Post: #1

I was pissed off yesterday and just decided to up and head out solo. Have my mother calling me a weirdo, my brother says the same thing on the phone.

Arrive at the club, bouncers ask if I'm alone. I just say I'm meeting some friends plus I know one of the bouncers so no trouble. Throughout the night about 2-3 more folk ask who I'm here with and I just deflect it to a different topic. Maybe people just noticed because the place wasn't busy. No big deal.

Everyone who knows I went solo thinks it's weird. I think my country has some cultural issue, and think people who do shit alone are weird. I don't care, I like it.

This is my second time doing this and so far no bangs. I can makeout will girls no problem, but trying to get them home is the issue. I think the fact that I'm without a good wing makes this part harder, or maybe I just need more experience.


Anyway, my main point here is that there are haters out there who don't want you to do well, and will hate on you because they're too scared to just go to a club alone. Fuck it I'm still gonna do it!

And do you guys think I should just tell people I'm solo or just deflect it?

Post: #2

(10-18-2014 10:26 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  I think my country has some cultural issue, and think people who do shit alone are weird.

What's the country, out of interest? I'm going to take a punt and say the UK.

Edit: I just checked your profile and it is indeed the UK. You're right, there are some cultural issues. This being one of them. My theory is that it's because none of them have the courage to do it themselves as they're all too busy being self conscious, so they deflect their own problems onto you.

Post: #3

Simply do it Christian McQueen-style:

Quote:
Best Line To Use When Solo

Her: “Who are you here with?” or “Where are your friends?”

You: “It’s my Mom’s birthday so I took her to dinner, but she went to bed early.”

http://blockedurl.com/2014/05/17/bonus-w...ling-solo/

Post: #4

(10-18-2014 10:38 AM)Bey Wrote:  

(10-18-2014 10:26 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  I think my country has some cultural issue, and think people who do shit alone are weird.

What's the country, out of interest? I'm going to take a punt and say the UK.

Republic of Ireland. To be honest I'd say it's the same kind of thing in UK, probably other Anglo countries aswell, but I don't know.

Post: #5

(10-18-2014 10:42 AM)Flint Wrote:  Simply do it Christian McQueen-style:

Quote:
Best Line To Use When Solo

Her: “Who are you here with?” or “Where are your friends?”

You: “It’s my Mom’s birthday so I took her to dinner, but she went to bed early.”

http://blockedurl.com/2014/05/17/bonus-w...ling-solo/

I'd forgotten about that one. I'm gonna use it next time and see how it goes.

Only thing I'm wondering is if most will see it as odd or not. I'm 19, and go to young clubs, so some could interpret that as meaning I'm a mammas boy, but then the fact that I'm out alone probably disproves that. I'll test it out anyway.

Post: #6

http://www.thegmanifesto.com/2007/08/goi...-dolo.html

Post: #7

Anyone who says rolling solo is wierd is codependent and needs friends or others for confidence, don't let them make you feel like you're the wierdo. You have balls to go out on your own, not feel awkward being by yourself, the ability to meet people, engage strangers in conversation, thats good don't let others put you down.

Years ago before I even knew rolling solo was a strategy or gaming thing I had a buddy who rolled solo. I think his doing so was more out of not having a lot of buddies but whatever. He will go out by himself, meet girls, talk to people, wind up hanging out with groups of people. He does a ton of networking which has led to some good business connections. I used to think it was a bit strange but none the less would give him props for havin the balls to do so.

After seeing him do it so much I started doing it myself when my group of friends got married, moved away, etc. It's actually a lot of fun once you get past giving a shit what people think of you. I don't try to make excuses or say I'm meeting people I say I decided to go out tonight yeah Im by myself, I like rolling that way I can go where I want when I want, dont gotta wait on friends to leave a bar, can hang with who I want, etc. If you say it with confidence people look at you like ok here's a self assured dude as opposed to here's a dude with no friends.

Post: #8

To be honest, showing up with people is a sign of having social capital, and showing up alone can show a lack of that.

If anything I would lie, say you were drinking with friends prior and wanted to go out, they said no and you went anyway. Drinking by yourself has negative social connotations and coupled with going out alone can definitely not be help.

Post: #9

No, don't tell. There's no point. Unless you just want to fuck around with girl at party for your own amusement. Otherwise don't tell you're solo. If someone is too curious...

- my friends are coming we're set to meet here i hope they will come [best line cause it's impossible to check, everybody knows how it is to organize a group of people to meet at one place, every time some shit happens, some coming too early, some too late, some don't come at all cause they get fucked up or change plans in the meantime etc]

- not here, they're are at xzy venue i just came here for a moment to see what i'm missing, it's fine, we're adults you know, it's not like we have to hold our hands everywhere we go

- [if you're by car] they were out of control tonight and got totally fucked up i had to drive them home, but hey the night is young, i had to come back.

- i'm looking for them too but they don't respond, we're supposed to meet somewhere in this area so i came here

Basically the simpler the bullshit the better. Don't expect too much from people. That mom's dinner thing is waaaaaaay too fancy for girls to grasp at night, they're likely to start asking questions about out of curiosity etc which is the last thing you want. Something very simple that anyone can relate to is better than "cool" answer that leads to questions.

