Post: #26

(01-12-2013 09:22 PM)DVY Wrote:  The more I think about it, the more grateful I am that people hate. Its the best caliper that I am going in the right direction.

When people's hate on certain topics turns toward ambivalence/hate/jealousy , ITS TIME TO CHARGE AHEAD.
When it turns towards acceptance, ITS TIME TO TREAD CAREFULLY
When it turns to mass worship, ITS TIME TO QUIT. Move unto other endeavors/location.

This.

Also, when they see your lifestyle is so fun, it makes them question their entire chore beliefs and their decisions in life and doing so make them very incomfortable. It reminds them of how they are stuck where they are, in a J.O.B. they hate, in a relationship they can't stand, unfullfilled, living pay cheque to pay cheque, dragging themselves from monday to friday to the office to a soul crushing, mind numbing, useless dead end job or worse, that they put a ring on a girl who went from sweet and slim to a fat, self entitled mega bitch and with 1 or 2 unbearably spoilt little devils for kids? And then, you come and tell them how you are living it up, traveling at a whim, to wherever your fancy takes you, for weeks, if not months a time, with short notice, with no one to answer but yourself, banging hot exotic girls? No doubt there's going to be a shit ton of haters.

I get this hate and get questioned all the time, so much that I don't even bother as I've become immune to it and half expect it nowadays. lol There's not one single family gathering where relatives and close family, including siblings always ask me to grow up, get a normal life like everyone else, in a normal career, and to settle down. Oh boy, how much I hate with an immense passion that term, to settle down. Even the sound of it makes me want to jump off a cliff before doing it. I equate "settling down" with letting go of my dreams and to accept what little crumbles I can get. lol

Countless people have been cut off my from my circle so much that whenever i return home, I only have a handful of like minded guys I can freely talk about my past travels and future ones. The ones that are deeply buried into their normal, mainstream existence feel heavily threatened by my total refusal of their way of living. And when I tell them about the wonders of Asia, the delicacies of South America, they look at me and all they have to say, is but then why are all these people dying to come to Canada or the US, in a condescending tone? I don't even bother and a couple of times, replied back, for what? to end up in a miserable position like you? stuck for life to a mortgage you can't afford and a fat, bitchy pork of a wife that rules and controls your every move? Needless to say it didn't go well with those guys...I wonder why...lol...It's really ridiculous, you see alphas who end up as the biggest pussies out there, where they have to literally ask the Boss permission to go put gas in the car, to spend their own freaking money that they work like dogs for while the fat hog is sitting at home or having sushi with her equally fat bitchy friends for lunch on HIS dime? What's wrong with guys sometimes? makes you want to bitch slap the crap out of them to wake up from this nightmare. Anyone of you guys have friends like that? How do you deal with it?I simply cut them off and I won't surprised to see them crawling back to me after they've been ass raped in court after the Boss left them? lol Truly sad....

As to the infinitely superior quality of women in those parts of the world, I don't even talk about it anymore. I don't even mention it to my once boys as they are way too burried into the rabid and too beta to even think of getting out. it's not that I haven't tried to show them the light and even invited them to come party with me in my trips. I even offered to pay all the expenses of a couple of guys to come once to Brasil and another to Thailand and even on my last trip to HKG/China/Phils, I told one of my buddies that I'd be taking care of all their expenses as long as they pay for their airfare and that I would garantee them to have the time of their life and see a different, a much better, more fun and more fullfilling way to live, but they still managed to chicken out at the end. Oh well, they're loss, certainly not mine.

Great thread and awesome post OG, I've been thinking and going through about this very same topic continously for the past god knows how long. You and others in here perfectly nailed it.

Someone, I believe it was brianmark, wrote that he'd take traveling to some 3rd world country for a long time over a new shiny Mercedes. Me too brother every freaking day and thrice on sundays! I almost bought a shiny either C class or a 328 BMW last summer and it woud have set me back about 50Gs as I was getting a lot of pressure from family that I'd needed to have a car. Boy was I right that I got back to my senses and didn't buy it!!! 50K up front+ at least 1k in insurance and expenses for the car each month? All of that for what? To impress people I couldn't care less about, with women who behave like frat boys and are fat and display a huge fattitude and sense of entitlement, where taxes are through the roof? In a place that I can't stand and I feel I'm suffocating each day that I'm here? Hell freaking no way!!!! I'll take that 50G's and travel and live for 2 years in GZ, China to build a lucrative global business while enjoying an even sicker lifestyle or live in a tropical country either in SEA or in SA or even in some industrical shithole in CCCP.

