Post: #176

(07-23-2016 02:27 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(07-23-2016 11:33 AM)TonySandos Wrote:  The initial post Juanjay

I think that a lot of guys are in agreement that the OP is filled with a lot of really good dance related information, and it is a very well put together with a lot of angles. That is likely why OP has a lot of "likes", but are you attempting to say anything beyond the fact that you like the OP from June 2011?

In other words, maybe we should start over with what it is that you are wanting to say?

At first, I thought that you were talking about how employing dance techniques on chicks can be helpful in escalating with those chicks in various ways off the dance floor, then, second, I thought that you were trying to suggest that employing dance techniques could be good for setting interaction dynamics within long term relationships, and now, third, I have no idea what you are saying beyond the fact that you "like" op. Can you elaborate in some way to point out what it is you are saying and maybe how it applies to you specifically rather than some quasi-abstract theories?

Yes, it's really that simple.

OP proves that pulling women that are strangers is effective through dancing alone. The conversation is minimal.
I saw opportunities where you could possibly utilize this technique after you master it to swoon second dates (who you've met by other means such as tinder or daytime) and know very little of.
Third; if you have a long term girlfriend, you can fabricate the preselection element by going out and "innocently" dancing with other girls or simply having her see other girls swoon over you. The jealousy will be there and that works favorably if it can be executed correctly.


That may come off as a stretch to you, but I'm privy to pulling off ballsy moves and I'm not the only one to think so. check here

Post: #177

(07-23-2016 03:33 PM)TonySandos Wrote:  

(07-23-2016 02:27 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(07-23-2016 11:33 AM)TonySandos Wrote:  The initial post Juanjay

I think that a lot of guys are in agreement that the OP is filled with a lot of really good dance related information, and it is a very well put together with a lot of angles. That is likely why OP has a lot of "likes", but are you attempting to say anything beyond the fact that you like the OP from June 2011?

In other words, maybe we should start over with what it is that you are wanting to say?

At first, I thought that you were talking about how employing dance techniques on chicks can be helpful in escalating with those chicks in various ways off the dance floor, then, second, I thought that you were trying to suggest that employing dance techniques could be good for setting interaction dynamics within long term relationships, and now, third, I have no idea what you are saying beyond the fact that you "like" op. Can you elaborate in some way to point out what it is you are saying and maybe how it applies to you specifically rather than some quasi-abstract theories?

Yes, it's really that simple.

OP proves that pulling women that are strangers is effective through dancing alone. The conversation is minimal.

Well, there are a lot of examples of guys using dance in a lot of different ways, and OP presents dance in terms of his own experiences.

I think that part of the benefit of forums like this is to discuss our own experiences with guys directly, and there are two issues with OP in that regard, OP was posted in June 2011, and therefore his experiences predated the materials in the post. Surely, author of OP has chimed into the thread since June 2011, but as I already pointed out the latest was in late 2013.

Accordingly, if we want to continue to talk about various aspects of OP, then it seems that we are going to need to describe some of our own experiences, no? not just theory or history, right?

(07-23-2016 03:33 PM)TonySandos Wrote:  I saw opportunities where you could possibly utilize this technique after you master it to swoon second dates (who you've met by other means such as tinder or daytime) and know very little of.

Are these experiences that you saw yourself in person, ideas in your head about what is theoretically possible, or are you continuing to talk about theoretically extrapolating the experiences that were described within OP to new hypothetical circumstances?

Of course, theoretically, a lot of things are possible, but unless we are talking about some concrete examples of how some of us guys have attempted to carry out the theories, then why does it really matter about what is theoretically possible?

(07-23-2016 03:33 PM)TonySandos Wrote:  Third; if you have a long term girlfriend, you can fabricate the preselection element by going out and "innocently" dancing with other girls or simply having her see other girls swoon over you. The jealousy will be there and that works favorably if it can be executed correctly.

Yes, it could play out in a variety of ways with long term girlfriends or medium term girl friends. I have had quite a few dance experiences in which I bring girlfriends to dance locations, and it plays out in a variety of ways depending on the environment, the girl and how you (the guy) may chose to employ different strategies including discussing the matter with the chick before, during or after the event. It is only going to play out in the one way that you describe, if it doesn't end up playing out in another way, so that is not telling us too much about how the situation is going to play out, is it?

Why don't you describe your own experiences regarding long term (or even medium term) relationships and dance? Do you have any? Have you attempted to employ any of this?

(07-23-2016 03:33 PM)TonySandos Wrote:  That may come off as a stretch to you, but I'm privy to pulling off ballsy moves and I'm not the only one to think so. check here

Citing yourself as known to be "ballsy" in other situations does not really help in terms of this particular thread and your discussion of this particular topic. And really, the whole concept of ballsy is also quite abstract when we are not referring to specifics, so some thoughts could be considered really ballsy, but they do not really mean anything if you have not actually employed the thoughts to some kind of real world application, do they?

Post: #178

I read this about two months ago and I have to say it really motivated me to get out there and start dancing, now I have way more fun when I go out and my friends have taken notice to that along with fair amount of women. All I did was watch a few tutorials on YouTube and practice at my house, then I took my skills out to the bars and clubs and so far I hear good things about how I dance.

Thanks again for posting this, It really has gotten me out of my shell.

Post: #179

(09-17-2016 01:23 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  I read this about two months ago and I have to say it really motivated me to get out there and start dancing, now I have way more fun when I go out and my friends have taken notice to that along with fair amount of women. All I did was watch a few tutorials on YouTube and practice at my house, then I took my skills out to the bars and clubs and so far I hear good things about how I dance.

