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Should I ever flake?
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esperar Offline
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Post: #1
Should I ever flake?
I just flaked again on some chick. This is the third time I have flaked on her. I just make up some bullshit excuse about how I'm busy. Is this ever a good idea? She was being naughty by flaking on me the other night, so i did it back to her.
01-17-2012 06:25 PM
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WesternCancer Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Should I ever flake?
Flaking in moderation is ok. See /thread-9709.html for an extreme example. The effect of flaking on women is plain and simple, its a DHV because she'll wonder what or who you have to do that is more important to her, she will think it is something wrong with her that makes you not want to see her.

As for your specific example there is such a thing as too much flaking. Like many others here say if she flakes with no makeup or a big apology and its your first few dates just drop her. If its the third time you flaked on her in a row she might think that you straight up just want nothing to do with her. The retaliatory flake in my view should be used as such: her "omg i cant make it tonight i just got hit by a car/my mom died/i have an extremely important interview etc, do you want to get together on wednesday" me: ... many hours later " gay/cool/*nothing* (short one word answer which displays that you are not needy, dont say "that sucks i hope you're ok my *nickname*) then id say i was busy that day" at a later date (after some radio silence) i would arrange another date.
(This post was last modified: 01-18-2012 07:14 PM by WesternCancer.)
01-18-2012 07:14 PM
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Deluge Offline
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RE: Should I ever flake?
Flaking on a girl with for flaking on you first? That's just petty. Since you've already done it, go cold on her for a little bit. After things cool down and her hamster is going into overrdrive as to why you aren't talking to her, return and swoop. Playing hot and cold is like dynamite on women. Especially the young and hot ones.
01-18-2012 07:22 PM
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Gmac Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Should I ever flake?
Do you want to fuck her or keep making false plans? Stop screwing around and take control.

Vice-Captain - #TeamWaitAndSee
01-18-2012 08:50 PM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Should I ever flake?
We're going out tonight. I'm gonna go in for the kill.
01-19-2012 03:39 AM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Should I ever flake?
Someone needs to cut off my balls. Seriously. I don't deserve them.
01-19-2012 05:58 PM
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Deluge Offline
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RE: Should I ever flake?
(01-19-2012 05:58 PM)esperar Wrote:  Someone needs to cut off my balls. Seriously. I don't deserve them.

What happened?
01-20-2012 09:55 PM
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Vicious Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Should I ever flake?
Flaking is ok if you have alternate, 100% confirmed plans with a hotter/richer/more DTF girl. If you're flaking just to feel like a pimp or thinking that it's going to land you in poon paradise by itself then you are just stroking your ego, and your Mr. Winky by extension since that's the only sex you're getting.
01-21-2012 06:19 AM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Should I ever flake?
(01-20-2012 09:55 PM)P Dog Wrote:  
(01-19-2012 05:58 PM)esperar Wrote:  Someone needs to cut off my balls. Seriously. I don't deserve them.

What happened?

It ended with LJBF, but she still seems willing to come out with me I think. Thankfully I have another target.
01-21-2012 08:34 AM
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Deluge Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Should I ever flake?
(01-21-2012 08:34 AM)esperar Wrote:  
(01-20-2012 09:55 PM)P Dog Wrote:  
(01-19-2012 05:58 PM)esperar Wrote:  Someone needs to cut off my balls. Seriously. I don't deserve them.

What happened?

It ended with LJBF, but she still seems willing to come out with me I think. Thankfully I have another target.

Don't make contact with her again for a while unless you have to. As for this time, be physical earlier on. Get in a flirty vibe from the get go. Oh, and be hands on, but don't be creepy. Girls can tell if you're uncomfortable touching them or if it's just natural to you.
01-22-2012 08:33 AM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #11
RE: Should I ever flake?
Yeah, I didn't make a move quick enough. I'll put her on ice for a month or so then try again.
01-22-2012 04:23 PM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #12
RE: Should I ever flake?
At least I did one good thing and acted as if the fact she said LJBF and she has a boyfriend didn't bother me. I just ignore it when they say that, because I assume they're all sluts who will cheat.
01-23-2012 04:32 PM
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aries569 Offline
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Post: #13
RE: Should I ever flake?
the LJBF line can be overcome, but to be honest, the effort is almost never worth it.

I have had plenty of girls tell me they just want to be friends *initially* because they have a BF or whatever. I brush it off with a half assed agreement, and just continue to run game. With body language I quickly tell them that that is exactly what I don't want. Agreeing with a girl verbally, while disagreeing with your body language/actions is one of the easiest ways to get her panties flying off, in my experience.

When a girl tells you LJBF after a date though, that means she doesn't see you as a potential mate if you were the last dude alive. Not only would you have to run ridiculous game to get her in bed, but if you made 1 mistake at any time, she would be much less likely to let it go. Instead, it would be a reminder of her first impression of you.

So if you get LJBF'ed, really just move on. It was a learning experience, pursuing her further is just going to be a game killer, even if you eventually get her. Why? Because if you get her, you will have had to put forth un-natural effort, thus putting her pussy on a pedestal.

"There's only one game and the game is pimping. You can play, or be played; it's your choice." -- Mickey Royal
01-23-2012 07:09 PM
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RE: Should I ever flake?
(01-23-2012 04:32 PM)esperar Wrote:  At least I did one good thing and acted as if the fact she said LJBF and she has a boyfriend didn't bother me. I just ignore it when they say that, because I assume they're all sluts who will cheat.

Ignore it like you said, but don't keep acting normal. That'll just piss her off ("why doesn't this guy understand that I told him we're just friends?").

Just adjust your game. You didn't really care before, but now you truly don't care. Don't call her. Don't make her a priority. I wouldn't flake on her anymore, but just don't make yourself readily available anytime she wants to get together. When she senses she's not a priority and you're out with other hotties, that'll get to her and she, being the typical woman, will vie for your attention. Play it from there.

This of course assumes she actually does want to have something to do with you..even if it's deep inside and she doesn't even quite realize it. If she just doesn't like you because you flaked too much, then be honest with yourself and move on.
01-24-2012 07:07 PM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #15
RE: Should I ever flake?
Good point. I already let her know indirectly that I'm out with other chicks.
01-25-2012 05:12 AM
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esperar Offline
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RE: Should I ever flake?
Going out tonight to a party by myself. First time I've ever done this. Pretty nervous. Wish me luck!!
01-27-2012 03:42 PM
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drymarro Offline
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Post: #17
RE: Should I ever flake?
(01-27-2012 03:42 PM)esperar Wrote:  Going out tonight to a party by myself. First time I've ever done this. Pretty nervous. Wish me luck!!

Good luck. Don't be nervous. Just be social and act like you know everyone.
I've gone out several times by myself... like last night after I brought some girl home but it was still early(1am) so I went out for another 3 hours to some college parties that I just stumbled upon while walking. Don't be afraid. Never. And act like a rockstar. Cause you have the balls to roll solo.
Look yourself in the mirror before you go out and tell yourself how you don't give a shit and you will conquer tonight.
Veni, vidi, vici.

-Dry
01-28-2012 02:33 PM
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esperar Offline
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Post: #18
RE: Should I ever flake?
It didn't go well, but that's OK. The way I see it, is that I need keep putting myself out there to meet as many hot chicks as possible. I'm not going to pressure myself to score so easily when I'm still a social retard. In the future, I will screw lots of hot chicks. It's not as matter of if, it's a matter of when.
(This post was last modified: 01-28-2012 04:26 PM by esperar.)
01-28-2012 04:25 PM
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