Post: #10

It's easy to retreat and put out a nervous or guilty vibe. Don't sweat it. Act like you own the place and you know everyone there. Just have a good time.

Post: #11

(10-18-2014 12:40 PM)Parlay44 Wrote:  It's easy to retreat and put out a nervous or guilty vibe. Don't sweat it. Act like you own the place and you know everyone there. Just have a good time.

I know man. I'm way more active when solo. I approach everybody, even just go up to guys to try and get insta wingman. Some are receptive, but many are too scared to try approach some girls.

I talk to staff too, usually bouncers. I do sometimes have a tendency to distract them from their job which annoys them, need to fix that. However because of this I "befriended" a bouncer who is a a top powerlifter and even went to see him train. Talking to this guy makes me look cool, he's the biggest guy in the club.

I include myself in people's groups for a while then move on. Makes it look like I know everyone.

However for my next solo night I'm gonna hit up a different club, this one is just getting crap. I wanna move beyond my comfort zone.

Post: #12

"What makes you think I have friends?"

I've gone out alone or in groups/with a wing (probably on average around a 50/50 split, though these days I'm only occasionally in the mood for nightgame in general) when I was a teenager, in my 20s and now in my 30s.

There are definitely some clubs or bars where I've felt out of place and often quickly moved on - places where the layout means almost everyone is standing or sitting around tables in groups (that has proven unfortunately somewhat more common here in the southeastern parts of Europe than in my native Scandinavia, Greece is probably the worst example I've come across yet) and it's hard to approach if you're not the type who's adept at or enjoys entertaining an entire table (I'm not) - but also plenty of places where going out alone has been great, whether it's because it's easy to quickly start approaching girls who are in pairs or more rarely alone, or because it's a place where you don't even stand out at all if you're standing a alone at the bar with a beer or a drink.

Post: #13

No shame in rolling solo. I quite enjoy it actually. Last time I banged a girl from rolling solo at a bar, she asked me what I'm doing there by myself and I think I told her "I felt like getting a drink" in a relaxed way, like it's something quite normal, which I believe it is. And this was the end of that part of the conversation.

Inner game is important. I don't go there feeling like I'm doing something weird. I'm just relaxing with a group of people, having a drink, being a bit chatty. But I think in the US all of this is just socially accepted. In Eastern Europe for example, it would be weird to go to a bar alone, if you're a local, since people there have much stronger friend ties.

Post: #14

Fuck those who try to shame you.

I have stopped giving a fuck about people's opinion on me being solo since they are always sticking together and don't even mix groups. Especially men. Most of the guys I befriend, and are not drunk, have the player mindset(even if they don't pull, they try to approach and be social). They will carry a conversation and not give you shit for being solo.
Those who call you weird are insecure. They would rather die than do the same as you on a consistent basis.
Being solo helps in making you more focused too, if you are seriously there to get laid. Too often if I am with friend I will get lost in the "good times with the bros only" mindset and get lazy on the approaches, especially when they are not trying to approach. You can venue change easily too if the place is a sausagefest.

Post: #15

There are things you can do/can't do as men or women.

Men can not go to wine lounge together to grab a glass of wine.
Men can not go to the club to dance. 'hey bro let's just dance tonight'

A woman going to a bar by herself will be looked as a slut. (unless it's a metro area right after work)
A man going to a bar by himself to drink a glass of scotch is totally fine.

I just say I came by myself. I tried saying 'they are somewhere', 'I am waiting' but I think they can figure it out.

Rolling solo is hard but finding a right person to roll with is even harder.
(met a guy who came by himself. he said he left his family dinner lol. I let the guy talk to girls and I approach on my own. that's my style.
After approaching girls and didn't introduce him to them 'hey this is my friend', maybe he felt disrespected and left. I do not like to hang with those kind of guys who expects you to open the door)

Post: #16

A couple weeks ago I went solo to one of my favorite places in walking distance.

Eventually I was in the zone, just kinda went up to a table of girls and took the hand of a girl I liked.

On our first date she complimented how "independent" it was that I was there alone.

Things are going well with her, I'll just say.

Girls will frame you being solo as very positive if you are confident about it.

Aside from social-circle bangs, I generally do better solo than with friends or a wing. Finding the right wing is damned hard.

Post: #17

You don't necessarily need a good response to people asking you why you're rolling solo.

You first need to accept that it's okay and you gotta be comfortable in your own skin. Once you do that magically you will stop getting this question. And you will also answer it without feeling a need to prove something.

In my experience, once I did that I stopped getting asked 'are you here by yourself' by girls. Or they ask me from time to time but I don't even recall because it was such a meaningless question.

'yes'
'its complicated'

If they ask why you're not out with friends (trust me this will rarely happen once you appear comfortable solo) just say you have no friends (roosh's line).

There comes times where you have to roll solo anyways. Good friends to be out with will come and go, you will come and go, other factors will play in..