Thanks again for posting this, It really has gotten me out of my shell.

On average, how often do you go out a week?

Do you physically practice (like at home) some of the moves that you do on the dance floor, or do you just experiment while on the dance floor?

I have found that once you have a core set of moves, and you can kind of inspire confidence from the girl (her thinking that you know what you are doing), then you can kind of experiment on the floor. Of course, when you just meet a girl, it would likely be best to employ the moves that you know better, and then if she keeps dancing with you, then you may chose to experiment with newer moves (or moves that you are still working on).

Actually, one more point... Even when you know moves fairly well, you can become somewhat rusty, stiff and not smooth if you do not practice from time to time, so even if you are in a stage of life in which you are not dancing very much, it would be a decent practice to force yourself to go out at least once a month, merely for maintenance of the dance moves that you already know.

Post: #180

(09-17-2016 07:05 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(09-17-2016 01:23 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  I read this about two months ago and I have to say it really motivated me to get out there and start dancing, now I have way more fun when I go out and my friends have taken notice to that along with fair amount of women. All I did was watch a few tutorials on YouTube and practice at my house, then I took my skills out to the bars and clubs and so far I hear good things about how I dance.

Thanks again for posting this, It really has gotten me out of my shell.

On average, how often do you go out a week?

Do you physically practice (like at home) some of the moves that you do on the dance floor, or do you just experiment while on the dance floor?

I have found that once you have a core set of moves, and you can kind of inspire confidence from the girl (her thinking that you know what you are doing), then you can kind of experiment on the floor. Of course, when you just meet a girl, it would likely be best to employ the moves that you know better, and then if she keeps dancing with you, then you may chose to experiment with newer moves (or moves that you are still working on).

Actually, one more point... Even when you know moves fairly well, you can become somewhat rusty, stiff and not smooth if you do not practice from time to time, so even if you are in a stage of life in which you are not dancing very much, it would be a decent practice to force yourself to go out at least once a month, merely for maintenance of the dance moves that you already know.

I go out every two weeks on average, I practice at home as well as on the dance floor. I like to watch the more experienced dancers and try to pick up on what they're doing, I even ask them to teach me the steps to certain dances and they never seem reluctant to do so.

Yes! That's how I've been doing it! I like to keep it simple til I get warmed up then I experiment a good bit with or without a partner. The last few places I went to were bars with dance floors, the crowd was very thin and the women were not very open to dancing, if they did come out and dance they weren't very good (maybe that's just me) they just seem that "fun" but at the same time I also learned that being a good lead is very important. Like I said I've only been doing this for about two months so there is more learning to be done.

To your last point, I whole heartedly agree that's why I try to practice so much. I feel that it's a great way to show that you're a fun guy and that you don't mind being in the spot light.

Post: #181

Strokes351w

You'll find that most women can't dance well unless you hit a Latin or black club. Even then not all the women can dance well. You're goal as a dancer is to make the girl FEEL like a better dancer than she really is.

She may not be clued in on how to dance to differing songs so you have to lead, control and dominate to get her on track then let her loose, go crazy and have fun all within your lead.

Isolating them is easy. Say "It's hot. Let's go outside for a minute."

Post: #182

I'll keep the Latin and black clubs on my radar then, I'm not picky as to where I go dancing. I experienced a little bit of that last weekend, I slowed it down to her pace and she seemed to pick up on my moves after a few songs.

I basically have the same moves for every genre so I shouldn't be hard to follow (even though I go a little too fast sometimes).
I'm taking that line down in the mental notes.

Post: #183

(09-18-2016 01:00 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  

(09-17-2016 07:05 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(09-17-2016 01:23 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  I read this about two months ago and I have to say it really motivated me to get out there and start dancing, now I have way more fun when I go out and my friends have taken notice to that along with fair amount of women. All I did was watch a few tutorials on YouTube and practice at my house, then I took my skills out to the bars and clubs and so far I hear good things about how I dance.

Thanks again for posting this, It really has gotten me out of my shell.

On average, how often do you go out a week?

Do you physically practice (like at home) some of the moves that you do on the dance floor, or do you just experiment while on the dance floor?

I have found that once you have a core set of moves, and you can kind of inspire confidence from the girl (her thinking that you know what you are doing), then you can kind of experiment on the floor. Of course, when you just meet a girl, it would likely be best to employ the moves that you know better, and then if she keeps dancing with you, then you may chose to experiment with newer moves (or moves that you are still working on).

Actually, one more point... Even when you know moves fairly well, you can become somewhat rusty, stiff and not smooth if you do not practice from time to time, so even if you are in a stage of life in which you are not dancing very much, it would be a decent practice to force yourself to go out at least once a month, merely for maintenance of the dance moves that you already know.

I go out every two weeks on average, I practice at home as well as on the dance floor. I like to watch the more experienced dancers and try to pick up on what they're doing, I even ask them to teach me the steps to certain dances and they never seem reluctant to do so.

Each person is going to learn in a different way, and likely I would learn (or attempt to learn) now in a bit of a different way as compared to the way that I attempted to learn when I was began to learn dance.

Sure, the object of this thread seems more about discussing ways to use dance/music to get laid, rather than learning the technical skills for dance for the sake of dance, so in the end, if whatever you are doing, such as getting out there, puts you in a position to open the girl, escalate and then to continue the interaction, then you are likely in a better place, using dance.

