Post: #1

I would like to hotbox my living room and then loop this song





at max volume on a Dr.Dre Beatbox until a cop came to the door which I would open without turning down thr volume.

Seems like a good time! Anyways, what would you like to do if you didn't care about being arrested or fined?


ALSO: Is it beta to smile in your government issued photo IDs? I'll need to get an Ohio ID in a couple months. And s a user here who will reMANE anonymous said, you want to appear alpha to uniformed officials with the power of arrest.

Post: #2

Great thread idea.

I've always wanted to be a master thief. Not for the money but for the challenge. Although the money would also be nice.

To past time on some of the more boring jobs I have had over the years I would 'case the place'.

Learn the timing of alarms, position of cameras, shift changes etc.
How to get in, get out and get away with getting caught.

Would be sweet to get away with making some huge heists: art, expensive cars, diamonds etc.

Then enjoy the playboy lifestyle between jobs between jobs.

Similar to the Thomas Crown Affair.

Post: #3

Strip butt naked, paint in black "I Am The Patriarchy!!!" across my chest and streak through all women's studies classes in America and the Jezebel staff room.

Post: #4

Wet work.

Post: #5

Rob a bank

Post: #6

I'd love to drive hummer with a brush guard and crash full speed into someone's shitty parked car and then wait for the owner to come out. I'd greet him or her while shmokin a shig, wife beaterz wayfayers, and say its your lucky day. Then call my driver and go to a dealership and let the person pickout another car and buy it for him in cash.

Post: #7

To take a crap in the covers (army hats) of most of my former Sergeants Major, then place it on their heads.

Post: #8

Fuck a fattie

Post: #9

Buy a bunch of flower seed and just plant it in front of our parliament in the shape of a huge cock. When March and April come, I'll laugh. From jail.

Post: #10

(02-24-2014 03:00 AM)Rosca Wrote:  Fuck a fattie

Post: #11

(02-24-2014 03:25 AM)funkyzeit Wrote:  Buy a bunch of flower seed and just plant it in front of our parliament in the shape of a huge cock. When March and April come, I'll laugh. From jail.

Some landscaper trimmed the hedges next to my office in the shape of a giant cock with balls last year. Here is a picture

   

Post: #12

Drive a tank with a barricade plow showel attached through traffic. Just pushing everything aside

Post: #13

(02-24-2014 03:00 AM)Rosca Wrote:  Fuck a fattie

This thread is about things you WOULD do, not things you've already done.

Post: #14

Thread is intended to get men on record for doing illegal things. Don't post.

Post: #15

This thread about finding out if smiling in gov IDs is beta. No one has commented on that yet.

Post: #16

I've always wanted to go to a movie theatre and kick the person in front of me in the back of the head.

Post: #17

(02-24-2014 02:16 AM)2Wycked Wrote:  Strip butt naked, paint in black "I Am The Patriarchy!!!" across my chest and streak through all women's studies classes in America and the Jezebel staff room.

This needs to be done on a massive scale.

Post: #18

I plead the 5th.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #19

Punch Ali in the face, but I know he'd call the cops.

Post: #20

I would like to square my ledger using force.

Post: #21

Slightly off topic but I've always wanted to set off a nuke and watch it from a safe distance.

Post: #22

(02-24-2014 07:47 AM)Jeimuzu Wrote:  Slightly off topic but I've always wanted to set off a nuke and watch it from a safe distance.

What the fuck kind of escalation was that?

I'd love to drink in the street between clubs, I think it's a bullshit law that only affects people with something to lose since the dregs of society drink in the street anyway. Smoking weed in inbetween clubs would also be great, though I guess it would fuck with my year long wagon. I'd like to be able to have a gentlemans agreement fight that wouldn't lead to arrest, 1 v 1 until someone goes down kind of deal, similar to the mutual combat laws they have in washington.

Post: #23

Shoot other drivers on the road a la GTA 5.

Post: #24

I had an idea in the past about creating a crime based theme park. You show up and banks , haji marts and the entire town is functional including the jail and police dept.

Post: #25

Lock picking would be a cool skill