Post: #76

Personally, meditation played a huge role in killing social anxiety and depression for me (as well as obviously doing things to get over those things like actually talking to chicks instead of being anxious). I usually meditate for 20 minutes in the morning. If I don't, I feel kind of antsy and on edge. In that sense, it is like a drug but better I would say than popping some pill (meditation apparently rewires your brain for the better even)

The whole spirituality woo-woo bullshit IMO is a commercial scam aimed towards people wanting an escape or answers just like the "4 hour workweek" travel lifestyle, self-help/Tony Robbins, PUA/Red Pill (I actually found out about meditation via RSD - probably one of the only useful things I got from there), etc but I think the act of meditating is actually useful.

Like other people, I used to think I had to be all serious about it and be good at it. I guess this would be true if you are trying to be Buddha 2.0 but that isn't exactly what I'm trying to do here. Though I did have some interesting experiences where I was able to truly clear my head for an extended period of time (like out-of-body experiences and smiling for like 2 hours straight because I felt like I had just popped some molly), now I just sit down wherever with upright posture and try to clear my head as much as possible for 20 minutes. Most of the time, my thoughts will veer and I might find myself daydreaming about some chick but try to rein it in asap. After I am done, I am noticeably more relaxed, clear-headed, and even feel a slight euphoria sometimes for a few minutes.

Sometimes I'll also meditate after doing a lot of work or reading and my brain feels fried and it will be like pressing a reset button and my brain will feel fresh and ready to do more (though with diminishing returns)

Would definitely recommend

Post: #77

I average a meditation session about once every 3 days. If you're under a lot of challenge or stress (especially when you're pressing yourself in a self-improvement way) it can help to bring your mind back to peace for consolidation purposes.

Post: #78

(05-05-2016 06:23 PM)Chowder Head Wrote:  I have a friend that meditates on things he wants like money, good health, etc. It seems to work for him. Is that a good way to meditate? I thought having a clear mind was the best way. I guess what he is doing is more visualization not meditating.

That is fantasizing. Nothing wrong with it, but it is kind of the opposite of meditation in the common use of the term.

Post: #79

Recently did this guided meditation by Aubrey Marcus (Onnit Academy guy) - thought it was pretty profound and would recommend it.

After doing meditation on and off for a few years by myself, it was pretty helpful to listen to a guide.

https://www.aubreymarcus.com/meditation/

Post: #80

I also started meditating and I enjoy it now. I used to think of it as a chore but now I love it. Every time I do it it's like a challenge for me to overcome the mild strain on my spine, the cramping on my legs by doing burst breathing (which reduces the sensation of pain).

Not to mention the itchiness. I used to hate that as well but now I see it as a challenge as well. Sometimes when I don't meditate and I feel the urge to scratch my itch I let the sensation linger on just to see what happens next.

Post: #81

I’ve recently started using the Buddhify meditation app and thought it worth briefly sharing my thoughts.
It’s set up so you can choose a guided meditation depending on your situation and how you’re feeling (e.g. they have some sessions for if you’re having trouble sleeping, others for if you’re feeling anxious/stressed etc).

As a point of reference, I also used the Headspace app for about a year; I actually prefer Buddhify. Headspace sessions are arranged in a similar way to Buddhify (e.g. they have sessions for anxiety, other sessions for depression etc), but the Headspace content in each session can feel very similar, regardless of the theme/focus. Buddhify also uses different speakers for the meditations, whereas Headspace has the same guy’s voice every time, so if you don’t like his voice, you’re screwed. Headspace has fixed durations you can choose from for each package of sessions (10/15/20 minutes etc), whereas Buddhify has a fixed duration for each individual session which can’t be changed.

Notably, Buddhify is a lot cheaper : it has a very small one off fee (about 2GBP for Android), whereas Headspace charges a monthly rate of about 10GBP.
There may also be free meditation apps out there, and of course you don’t necessarily need guided meditation, though I think this format is especially useful when beginning and I still find it useful sometimes if I don’t want to think about how to structure my session: I just press play.

Speaking generally about meditation, and similar to lot of posters in this thread, meditation has made a positive difference to my life and I’d recommend it strongly (it can be tricky to get into it initially, so would suggest sticking with it daily for at least a week if you want to try it).