Personally, I find it a bit difficult to learn how to do something from mere watching, but yeah, if you later attempt to put it into practice and then repeat over and over , that could be a decent way to add moves.

You likely have to measure for yourself how high on the technicals you want to go, and whether you are getting enough from your learning method. When I began to learn salsa, I became quite obsessed with it, and I considered that the actual dance has so many technical wonders, and for the first few years, I spent several days a week going to classes and clubs that had classes and in the meantime meeting people (guys and girls). I engaged in a kind of emersion and also wrote down my moves in a kind of short-hand in order that I would be able to attempt to perform them on the dance floor when I went dancing... so I would create various visualizations the moves and walk through the moves, but these visualizations did not become very concrete until I repeatedly attempted to apply them.

These days, I kind of learn by making things up that are variations of moves that I already do, but learning style becomes different after you have a pretty large repertoire of social dancing basic moves that you can employ on the dance floor in order to keep the chick entertained while you may be considering whether to experiment with this particular chick or not ( in terms of working on dance moves). Sometimes the moves will not really sink in until you perform them with a partner a few times, and then after you begin to get better at the move(s), then you may even change it around or experiment with the way you are doing the move in order to create variations of your own move (making the move your own rather than someone else's move).

(09-18-2016 01:00 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  Yes! That's how I've been doing it! I like to keep it simple til I get warmed up then I experiment a good bit with or without a partner. The last few places I went to were bars with dance floors, the crowd was very thin and the women were not very open to dancing, if they did come out and dance they weren't very good (maybe that's just me) they just seem that "fun" but at the same time I also learned that being a good lead is very important.

Sure, sometimes you are going to need to tailor your approach to the atmosphere of that bar on that night.. and sometimes your dancing could become contagious in getting the place going, and sometimes, the crowd is not going to be very good and even the ratios of men to women may be bad or the kind of women in the joint may be lacking in terms of suitable targets, whether it is for practice or chicks that you may want to take further.

(09-18-2016 01:00 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  Like I said I've only been doing this for about two months so there is more learning to be done.

Two months seems a blip in the dance space, especially if you are going only a couple of times a month. I personally feel that in the learning phase there may be some need to play the scene more in order to learn, but then again, it seems that you may also be doing some of the learning behind the scene in order to work on moves... which is similar to what i did in the beginning. Actually, frequently I was working around 5 days a week, and I would go dancing 3-5 days a week. Sometimes, I would go to various nightclubs just to check them out (especially if there was a class). I would attend the class, and then sometimes I would just leave immediately after the class, if I was not having any luck finding dance partners at my level.. I would figure that I needed sleep. Actually, sometimes I would work from 8am to 5pm, go home and take a nap, then go to the club from 9pm to 12pm, or sometimes my attendance at the club would be a lot shorter, especially thinking that I have to work the next day.

(09-18-2016 01:00 AM)Stroked351w Wrote:  To your last point, I whole heartedly agree that's why I try to practice so much. I feel that it's a great way to show that you're a fun guy and that you don't mind being in the spot light.

Sure, there are different kinds of fun. Sometimes, when some kinds of learning is really technical, it can take quite a while to get the move to a point that is smooth and works. Also, dancing tends to be a social interaction, and sometimes, certain interactions can catch you at a bad time and kind of ruin the mood and momentum, especially if you are juggling several things in life, and sometimes, maybe it may not be a good time to dance because you have too many other things going on that need to be attended... so in that regard, sometimes, I would be at a club or a dance event, and I would realize that I really need to cut the event short and to save my learning for a more appropriate time because maybe I was not having fun, either, which is part of the point, too.

Post: #184

(09-18-2016 07:22 AM)realologist Wrote:  Strokes351w

You'll find that most women can't dance well unless you hit a Latin or black club. Even then not all the women can dance well. You're goal as a dancer is to make the girl FEEL like a better dancer than she really is.

She may not be clued in on how to dance to differing songs so you have to lead, control and dominate to get her on track then let her loose, go crazy and have fun all within your lead.

Isolating them is easy. Say "It's hot. Let's go outside for a minute."

Actually, guys have varying focuses, but I tend to focus either on girls who are beginners or ones that are very willing to follow. Sometimes girls who dance a lot, may become a bit difficult to deal with (especially if you are more of a beginner dancer) because they may not be wowed by your dance moves, they may be used to dance styles that are different from yours and accordingly they may not be willing to follow.

I think that a lot of guys do tend to figure out how to dance with more beginner and at least less advanced girls because they tend to be easier to wow.

Post: #185

(09-18-2016 11:39 PM)Stroked351w Wrote:  I'll keep the Latin and black clubs on my radar then, I'm not picky as to where I go dancing. I experienced a little bit of that last weekend, I slowed it down to her pace and she seemed to pick up on my moves after a few songs.

I basically have the same moves for every genre so I shouldn't be hard to follow (even though I go a little too fast sometimes).
I'm taking that line down in the mental notes.

Sometimes, you can just focus on a few things at a time.. whether it is connection or certain dance moves, and if for you, you notice that you are sometimes going to fast, then that can be a decent focus. It also can become a lot easier to slow down once you have learned a lot of moves and you have employed them a lot because you will be keeping track of the beat in your head while you do the move and when you may stop or attempt to do the move and you realize that it should be done at a certain point, you may rush through and then the pause of the move being done will come at the wrong point.

