about her! Are you jealous about the idea of her going out and other dudes hitting on her?

So what is the correct reaction I should react with? I dont preferably want her to go out and be hit on by other guys but I understand shit happens and Im not going to lose sleep over it.


Wayout yes I will not mention that!

Reply with " I will be home soon". Doesn't give away too much and it is the truth lol

What about the part where she is asking me if I have an issue with her going out with her friend and friends husband and another guy?

Brevity is the soul of game. At least in text messages. A short, concise reply always beats a long ass drag out one.

Also, you don't have to answer every part of her question part and parcel. You can communicate what you mean without replying to each exact thing. That is a very "guy" thing to do, but girls don't do communication like that.

I would just say, "I'll be back soon, it'll be awesome to see you."

That communicates that you wanna keep seeing her when you get back, without actually saying it. It also will have her probably not fuck the other guy, but not for sure.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdhFJ5uArUc
01-26-2013 12:52 AM
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RE: How to respond to this message?
It's not a shittest. She just got bit invested in that relationship

(01-25-2013 11:04 PM)murrb Wrote:  I think I will say

Nope I have no issue it is cool with me. I hope you have fun and I want to talk with you as well when I get back.

Good response
01-26-2013 06:28 AM
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bojangles Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
sometimes forum advice works too well, I'm presuming this is the same chick that you asked for help on before Big Grin

comfort game is really underrated and underused.


(01-25-2013 10:46 PM)thedude3737 Wrote:  "Hey thanks for the letter, things are good here. Lookin forward to hanging when I get back. Talk soon."
This is perfect

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01-26-2013 02:38 PM
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RE: How to respond to this message?
[quote='bojangles' pid='356486' dateline='1359229111']
sometimes forum advice works too well, I'm presuming this is the same chick that you asked for help on before Big Grin

comfort game is really underrated and underused.
[end quote]

Based on the timeline Im guessing it is the same girl. We taught him well Bojangles.
01-26-2013 04:50 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
Yes Alpha Hunter and Bojangles this is all your guys fault! haha Now she messaged me backing saying all this stuff where she didn't even have fun and that she is done trying to distract herself. I honestlly can't tell if she is just saying this stuff now because she fucked the other guy and just wants to cover it up or not.

Here is the last message she sent me

"If you plan on staying there longer than 3 weeks I will somehow buy a ticket to wherever you are because I'm getting a murrb sickness lol I'm jealous you are able to just get up and travel with no worries! Where are you going to go after Bangkok?"

Should I actually put her to the test and see if she will actually fly over here?
01-26-2013 06:34 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
I just talked to her on skype because she was posting all this stuff on facebook how she missed me. So we talked and she told me what went down and showed me all the text messages she sent the guy. He was coming on to her hard and she said he was just really awkward and was saying things like "If I was murrb I would have canceled my trip to thailand to be with you" I'm 99.9% convinced nothing happened unless she is a straight up serial liar and conjured up the text message conversation.
01-26-2013 09:44 PM
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-26-2013 06:34 PM)murrb Wrote:  Yes Alpha Hunter and Bojangles this is all your guys fault! haha Now she messaged me backing saying all this stuff where she didn't even have fun and that she is done trying to distract herself. I honestlly can't tell if she is just saying this stuff now because she fucked the other guy and just wants to cover it up or not.

Here is the last message she sent me

"If you plan on staying there longer than 3 weeks I will somehow buy a ticket to wherever you are because I'm getting a murrb sickness lol I'm jealous you are able to just get up and travel with no worries! Where are you going to go after Bangkok?"

Should I actually put her to the test and see if she will actually fly over here?

Yo mofo, I was the one who said keep it light and don't mention the date. She is into you dude and you should be commended on a job well done, you can ease up a "bit" and let her know you will be seeing her in 3 weeks.
However, she did bait you with the FB stuff and you responded by going on skype. She got want she wanted, not too worry you will have pussy waiting for you when you get back. Enjoy the trip cos you won't be going away for awhile solo.

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01-26-2013 09:50 PM
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RE: How to respond to this message?
(01-26-2013 09:44 PM)murrb Wrote:  I just talked to her on skype because she was posting all this stuff on facebook how she missed me. So we talked and she told me what went down and showed me all the text messages she sent the guy. He was coming on to her hard and she said he was just really awkward and was saying things like "If I was murrb I would have canceled my trip to thailand to be with you" I'm 99.9% convinced nothing happened unless she is a straight up serial liar and conjured up the text message conversation.

My man. That guy went full on beta on her in the hope of nailing her and instead DHV'd the fuck out of you.

Here, have a jar. Keep going as you are mate as you will need it soon for her soul.

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01-26-2013 09:57 PM
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Teddykgb Offline
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RE: How to respond to this message?
I appreciate all the advice this forum gives me. Hopefully one day I can give back!
01-26-2013 10:25 PM
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