I may be doing a meditation retreat this summer, will report back in this thread if I do it.

Post: #82

I have been meditating for almost 8 years now, nothing too intense. Maybe 10-15 minutes every other day... Some periods every day, some months no sessions at all.

Would I recommend it: yes.
Are the results spectacular: not really... For me the "results" are very subtle. Slightly more calm and happier, better awareness during the day of my thoughts... Actually one of the goals of meditation is to become less result-oriented... Long term it supposedly has health benefits and it can help restructure your brain, so I hope that's also happening.

I will have more time during the next year, so I will probably spend more time on it daily. Probably also do a retreat and might take some classes...

Post: #83

Just about to go on retreat. Definitely made a big difference in my life, dare I say a good teacher can make all the difference for giving you a taste of what it's all about. There's a reason for various lineages etc, certainly something to look into if you're serious about clearing the dirt.

Post: #84

I've tried sitting meditations at home, I've done group meditations at the Shambhala Center in town, and I've found times of significant mental quiet while engrossed in projects (waxing the car, woodworking projects) or while outdoors in nature hiking or biking or just walking along the river.

The group meditations were difficult, other people moving and coughing would distract me. They also did part of the session as a walking meditation which I found completely useless, you had to time your steps so you weren't falling behind or pushing up on the person in front of you, it was especially difficult if it was a crowded session.

I recently had a profound experience doing a simple yoga class at my gym, it was a slow deep stretching type of yoga and I'm fit enough that it turned into a fairly deep meditative state and made my body and mind feel incredible. I credit it with having a powerful day of high quality social interactions including a few approaches.

Post: #85

For anyone of a pagan religious bent, this has helped during my meditations

Post: #86

Is it possible to remember situations from your childhood/youth through meditation?

Sort of like when someone mentions a certain event or you hear some music, suddenly it comes rushing back and you remember words, sights, smells, feelings, but you don't normally.

I'd like to try to do this kind of "lucid remembering" on purpose, is it possible?

Post: #87

I used to meditate. Helped clear the mind, get centered type of stuff. It didn't help with my anxiety and the emotional roller coaster which I attributed to a vitamin D deficiency.

Then I started lifting heavy and all of the benefits I got from meditating came to me 100x harder and lasted a lot longer. My anxieties and other mental issues became far more manageable.

Unless there's some sort of physical component like power yoga, meditating doesn't really help me like it used to. To each their own.

Post: #88

I was watching a video about meditation, and may have "figured out" a part of my own psychology- maybe the big thing making me miserable in particular/more than other people is constant overthinking/they call it the default mode network(DMN).

So I've noticed that the main things that make me feel "good" are shit like. Video chatting with my really good friends who live overseas. Hanging out with friends in real life, although I can only do that every so often because I get way too bored with a lot of Kiwis. Achieving things, a lot of which are not all that valuable by themselves. Those make me feel good in large part because they tap into flow which is the opposite of the DMN, and silences the chatter in my head. Trying things and failing made me feel really bad because I constantly overthink/let the "voice in my head" keep talking about the failures. I've actually done a lot of inner game/ego check work so I've learned not to associate my performance with my self worth, but despite that failures still seem to feel really bad(irrationally so).

Anyways the big revelation is if I can tap into flow and block the overthinking I can probably feel a heck of a lot better than I do now. I feel amazing as is due to previously having done CBT to kill depression and resentment but I have waves of brilliance and relative misery(that I now observe- the brilliance was because I had relative flow, and the misery was due to the overthinking). It also explains why boredom is so brutal for me- the DMN voice is in overdrive, that's why I feel compelled to do a bunch of things to kill boredom. I would do a bunch of things like constantly checking my youtube subscription feed, reading RVF/other blogs, play a computer game, do a bunch of mini-workouts mainly because if I didn't I felt I would go insane from the boredom.