I am a real stickler for the beat, and I dance on certain beats. So my style is kind of regular, and some girls are more drawn to my style, and some other girls are used to dancing to other styles (which is fine with me, but sometimes it is not clear until after trying to dance with the girl to see whether she is comfortable or not).

When I was a beginner, the girl would frequently get me off of the beat, but with practice it becomes easier and easier to control what beat you are dancing on and a lot more difficult for the girl to get you off of the beat, even if she either is not following very well or she does not seem to be trying to follow very well.

Post: #186

Going off what JayJuanGee said. Sometimes you don't have to learn a lot of new moves. Getting more control can allow you to adjust the speed you perform moves, the length you perform them for, the order you do them, etc. A mastery on those on the same moves can make you a better dancer because you can adjust and use those moves in many different ways.

I suggest you go out and practice more. There will be a point where you don't have to think about and listen the beat. Almost like a 6 sense where you can feel it. It makes dancing that much easier because you can focus on the other aspects of dancing.

Post: #187

Solid advice gentlemen, I do appreciate it! We'll see how It goes this weekend when I go out, I've been putting in some work this week so I'm ready to let loose.

Post: #188

How do you guys dance in a packed dancefloor where there is no space at all. It seems you can only move in the same spot, so all that fancy dips and push/pull moves become very difficult to execute. In addition to the 'duff..duff' generic house beat that does nothing to increase attraction?

Is there some simple dance moves that can be done with such constraints? From what I see, most guys just bring her to the dance floor, hold her waist, shuffle a bit and go for the kiss. This is fine if you know her before hitting the venue but what if you just met her?

Post: #189

^Create space with your dance moves. If you can't do that, if it's so packed that you literally can't move...find a spot in the club that is less crowded.

Of all the dance clubs that I have ever been to, I have never been in a situation where I could not do some solo moves and get attention. Granted, I'm tall, but the idea of a completely packed club from the entrance to the DJ booth is a little extreme....

As for moves, try a move that matches both the energy of the crowd and the mood of the music. People will take notice.

If you are tall, raising your hands to the ceiling draws attention because your hand will be above people's heads.

Also, stand with your feet shoulder with apart. Puff your chest out a little bit. People will give you space.

Post: #190

(11-19-2017 04:47 AM)BasketBounce Wrote:  ^Create space with your dance moves. If you can't do that, if it's so packed that you literally can't move...find a spot in the club that is less crowded.

Of all the dance clubs that I have ever been to, I have never been in a situation where I could not do some solo moves and get attention. Granted, I'm tall, but the idea of a completely packed club from the entrance to the DJ booth is a little extreme....

As for moves, try a move that matches both the energy of the crowd and the mood of the music. People will take notice.

If you are tall, raising your hands to the ceiling draws attention because your hand will be above people's heads.

Also, stand with your feet shoulder with apart. Puff your chest out a little bit. People will give you space.

Thing is people, normally with friends, have this tendency to move to the front near the dj where it is more crowded and sometimes girls just happen to be around you and they do give IOIs to dance with them. In this situation, what are some generic dance moves to execute (bec the house beat normally does not cater for dancing couples, its more to party rather than pick up at the dance floor)?

And in this situation, would you go for the kiss, assuming you just met met her at the dance floor? Or, does the guy have to isolate her for a few drinks before hitting the dance floor again. What has worked for you in recent times?

Post: #191

(11-19-2017 08:21 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

(11-19-2017 04:47 AM)BasketBounce Wrote:  ^Create space with your dance moves. If you can't do that, if it's so packed that you literally can't move...find a spot in the club that is less crowded.

Of all the dance clubs that I have ever been to, I have never been in a situation where I could not do some solo moves and get attention. Granted, I'm tall, but the idea of a completely packed club from the entrance to the DJ booth is a little extreme....

As for moves, try a move that matches both the energy of the crowd and the mood of the music. People will take notice.

If you are tall, raising your hands to the ceiling draws attention because your hand will be above people's heads.

Also, stand with your feet shoulder with apart. Puff your chest out a little bit. People will give you space.

Thing is people, normally with friends, have this tendency to move to the front near the dj where it is more crowded and sometimes girls just happen to be around you and they do give IOIs to dance with them. In this situation, what are some generic dance moves to execute (bec the house beat normally does not cater for dancing couples, its more to party rather than pick up at the dance floor)?

And in this situation, would you go for the kiss, assuming you just met met her at the dance floor? Or, does the guy have to isolate her for a few drinks before hitting the dance floor again. What has worked for you in recent times?

I think that Basketbounce gave a lot of solid pointers for creating space or finding space - but if we are assuming that you already have a girl that you just met but she seems to want to stay in the area that is most packed and you cannot hardly do any moves, then you are not going to do any of the show off moves in those kinds of circumstances - instead, you are just going to use the dance as a means to escalate physically.

I frequently think that you should be attempting to get the girl to move with your body... and if you are not in sync and she does not want to synchronize with you, then you have a bit of an uphill battle. The more that she synchronizes with you or at least tries to synchronize with you, then you are getting the physical feed back and it does not have to be fancy dance moves to be able to recognize that synchronization and to continue to attempt to escalate... so whether you go for the kiss may depend on the environment, how comfortable she seems to be with you and if you are getting that sense from her to go to that level.

I tend to mostly dance salsa, and we frequently need more space in salsa, but surely there can be environments that the amount of space is limiting the kinds of moves that you can do and then whether you also have some moves that work in the closer space to achieve your escalation objectives.

