Post: #1

The phrases " Don't give a fuck about what people think" and " Don't seek approval " get thrown around here a lot. And i realized a few minutes ago that both pieces of advice are pure Bullshit !

Let me explain !

I was just watching Game of Thrones until a few minutes ago and this line hit me ....

" I don't care what people think " Jamie Lannister

" No, you want people to think that you don't care what they think" Tywin Lannister

I paused and started thinking.

I always thought it was cool projecting to people this image that you don't give a fuck. But trying to make people think that you don't give a fuck means you actually do really give more of a fuck that the person who just acts normal and is following the herd.

As Men, we seek admiration & respect from our peers , accolades for our accomplishments and attention from women.

Don't you enjoy the glances you get from women walking in a tank after a hardcore lifting session ? Attention

Don't you love when your guy friends ask you for Job application advice when you landed your dream job ? the nods and respect they project towards you ? Admiration & Respect

Don't you love it when your Professor calls you to his office and tells you the paper you wrote was the best he's seen in half a decade ? Recognition

At all of these instances i tried to act aloof , like I didn't care while my insides were tingling.

So lets please be honest with ourselves and stop this " I don't care about anyone " Bullshit. Every single one of us do. We are social creatures. Thinking otherwise is just lying to yourself.

I'd go as far as saying the number one Emotional need of men is Admiration.

In the old days Millions of men have died for " Glory" , for the chance that maids will sing their names and little boys would aspire to be like them.

So please ... channel that need for approval into something positive like achievement instead of something lame like following trends.

Good Night Brahs !

Post: #2

Approval is great from two different groups of people.

Respectable men you admire and women you want to fuck.

Post: #3

(05-07-2013 12:26 AM)LibertarianBootyHunter Wrote:  The phrases " Don't give a fuck about what people think" and " Don't seek approval " get thrown around here a lot. And i realized a few minutes ago that both pieces of advice are pure Bullshit !

Let me explain !

I was just watching Game of Thrones until a few minutes ago and this line hit me ....

" I don't care what people think " Jamie Lannister

" No, you want people to think that you don't care what they think" Tywin Lannister

I paused and started thinking.

I always thought it was cool projecting to people this image that you don't give a fuck. But trying to make people think that you don't give a fuck means you actually do really give more of a fuck that the person who just acts normal and is following the herd.

As Men, we seek admiration & respect from our peers , accolades for our accomplishments and attention from women.

Don't you enjoy the glances you get from women walking in a tank after a hardcore lifting session ? Attention

Don't you love when your guy friends ask you for Job application advice when you landed your dream job ? the nods and respect they project towards you ? Admiration & Respect

Don't you love it when your Professor calls you to his office and tells you the paper you wrote was the best he's seen in half a decade ? Recognition

At all of these instances i tried to act aloof , like I didn't care while my insides were tingling.

So lets please be honest with ourselves and stop this " I don't care about anyone " Bullshit. Every single one of us do. We are social creatures. Thinking otherwise is just lying to yourself.

I'd go as far as saying the number one Emotional need of men is Admiration.

In the old days Millions of men have died for " Glory" , for the chance that maids will sing their names and little boys would aspire to be like them.

So please ... channel that need for approval into something positive like achievement instead of something lame like following trends.

Good Night Brahs !

1. As a man we do not seek admiration we are doing what we believe is right.
2. Admiration and Respect comes with time and its never achieved by one thing but small little things. I don't care about admiration.
3. Recognition useless cause I prefer people that says nothing what I'm doing right, because I'm doing the task for 110% of my abilities.

The only thing most man want at least in my opinion is respect rest of these things are irrelevant because I don't give a fuck what other people think.

Reassuming If you go with your moral code always and do your job as best as you can you shouldn't care what other think of you.

Post: #4

No, there is a difference.

The fact that you have to project "not giving a fuck" truly means that you do, which you have clearly came to that conclusion with this thread.

The difference is, the people who truly do not give a fuck, they do not say these words, their expressions, their demeanour gives off the vibe that they do not give a fuck. It does not need to put into words. You will realise it when you see it.

Post: #5

I think alot of people don't give a fuck about what people think of them. I am one myself. But you never see them much since by definition they are the very people who tend not to achieve fame and glory.

It is a self-selecting group in that regard.

And the admiration of other people is fine - but for alot of people it is not relevent to the goals they set themselves. There is no right or wrong here. But - for me I could happily live on a desert island - as long as I had books, internet, bourbon and great food. And I think alot of others could as well - which kinda' proves that fame and glory are not important to some people.

Still - you make a good point that alot of people pretend not to give a shit. When really they do...