Bottom line is, when you start getting heat and hated on, rejoice in it as it tells you without any shadow of a doubt, that you are in the right path and that the small minded people, are trying their damnest to bring you down cause they hate seeing others raise above their mediocrity and go onto live life on their own terms!

Keep traveling and be thirsty brothers and keep on banging those exotic girls around the globe!

Post: #27

@VP- if you are going to get set back 50Gs might as well save up a little more and buy an LS. Sticker is 65, but you can get it for 62. C-class and 3-series are entry starter luxury cars that aren't much better than regular cars. Its a regular car w/a logo slapped on it.

On a side note, my buddy went to a police auction and bought a 6-month old 5-series for 35k. It has F1-shifters and all. Maybe a thought to look into.... I dont really know BMWs but i would guess the sticker on this sort of car is in the mid to high 60s.

Post: #28

(01-12-2013 03:31 PM)lush1 Wrote:  I find the opposite to be true! Everyone I meet is of the facebook generation 18-30 where all they see is peoples pics on facebook of thailand etc and they think that if you haven't spent a month in Thailand then you're not cool. The thing is they only go because its the craze and they are just copying each other in most cases. So yea, I find when I tell people I don t really have much interest in visiting Asia or South America people look down as me as not being ain the cool facebook pics gang.

Going to Thailand is a standard holiday for someone from the UK, not from USA. Americans are some of the least traveled people in the Western world with our standard two week vacations. You get 3 weeks only after 5 years. If they do travel it may be a cruise or Cancun, nothing the least bit cultural.

Post: #29

DVY,
I know and that's precisely why I didn't buy it. As I said, I'd much rather use that cash to travel and build a solid business that putting it towards a very fast depreciating asset like a car. The only car I'd buy will be an Aston Martin DB9 but that'll be only from the profits of my business in China.

Post: #30

(01-12-2013 03:31 PM)lush1 Wrote:  I find the opposite to be true! Everyone I meet is of the facebook generation 18-30 where all they see is peoples pics on facebook of thailand etc and they think that if you haven't spent a month in Thailand then you're not cool. The thing is they only go because its the craze and they are just copying each other in most cases. So yea, I find when I tell people I don t really have much interest in visiting Asia or South America people look down as me as not being ain the cool facebook pics gang.

If you went to Thailand before "The Beach" came out, you were cool.

If you went after, not so much. You certainly can't consider yourself a "pioneer".

Post: #31

Thailand is one of those 'acceptable' destinations. Everyone seems to be going so it's less likely to provoke snarky comments. However, most off the beaten path places probably will.

Post: #32

(01-13-2013 02:51 PM)Caligula Wrote:  Thailand is one of those 'acceptable' destinations. Everyone seems to be going so it's less likely to provoke snarky comments.

I find Thailand gets more snarky comments than anywhere else. About hookers, ladyboys, and gold diggers. At least in America.

People like to insinuate that's all there is.

I can't tell you how many people who've never even left the country have lectured me on how all thai girls just want my money or a green card. Not even pointing out the obvious flaws in that logic, why would someone think they're better educated on a place they've never been than someone who lived there 5 years?

I had no issues with women when in the states and managed to dodge marriage my whole life, leaving a broken trail of hearts behind me, and suddenly I need relationship coaches to save me?

Ridiculous.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #33

Its seems everyone under the age of 30 goes to Thailand in the UK, which is interesting because surely USA is a lot closer. But as I said most people aren't going for the culture etc more so they can put the pics on Facebook just like everyone else. Baaaa

Post: #34

Quote:Its seems everyone under the age of 30 goes to Thailand in the UK, which is interesting because surely USA is a lot closer

Tell me more.

I'm putting together my list of moves to combat this and my list of things that have actually happened to people I know who travel and have suffered the wrath of hate.