Post: #192

(11-18-2017 07:59 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  How do you guys dance in a packed dancefloor where there is no space at all. It seems you can only move in the same spot, so all that fancy dips and push/pull moves become very difficult to execute. In addition to the 'duff..duff' generic house beat that does nothing to increase attraction?

Is there some simple dance moves that can be done with such constraints? From what I see, most guys just bring her to the dance floor, hold her waist, shuffle a bit and go for the kiss. This is fine if you know her before hitting the venue but what if you just met her?

Like others said. Create some space but for the most part take the opportunity to get very close with the girl. Let her feel all your movement, your body heat, whisper in her ear.

And learn how to move your hips in those tight spots. Most guys only have two dimensions with hips. Forward-and-back and side-to-side. To take your dance and fuck game to the next level learn how to move your hips like they are one of those vacuums on a ball. Use all angles and multiple angles at the same time.

Post: #193

(11-20-2017 05:13 PM)realologist Wrote:  

(11-18-2017 07:59 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  How do you guys dance in a packed dancefloor where there is no space at all. It seems you can only move in the same spot, so all that fancy dips and push/pull moves become very difficult to execute. In addition to the 'duff..duff' generic house beat that does nothing to increase attraction?

Is there some simple dance moves that can be done with such constraints? From what I see, most guys just bring her to the dance floor, hold her waist, shuffle a bit and go for the kiss. This is fine if you know her before hitting the venue but what if you just met her?

Like others said. Create some space but for the most part take the opportunity to get very close with the girl. Let her feel all your movement, your body heat, whisper in her ear.

And learn how to move your hips in those tight spots. Most guys only have two dimensions with hips. Forward-and-back and side-to-side. To take your dance and fuck game to the next level learn how to move your hips like they are one of those vacuums on a ball. Use all angles and multiple angles at the same time.

Based on realogist's point to "whisper in her ear," I just thought of one other point that seems to come up frequently with me during dance. I have various one-liners that I use, but I change them around, and sometimes they come off as a bit cliché and other times they seem to work really well, even if they might have been used several times by me (or even other guys).

Of course, you should attempt to tailor your one liner to the situation, and this is another point, if the girl seems to be playing along with you and reacting in accordance with things that you say, then you are getting her more and more, but if she keeps saying "huh?" "I could not hear you" then you something might be wrong with your communication...

Accordingly, sometimes I use the line, "the music made me do it." I really did not want to do what I just did to you, but I could not help it... hahahahaha.. sometimes it works and sometimes it does not work so well, but you can get some sense whether the girl is playing along with you or is "thou protests too much."

So when you have really close space, you can certainly attempt to use that close space to become way more physical than you would otherwise, and when she seems to resist a bit more than you had expected, you might say something like, "I really am trying to hold back; however, the space is making me do all these things to you" hahahhaa.. "I cannot help it, I cannot help it" hahahahaha. Of course, you need to make your word choices depending on the girl and whether she seems to be playing along with you and accepting of your various excuses, and surely if she is laughing and you are laughing, then the "creep factor" becomes less and less, and her comfort will cause her to go further and further. You can facilitate that comfort by making it fun and using variation in your explanations, whether true or not.

I will just provide one more example. I had a girl recently tell me that she was really angry when I kissed her because I screwed up our whole relationship, and she said that she did not want anything like that and that it was really making her rethink everything about being around me. Girls say this kind of shit all the time, but you still have to be careful with your timing and your reaction and maybe even taking some of her "supposed seriousness" as a kind of joke.... At various points, I had said:, " I don't believe you for one minute" and I also said that you cannot put the "toothpaste back in the tube." Each time I laughed, and I attempted to see her reaction too, which her words and her actions did not align because she continued to hang out with me and the escalation continued, just as both of us knew was going to happen.. and the same is true with various playing arounds on the dance floor and the opportunities provided through closeness and going harder, pulling back and going in again... escalate, escalate, escalate .. to the extent that is it working, keep doing it and varying it to have fun with the whole process.

By the way, sometimes you can also blame her. You can say that I was trying to not go so far, but you were being so aggressive that I had to play around. You should try to control yourself girl... hahahahahaha...

Post: #194

(11-20-2017 05:13 PM)realologist Wrote:  

(11-18-2017 07:59 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  How do you guys dance in a packed dancefloor where there is no space at all. It seems you can only move in the same spot, so all that fancy dips and push/pull moves become very difficult to execute. In addition to the 'duff..duff' generic house beat that does nothing to increase attraction?

Is there some simple dance moves that can be done with such constraints? From what I see, most guys just bring her to the dance floor, hold her waist, shuffle a bit and go for the kiss. This is fine if you know her before hitting the venue but what if you just met her?

Like others said. Create some space but for the most part take the opportunity to get very close with the girl. Let her feel all your movement, your body heat, whisper in her ear.

And learn how to move your hips in those tight spots. Most guys only have two dimensions with hips. Forward-and-back and side-to-side. To take your dance and fuck game to the next level learn how to move your hips like they are one of those vacuums on a ball. Use all angles and multiple angles at the same time.

(11-20-2017 05:39 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(11-20-2017 05:13 PM)realologist Wrote:  

(11-18-2017 07:59 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  How do you guys dance in a packed dancefloor where there is no space at all. It seems you can only move in the same spot, so all that fancy dips and push/pull moves become very difficult to execute. In addition to the 'duff..duff' generic house beat that does nothing to increase attraction?