If meditation works it would fix a bunch of the most critical problems affecting me right now-

-no longer feeling horrible @ failing
-no longer being miserable in a minority but significant # of situations
-being able to prioritise activities/achievements that are actually important- not just merely those that I abuse to bring flow/block DMN
-ability to handle boredom, which is super inevitable in NZ
-ability to calm right the fuck down in an approach situation instead of having strong anxiety

It might also fix another weird thing about me. Right now I think really fast. And so I have to talk fast as well to align the speed of my talking to the speed of my thoughts. I've tried to slow my talking down but it would always be really screwed up that I would let my train of thought get too far ahead and I would be too confused. But if I can properly calm down then I can actually think a bit slower too.

Another uncomfortable fact is that I've conditioned myself to associate this chatter with "me". So it feels a bit scary to silence it, even though it seems convincing that that makes the most sense to improve my quality of life.

Post: #89

Hey guys, just bumping this thread since I attended a meditation retreat and posted my experience in the retreat thread. This one seems to get much more traffic, so I'm posting the link here.

/thread-3415-...pid1677869

Post: #90

No one can answer my question about meditating for "lucid remembering"?

Post: #91

(05-18-2017 02:17 PM)Dvorak Wrote:  I have been meditating for almost 8 years now, nothing too intense. Maybe 10-15 minutes every other day... Some periods every day, some months no sessions at all.

Would I recommend it: yes.
Are the results spectacular: not really... For me the "results" are very subtle. Slightly more calm and happier, better awareness during the day of my thoughts... Actually one of the goals of meditation is to become less result-oriented... Long term it supposedly has health benefits and it can help restructure your brain, so I hope that's also happening.

I will have more time during the next year, so I will probably spend more time on it daily. Probably also do a retreat and might take some classes...

This is my experience too. Noticable slight benefit.

All the journalism around it is IMO somewhat overhyped. These guys jump on anything spiritual, sexy or faddish and completely ignore effect size.. Any time you read an article mentioning "significant increase" or "significant difference", be skeptical - it tells you nothing about the size of the difference in the source study, only that there likely was one.

Cardio exercise still beats almost everything else in terms of effect size for depression, mood and brain function(memory, cognition). Meditation and yoga do seem useful for stress reduction though.

Post: #92

A basic prerequisite for meditation is silencing the mind.
Below are some tips to do it.

Difficulties in meditation associated with invasion of various thoughts are caused not by wrong forces but by the usual nature of the human mind. All the sadhaks encounter such a difficulty, and many are facing it for a long time. There are several ways to overcome it.
1. One of them is to look at thoughts, observing the nature of the human mind they demonstrate, but not giving them any support until they fade and stop by themselves – this method was recommended by Vivekananda in his book “Raja Yoga.”
2. Another way is to look at thoughts not as your own, distancing oneself from them as an observer Purusha and refusing to support them – the thoughts are viewed as something coming from outside, from Prakriti, and they should be perceived as random passers-by crossing the mind’s space, you have nothing to do with and you are not interested in. And after some time, the mind is usually divided into two parts – a mental witness, completely calm and nonchalant onlooker, and an observed part, which is crossed by thoughts or where thoughts roam. Later on, one can establish silence or stillness also in this part of the mind.
3. There is also a third, active method, when you try to see where the thoughts are coming from, and you find out that they come not from the person himself but, as it were, come into his head from outside; noting the appearance of the thoughts, they should be discarded at once before they come in. It seems to be the hardest method, and not everyone can use it, but it is the shortest way to silence.

Post: #93

(11-06-2017 05:02 PM)nomadbrah Wrote:  No one can answer my question about meditating for "lucid remembering"?

In my experience yes. During my recent retreat, I remembered several long forgotten memories by the 3rd and 4th day. I was meditating for about 10 hours per day.

My suggestion is find a place as quiet as possible, if you can get something close to a sensory deprivation chamber that's the best. Focus your mind as much as possible.

Then don't try to force the memories, just go back in time in your mind. Memory mostly works by association and location, maybe begin with an elementary school memory and go back.

I wasn't able to choose the memories and dates that were recalled, in the sense I couldn't say "It's January 3rd, 1992 where was I?", but I remembered events as early as age 3. The reason I know my exact age during this particular memory was that it was related to a Hurricane that hit when I was 3 years old.

I was overwhelmingly surprised by how much I could remember and how clear and vivid the memories were.

Post: #94

I've been getting into float tanks. Fucking love it.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling

Post: #95

Sensory deprivation tanks? What did you experience?

