I'd like to tell you guys, that I too know that feel, I'm ~wrIghter~ and I just got flaked on

I posted a report of it in the player's lounge. Back to the drawing board.

I've had something like 4 flakes in the last 3 days.

Polish girl - never banged her played with her pussy a little and kissed. Couldn't do last night, rescheduled with her for another time but now she's not responding to my messages.

Italian girl - banged her every way possible on first date. She said meeting again would be fun, now saying it's "a bit manic at present" i.e. probably has a boyfriend.

Polish girl 2 - Online girl never met her. Was supposed to meet her tomorrow, she asked me if I'm free tonight. I said I'll let her know (was waiting on another girl), eventually told her sure meet me at x at y. I sent her a see you soon text an hour before the meet. When it came to it I texted her where she is and she said "what? we meet tomorrow". She never apologised of course. Think her English sucks, but still what a cunt. At least I planned to meet her close to my place so only 30 minutes wasted.

English girl - double booked her yesterday but she flaked saying she was ill and said maybe tomorrow will be better. Never heard from her since.

Chinese girl - banged her Wednesday night. Sent her a message the next day, never responded and haven't heard from her since. To be fair I was bored of her anyway and she could tell.

Time to build a new harem.

For me its been two. Was supposed to "hang" with this HB 8 asian chick from IG, but haven't heard from her. Of course the blonde from before. I honestly don't understand what's so difficult about following through with a planned meet. Its like if you're scheduled to work certain days of the week you prioritize those days. If you're scheduled for a date, keep the date. I think the online thing is starting to give me a headache...

(06-27-2015 04:12 PM)~wrIghter~ Wrote:  For me its been two. Was supposed to "hang" with this HB 8 asian chick from IG

Quote:HB 8 asian chick from IG

Quote:HB 8

(06-27-2015 04:12 PM)~wrIghter~ Wrote:  For me its been two. Was supposed to "hang" with this HB 8 asian chick from IG, but haven't heard from her. Of course the blonde from before. I honestly don't understand what's so difficult about following through with a planned meet. Its like if you're scheduled to work certain days of the week you prioritize those days. If you're scheduled for a date, keep the date. I think the online thing is starting to give me a headache...

If the Asian girl is an 8 and she is on IG she probably flaked due to a surprise Dubai trip.

glostic sense

(06-28-2015 07:55 AM)JamesRodri Wrote:  Had a gym date with a 9. Don't know why I continue to date her. Well actually I do, she's a 9. Anyway she excused herself from coming to deadlift and now she claims she'll show up for Sushi in an hour. We'll see. I've been on two dates with her. That's out of 5 planed ones as she's flaked 3 times! The things I do for muff. . .

Are you actually banging her?

(06-23-2015 05:34 PM)civpro Wrote:  Got a number from nightgame on Friday. Responded very well over text Saturday to Monday and agreed to a meetup for tonight. Messages 3 hours before the date today, "Hey [civpro], I gunna have to cancel our date. Family emergency."

Kellogg's Corn Flakes!

Last week I was pretty butthurt after this but now I'm over it. How did I get over it? More prospects! Gotta keep hustlin, keep spinning plates.

Do you guys ever flake on girls?

I've had to do it a few times for legitimate reasons and always felt a little bad about it but the more it happens to me from girls with obviously fake excuses (or none at all!), I care less and less. I feel like I should start to double stack dates and on the off-chance both show up, just flake on one. It just seems like a more sensible way to manage my time than to grab a drink or coffee on my own when some bint no-shows.

Suppose it makes me just as but at least I'm adopting it from a defensive position of having been flaked on so much (or so I'm trying to convince myself)

I think if theirs a chance anyone double books, you either go out with both or flake on one. I'd like to have a backup but chances that the first girl doesn't flake, I'd like to reschedule plan b...or c.

I just rescheduled something earlier with a girl that flaked before...and SHE KNOWS that it may happen again so she didn't make the promise that it'll happen for sure. So my next goal is to find plan B for the scheduled day...not the pill but a girl...that will be the backup..plan.

Got flaked on by my date for tonight. It's a girl I've already banged so not a big loss.
She used the old "family stuff" excuse.

(06-28-2015 10:56 PM)QuietDog Wrote:  Do you guys ever flake on girls?

I've had to do it a few times for legitimate reasons and always felt a little bad about it but the more it happens to me from girls with obviously fake excuses (or none at all!), I care less and less. I feel like I should start to double stack dates and on the off-chance both show up, just flake on one. It just seems like a more sensible way to manage my time than to grab a drink or coffee on my own when some bint no-shows.

Suppose it makes me just as but at least I'm adopting it from a defensive position of having been flaked on so much (or so I'm trying to convince myself)

I've done it a few times. The most recent two occasions a chick was 15 minutes late and didn't give me any notice. So at the scheduled time with no word I hit up a buddy to throw darts and have a beer, she contacted me later and told her some other time.