Is there some simple dance moves that can be done with such constraints? From what I see, most guys just bring her to the dance floor, hold her waist, shuffle a bit and go for the kiss. This is fine if you know her before hitting the venue but what if you just met her?

Like others said. Create some space but for the most part take the opportunity to get very close with the girl. Let her feel all your movement, your body heat, whisper in her ear.

And learn how to move your hips in those tight spots. Most guys only have two dimensions with hips. Forward-and-back and side-to-side. To take your dance and fuck game to the next level learn how to move your hips like they are one of those vacuums on a ball. Use all angles and multiple angles at the same time.

Based on realogist's point to "whisper in her ear," I just thought of one other point that seems to come up frequently with me during dance. I have various one-liners that I use, but I change them around, and sometimes they come off as a bit cliché and other times they seem to work really well, even if they might have been used several times by me (or even other guys).

Of course, you should attempt to tailor your one liner to the situation, and this is another point, if the girl seems to be playing along with you and reacting in accordance with things that you say, then you are getting her more and more, but if she keeps saying "huh?" "I could not hear you" then you something might be wrong with your communication...

Accordingly, sometimes I use the line, "the music made me do it." I really did not want to do what I just did to you, but I could not help it... hahahahaha.. sometimes it works and sometimes it does not work so well, but you can get some sense whether the girl is playing along with you or is "thou protests too much."

So when you have really close space, you can certainly attempt to use that close space to become way more physical than you would otherwise, and when she seems to resist a bit more than you had expected, you might say something like, "I really am trying to hold back; however, the space is making me do all these things to you" hahahhaa.. "I cannot help it, I cannot help it" hahahahaha. Of course, you need to make your word choices depending on the girl and whether she seems to be playing along with you and accepting of your various excuses, and surely if she is laughing and you are laughing, then the "creep factor" becomes less and less, and her comfort will cause her to go further and further. You can facilitate that comfort by making it fun and using variation in your explanations, whether true or not.

I will just provide one more example. I had a girl recently tell me that she was really angry when I kissed her because I screwed up our whole relationship, and she said that she did not want anything like that and that it was really making her rethink everything about being around me. Girls say this kind of shit all the time, but you still have to be careful with your timing and your reaction and maybe even taking some of her "supposed seriousness" as a kind of joke.... At various points, I had said:, " I don't believe you for one minute" and I also said that you cannot put the "toothpaste back in the tube." Each time I laughed, and I attempted to see her reaction too, which her words and her actions did not align because she continued to hang out with me and the escalation continued, just as both of us knew was going to happen.. and the same is true with various playing arounds on the dance floor and the opportunities provided through closeness and going harder, pulling back and going in again... escalate, escalate, escalate .. to the extent that is it working, keep doing it and varying it to have fun with the whole process.

By the way, sometimes you can also blame her. You can say that I was trying to not go so far, but you were being so aggressive that I had to play around. You should try to control yourself girl... hahahahahaha...

The hip moves sound interesting, anything that illustrates this?
I was thinking just grabbing her hands, move them them in a cyclical manner first, then full or half spins before holding her waist and bringing her in. At this point, there has to be some convo before going for the kiss. For the most part, the house music in clubs are seldom conducive for salsa or other fancy moves.

Whispering in her ear is definitely a nice move, in such a loud environment. It cant be too sexual or it might be creepy (since you just met her) but funny while conveying attraction to her. What are some witty yet, attraction building lines that have worked for you?

Post: #195

^^^^

Look up how to move hips in dancing for a guy on YouTube. You will see what I mean.

I will whisper whatever I'm feeling at the moment but I always end up coming back to "I love the way you move."

Post: #196

(11-23-2017 02:43 PM)realologist Wrote:  ^^^^

Look up how to move hips in dancing for a guy on YouTube. You will see what I mean.

I will whisper whatever I'm feeling at the moment but I always end up coming back to "I love the way you move."

Post: #197

Just found this gold thread. Thanks Samseau.

Looking back at my time in the SMP from 15 to late 30s, if there was one thing I would do if I had those years again would be to learn to dance. The Western heritage of dancing was destroyed by the 60s and 70s decadent quest for originality so most people born later would watch older people in their families dance at weddings while silently getting drunk on the sidelines.

PUA nightgame/mare didn't really work for me as I never got desensitised to the club environment. I used to wonder why I was an extrovert on the sports field in a tribal/ team situation but a wall flower in a club trying to get into "state". When I did dance, I found myself in a better state than that from alcohol-PUA and 'kino' was normal - no hover hand of doom.

But like many men, I followed the disinformation from Mystery, "the dancefloor is a trap."

Imagine if men invested the price of a weekend PUA bootcamp ($2000 to $3000) into dance lessons. As Sister Sledge observed, "the greatest dancer doesn't leave the disco alone."

Post: #198

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  The hip moves sound interesting, anything that illustrates this?

I think that realogist's hip movement point from his earlier post was to attempt to be varied with your hip movements, and the best way to get better is to practice, whether you practice privately or you practice on the dance floor. Some kinds of moves might come to you as you are "working" the girl, rather than practicing privately... Some more basic moves you can work privately and then when you have the girl with you then you try to put that practice into play.. and sometimes you have to mentally visualize and purposefully tell yourself, I am going to try this now... .

