Post: #1

I'm on OKCupid (yes, I know). One of the questions that the site apparently pushes pretty hard on the women (perhaps the men too) is "if you had an unplanned pregnancy, would abortion be an option?" A surprising number of the women who get through my fairly tight filters for rationality and secular values answer "no" to this, which immediately shows up in my list of "unacceptable answers". What gives? I filter these women for being childfree, slender, and non-religious. Why do so many seem to want a broken condom to change their lives for the worse?

P.S. Please don't respond if all you have to say is that I'm going to hell. I'm an unabashed atheist and rationalist. I will duly note and ignore your concern for my soul. Thank you.

Post: #2

I imagine they say they want a nice guy who brings them flowers and remembers anniversaries too, right?

Post: #3

That is actually relatively rational. Many of the women who get abortions end up regretting it and end up intentionally getting pregnant right away to make up for it. This doesn't surprise me. Just clear out your answer to this question if it is really bothering you.

Post: #4

Abortion is homicide, period.

Those of us on the 'critics of feminism' side of the ledger are supposed to be BETTER than our adversaries. Amanda Marcotte and Jill Filipovic are the sort of people who believe their personal liberty, career goals and 'bodily autonomy' justify killing a baby. I have no interest in joining them, and neither should you.

Post: #5

Abortion is a pretty awful thing no matter how you look at it. Medically it's pretty grotesque. Not judging, God forbid I might even consider it given certain circumstances, just staying reality.
This actually aligns with what most ppl say..."*I* wouldn't get one, but I feel women should have the right to flush their babies down the toilet."

Post: #6

(05-16-2014 03:24 PM)heavy Wrote:  This actually aligns with what most ppl say..."*I* wouldn't get one, but I feel women should have the right to flush their babies down the toilet."

Right. If you point blank ask most women if they'd get an abortion they'd say no. But put them in context where they're unexpectedly pregnant and facing all the problems that brings into their lives... suddenly abortion is very tempting.

That was the point of my post above. Pay attention to what women do, not what they say.

Post: #7

Weambulance,

Depends on the woman.

A lot of women who have unplanned pregnancies end up keeping the baby. Look at all the 18-22 year old mothers out there.

Post: #8

(05-16-2014 03:36 PM)Hector_St_Clare Wrote:  Weambulance,

Depends on the woman.

A lot of women who have unplanned pregnancies end up keeping the baby. Look at all the 18-22 year old mothers out there.

I said tempting. I didn't say they'd all do it.

Post: #9

(05-16-2014 02:15 PM)ThoriumFuelCycle Wrote:  P.S. Please don't respond if all you have to say is that I'm going to hell. I'm an unabashed atheist and rationalist. I will duly note and ignore your concern for my soul. Thank you.

If you are so rational, you should understand that males are generally the much more rational sex, and ignore this answer entirely. Their answer isn't based on what they would actually do, but for how they will be viewed for their answer.

Post: #10

Wow, what a shitstorm. The OKC question is, admittedly, fairly stupid. Are we talking about the morning after pill (technically abortion) or waiting to miss a period and then going to the clinic. I guess my concerns are fundamentally self-protective. Being a broken condom away from an 18 year prison sentence isn't a good idea. And yes, I know women say all sorts of shit so men won't think they are "sluts". These same women often seem to post extremely slutty pictures of themselves on dating sites too. Well, you guys know this shit.

Abortion is murder, Hitler, etc... yes I know. I probably should have said this is not intended to be a place to debate abortion too. I admit it - I'm a baby killing, Satanist, Athiestic, Jewish, Muslim, Communist Homosexual. There, is everyone happy now.

Post: #11

(05-16-2014 04:06 PM)ThoriumFuelCycle Wrote:  Wow, what a shitstorm. The OKC question is, admittedly, fairly stupid. Are we talking about the morning after pill (technically abortion) or waiting to miss a period and then going to the clinic. I guess my concerns are fundamentally self-protective. Being a broken condom away from an 18 year prison sentence isn't a good idea. And yes, I know women say all sorts of shit so men won't think they are "sluts". These same women often seem to post extremely slutty pictures of themselves on dating sites too. Well, you guys know this shit.

