Post: #1

Me: sup?
Her: hey what's up?
Me: i'm good. lemme ask you something random. ever give your number out to a guy, then not respond to his texts?
Her: yep
Me: why?
Her: i was probably drunk when i gave it out. or cuz i'm too busy to respond. or no longer interested
Me: and there's no guilt involved?
Her: why would i feel guilty?
Me: leading someone on
Her: it's all part of the game
Me: lol. forget about reason and accountability
Her: people get numbers and not call. so why not give your number and not respond? you give numbers to people that may interest you, but not enough to return their message or call. could be many reasons. i wouldn't feel guilty about it. it's my personal choice
Me: it's not just about you though
Her: of course it is. why is it not about me?
Me: how about consideration for the other person
Her: i don't even know the other person. usually non-response is an indication of no further interest. most intelligent people will interpret it as such. it's self explanatory
Me: sure. but why give out your number in the first place
Her: i already told you reasons as to why i may have

Post: #2

To paraphrase Allen Iverson, "We're talking about numbers, man?! We ain't talking about dates, when it actually matters. We're talking about phone numbers?"

I agree with most of what she says. I've taken numbers before and not called. A number is meaningless and I don't even consider it flaking.

Flaking becomes a problem when you actually make plans with a girl and you know there's a 50% chance that she'll cancel that day. That shit is rude and it has to be the number one most frustrating thing about the game.

Post: #3

They flake because of abundance mentality. Get used to it.

Learn to be somewhat flakey, too. A man should have abundance mentality. There's always another girl...

Post: #4

I once asked a girl I know the same question. Gave much the same answer. That it all seemed interesting when she gave out the number but by the next day when she's out of that scenario, the feeling is gone and the motivation no longer there. She also added in "how do I know he's not out there doing this every night?"

(08-31-2012 09:42 AM)Private Man Wrote:  They flake because of abundance mentality. Get used to it.

]

True, but equally important is the emotional caprice endemic to women. As well as self-absorption into a world where their feelings take precedence over all. No such thing as, "well I don't feel like meeting this guy for a drink tonight since I'd rather watch TMZ, but I said I would so I'll follow through anyway. Who knows, I may be pleasantly surprised."

Quote:
Learn to be somewhat flakey, too.

Here is where I disagree. I see flakiness as a more female trait. I see male nature as being more direct, dependable, responsible, imperturbable, saying what we mean and what we want.
My dad to this day is the most reliable, non-flakey person I know so maybe that's where my model comes from. Plus I have a very low tolerance for bullshit.

Post: #5

Its because they live in abundance.

A cpl of months i was sarging hardcore and i had so many options i became flaky too. I started pulling the exact same shit girls pulled on me, cancelling dates 3 hours before we planned to meet because i didnt feel like going out that night, not calling back on numbers i got and all that stuff.

That was really eye opening for me and chicks live in this reality 24/7 without ever doing ANYTHING. Im jealous at them no wonder they dont give a fuck.

Post: #6

(08-31-2012 10:53 AM)w00t Wrote:  Its because they live in abundance.

A cpl of months i was sarging hardcore and i had so many options i became flaky too. I started pulling the exact same shit girls pulled on me, cancelling dates 3 hours before we planned to meet because i didnt feel like going out that night, not calling back on numbers i got and all that stuff.

That was really eye opening for me and chicks live in this reality 24/7 without ever doing ANYTHING. Im jealous at them no wonder they dont give a fuck.

I wrote about this:

http://theprivateman.wordpress.com/2011/...ore-alpha/

Post: #7

I see w00t's point...but won't you run into the problem of

flakey girl not giving a shit + flakey guy not giving a shit = nothing happens

someone has to give chase at some point for something to ever occur - goes along with speakeasy's point of saying what we mean and following through.

Post: #8

I agree with the previous guy. Why would you want to be flakey if that is the behavior you're trying to quell, you know?

Post: #9

A bit off-topic, but I can't imagine your typical girl telling me anything I don't already know, or couldn't quickly figure out myself, when it comes to macking. And she almost almost assuredly couldn't tell me something I couldn't get from guys like the ones here. You know a dude is lame and inexperienced when he gets giddy asking girls (who'd never fuck him) for advice. And it's always 'relationship' advice, because he's too pussy to admit to himself, and especially a girl, that he wants sex above all.

To the extent that a girl will tell me something interesting, it's because she's very perceptive, not because she has a vagina.

Post: #10

The only way to combat flaking is by having more than one girl that your pursuing so that the flake just rolls off your back since theres other girls that have your interests. Someone mentioned the abundance mentality as being a factor for why girls flake...which is spot on. Girls dont associate meeting men with any great difficulty like men do with meeting women. Finding a girl that actually wants to talk to you is not easy for some men, so when they finally get a number they cherish it and value it and they think that girls should do the same. Its completely opposite for them. Getting attention from men is like getting junk mail to girls. They may look at the mail or they may just throw all that shit away.

Post: #11

Where else on the internet have you posted this?
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread...=147703183

Post: #12

it's a combination of abundance of options, different mood, fear, loss of interest etc. but frankly, who cares why. i flake a lot myself. i got places to go and people to see. and on top of that i'm busy with my stuff.

Quote:flakey girl not giving a shit + flakey guy not giving a shit = nothing happens

someone has to give chase at some point for something to ever occur - goes along with speakeasy's point of saying what we mean and following through.

the solution is SCREENING.. having good interactions and focusing on the girls you got chemistry with.

Post: #13

(08-31-2012 03:09 PM)XXL Wrote:  it's a combination of abundance of options, different mood, fear, loss of interest etc. but frankly, who cares why. i flake a lot myself. i got places to go and people to see. and on top of that i'm busy with my stuff.

Quote:flakey girl not giving a shit + flakey guy not giving a shit = nothing happens

someone has to give chase at some point for something to ever occur - goes along with speakeasy's point of saying what we mean and following through.

the solution is SCREENING.. having good interactions and focusing on the girls you got chemistry with.

The only solution is not asking for phone numbers. You'd give up bangs that way, but you also would become more determined to get a same night lay.

Screen all you want, you'll still get flakes if you're taking numbers. It's unavoidable.

I find three kinds of flakes:

The Mute: Doesn't respond at all to your text/call.

The Attention Whore: Responds warmly to your texts, but goes silent when you propose to meet up.

The Deadbeat: stands you up the day of the date. Usually doesn't respond at all to a text confirming that it's on.

They're also in that order of frequency - mutes > attention whores > deadbeats.

Post: #14

I find that if a chick gives me her number and then won't respond, it is incredibly fun for me to send her fucked up pictures and messages, even from other people's phones.

And since I don't know her, fuck her, she was dumb enough to give me her number even though she wasn't interested.

Just flip their selfish me first attitude right back at them and use them for what you want.

Post: #15

number itself is not the goal of course but 'no numbers' policy is also very limiting. first i screen for chemistry, then i move forward as far as i can:
plan a: the simplest one, pull. super rare but you never know
plan b: insta date then and there. even if it's 15 minutes.
plan c: number

Post: #16

They usually flake because I did not spend enough time to build attraction.So after the initial impression wears off(usually after 20 minutes) she thinks ''how did I give my number to this guy?''.Since there is no rationalization for doing so(not having beuilt rapport) she decides not to answer the calls.
For example you talk to a girl then a beggar interrupts and you notice after he leaves how much your attraction level has plummeted.You have to start again.