Whether it is hip isolation or some other body isolation movements, I will acknowledge that most hip hop dancers and free style dancers are going to be much better than me at such body isolation moves - because that might be core to their kinds of dance, as compared with the kind of dancing that I do; however, I have been dancing for nearly 16 years, and probably the past few years, I have been working on practicing various kinds of my body movements and isolation.. I frequently do what is called body rolls or shoulder rolls and there are variations and extremes in that.. you can have rolling sensations or shaking sensation or even a kind of vibrating sensation.. and the more you practice differing direction and differing motions the easier they become to put into play when having a girl with you ..

Sometimes I learn how to do shoulder and body rolls better by practicing on my own, and sometimes I practice with a girl (or girls over time in private lessons) or sometimes I just practice in clubs.. once you have a few basic ones, then you can practice others on the dance floor, rather than spending private time on such practice.

The more you do it the easier and less awkward it gets and the better you get at moving to the music or at least some kind of rythm that may somewhat close to the music... some girls are going to notice and others will not.. some girls have a really good "in-touchness with the music", and other girls are like total newbies.. and of course newbies can be easier to impress with basic movements.

Sometimes movement is much better, when you abruptly stop, too, especially if the music stops (or pauses), then you are just emphasizing the music with your own movement.

Back to synchronization - body isolation can be with any part of the body, but when she can feel you or see you that will cause her to attempt to synchronize with you (that is if she is trying to synchronize), and shoulders and chest and body rolls can frequently be part of that whole mix of changing the movements without necessarily only going with hips.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  I was thinking just grabbing her hands, move them them in a cyclical manner first, then full or half spins before holding her waist and bringing her in.

I am thinking that working the hands may be a bit too timid, but sure, you can do whatever you think works and transition between different things, as long as you try to make it work for you. I have found that using the hands or arms, sometimes it can be difficult to get the girl to synchronize with you because she might have "noodle arms" or a noodle connection, which does not tend to work as well with feeling connection, and in that sense sometimes if you are having trouble getting the girl to synch with you and to move with you, it is a matter of moving in more to the core, which can be shoulders or hips.. and then you are grabbing and touching parts that are acceptable... even with a girl that you may have just met. Her hips have bones on each side, and that is where you start,.. Frequently you start out by grabbing the more "acceptable" areas, and sometimes you avoid too much sexuality, especially if you are in public and still getting to know each other. Sometimes I have even grabbed a girl by the belt loop and said "I sure am glad that you have these belt loops so I have something to grab onto", or if she does not have loops, you might grab her by the hip and then move her around a bit, and then tell her that it would be a lot easier if she had belt loops or a belt because she is too slippery.. hahahahaha You just play around with the whole situation, go with the flow, and try to work the situation to your advantage, to have fun with it and to see how she reacts.. there is no hard and fast rule, except perhaps trying to make the whole matter fun, smooth and comfortable, even when there may be awkward moments or moments that something might seem to be going too far... and make a joke about the situation and maybe pull back before going in again.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  At this point, there has to be some convo before going for the kiss. For the most part, the house music in clubs are seldom conducive for salsa or other fancy moves.

This surely will vary from situation to situation. There may be feedback without convo.. and you may be able to do fancy or not so fancy dance moves, but still be able to impress the girl merely by going with the flow or even making shit up. Sometimes, I attempt to make the girl comfortable by telling her that I just make up my dance moves as I go along, and that kind of line seems to work better when I know the move really well, and to cause her to have more comfort and she likely knows that I have already done some of the moves hundreds of times but she kind of accepts my representation on a preliminary basis.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  Whispering in her ear is definitely a nice move, in such a loud environment.

Sometimes just a way to get interaction rather than considered whispering as a "move"... but sometimes you may feel more confident to go further if you are getting decent feedback from her.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  It cant be too sexual or it might be creepy (since you just met her) but funny while conveying attraction to her. What are some witty yet, attraction building lines that have worked for you?

I doubt that there is any set formula to any of the lines, except that some lines might work better for you and play to the situation better than others... and with practice you can just become more witty by playing around with it.. for example, you could whisper in her ear, and then get her to whisper back and then ask her if she just bit your ear because you though that you felt her teeth on your ear. Just having fun with it and improvising.

There sometimes is some kind of variation of a "one liner" that i say that I probably would not want to share on a public forum, because I kind of feel like it is my word choice, and maybe some other guys say something similar, but I feel like it is a bit unique, too... but I don't think that there is any one formula... and that if you practice various lines, there will be some that you tend to repeat, and they kind of become your own one liner that you feel is genuine each time that you use it.. perhaps?

Post: #199

(11-24-2017 02:26 AM)N°6 Wrote:  But like many men, I followed the disinformation from Mystery, "the dancefloor is a trap."

This is a very controversial statement.

I think it really depends on the level of dancing the guy knows. For the vast majority who don't take classes, it might be that going into the dancefloor especially solo or even with a group of guys who are also swaying to the music is going to do more harm than good as compared to posting up at the bar and approaching verbally first.

Unless the group of guys are having massive DHV qualities, like sharp dressing, with some girls in the group, in shape etc. and receiving massive iois in the dance floor, they risk coming off as creepy if they attempt to dance with a girl, whose friends can also aggressively (physically) block in that situation lowering you value.

Even with guys who are good dancers, there are many who just show off but do not escalate to the point of her being able to leave the dancefloor and her friends.

Post: #200

(11-24-2017 10:50 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  The hip moves sound interesting, anything that illustrates this?