I think this thread is going to be 100+ pages

Post: #35

A couple guys at work seem to get extremely aggravated at how frugal I am. "Why don't you enjoy your money a little" they say. One guy always tries to look out for people and says to me "promise me that one day you will enjoy it". I mention to them how I have worked 1 year in the last 3 and spent the other 2 traveling. That I have lived abroad 4 years. I always just get this odd look then they turn around.

My friends back home basically wont talk with me about traveling. They don't exactly hate but they don't want to hear it, which is perfectly fine with me.

I noticed in the post that a few other members choose to live a simple life while home in order to save for traveling. I have been wondering how I became so "cheap" over the last few years, and now I think I have the answer. It is because I value my future travel more than a nice car, bigger TV, nice furniture, or whatever else I could blow money on unnecessarily.

Post: #36

Easy argument for travel hate conversations:
Psychological studies show time and again that the biggest long term value beyond basic necessities is gained from experiences, not things. I will remember my 2005 trip to Mexico for the rest of my life, along with some Spanish I picked up. How about that equally pricey 2005 tv my brother bought? It's valued at a few bucks now and all he has as memories are the watched reruns of Oprah or whatever show his wife fancied.

Post: #37

(01-13-2013 09:35 PM)Jaydublin Wrote:  My friends back home basically wont talk with me about traveling. They don't exactly hate but they don't want to hear it, which is perfectly fine with me.

This is it for me.

People basically don't want to hear it.

I have written many times about how success and happiness are great temperature gauges for your real friends, and people that really care about you.

People that don't want to hear about your success and happiness are not your real friends.

Post: #38

(01-13-2013 06:01 PM)lush1 Wrote:  Its seems everyone under the age of 30 goes to Thailand in the UK, which is interesting because surely USA is a lot closer. But as I said most people aren't going for the culture etc more so they can put the pics on Facebook just like everyone else. Baaaa

From the East Coast of the US, it's harder to find a longer flight in the world.

It's about 9k miles to BKK from NYC.

Post: #39

(01-13-2013 10:52 PM)MaleDefined Wrote:  

(01-13-2013 06:01 PM)lush1 Wrote:  Its seems everyone under the age of 30 goes to Thailand in the UK, which is interesting because surely USA is a lot closer. But as I said most people aren't going for the culture etc more so they can put the pics on Facebook just like everyone else. Baaaa

From the East Coast of the US, it's harder to find a longer flight in the world.

It's about 9k miles to BKK from NYC.

Don't speak too soon guys... Currently have three outstanding offers to go to the Olympic games in 2016 in Rio...

These guys have negative game, are moneyed up and ready to "have the greatest vacation ever" in 2016... Even ballsy enough to ask me to "invite my friends from there"... No way in hell.

Hate to say it but that will likely be the end of Brasil, considering going again in 2015 right before the inevitable atmospheric explosion that will occur.

Post: #40

(01-13-2013 11:11 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

(01-13-2013 10:52 PM)MaleDefined Wrote:  

(01-13-2013 06:01 PM)lush1 Wrote:  Its seems everyone under the age of 30 goes to Thailand in the UK, which is interesting because surely USA is a lot closer. But as I said most people aren't going for the culture etc more so they can put the pics on Facebook just like everyone else. Baaaa

From the East Coast of the US, it's harder to find a longer flight in the world.

It's about 9k miles to BKK from NYC.

Don't speak too soon guys... Currently have three outstanding offers to go to the Olympic games in 2016 in Rio...

These guys have negative game, are moneyed up and ready to "have the greatest vacation ever" in 2016... Even ballsy enough to ask me to "invite my friends from there"... No way in hell.

Hate to say it but that will likely be the end of Brasil, considering going again in 2015 right before the inevitable atmospheric explosion that will occur.

You should go before then. A little thing called the World Cup is going on in 2014.

Post: #41

Travel = people will hate

Make money = people will hate

Bang bitches = people will hate

Be successful = people will hate.

Have game = people will hate

The world is full of haters (losers). The "have nots" will always have hatred for the "haves". This is why many successful people "pretend" to unsuccessful. I know millionaires who drive shitty cars so that they won't attract hate and jealousy.

They just murdered a lottery winner in Chicago. It was probably a jealous friend of family member:

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162-5...e-exhumed/

"Khan's death on July 20 was initially ruled a result of natural causes. But a relative's request for a deeper look resulted in the startling conclusion months later that Kahn was killed with the highly toxic poison as he was about to collect $425,000 in winnings."

