Post: #1

I've recently decided to completely give up alcohol for health reasons. I feel much more focused, relaxed, and alert when I am off alcohol. I just don't like it anymore and it has never done anything good for me. I also feel it's a massive waste of money.

I know some people here are going to say "moderation" but I want to quit full stop.

I still want to go out and enjoy the nightlife and social activities so i'm here asking for some tips from individuals who have gone through a similar lifestyle change. Do you guys do the Bruce Wayne thing and pretend to drink or just turn down offered drinks in social settings? Did it really impact the type of venues you go to? In Asia and parts of Europe not drinking and still socializing can be real challenging.

Post: #2

A good way to stop drinking is to stop hanging out with friends that drink. I remember years ago (i started drinking when i was 16) when I was trying to give up drinking, I couldn't do it because I was always with friends that drunk a lot. It was just impossible for all of us to be together without me drinking. When I stopped hanging out with them, I didn't have a reason to drink. I was not the type to drink by myself anyway so it was easy to quit after stopping hanging out with my buddies.

If you can't go to bars without drinking, avoid going to bars for a while.

Post: #3

Try phenibut. Its legal and has kinda similar effects w/o the negatives (stupor, calories, hangovers).

Some people get hangovers from it too but I dont. I take 3gs to get an effect similar to alcohol.

Im trying to cut back as well, I dont have a big problem w alcohol, I dont drink during the week and my worklife is legit, I just tend to go overboard every time I drink.

Watch out for drinking on phenibut though, for me at least I can go maybe up to 4-5 drinks and feel great. However, drinking an amount that would usually make me drunk is trouble. You dont feel that drunk, probably due to the nootropic effect and then BOOM, good luck walking.

Post: #4

Go out with people who don't drink. That's probably the best way to do it. Having a few solid wings who stay sober is priceless.

Post: #5

(11-08-2013 09:12 PM)torontokid Wrote:  Go out with people who don't drink.

Problem is, those are the most boring people on earth.

Post: #6

Read "Easy Way to Control Alcohol" by Allen Carr. Don't make a mental note of it if you're serious about quitting - just read it!

I read this in early September just to see what it was about, with no commitment to follow through, and made the decision then and there to quit. It has indeed been easy. That book really gave me a paradigm shift about what alcohol really is and what it does to your body, etc.

I've been meaning to make a thread on this.

Since I quit drinking, I feel like a brand new man, seriously. I've lost 4 1/2 inches around my waist already and 5 inches around my stomach. I work out twice a day, my work productivity is starting to gain some real momentum, and I've turned into a morning person when I was often going to bed at 5 - 8am even when sober.

I could go on and on. Read the book.

As for going out, I still go out and play pool sometimes. I don't bother with pretending I'm drinking. The reason people walk around with a drink in their hand all night is because alcohol is dehydrating, even though it's a liquid. If you're drinking juice or water, you get tired of it after one or two, but since most people are addicted to alcohol, we convince ourselves it makes sense to walk around with a drink in our hands all night.

By following this strange habit, you're instilling the idea in your mind that you've made a sacrifice by quitting, which is not the case - it's one of the best decisions you've ever made, possibly the best. Own it. There's a real subconscious power in that.

I will say, however, that as time goes on I'm really starting to see a pointlessness in going out. We convince ourselves that we go out to have a good time and that the alcohol is just an "accessory." But think about it, would you have fun sitting around a table with friends for hours upon hours if it weren't for the booze? Not at all. You'd be bored out of your mind.

We go for the booze and the booze is all that makes it bearable. Bars and the conversations that go down there are actually pretty boring (much of the "fun" is an inebriated illusion). I'm going to start focusing more on day game. The women on the nightlife scene also are going down in value a lot for me when not drinking.

I'll probably always go out sometimes but I think it's best to stick with places where I have something to do or a purpose for being there - playing pool, eating, listening to band, catching up with a friend, etc. Your reason could be approaching, but it seems to make more sense to approach women in your daily life.

I'm in Asia right now and you're right that not drinking here can be a challenge - this would be much more acceptable in the U.S. People aren't as used to independent thinkers who make out of the box decisions in Asia. That said, there is also a pretty large subset of Asians in most countries that are real purists and big believers in clean living. Most don't go out at night and will typically be met in the daytime.

And there are so many things I never got around to doing in Asia because I was hungover or partying. It's crazy how much time a partier burns up on "socializing." With that illusion gone, there are a ton of interesting things to check out and/or learn.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #7

"Problem is, those are the most boring people on earth."

^^^Exactly.

In fact I don't think there's ever been a great playboy or shit even athlete who doesn't smoke and drink.

When I get buried, I'm requesting a pack of cigs and a bottle of premium vodka buried with me.

Post: #8

(11-08-2013 09:21 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(11-08-2013 09:12 PM)torontokid Wrote:  Go out with people who don't drink.

Problem is, those are the most boring people on earth.

I don't disagree with that. Dudes who drink are 10 times more fun to hang out with.