I think that realogist's hip movement point from his earlier post was to attempt to be varied with your hip movements, and the best way to get better is to practice, whether you practice privately or you practice on the dance floor. Some kinds of moves might come to you as you are "working" the girl, rather than practicing privately... Some more basic moves you can work privately and then when you have the girl with you then you try to put that practice into play.. and sometimes you have to mentally visualize and purposefully tell yourself, I am going to try this now... .

Whether it is hip isolation or some other body isolation movements, I will acknowledge that most hip hop dancers and free style dancers are going to be much better than me at such body isolation moves - because that might be core to their kinds of dance, as compared with the kind of dancing that I do; however, I have been dancing for nearly 16 years, and probably the past few years, I have been working on practicing various kinds of my body movements and isolation.. I frequently do what is called body rolls or shoulder rolls and there are variations and extremes in that.. you can have rolling sensations or shaking sensation or even a kind of vibrating sensation.. and the more you practice differing direction and differing motions the easier they become to put into play when having a girl with you ..

Sometimes I learn how to do shoulder and body rolls better by practicing on my own, and sometimes I practice with a girl (or girls over time in private lessons) or sometimes I just practice in clubs.. once you have a few basic ones, then you can practice others on the dance floor, rather than spending private time on such practice.

The more you do it the easier and less awkward it gets and the better you get at moving to the music or at least some kind of rythm that may somewhat close to the music... some girls are going to notice and others will not.. some girls have a really good "in-touchness with the music", and other girls are like total newbies.. and of course newbies can be easier to impress with basic movements.

Sometimes movement is much better, when you abruptly stop, too, especially if the music stops (or pauses), then you are just emphasizing the music with your own movement.

Back to synchronization - body isolation can be with any part of the body, but when she can feel you or see you that will cause her to attempt to synchronize with you (that is if she is trying to synchronize), and shoulders and chest and body rolls can frequently be part of that whole mix of changing the movements without necessarily only going with hips.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  I was thinking just grabbing her hands, move them them in a cyclical manner first, then full or half spins before holding her waist and bringing her in.

I am thinking that working the hands may be a bit too timid, but sure, you can do whatever you think works and transition between different things, as long as you try to make it work for you. I have found that using the hands or arms, sometimes it can be difficult to get the girl to synchronize with you because she might have "noodle arms" or a noodle connection, which does not tend to work as well with feeling connection, and in that sense sometimes if you are having trouble getting the girl to synch with you and to move with you, it is a matter of moving in more to the core, which can be shoulders or hips.. and then you are grabbing and touching parts that are acceptable... even with a girl that you may have just met. Her hips have bones on each side, and that is where you start,.. Frequently you start out by grabbing the more "acceptable" areas, and sometimes you avoid too much sexuality, especially if you are in public and still getting to know each other. Sometimes I have even grabbed a girl by the belt loop and said "I sure am glad that you have these belt loops so I have something to grab onto", or if she does not have loops, you might grab her by the hip and then move her around a bit, and then tell her that it would be a lot easier if she had belt loops or a belt because she is too slippery.. hahahahaha You just play around with the whole situation, go with the flow, and try to work the situation to your advantage, to have fun with it and to see how she reacts.. there is no hard and fast rule, except perhaps trying to make the whole matter fun, smooth and comfortable, even when there may be awkward moments or moments that something might seem to be going too far... and make a joke about the situation and maybe pull back before going in again.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  At this point, there has to be some convo before going for the kiss. For the most part, the house music in clubs are seldom conducive for salsa or other fancy moves.

This surely will vary from situation to situation. There may be feedback without convo.. and you may be able to do fancy or not so fancy dance moves, but still be able to impress the girl merely by going with the flow or even making shit up. Sometimes, I attempt to make the girl comfortable by telling her that I just make up my dance moves as I go along, and that kind of line seems to work better when I know the move really well, and to cause her to have more comfort and she likely knows that I have already done some of the moves hundreds of times but she kind of accepts my representation on a preliminary basis.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  Whispering in her ear is definitely a nice move, in such a loud environment.

Sometimes just a way to get interaction rather than considered whispering as a "move"... but sometimes you may feel more confident to go further if you are getting decent feedback from her.

(11-22-2017 09:32 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  It cant be too sexual or it might be creepy (since you just met her) but funny while conveying attraction to her. What are some witty yet, attraction building lines that have worked for you?

I doubt that there is any set formula to any of the lines, except that some lines might work better for you and play to the situation better than others... and with practice you can just become more witty by playing around with it.. for example, you could whisper in her ear, and then get her to whisper back and then ask her if she just bit your ear because you though that you felt her teeth on your ear. Just having fun with it and improvising.

There sometimes is some kind of variation of a "one liner" that i say that I probably would not want to share on a public forum, because I kind of feel like it is my word choice, and maybe some other guys say something similar, but I feel like it is a bit unique, too... but I don't think that there is any one formula... and that if you practice various lines, there will be some that you tend to repeat, and they kind of become your own one liner that you feel is genuine each time that you use it.. perhaps?

Looks like some kind of dancing background is important to bust out the good moves.

I tend to start with the hands because sometimes girls do not like to be in full body contact with guys they just met but then some of them might be game if they seem interested. I guess, I am playing it with caution because one can always ramp it up later.

Not looking to derail the thread but looking at the generic dance floor in a random club with typical house music, most guys who are getting action are not prolific dancers. They don't even dance much. But they have the confidence and the ability to read girls to go caveman when they sense the opportunity with the right words being said at the right time.