Like Jay-Z famously said...

"Broke niggas don't want your cash, they just wanna kill ya"

Post: #42

(01-13-2013 09:54 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(01-13-2013 09:35 PM)Jaydublin Wrote:  My friends back home basically wont talk with me about traveling. They don't exactly hate but they don't want to hear it, which is perfectly fine with me.

This is it for me.

People basically don't want to hear it.

I have written many times about how success and happiness are great temperature gauges for your real friends, and people that really care about you.

People that don't want to hear about your success and happiness are not your real friends.

To add to this point:

If people don't want to hear it when you are happy, those people certainly don't want to help you when you are down.

Post: #43

(01-14-2013 03:35 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(01-13-2013 09:54 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(01-13-2013 09:35 PM)Jaydublin Wrote:  My friends back home basically wont talk with me about traveling. They don't exactly hate but they don't want to hear it, which is perfectly fine with me.

This is it for me.

People basically don't want to hear it.

I have written many times about how success and happiness are great temperature gauges for your real friends, and people that really care about you.

People that don't want to hear about your success and happiness are not your real friends.

To add to this point:

If people don't want to hear it when you are happy, those people certainly don't want to help you when you are down.

Yeah I've recently cut out a guy who I considered "one of my best friends", because he's an absolute hater, who can't stand seeing anyone do better than him. I started to notice the trend about a year ago, his snarky passive aggressive comments, subtle jabs, talking shit about other people's success, the need to constantly try and one up everyone. At first it didn't really bother me, but over time it started to snow ball and it got to the point where I couldn't ignore it any more.

The tipping point was when we were out before Xmas and he blantantly tried to cockblock me with two young cute girls that I had approached and been working with. That was the last straw I basically went off on him, and got all Sigmund Freud on his ass, breaking down how he's a hater, how he's insecure, how he talks shit and tries to one up everyone, coming from a place of low self-esteem.

I'm not one to hold grudges so I've made up with the guy, but have only briefly hung out with him once in the past 4 weeks. Basically, I don't need to surround myself with negative energy and people who are not adding value, but rather subtracting value from my life.

I was going to write up an entire post on "the hater mentality" and conversely the "winner's mentality", but I am tenatively thinking about launching a blog sometime this upcoming spring or summer. I appreciate the positive feedback and I've got plenty more stuff to write about.

Post: #44

(01-13-2013 03:40 AM)brianmark Wrote:  

(01-12-2013 03:31 PM)lush1 Wrote:  I find the opposite to be true! Everyone I meet is of the facebook generation 18-30 where all they see is peoples pics on facebook of thailand etc and they think that if you haven't spent a month in Thailand then you're not cool. The thing is they only go because its the craze and they are just copying each other in most cases. So yea, I find when I tell people I don t really have much interest in visiting Asia or South America people look down as me as not being ain the cool facebook pics gang.

Going to Thailand is a standard holiday for someone from the UK, not from USA. Americans are some of the least traveled people in the Western world with our standard two week vacations. You get 3 weeks only after 5 years. If they do travel it may be a cruise or Cancun, nothing the least bit cultural.

You get 3 weeks & better benefits after 5 years...IF 1) You haven't been laid off yet, or 2) You left for a better job, lifestyle, and opportunity with less BS.

Post: #45

(01-15-2013 02:50 AM)yb13 Wrote:  You get 3 weeks & better benefits after 5 years...IF 1) You haven't been laid off yet, or 2) You left for a better job, lifestyle, and opportunity with less BS.

That's just not healthy. Basically you are having to ignore your passions in favor of the job. Men need time to go do shit by themselves,whether it be travel or go on a binge drinking session for a few weeks. 3 weeks a year ( no doubt spread out into tiny chunks ) allows none of that. There should be 6 weeks holiday every year taken in whatever way you want. That way you could go do men shit for a month in South America or somewhere and then still have two weeks left for other passions. Also every job should allow unpaid leave so if you feel like you need to get out of dodge for a few weeks to refresh then you can.

Why have we allowed this system of overworking to become so ingrained in our culture?

Post: #46

(01-15-2013 04:22 AM)Vorkuta Wrote:  

(01-15-2013 02:50 AM)yb13 Wrote:  You get 3 weeks & better benefits after 5 years...IF 1) You haven't been laid off yet, or 2) You left for a better job, lifestyle, and opportunity with less BS.

