Post: #1

So this girl (and friend) I've hooked up with a few times in the past just broke up with her boyfriend (also a friend of mine, he was cheating with two other girls) a couple weeks ago. She's single and looking, and I want to ask her out, but our history is complicated and we run in the same social circle. Because of that I've kept my distance from her, and as a result she thinks I'm mad at her and won't stop bringing it up. I've tried to play it off but that hasn't worked. I need some advice on the next step. And yes, though I hesitate to call it oneitis as I'm still banging other girls (she knows this), I definitely have it hard for this girl.

Solutions?

1) Stop being a giant pussy and just ask her out, fuck what everyone else thinks.
2) Continue to keep my distance until things cool off, then make a move.
3) Just get over it, move on, bang other girls.
4) ??

I'm hesitant to wait too long, as this girl will not be on the market for long.

J

Post: #2

(03-26-2012 01:41 PM)Boomtown Wrote:  1) Stop being a giant pussy

I couldn't have said it any better myself.

What about your friend?

Isn't he going to be upset about this?

Post: #3

Can you cook? Can she? Is there some dish you want her to teach you at your place/you want to try out on her?

Does she drink? Is there a bar near your place/her place that you want to check out? Is there a particular drink (beer, wine, a new cocktail) you've heard about and want to try?

It's one thing to say "ask her out". But have something in mind to ask her out to. And something else in mind after that. And if those two don't work, then be flexible while not letting her be controlling.

Post: #4

(03-26-2012 01:46 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  What about your friend?

Isn't he going to be upset about this?

I haven't asked him yet, just seems too soon. I don't think he would mind, eventually anyway.

I'm not worried about what to do on a date--I'm fine there. My concern is the complications arising from going out with her right after their breakup. We share a social circle. I've hooked up with some of her friends, some of whom are obsessed with me. I don't want to be alienated from the group for making a move too quickly, but I obviously don't want to wait too long.

Post: #5

(03-26-2012 01:41 PM)Boomtown Wrote:  And yes, though I hesitate to call it oneitis as I'm still banging other girls (she knows this), I definitely have it hard for this girl.

Does it matter what you call it? Pickup lingo can be useful in easily referring to certain things, but don't miss the forest for trees. As a general rule, don't fall for girls who haven't already fallen for you. Your feelings should always be a step or so behind hers.

Post: #6

(03-26-2012 04:02 PM)Boomtown Wrote:  I've hooked up with some of her friends, some of whom are obsessed with me.

So, you have hooked up with her friends and she has hooked up with your friends. Sounds like you guys are gonna be just fine.

As long as your buddy doesn't get mad at you!

Post: #7

(03-26-2012 04:11 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

(03-26-2012 04:02 PM)Boomtown Wrote:  I've hooked up with some of her friends, some of whom are obsessed with me.

So, you have hooked up with her friends and she has hooked up with your friends. Sounds like you guys are gonna be just fine.

As long as your buddy doesn't get mad at you!

Yeah, the more I have this story read back to me the more insanely stupid it sounds. Thanks for the input guys.

Post: #8

(03-26-2012 04:09 PM)j r Wrote:  

(03-26-2012 01:41 PM)Boomtown Wrote:  And yes, though I hesitate to call it oneitis as I'm still banging other girls (she knows this), I definitely have it hard for this girl.

Does it matter what you call it? Pickup lingo can be useful in easily referring to certain things, but don't miss the forest for trees. As a general rule, don't fall for girls who haven't already fallen for you. Your feelings should always be a step or so behind hers.

I agree. I think I'm just gonna back off for a while and see what happens. I just don't want to get friend-zoned by this girl and close the door on something happening later. Thanks dude.