Post: #1

So in light of the news about Anthony Bourdain I've heard life, depression, and suicide being debated quite a bit online, I think most recently the Joe Rogan podcast, and it's stirred up some interesting thoughts, would love to hear your guys feedback.

Depression

This isn't my origional more stuff I've heard in from various sources, but in the west we have a very skewed idea of depression. In the west it seems depression is treatd as a chemical imbalance which while it may be true in some cases, is probably not true in most cases.

Depression is often a sign of your needs not being met. If your working long hours you may become depressed because you lack a work life balance and because your not able to be physical and workout, etc. You don't need a pill, you need a better work life balance and need time to get out and excercise and get your bloodpumping. An easy non medical solution would be work less, have time to work out, etc.

Essentially this boils down to instead of taking a pill try to find a way to have your unmet needs met.


Suicide

I've heard people arguing that suicide isn't inherently bad and that in some ways it's selfish to want someone to stick around if they don't have to. Having grown up in the Western World and with a religious background I have a hard time not seeing it being a negative thing, with probably imho the only acceptible instance when somone is terminally ill with no chance of getting better and even then its a tough call.

Curious your thoughts on this.


Anthony Bourdain

Obviously looking from the outside in we have no idea if Anthony Bourdain was depressed or not. We also know having fame, money and living arguably everyone else's dream life is still no gurantee of happiness.

That said I can't help but think for Anthony Bourdain it may have been more of a rational thought if that's possible. First off he's an atheist so any religious/sin component of committing suicide isn't a factor for him. The one thing that throws a wrench in this idea is he had a wife and child who I'm sure he loved and wouldn't want to hurt and for that reason I feel like he probably wasn't in his right mind, if he didn't have a wife and child however he strikes me as a very rational, logical level headed dude and I could totally see him kind of being like I've lived a great life, I've traveled everywhere I wanted to, I accomplished my goals, there's not much here left for me.


Anyhow, following Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain the topic of happiness, depression, death and suicide are being chatted about online and just thought I'd ramble and hear your guys thoughts on the issue.

Post: #2

People have there own private demons they deal with. Depression is real that's why negs works well with dating. People show major vulnerabilities and chinks in there armour, it's just are you going to spot the signals. Bourdain had some serious vices that he tried to get past but yeah the struggle is real.

Post: #3

Regarding depression I agree, it's just a sign that you need a change in your life. Either something you're doing or thinking is inherently wrong and your mind are body are telling you that this life isn't worth living.

Suicide goes one step further. It's when you're convinced that life is horrible and continuing makes little sense.

Been there, but now I've found what makes me happy and I'm aware of the fact that I can be happy nearly all the time. Even if I'm going through a tough time, I know for sure that once I solve the issue, I can go back to being happy all the time and just that thought alone makes me super excited

Post: #4

I have dealt with depression a ton myself. My last lowest low was before I moved out of the NYC and onto Europe.

Some people do great in NYC and I had my extreme highs and lows there but leaving NYC changed my life immensely for the better. Sometimes its just better to nuke your life and start over from scratch. Not to say ive never been depressed in Europe but hitting the reset on everything really gives you hope and a drive to live again.

Life is too short to live in a place or be stuck somewhere and be unhappy.

Ive been unhappy in Germany alot more than usual recently (surprising i know) and I am thinking taking all that knowledge I have now and "hitting that reset button" again and move elsewhere.

Post: #5

He was on Chantix for cigarettes. Known to induce suicide. If you smoke, dont quit with chantix, you'll off yourself sooner.

Post: #6

(06-12-2018 06:29 PM)Stakes Is High Wrote:  He was on Chantix for cigarettes. Known to induce suicide. If you smoke, dont quit with chantix, you'll off yourself sooner.

I've heard Chantix can have some bad side-effects. Better to quit cold turkey or use the gum.

Post: #7

(06-12-2018 06:29 PM)Stakes Is High Wrote:  He was on Chantix for cigarettes. Known to induce suicide. If you smoke, dont quit with chantix, you'll off yourself sooner.

I have a bottle of Chantix still sitting on my drawer from like 5 years ago, got it intending on taking it but after reading side effects have never wanted to take it

Post: #8

He quit cigs over 10 years ago. He was still taking medication for it?

Either way, my biggest takeaway from all this is that having it all doesn't make you immune to your own demons or guarantee happiness. Bourdain was filthy rich, dating a beautiful woman, had many loves in his life, a daughter, traveled the world, sampling the finest and most interesting cuisine from all corners of the globe which he allegedly loved to do, and over all seemed to be living the dream. Still not enough to stop him from taking his own life for whatever reasons that may have been that is still not apparent.