It's also ironic because I do have more fun out when I'm out with good friends as opposed to solo. No one can deny that. But the times I have gotten a ONS in those situations were all... solo. I was split from my friends in every situation in the club during peak times.

Post: #18

It's not just an Irish issue.

"Where are your friends"

There are a lot of ways you can handle it

The "real" reason - "I'm supposed to sit at home cause my bum ass friends ain't got no money and would rather play X-Box....."

A joking insult - "I'm guessing that's what you do, too scared to see the big bad world.."

Not socially needy - "I make friends wherever I go"

Funny - "Oh you checking for my goons, we got beef? Put up your dukes"

Turning it into a flirting opportunity - "Hell yeah I'm solo, you trying to get your boy, why not just say so, and stop beating around the bush"

The main thing is to not let it get to you.

That's when it becomes an issue. Someone asks a question and you react negatively and anti-socially. I tend to view any of that stuff as a misguided attempt to connect socially.

When people come at you like that,
- they might be fucking with you
- they might genuinely interested
- they might just be making conversation

Whatever their intention is, it's up to you to "take the frame".

People will often forget their original mindset when they get into a conversation, and then just start reacting to what you do and say.

(cops don't do this, neither does security or bouncers. Most people don't have that sort of mindset, unless they have some sort of power)

The same thing happens when you make an approach on a chick.
Same thing happens when people ask why you're not drinking

She looks one way, you think one thing.

You say something, and suddenly everything you initially thought was rubbish. Whole vibe changes cause you opened your mouth.

Those comments are launch pads. Use them as such to propel you to Olympian Heights © Some Wu Tang skit

WIA

Post: #19

I see no point in engaging the topic. If it's a big place then I just say friends are inside/outside/somewhere. If it's a smaller place, I say I just moved to the city and felt like a drink. Or that my friends just went home because they had to work early. It's more important to have the right mindset yourself than come up with excuses. I don't approach larger mixed sets when I am out alone anyway.

Post: #20

(10-18-2014 06:06 PM)Moto Wrote:  A couple weeks ago I went solo to one of my favorite places in walking distance.

Eventually I was in the zone, just kinda went up to a table of girls and took the hand of a girl I liked.

On our first date she complimented how "independent" it was that I was there alone.

Things are going well with her, I'll just say.

Girls will frame you being solo as very positive if you are confident about it.

Aside from social-circle bangs, I generally do better solo than with friends or a wing. Finding the right wing is damned hard.

I was rolling solo in DF armano

Post: #21

(10-18-2014 10:42 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  

(10-18-2014 10:38 AM)Bey Wrote:  

(10-18-2014 10:26 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  I think my country has some cultural issue, and think people who do shit alone are weird.

What's the country, out of interest? I'm going to take a punt and say the UK.

Republic of Ireland. To be honest I'd say it's the same kind of thing in UK, probably other Anglo countries aswell, but I don't know.

I don't think going out alone is "normal" for most people in any country.

Post: #22

Own your frame. Don't be afraid about what some basic bitch thinks. Be proud because how many other guys are rolling 10 sausages deep. My go-to line is "Best way to meet new people." If she's not charmed by that, fuck her. Some girl will be with it.

Post: #23

I'm about to roll out solo right now and hit downtown. I need fresh meat.

Post: #24

(10-18-2014 10:26 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  I was pissed off yesterday and just decided to up and head out solo. Have my mother calling me a weirdo, my brother says the same thing on the phone.

First of all, it shouldn't even bother you that people say that.

Best reply is any variance on "ok" (like, ":Yeah that's true" Yup going out alone, nope its cool don't worry about it." )then don't say another word.

Second and most importantly:

Don't go out when you're "in a bad mood." Women can sense that and get repelled. Do something else that helps you relieve stress, or just chill that night. Or do something that gets you feeling like you're on top of the world. . .whatever that is.

Oh and on going out alone, there's nothign wrong with that at all. pretty much 99.9% of my lays from going out, were when I was alone. So . . .yeah. not a big deal.

Post: #25

(10-18-2014 11:38 PM)CJ_W Wrote:  

(10-18-2014 10:26 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  I was pissed off yesterday and just decided to up and head out solo. Have my mother calling me a weirdo, my brother says the same thing on the phone.

First of all, it shouldn't even bother you that people say that.

Best reply is any variance on "ok" (like, ":Yeah that's true" Yup going out alone, nope its cool don't worry about it." )then don't say another word.

Second and most importantly:

Don't go out when you're "in a bad mood." Women can sense that and get repelled. Do something else that helps you relieve stress, or just chill that night. Or do something that gets you feeling like you're on top of the world. . .whatever that is.

Oh and on going out alone, there's nothign wrong with that at all. pretty much 99.9% of my lays from going out, were when I was alone. So . . .yeah. not a big deal.

Didn't make that line clear. I went out because I was pissed off during the day. It was only afterwards that I was getting the hate.

I feel that the reason some people asked where my people where at and shit like that was because I was in a bad mood from earlier in the day, and some people could sense this and thought I was stressed because I was solo.

No point in going out pissed off. Now I know.