On a separate point. If I wrote the greatest book ever written - I would be just as tempted to burn it as to publish it. Provided I didn't need the money. I honestly don't care about other people's admiration. That is something I got over when I was a teenager. But I am a bit of a MGTOW - so maybe I'm in the minority - /thread-21040.html

Post: #6

No, you've got the wrong simplifed advice.

It is not, "Don't care what people think"

It is, "Don't care what people think about you."

See the difference? The first is being retarded; obviously you should care what others think and you should aim to learn from others for your own benefit. The second is being a man; you don't need to care if people think you are a loser or dressing poorly or if the girl says you are a creep.

You need the truth about the world, but you don't need opinions about yourself on whether or not you're cool or not. A man needs results and not opinions.

Post: #7

There's a flip side to that coin, young man.

What if the girls didn't look at you?

What if the professor told you that you were a shit student and should drop out of college and mop floors?

What if your friends thought you were never going to get a job?

So, you believe them when they tell you that you are brilliant, but what about when they tell you that you are an idiot?

Personally, I don't listen to what people say about me, good or bad. That shit will go to your head.

Post: #8

It is a very freeing experience when you no longer care what other people think. I don't think I have given a shit since I was about 15.

I mean I don't give a shit how successful or unsuccessful my friends are. Or how good they look. Or how happy they are with partners. And so on. So - I imagine they feel the same way about me. And any ups and downs in my life are just minor irrelevent blips in their lives. Which is the way it should be.

Life is stressful enough without having to worry about what other people think.

Post: #9

(05-07-2013 12:49 AM)Samseau Wrote:  No, you've got the wrong simplifed advice.

It is not, "Don't care what people think"

It is, "Don't care what people think about you."

See the difference? The first is being retarded; obviously you should care what others think and you should aim to learn from others for your own benefit. The second is being a man; you don't need to care if people think you are a loser or dressing poorly or if the girl says you are a creep.

You need the truth about the world, but you don't need opinions about yourself on whether or not you're cool or not. A man needs results and not opinions.

Agreed, I wish more younger guys besides myself got this.

In fact I think that this is one of the more important underlying causes of the beta epidemic in the under 20 crowd today. Its sad really I see a lot of guys who are otherwise kinda cool doing girly shit like wearing tight jeans for attention and then claiming its because their "edgy".

Post: #10

If you really didn't give a shit, you wouldn't use deodorant, and would probably get fat and jerk off and shit in public regardless of who was watching. There are guys who do that, but they usually aren't banging models.

Post: #11

I hate speaking theoretically. So I'll speak from experience.

I had all of that. I had the attention, the admiration, the success, the respect, the value, the glory, all the awards and certificates, the bullshit plaques, the letterman jacket, all of it. It meant something to me. Maybe even everything. Then after everything stopped being shiny and the the cloud parted, I wanted more of it. I needed the pat on the back, I needed to be told I was doing a good job, and I needed people to tell me they loved me. I loved telling my stories, and proving to people how great I was.

Then one day I got sick. Really sick. And none of it mattered. None of those things I accomplished could do anything to make me get better. None of it kept the people I needed love & praise from in my life when I became the sick guy who they couldn't have fun with. I learned that it was all for show, and none of it would make my grave any more comfortable. I stopped caring about it all.

I then started my road to recovery. I lifted every weight, and put down every poisonous candy bar and fried food. I made changes. I developed real skills. Skills that not every person can say they have. I surrounded myself with the few people who actually care about me as a person and not me as the prospect. I brought myself back to health, and learned the true value of taking care of myself. I made myself happy. Now I just sit back and listen to the other people who have yet to grow and swallow the "red pill" with a smile on my face.

Nobody did it to or for me.

I still enjoy women, like anyone else. But, I don't care about any of the bull shit like I used to. I want a good woman (for ME), and I want to make a good family (for US). That's all I want in the end.

Post: #12

(05-08-2013 12:02 AM)soup Wrote:  If you really didn't give a shit, you wouldn't use deodorant, and would probably get fat and jerk off and shit in public regardless of who was watching. There are guys who do that, but they usually aren't banging models.

Manipulating people to get what you want from them is not the same thing as caring about their opinions of you.

I act in specific ways to get what I want all the time - doesn't mean I actually care what they are feeling.

Post: #13

Best thing to do is only care about what people think about you if you admire that person's character, accomplishments, judgment. I ignore most people unless I have a reason to value what they say.

When my mom criticizes me, she is usually just emoting. She has cried wolf one too many times. When my father criticizes me, I tend to listen.

Post: #14

This is the male hamster at work.

Find some game advice, and then focus on the logical implausibility of it.
Find yourself on the wheel, spinning spinning spinning.

WIA