Abortion is murder, Hitler, etc... yes I know. I probably should have said this is not intended to be a place to debate abortion too. I admit it - I'm a baby killing, Satanist, Athiestic, Jewish, Muslim, Communist Homosexual. There, is everyone happy now.

This isn't a shitstorm. This a shit drizzle. Maybe a sprinkle.

By the way, as a fellow atheist, you should try not to be so obnoxious. This is why few take atheists seriously anymore.

Post: #12

With OKC, don't even answer any shit-test questions.

Many questions - both online and off - are just there to disqualify you. Abortion is one of them. No answer will make a woman's panties wet, but several will make her think she could never date you.

Once you can spot a qualifer question, you'll see them all over the place. It's part of the reason women are often bad conversationalists - they come from judgement rather than play. Most of the time women ask something on a date, it's a qualifier. Ignore, make a joke, playfully misinterpret, reframe.

Woman: "Would you ever consider an abortion an option?"
Me: "Sure, but not past the age of five. After that, it's too hard to hide the bodies."

Woman: "What do you think about abortion?"
Me: "My mom always said she wanted one of those."

Woman: "I can't date anyone who doesn't support abortion."
Me: "I'll stick to anal."

You get the idea.

Post: #13

(05-16-2014 04:53 PM)runsonmagic Wrote:  With OKC, don't even answer any shit-test questions.

Yeah, the problem is that once you do, you can't un-answer. You can change your answer, sure...

How much do you love Hitler?
a) A lot, I re-reread Mein Kampf in German every week
b) Tons!
c) A fair amount.

The only way to win...

Post: #14

Why would it be a deal breaker for a woman to want to keep her offspring? It is the very purpose of her existence.

My opinion, having banged around the block a few times, is that women who are okay with getting an abortion are the same types who don't like children, which means they are less feminine. No thanks, I'll take feminine women every time. Christian McQueen shares the same view as well.

Also, I wouldn't consider the morning after pill abortion. You force the discharge of the egg with that pill, but merely fertilizing an egg is not what creates life. Putting a fertilized egg in a test tube won't grow into a human. It needs to be attached to a uterus wall before it will grow. So using the morning after pill to flush out the uterus before it has attached is pretty close, but not necessarily the same thing as an abortion.

So, in summary, I think you are mistaken about wanting women who want abortions. Try dating some women who don't like abortions and I'm sure your cock will agree with me.

Post: #15

^^Truth.

Women who'd consider an abortion are out of touch with their femininity.

Post: #16

As far as okc goes, don't answer any question that doesn't make you look good. I have a fake, invisible profile that I use to answer the same questions as women I'm interested to get to know them better, but I will leave my own relatively blank, and only answer questions that make me look good and won't turn off any potential mates. A lot of women might say no to abortion on their profiles, but dig deeper into the profile, if she shows any signs of feminism of being a "career woman" then regardless of her abortion answers she's a slut and lying

Post: #17

(05-16-2014 02:15 PM)ThoriumFuelCycle Wrote:  I'm on OKCupid (yes, I know). One of the questions that the site apparently pushes pretty hard on the women (perhaps the men too) is "if you had an unplanned pregnancy, would abortion be an option?" A surprising number of the women who get through my fairly tight filters for rationality and secular values answer "no" to this, which immediately shows up in my list of "unacceptable answers". What gives? I filter these women for being childfree, slender, and non-religious. Why do so many seem to want a broken condom to change their lives for the worse?

P.S. Please don't respond if all you have to say is that I'm going to hell. I'm an unabashed atheist and rationalist. I will duly note and ignore your concern for my soul. Thank you.

This P.S. in your post is really trollish.