Some of the best memories I've had involve alcohol.

However, alcohol has side effects so I leave drinking for pre-determined periods of time(like vacation or a special day). I know plenty of solid players who stick to being sober most of the time.

Post: #9

Give it a try: http://www.returnofkings.com/18097/why-y...sober-game

Post: #10

I've been drinking during the week and weekend for a few weeks now, partying like it's 1999 with all my coworkers. What's most useful here is to get a soda with bitters or just a glass of soda water with ice. Tell people you're doing Atkins and it's a low-carb mixed drink *(outright lies)* and be the DD. If you're (hopefully) getting laid you shouldn't really give a shit about being drunk anyway, just act drunk if need be. Nobody knows what the hell soda and bitters are anyway since nobody orders it, ever.

It might get irritating to be around drunk people though. Have fun by talking shit.

Post: #11

I think nightlife is largely a bust without booze, but I do respect a dude doesn't drink. If a guy is not worth knowing then that will be the case with or without booze. I'm a heavy drinker most of the time but when I step away from it I notice the level of focus and energy I have that goes into fitness and money goes through the roof. My emotions also stabilize significantly, less of the roller coast of euphoria and depression that I tend to be on. I'll get more satisfaction from a bang and be more affected by rejection if I am boozing, and if I am not boozing then girls, deadlifts and getting ahead at work are all just part of the stable and productive routine. Unfortunately I struggle to drink in moderation, I tend to either booze too hard or not at all. But as far as nightlife, I'd rather be in a coffee shop than a bar if I am not drinking. My teens and twenties were full of reckless drunken antics that sober people would never find themselves involved in. But having just entered my thirties I'm finding that I would rather end my day with a nice dinner at home and a (mostly) sober and condom-less bang with a friendly girl from the coffee shop or grocery store instead of a horrible club slut. I guess I'm growing up?

Post: #12

(11-08-2013 09:21 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(11-08-2013 09:12 PM)torontokid Wrote:  Go out with people who don't drink.

Problem is, those are the most boring people on earth.

Depends upon your definition of boring. People who do not drink are usually more natural, sober thinking, modest and kind. If we stop getting brainwashed by the TV daily, which manipulates our consciousness into thinking that getting drunk and stupid is great fun then we may star more wholesome life.

Post: #13

^^ "Wholesome" is a tricky concept.

Post: #14

The Allen Carr book is damn good. I'd also recommend Craig Beck, "Alcohol Lied to Me." I've listened to the audiobook several times, and it helps. Haven't tried the included hypnosis tracks.

Post: #15

When i go out i go out just for pussy, and i don't think alcohol or smoking can help me in any way to get pussy, on the contrary it is a block for a couple of reasons 1) girls for sure prefer a fresh and clean guy than one that stinks of alcohol or cigarettes, i've been told this more than once; 2) my game is pretty shit, if i act as i really am i'll never ever get pussy, if i drink the dickhead that is in me will come out and i'll just start saying and doing bullshit, i really have to control myself 100% to get pussy. In addition if i am sober i enjoy girls much more, both while banging and just while making out in the club, i also notice many more things that you don't see if you're drunk, and finally i'm quite obsessed with my look, smoking and drinking are enemies to be good-looking.

Post: #16

I'm going to echo the thoughts on Allen Carr books. His quit smoking book is just as great and makes quitting a breeze.

Post: #17

This is a great thread I have trouble with. I always feel awkward & wooden in a bar or restaurant until I have a drink or two to loosen up and then conversation, dancing and laughs flow more easily. But then one drink turns into 10. So like OP's thread title suggests, "how do I do nightlife without drinking?" I still want to go out, but just do it without alcohol. Plus, in my town alcohol is such a staple, that I don't know one person who doesn't drink who goes out. So is it more controlling my drinking (which has so far proven impossible) or is it learning to be social without drinking (which has also proven impossible).

Post: #18

(11-09-2013 09:26 AM)Pyre Wrote:  This is a great thread I have trouble with. I always feel awkward & wooden in a bar or restaurant until I have a drink or two to loosen up and then conversation, dancing and laughs flow more easily. But then one drink turns into 10. So like OP's thread title suggests, "how do I do nightlife without drinking?" I still want to go out, but just do it without alcohol. Plus, in my town alcohol is such a staple, that I don't know one person who doesn't drink who goes out. So is it more controlling my drinking (which has so far proven impossible) or is it learning to be social without drinking (which has also proven impossible).

Try putting a precise rather than a casual limit on it. Make it a rule to not have more than three drinks. If your friends give you a hard time about it tell them to fuck off. As an experiment see if you can go for a month without having more than three drinks in an evening, and tell yourself at the start that if you fail then that makes you a loser.

Post: #19

The only fun people who don't drink are people who USED TO BOOZE heavy.

Bars are a total mind-boring waste of time. Bunch of people standing around drinking overpriced alcohol and sitting in uncomfortable chairs. I'd take a restaurant any day of the week over that.

Clubs are fun because I get to see young, hot gyrating ass.