That's just not healthy. Basically you are having to ignore your passions in favor of the job. Men need time to go do shit by themselves,whether it be travel or go on a binge drinking session for a few weeks. 3 weeks a year ( no doubt spread out into tiny chunks ) allows none of that. There should be 6 weeks holiday every year taken in whatever way you want. That way you could go do men shit for a month in South America or somewhere and then still have two weeks left for other passions. Also every job should allow unpaid leave so if you feel like you need to get out of dodge for a few weeks to refresh then you can.

Why have we allowed this system of overworking to become so ingrained in our culture?

Welcome to Corporate America...it's exponentially worse for people in the banking or finance industry as they usually get 2 weeks off only..and actually have to use their "strictly alloted" vacation time to spend the holidays with their families.

I'm about to shift into a university based position upon starting my master's program this September, which will help out with tuition reimbursement. I will be getting 3-4 weeks along with 2 weeks during Christmas time making it 5-6 total along with the optional unpaid time off (likely going to use this come thesis report time).

There are some jealous haters in my family at times like my older sister who can travel independently but chooses not to as everybody should "wait for the perfect situation." A lot of my extended family however leaves town for 2 weeks during Christmas time to visit Vietnam or see other family around the US so that's why we have a week long Thanksgiving in Nov and then have extensive celebrations during the Chinese New Year (Anytime Jan-Feb) based on the Lunar Calendar. I've finally come around to traveling around the holidays as of 2011 and will continue to do so in time to come because I'd rather not be home alone.

Post: #47

The UK is similar I'd say

go to Poland, Eastern Europe or the Balkans and it's "frowned" upon ("how many girls did ya shag, was it a stag? what no? why the hell you go there then you naughty bugger ")
go Rome, Paris, Florence, Venice or some shite and it's "How romantic, such lovely cities"
go to anywhere in Spain "ah yeah i've been there, did you go to?"
go to any greek island/ibiza/magaluf/ayia napa "that's wicked, bet it was messy"
go to Thailand - "shag any ladyboys?"
go anywhere far and 'exotic' (south africa, australia, NZ and the carribean basically) - "wow that must have been amazing, bet that cost you a bit of money, you're probably going to have work for a couple of years now with no holiday"

Post: #48

thats why people who have money to travel, and not tied down to day to day 9-5 jobs, ONLY hang out with people in similar positions.

its like people are not on the same level. Some concern different things, the lunch topics are like OH, there is this little sabdwich at asda (mass supermarket) or some stupid shit. who gives a damn. they think differently than the travel/ pua types.

these people were majority of the people in my old accounting company, which was full of loosers.Needless to say i didnt get along with these bastards. its like, i cant stand them at ALL. they are also interested in boring shit.

Post: #49

Its funny you dont really get travel hate in Oz. Pretty much everyone who has money travels and thats why there are always so many freaken Aussies everywhere you go, despite a tiny population. If you travel alot people wont really give a shit about your latest adventures, but you dont get much hate.

Post: #50

So much truth in this thread.

Most of my friends don't ask me much about living in Bangkok. I think it stems partly from jealousy, and partly that they can't even fathom what it's like to live in a foreign country. My best friend made a smart ass remark over Facebook when I mentioned something about my main chick driving me somewhere. He responded with "What!?! An actual car!?! haha". Apparently he, like many other Americans, think Thailand is filled with only poor hookers and ladyboys. Has not the slightest idea what it's really like, and that the streets of Thonglor and Ekkamai and littered with BMWs and Mercedes like the US is with Civics.

His only travel ambitions are to go to Ireland, England and Scotland for 10 days (he wouldn't be able to leave for longer because he has 2 kids and a worthless girlfriend to support. She would never let him leave for 10 days anyways) and spend $10k to "party like Charlie Sheen." I.E. cocaine and bang hookers.

Surprisingly though, I haven't gotten too much hate about Thailand. My time between trips has been spent in my hometown where everyone knows me, and know I've banged half of the town. So they know I don't need to fuck hookers. I thought I would get a lot more hate about it, but I haven't. If I wasn't known for being a player, I think I would get significantly more hate about it.