On the surface, the point of your post seems to be asking why "so many seem to want a broken condom to change their lives for the worse?" Which is a loaded question to begin with...

But that P.S. makes it clear you have no intention to receive the answer to that question.

If you're asking why they are against abortion, your atheism and so-called rationalism really has nothing to do with the answer you're going to get. Because this isn't about what you believe - it's about what they believe.

And to a lot of people who don't believe in abortion, it is morally wrong. Period. You don't have to agree with them because society gives you that option, but don't pretend to seek understanding and then thrown in a condemnation against anyone who has a moral or spiritual take on the subject.

Furthermore, while some of us on this forum do have what we'd consider a moral stance on abortion topics (I'd say a small minority of us), there's hardly anyone going around here shouting about fire and brimstone and getting preachy.

So try not to be so melodramatic.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #18

To add to what Beyond Borders just wrote, this is also trollish:
"Abortion is murder, Hitler, etc... yes I know. I probably should have said this is not intended to be a place to debate abortion too. I admit it - I'm a baby killing, Satanist, Athiestic, Jewish, Muslim, Communist Homosexual. There, is everyone happy now."

That said, for the people reading who are not trolls, I wouldn't put too much stock in how women answer those questions. They might be answering to project an image of morality when that's the last thing they're about.

Women are also full of cognitive dissonance. I've seen a lot of profiles where they admit to having same-sex affairs but rule out any partner who has had "homosexual love." Come again? I can get how that makes sense from a sociological/commercial TV viewpoint but it makes no sense from a moral perspective.

And so on. You're not dealing with philosophers or religious studies scholars for the most part on dating sites anyway.

Post: #19

(05-16-2014 05:37 PM)ThoriumFuelCycle Wrote:  

(05-16-2014 04:53 PM)runsonmagic Wrote:  With OKC, don't even answer any shit-test questions.

Yeah, the problem is that once you do, you can't un-answer. You can change your answer, sure..

You can unanswer. Click "re- answer" then click "clear question"

Post: #20

(05-16-2014 04:06 PM)ThoriumFuelCycle Wrote:  Abortion is murder, Hitler, etc... yes I know. I probably should have said this is not intended to be a place to debate abortion too. I admit it - I'm a baby killing, Satanist, Athiestic, Jewish, Muslim, Communist Homosexual. There, is everyone happy now.

Not happy until the last missing description on that list is filled out as:

Post: #21

(05-16-2014 07:09 PM)Samseau Wrote:  Why would it be a deal breaker for a woman to want to keep her offspring? It is the very purpose of her existence.

My opinion, having banged around the block a few times, is that women who are okay with getting an abortion are the same types who don't like children, which means they are less feminine. No thanks, I'll take feminine women every time. Christian McQueen shares the same view as well.

Also, I wouldn't consider the morning after pill abortion. You force the discharge of the egg with that pill, but merely fertilizing an egg is not what creates life. Putting a fertilized egg in a test tube won't grow into a human. It needs to be attached to a uterus wall before it will grow. So using the morning after pill to flush out the uterus before it has attached is pretty close, but not necessarily the same thing as an abortion.

So, in summary, I think you are mistaken about wanting women who want abortions. Try dating some women who don't like abortions and I'm sure your cock will agree with me.

I entirely agree with this.

Just one correction, on the scientific front (I'm a biologist): The morning after pill actually does not destroy a fertilized egg. This wasn't so clear when it was developed, but it's clear now (at least, no one has found evidence that the MAP causes implantation failures at any significant rate). The MAP works, for the most part, by inhibiting fertilization. Sperm can survive inside the female reproductive system for a few days after sex, which is why the MAP has a narrow window of effectiveness. In fact, some reproductive health experts argue that it's a *flaw* of the morning after pill that it will not work if the egg has already been fertilized.

If anyone disagrees with this, I'm happy to furnish citations.

And yes, I find women who say 'I could never have an abortion', or who say mocking things about modern feminism, to be an incredible turn-on. More feminine ---> HOT.