I usually drink a bitters-soda so it looks like I am drinking. Perception is reality....

Nightlife is very monotonous, but I play games w/myself to keep the fun up. Things I do to keep myself entertained-
1) Playing spot the "simp". Dudes are often clueless to how much girls use them.
2) Trying to guess girl's nationalities. I've actually gotten really good at this. Last week, I nailed on my first guess that a chick was French Morrocan.
3) Watching girls run away from over-aggresive guys. Real- life animal planet
4) Watching all the spicy chicas run around in sexy clothes
5) Smoke a joint

Keep in mind, I still do drink minimally BUT a DUI is too big of a risk.

Post: #20

I had a thought about this thread earlier while I was out playing pool. If you don't want to drink anymore but are really set on staying in the nightlife scene, I think the best course would be to either own a bar or work in a bar. In fact, I think the only time it would make sense to own a bar is if you didn't drink, as the temptation to become a hard-core alkie over time is just too great.

But if it doesn't appeal to you as a biz venture (plenty reasons for it not to), the way to go would be to work in a bar at least for a little while. Nobody would wonder why you weren't drinking, so no reason for you to feel awkward. Seeing people wasted all the time can be a good case for not boozing (lol) and most importantly, you'd get used to being normal and social in a drinking environment. If that's an issue for you, it would be a good way to build that comfort.

And of course there's all types of drunk bznitches staggering around for you to game while working.

Again, there are plenty of other ways to get laid besides going out, but if you really want to partake in the scene after dark and are struggling, this would be a cool way to adapt.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #21

(11-09-2013 04:03 AM)angel9468 Wrote:  

(11-08-2013 09:21 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(11-08-2013 09:12 PM)torontokid Wrote:  Go out with people who don't drink.

Problem is, those are the most boring people on earth.

Depends upon your definition of boring. People who do not drink are usually more natural, sober thinking, modest and kind. If we stop getting brainwashed by the TV daily, which manipulates our consciousness into thinking that getting drunk and stupid is great fun then we may star more wholesome life.

Yeah, that is what I mean; boring.

Hell, I just got bored reading those words.

Post: #22

I cut down to a limit of 2-3 pints of beer, but I find even that drags me down.

I am finding more and more what put the "toxic" in intoxicated, so I am just going to cut it out altogether unless there's a special occasion.

Post: #23

I didn't drink for 4 years back in the day. I was more fit, felt better, went to the gym 5-7 days a week, scooped more women and better looking women than i ever had in my life. Even when I started drinking again I reaped the benefits I sewed for about a year or so. currently I'm on the water wagon. There is no reason you shouldn't be able to go out and play just because your not drinking. Plus you can drive everywhere. while you're at the bar, club, discotech just order a sprite in a tumbler with a lemon in it so you create the illusion that your on the same page as every one else if it's that big a deal. Me I don't give a fuck and just drink a bottle of water. At the end of the night everyone will be wasted and you'll be spitting the tightest game in the venue.

Post: #24

(12-09-2013 05:27 AM)birdrussell Wrote:  I didn't drink for 4 years back in the day. I was more fit, felt better, went to the gym 5-7 days a week, scooped more women and better looking women than i ever had in my life. Even when I started drinking again I reaped the benefits I sewed for about a year or so. currently I'm on the water wagon. There is no reason you shouldn't be able to go out and play just because your not drinking. Plus you can drive everywhere. while you're at the bar, club, discotech just order a sprite in a tumbler with a lemon in it so you create the illusion that your on the same page as every one else if it's that big a deal. Me I don't give a fuck and just drink a bottle of water. At the end of the night everyone will be wasted and you'll be spitting the tightest game in the venue.

I hear you and think it's great you are doing this, but honestly for me right now it's just not doable. I work a lot and have a high stress environment and really enjoy drinking and going out. I try more and more to limit my alcohol intake, but sometimes I just need a release, and on nights out with buddies it's too much fun not to drink. And if I'm out solo chasing women or on a date I need a drink or two to get going, and also to get the women in the mood as well.

If I were not working much and had half the stress and more time to pick and choose my battles, then I think I'd end up drinking less from Thursday - Friday. Or at least I'd be able to handle my alcohol better!

That said, I think it's good to occasionally go off the sauce for a few days or even a couple of weeks or a month just to 'reset' your body a bit and de-tox. And one thing I've been trying to do more and more during late nights out is to forego the last 1-2 drinks at the end of the night and drink water instead. This allows be to to become a little more sharp at the end of the evening, sleep better and also have less of a hangover the next day. Of course, it's tricky to do, but if I can do it it makes a tremendous difference for me the next day.

Post: #25

Ive cut down a lot, I too faced the same problems as other members of the board.

I tried drinking limonatas instead, shits delicious and goes well with food (tons of acid) instead of wine.

Brios are great too, if you can find them.

Else, there is nothing else to do but to sack up and hit it sober... it takes a while getting used to it, but once you can mack on chicks stone cold sober and get places, you know you are golden.