Post: #51

(01-30-2013 02:05 PM)soup Wrote:  

(01-30-2013 02:02 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

(01-30-2013 01:42 PM)soup Wrote:  

(01-30-2013 11:55 AM)Roosh Wrote:  I was on the gym treadmill. Next to me was a girl cooling down while using her phone. She was real cute. I looked at the screen and saw that she was reading MY twitter feed. The odds of that happening must be one in a million, but I couldn't think of an opener.

Are you serious? That's nuts.

You could have opened her by posting shit about her on your twitter as she was reading it.

"I'm sitting next to a girl at xxx gym and she's reading my twitter feed as I write this."

Oh- OK I get it. This is going to become like the "was this beta?" thread.

Nevermind..

Can't top "was having sex but can't think of an opener" .

Damn, you got to it first!

Post: #52

(01-30-2013 06:29 AM)Handsome Creepy Eel Wrote:  "Is that a good phone?"

Hey, isn't that the iPhone 7Q?!

Post: #53

Post: #54

OK guys, no more joking around. I need some advice on something:

This cute girl walked up to me and was like, "It's so cold out here. I wish I had a cool guy--preferably with an account at the RVF--to keep me warm."

I wanted to say something, but I couldn't think of an opener.

   

Post: #55

Tuthmosis, where'd you find that picture of my girlfriend?

Post: #56

I was banging my main. Her friend was sitting there naked. She watched quietly. Couldn't think of an opener. Awkward.

Post: #57

A girl walked up to me, pointed both her forefingers at herself and said "open this one-set" but I couldn't think of an opener.

Post: #58

Was expecting a lengthy story of the daily routine caliber, Tuthmosis.
Step your game up!

Post: #59

It's was probably Mrs Chocolate on her ipad

Post: #60

I was dancing, and the only 10 I've seen in the flesh in my life walked up to me, and said "Hi handsome. I like the way you move. I've always had a fantasy of having sex with a guy whose name I don't even know".

My heart rate accelerated, my hands went clammy, I had never encountered anything like this before. Surely this is the stuff of fantasy....

My lips parted and a soft wisp of air exhaled as if about to form words.

One of her hands held mine. With the other, she raised a finger to my lips, "Shhhh....", she smiled, "It's OK hun....you don't have to say a thing".

I looked down at the ground, feeling inadequate in not being able to prove I am a man. I even told her how I felt...

"Sorry babe... I can't think of an opener....."

I turned around and walked away, shoulders slumped and feeling dejected.

Post: #61

I was looking for a pet store, when I saw a girl walking towards me with a bag from Petsmart.

I couldn't think of an opener.

Post: #62

Alright alright, guys hear me out. Enough of the horse play, let's be serious for a minute.

The other day I caught a girl lurking on the RVF. She looked perplexed and confused, as she was trying to write up a data sheet.

I wanted to tell her you can't register to post until the 1st as it reduces trolls, but I couldn't think of an opener.

Post: #63

Stop fucking around guys, I need some help on this situation:

I was doing a plumbing job for this cougar down the road, and as I walked in she said, "Gee, I haven't got any money. I'll have to think of another way to pay you." I thought to myself wtf.. I only take cash.

Anyway, As I was working she looked at my crotch and said, "I'm sure you have a big enough tool for the job."

I wasn't sure whether she was interested, and I felt a bit weird with her being there wrapped up in just a towel. Normally, I'd try and game her, but I couldn't think of an opener.

Post: #64

(01-30-2013 03:24 PM)Charlemagne In Sweatpants Wrote:  I was departing from Troy the other day. After being driven off-course, I blinded a cyclops with a wooden stake, was cursed by the god of the sea, saw my fleet get destroyed by giant cannibals, survived a shipwreck by clinging to a fig tree, was imprisoned on an island for seven years as a sex slave, escaped on a raft built by my own hands, shot an arrow through a dozen axe heads to win a woman's hand and then slayed all of her suitors.

I really wanted to say something to her, but I couldn't think of an opener.

"Hey, can I get a female opinion on something?"

You gotta go indirect in these cases bro

Post: #65

I was at a college basketball game last night and there were so many fine young girls around me. I had a press row seat and a cute freshman girl asked me if she could sit next to me but I couldn't think of an opener.

Post: #66

(01-29-2013 06:35 PM)Mikev75 Wrote:  While at my son's indoor soccer practice i noticed that one of the moms had this forum open on her phone. (7.5) Can't decide if that's a good or bad sign. I wanted to make a comment to her but didn't come up with anything good.

"Which forum member would you bang? Cause if it's Ali-B, today is your lucky day!"

Post: #67

This might be my favorite thread to date.

Post: #68

(01-30-2013 07:15 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

Clumpy mascara, 2/10, WNB.

Post: #69

This chick, she wanted anal, her asshole was so tight, I couldn't think of an opener.

Post: #70

(01-30-2013 08:26 PM)Lucky Wrote:  A girl walked up to me, pointed both her forefingers at herself and said "open this one-set" but I couldn't think of an opener.

Haha. If that happened IRL, I would seriously think I was starring in my own version of the Truman Show.

Post: #71

(02-03-2013 03:09 PM)UnW Wrote:  This chick, she wanted anal, her asshole was so tight, I couldn't think of an opener.

Try some lube. That'll open'er.

Post: #72

(02-03-2013 06:04 PM)Walderschmidt Wrote:  

(02-03-2013 03:09 PM)UnW Wrote:  This chick, she wanted anal, her asshole was so tight, I couldn't think of an opener.

Try some lube. That'll open'er.

You mean high viscosity stool pusher.

Post: #73

(01-30-2013 10:21 AM)Roosh Wrote:  While at the coffee shop today, I saw a girl reading The 48 Laws Of Power, one of my favorite books of all time. I got really excited, but I couldn't think of an opener.

Is that the 48 Laws of Power you are reading? I love that book. Have you read the 33 strategies of war?

Post: #74

(01-30-2013 10:36 AM)kenny_powers Wrote:  I was sitting at the bar last night, a girl sitting alone ordered a MacAllan 12 neat, one of my favorite Scotches. I got really excited, but I didn't know what to say.

Did you just order scotch? I thought all women ordered their liquor with coke.

Post: #75

I tuned into this thread about to make another opener joke when I realized some newbie (renotime)can't tell we are screwing around. I was wanted to break it to him gently, but couldn't think of an opener.