Post: #96

Apparently there's a good site/app about meditation. I've tried one day of the sample audio and it seems decently good so far. https://www.headspace.com/

Post: #97

I've also done float tanks and think they are a great experience.

There's a good video from Joe Rogan where he talks about them.

I chose to float for a few reasons. Body recovery was one. It is very relaxing especially if you're into sports that are hard on the body.

The second was to see if I could get some answers to some life questions.

The first time I went in I had a clear question in my head about my current career path.

It's difficult to explain, but I got the answer with a clear visual in there.

Post: #98

(11-05-2017 01:51 PM)The Catalyst Wrote:  I was watching a video about meditation, and may have "figured out" a part of my own psychology- maybe the big thing making me miserable in particular/more than other people is constant overthinking/they call it the default mode network(DMN).

So I've noticed that the main things that make me feel "good" are shit like. Video chatting with my really good friends who live overseas. Hanging out with friends in real life, although I can only do that every so often because I get way too bored with a lot of Kiwis. Achieving things, a lot of which are not all that valuable by themselves. Those make me feel good in large part because they tap into flow which is the opposite of the DMN, and silences the chatter in my head. Trying things and failing made me feel really bad because I constantly overthink/let the "voice in my head" keep talking about the failures. I've actually done a lot of inner game/ego check work so I've learned not to associate my performance with my self worth, but despite that failures still seem to feel really bad(irrationally so).

Anyways the big revelation is if I can tap into flow and block the overthinking I can probably feel a heck of a lot better than I do now. I feel amazing as is due to previously having done CBT to kill depression and resentment but I have waves of brilliance and relative misery(that I now observe- the brilliance was because I had relative flow, and the misery was due to the overthinking). It also explains why boredom is so brutal for me- the DMN voice is in overdrive, that's why I feel compelled to do a bunch of things to kill boredom. I would do a bunch of things like constantly checking my youtube subscription feed, reading RVF/other blogs, play a computer game, do a bunch of mini-workouts mainly because if I didn't I felt I would go insane from the boredom.

If meditation works it would fix a bunch of the most critical problems affecting me right now-

-no longer feeling horrible @ failing
-no longer being miserable in a minority but significant # of situations
-being able to prioritise activities/achievements that are actually important- not just merely those that I abuse to bring flow/block DMN
-ability to handle boredom, which is super inevitable in NZ
-ability to calm right the fuck down in an approach situation instead of having strong anxiety

It might also fix another weird thing about me. Right now I think really fast. And so I have to talk fast as well to align the speed of my talking to the speed of my thoughts. I've tried to slow my talking down but it would always be really screwed up that I would let my train of thought get too far ahead and I would be too confused. But if I can properly calm down then I can actually think a bit slower too.

Another uncomfortable fact is that I've conditioned myself to associate this chatter with "me". So it feels a bit scary to silence it, even though it seems convincing that that makes the most sense to improve my quality of life.

This sounds exactly like me, particularly in the more challenging stages of my life. Looking back on a lot of phases of life they were better than I experienced them at the time, really wish I could have turned off the mind-chatter and anxiety.

I've had huge problems beating myself up about failure, even things that I ultimately had no control over (insane girls, silly work politics).

Also have the boredom-anxiety thing, I think part of my lifelong sleep problems has been always trying to stay stimulated.

Post: #99

(12-17-2017 04:31 AM)BadgerHut Wrote:  

(11-05-2017 01:51 PM)The Catalyst Wrote:  If meditation works it would fix a bunch of the most critical problems affecting me right now-

-no longer feeling horrible @ failing
-no longer being miserable in a minority but significant # of situations
-being able to prioritise activities/achievements that are actually important- not just merely those that I abuse to bring flow/block DMN
-ability to handle boredom, which is super inevitable in NZ
-ability to calm right the fuck down in an approach situation instead of having strong anxiety

It might also fix another weird thing about me. Right now I think really fast. And so I have to talk fast as well to align the speed of my talking to the speed of my thoughts. I've tried to slow my talking down but it would always be really screwed up that I would let my train of thought get too far ahead and I would be too confused. But if I can properly calm down then I can actually think a bit slower too.