The other I was already at some other girls place, and had plans to meet up with another but didn't feel like getting off the bed to meet another. Mostly just didn't wanna spend any extra money that day when I was already in chill mode.

I was curious about other people and if they ever flake on their plans as well.

(06-28-2015 08:01 PM)civpro Wrote:  

(06-23-2015 05:34 PM)civpro Wrote:  Got a number from nightgame on Friday. Responded very well over text Saturday to Monday and agreed to a meetup for tonight. Messages 3 hours before the date today, "Hey [civpro], I gunna have to cancel our date. Family emergency."

Kellogg's Corn Flakes!

Last week I was pretty butthurt after this but now I'm over it. How did I get over it? More prospects! Gotta keep hustlin, keep spinning plates.

LOL at my coping optimism here. 2 Frosted Flakes this week. Thanks Tony. Why do I even bother lol.

(06-28-2015 10:56 PM)QuietDog Wrote:  Do you guys ever flake on girls?

I've had to do it a few times for legitimate reasons and always felt a little bad about it but the more it happens to me from girls with obviously fake excuses (or none at all!), I care less and less. I feel like I should start to double stack dates and on the off-chance both show up, just flake on one. It just seems like a more sensible way to manage my time than to grab a drink or coffee on my own when some bint no-shows.

Suppose it makes me just as but at least I'm adopting it from a defensive position of having been flaked on so much (or so I'm trying to convince myself)

The best way to I've found to flake on a date is to do the following;

Make the date with the more desirable girl earlier in the evening...say 7.30 or 8.00.

Set the date with the less desirable girl around 9 to 9.30.

That way, if the first girl shows up, you can shoot a quick text to the second date with a good excuse. And by scheduling the second date an hour or more later, when you do cancel with her, it gives her enough time where she hasn't already started to drive to see you. It's a bit more of a 'thoughtful' way to flake.

I like to apologize and use a reasonable sounding excuse when canceling on the second girl: " Hey, sorry Cat my business meetings are running a lot later than I thought so I'll be tied up to 10 or later. Can I message you in a few days...do want to see you."

Usually, this works pretty good and the girl understands.

One of my mottos in today's dating world: "Better they be inconvenienced than me"

Not sure if it's a flake or not, but my girl lined up for tonight texted me a half hour ago saying she "caught a bug from something she ate." I've already seen her a few times (no bang yet) and in the same text she offered for next week so I don't think she's going silent.

Who knows. The important thing is I really don't care. A year ago I would have, but not now. Sure I'm disappointed since I was looking forward to some fun, but I already have other shit lined up.

I just told her it wasn't a problem and that's that.

Anyone ever call a flake out?

When a girl flakes on me. I always respond with "k" or "k lemme know when you figure your schedule" or some such.

I was just wondering if anyone calls flakes out. I know it's considered beta by some and we should ignore girl's antics, but maybe if enough men did it, over time girls would know we don't buy their BS.

I think as it is now, they actually think we believe their excuse...ergo: "sorry my friend had a flat and I'm on my way to help her" or "family emergency"

In their mind after we accept their excuse: ' well that went smoothly. easy to pull one over on him!' and 'i know I can flake on him in the future without repercussions!"

instead call her on it : You in response to flake text : " flat tire.....mmmmmkaaaay"

or : "family emergency.....yuh huuuuuh no prob a comet hit my house so i wasn't makin it any who"

Some girls are going to think you're an asshole/jackass, etc for calling them out even though you accurately called her lie (and she knows it) but if it's multiple flakes and you know it's not going anywhere....why not have some fun?

I've always struggled with this as it feels like I'm allowing them to essentially push me around by not calling them out on flaking. But if I do say something it's me being butthurt. Seems like a no win situation for us...

I never tried. For me, I'm more humble about it, I guess. If you act like it doesn't bother and really don't give a fuck, better chance of her coming back and trying to make it up. If it happens multiple times...I don't know. Nothing wrong with a little flake humor though.

Yeah, I'm not about to change my thing as it does sometimes work using the zero fucks given reply in terms of getting a date down the line. But for repeated flakes....

^I think the whole 'butthurt' thing gets way overplayed.

So, if you do decide to call someone out just to let them know you're not stupid enough to believe their excuse you're "butthurt"

I think that's BS. you can let someone know that YOU know they are full of shit without being mad, emotional or butthurt about it.

I think that term entails that you're getting emotionally bent out of shape. I'm talking about flatly and blithely calling them out with outcome independence. It's similar to the way a father , with amused mastery over his little daughter, would not believe her story about why she tore her dress and call her on it.