Post: #9

I think there is the deeper question of personal meaning when it comes to the rising suicide rates and drug addiction in the western world.

You have a rise in technology that is replacing workers, who lose their livelihoods to automation, and thus their purpose within an organization. They cannot support their family, and their identity as a provider is challenged. Doctors prescribe medications to sedate this person, so that they feel as if things are fine in a world that is continually crumbling down around them. It's a perfect storm. Couple that with a complete lack of understanding in what it means to be a man, soy consumption, environmental estrogens, and feminism; and I'm surprised suicide rates haven't jumped much higher than 30% since 1999.

Humans are plagued with the constant question of "who am I". Bourdain was clearly not happy with himself and what he was doing. In his early stuff, you could see that he thought it served a purpose of bringing people together and creating bridges across cultures (whatever you may think of this goal, it had a purpose for him). In his later stuff, he was quite clearly self loathing, and unsure what the purpose of it all was. Then, he had the divorce and the girlfriend potentially cheating, plus stuff I'm sure we'll never hear about.

It's a sad predicament, but, for anyone out there that may be contemplating suicide or questioning how meaningless this life may be, keep going. Things always get better if you continue to work towards a better tomorrow, and there are people that love you, however much you may believe the contrary.

Post: #10

Too bad he took chantix...that should be banned! Too many people die from medication side effects but we live in a pill world. SSRIs can cause suidical thoughts as well and should be banned but will never happen...just too much money to be made

Post: #11

(06-12-2018 06:05 PM)kirdiesel Wrote:  Some people do great in NYC and I had my extreme highs and lows there but leaving NYC changed my life immensely for the better. Sometimes its just better to nuke your life and start over from scratch.

Def. I lived in NYC for 2 years and recently moved to the South.
I thought it was completely overrated experience, and I'm from the East Coast...

There's this concept of anomie, where all values and bonds that hold people together break down. NYC is probably the most affected by this of any place in the US. You can sort of see it in people's eyes. NYC is the hamster wheel you can't spin on fast enough, and you don't know where your going. Dating there you can see there's sort of a "seen it all" mentality so it's difficult to make an connection beyond the physical and that can make you feel depressed and hopeless even if you're just about game. Amazing people can feel like nobodies in NYC. Not a good way to live.

Bourdain may be a victim of his own values. He was very blue pilled - more than most men of his stature. Imagine having so much fame and money and landing these super bitter feminist nobodies who cheat on you for no reason. You'd probably feel pretty bad about yourself in that situation. To top it off, his girl was talking about her past career bangs on Twitter (Weinstein). Obviously, this would make most men wretch and feel uncomfortable, he had lost control of the situation and had no out because she'd out him too.

That said, I met Bourdain a few years ago at an event. He was a cool cat despite all of this, and pretty inspirational in his life, and will be missed. Only men genuinely appreciate the accomplishments of other men, women only want to extract from it.

Post: #12

Medication-induced depression and feelings of worthlessness and suicide are very real, often squashed by Big Pharma who always seems to label such side effects as "extremely rare". I have a little bit of a personal experience using Isotretinoin (Accutane) to clear my face when I was a little younger. It didn't take long before I had every single "extremely rare" side-effect and it fundamentally sent me into one of the darkest places I've ever been.

The scariest part of all of it is that in many of these experiences - and mine included - you can't rationally and logically assess that the drug is the reason you've been feeling down. It seems like simple, basic logic that you would be able to figure it out: "Okay, I started feeling like shit right around the same time I started taking these pills" - but I legitimately did not have the capacity to think that way. I simply thought my existence was becoming pointless and lost interest in pretty much everything in life. Total anhedonia... it was a nightmare.

When a friend finally intervened - I finally stopped taking it.
It took months (even longer than the brief period I'd been on it) for me to truly feel like myself again.

I'm convinced a good majority of these pharmaceutical drugs are little more than poison for the mind.

Post: #13

Everyone is going to experience some level of depression at some point of their life I don't care who you are. Life isn't always going to be rosy.

He made poor woman choices and that could've been the issue that ultimately send him over the edge but my guess is he was unhappy with more than just that. I also doubt the Chantix would be the cause of him committing suicide. He was obviously incredibly unhappy if he reached that point.

Rich and fame doesn't equate to happiness. Look at all the celebrities who commit suicide or "accidentally" overdose every year. I personally wouldn't even want to be a celebrity. I want to make real, valued friendships and be able to be unnoticed a lot of the time. I don't want people planting themselves in my life and to not have my privacy. That would drive me bonkers.

I suspect suicide more often then not will involve some form of mental illness. Taking that drastic of step has to be incredibly tough.