This sounds exactly like me, particularly in the more challenging stages of my life. Looking back on a lot of phases of life they were better than I experienced them at the time, really wish I could have turned off the mind-chatter and anxiety.

I've had huge problems beating myself up about failure, even things that I ultimately had no control over (insane girls, silly work politics).

Also have the boredom-anxiety thing, I think part of my lifelong sleep problems has been always trying to stay stimulated.

I figured since you quoted me and this was a month ago I'd update people on what's been happening.

From the time of the post I meditated once a day for about 2 weeks or so. Since then I meditate maybe once a week on/off approximately. The effects have been lasting and noticable however they aren't game changing in the same way diet/exercise/CBT/light therapy/magnesium is but I'm really glad I did it.

I don't really feel horrible in the same way about failing. I've always read about not taking it personally or not letting your ego take the hit- but only now after meditating I've taken it to heart. However, failure feels the sting simply because of the psychological bad-feels of wasted effort/what could've been. This is much, much less(maybe 5%?) of what it used to be when I felt the hit to my ego- but maybe in time even this would pass.

I'm no longer miserable in any situation unless I've worked really hard and "crashed" and many things come together to make me feel bad(relapsing on porn, getting rejected by a bunch of girls, not sleeping well). However, I generally feel a lot better during summer(which it is now in the Southern Hemisphere) and most of my misery is during winter so I can't say I conclusively don't feel misery anymore.

I've increasingly been able to prioritise stuff that I genuinely value, like gymnastics and daygame and getting other miscellaneous stuff sorted. And been able to downplay stuff I do that I only do to kill boredom. I still do those things but I've felt a markedly less feeling of dependency on them.

I can handle boredom much more, however I still despise NZ somewhat due to the fact that it's so boring when it could so easily not be.

Oh and I pretty much have no approach anxiety anymore. It's become much more muted, so maybe 5% of what it used to be. Basically it's now just minor nerves, while it used to be crippling overthinking/constant buzz in my head that I would get all worked up about. So basically that's really good because I've learned a bunch of game and now I'm excited that I finally was able to grind out a bunch of sets without feeling anxious/drained. Also that I can actually do it rather than wuss out due to anxiety.

Edit: I can also to a certain extent think slower on command- however I still think faster than most people generally, just that super ridiculous fast thinking is gone.

Post: #100

@The Catalyst, thanks for the details...sounds very similar to me.

"I don't really feel horrible in the same way about failing. I've always read about not taking it personally or not letting your ego take the hit- but only now after meditating I've taken it to heart. However, failure feels the sting simply because of the psychological bad-feels of wasted effort/what could've been. This is much, much less(maybe 5%?) of what it used to be when I felt the hit to my ego- but maybe in time even this would pass."

I've realized I have major issues with regret and disappointment like this...I think it might be the root of my feeling bad about failure, thinking that I've wasted my time, moreso than the in-the-moment pain of losing.

"been able to downplay stuff I do that I only do to kill boredom. I still do those things but I've felt a markedly less feeling of dependency on them."

I find a lot of the solution to these things is simply recognizing them happening. Really getting square on recognizing when I'm doing time-wasting things to kill boredom has really helped, even though I don't do them much less, I keep a "bullshit budget" in my head where I know if I'm doing more than e.g. 5 minutes of social media I'm just trying to stimulate myself mindlessly so I know to knock it off.

"So basically that's really good because I've learned a bunch of game and now I'm excited that I finally was able to grind out a bunch of sets without feeling anxious/drained. Also that I can actually do it rather than wuss out due to anxiety."

Do you find your anxiety is lower because you feel you have some kind of plan for success? A big reason I was shit at game when I was young was I didn't have a framework I at all understood so the whole thing felt totally random. I also find myself not wanting to participate in things I'm not good at, so I shied away from escalating etc. I got a lot better and more motivated when I had some basic ideas in my head to validate that girls would actually enjoy my company.

Actually a lot of this I came to understand in the last ~2 years in a now-over fairly toxic relationship with a woman with a lot of depression and energy issues. Somehow she was OK with me showing weakness and talking these things out with her which helped me realize some toxic patterns. I should whip up a post on that sometime, it might help other guys.