I know women flake for lots of reasons but in my experience I think many times it comes from them being too nervous to actually show up. I've had many women show up and later tell me once they're comfortable 'I almost didn't show up tonight'. When I asked why they would say 'I get really nervous meeting new people'.

I wonder how it would work to respond to their flake excuse with something like ''ah come out, I'm nervous too, we'll have a good time.' Just thinking out loud here.

I know most people advocate for either nothing, a "k" or something similarly aloof, but wouldn't a flake without a reschedule warrant something like "yeah ok", maybe followed by something else on your end if you like her enough? there's ambiguity there e.g. the literal meaning of the words and then "yeah ok" in an i don't buy your bullshit way...or would that always be interpreted in the sarcastic way which implies butthurt-edness?

(07-03-2015 05:57 PM)OregonToSoCal Wrote:  I know women flake for lots of reasons but in my experience I think many times it comes from them being too nervous to actually show up. I've had many women show up and later tell me once they're comfortable 'I almost didn't show up tonight'. When I asked why they would say 'I get really nervous meeting new people'.

I wonder how it would work to respond to their flake excuse with something like ''ah come out, I'm nervous too, we'll have a good time.' Just thinking out loud here.

That may work, but of course, if you say that then you run the risk of being "too direct" with the girl. They're such ambiguous creatures. It may work, try it and let us know.

As you say, there's the girls that are coming for a first date may be too nervous to meet someone new. On the other hand, there's the issue of girls you've banged who flake (I've had that happen) maybe nervous about God knows what post bang.

I perceive it as them thinking that you think they are easy since you banged them on the first date. So, they have to put up a front to prove they're not that easy or just going to be some fuck toy or they just disappear.

I had a girl I banged on a first date once who was going cold on her texts the next day tell me later " I just don't do that " (bang on the first date) when I got her to my room. She said it threw her off banging like that on a first date.
I reassured her that we would only do what she was comfortable with. after that she warmed up and felt comfortable and later that night we were banging. She was 20.

Other girls I've had good sex with on first dates would be more terse in their texts post bang than pre bang. It's almost as if I shocked the real world into them by banging them good. Like they were thinking 'oh damn, I got the pipe laid to me - this shit is for real' and they were 'shy' in their texts post bang. Only my perception here of what they may be thinking mind you.

This seems to happen exclusively with the 20 - 22 year olds in my experience. When you're doing 25 year olds and up, it seems they usually are more brash and much less coy post bang. They've usually been just as warm in post bang texts are pre bang to me. It's amazing really how at only the tender age of 25 or so, most of them can basically be considered used up , experienced hos. Sad really.

As for the young girls who are typically the shy/flakey ones post bang, some, I could manage to see again after dealing with their games. But more than i'd care to admit fade away. It's a strange phenomenon, that is, girls you bang good on a date (it's usually the first) and basically don't want to see you again.

I think it's a balance between reassuring them you don't think of them as easy sluts and that you respect them.

I'm sure there's more experienced players here that can offer more insights on this and the psychology behind it.

I thought a girl was nervous too on a date. A few months later and I started banging her I found out she banged 3 other guys within a few months before me.

Wishful thinking. They aren't showing up because they have better options.

(07-03-2015 06:38 PM)Travesty444 Wrote:  I thought a girl was nervous too on a date. A few months later and I started banging her I found out she banged 3 other guys within a few months before me.

Wishful thinking. They aren't showing up because they have better options.

^I agree this is the case most of the time.

But there's something about banging on a first date, if you've managed to pull that off, which may cause some women to be more defensive/coy about seeing you again; ergo " after the one drink in the bar, he brought me to his hotel room, kept giving me drinks he was making and banged me....on the FIRST DATE. He must think I'm a ho." etc etc.

I'm in the "Either say nothing or wait 8-12 hours and reply with 'k'" camp.

I don't give a shit what she thinks; I set the agenda and I have a "1 and done" flaking policy. No chick is worth begging for. Not a one. Bitch flakes = she's finished. "Nexted" and gone. No "restarts", no "counteroffers". You destroy your SMV by doing those things. IOW, you're fucking yourself over by groveling. You scream "I'M DESPERATE!"

Now, do things come up in life? Be realistic, of course they do. But unless something so shattering comes up, if she wants to get together with you, she will.

*Hungry cats...
*Sad roommates...
*Not being able to find a contact lens...
*It's raining/snowing/too cold/too hot..
*Etc., etc., etc...

Are bullshit reasons thrown at you because:

*She either got a "better" (in her opinion) offer.
and/or
*She was never gonna get together with you, period.

Chicks will wait in line overnight to buy the newest iPhone, but she can't find a couple hours to get together with you? Forget the bitch ASAP.

Playing the "coulda/woulda/shoulda" game is counterproductive and reeks of Beta desperation. "Next" the bitch, get out there and seal the deal with other pieces of ass.