Post: #126

A fuck up? I dont know, I think this has more to do with being over-confident in my own abilities, then an actual mistake. Often times overstepping can lead to mistakes, but hopefully good ones that you can learn from, and you didnt lose any money.

Long and short of it. Got into 6 month LTR with a girl I met in a popular coffee shop. 12 years my junior, fresh to the country. Her parents were with her, so it was a little ballsy. Its been one of the most rewarding and difficult relationships in my life.

Up until this, my game was solid. After three years, 100's of approaches, training and comradery with other players, meeting women frequently is never an issue. To the point where I have become very selective and proactive. Its a place I always wanted to get to. It led to meeting this one.

Over the last six months, its been up and down. I am used to women falling hard for me in the first few months. She did, but unlike most of the girls here, she is not a chronic texter. She holds back, unlike most of the women I have been with.

So, I came on too strong, talk too much, reveal too much, gave in and got upset at some shit tests. The whopper was she caught me texting other girls, just a few weeks ago. She threatened to walk, and didnt, but it made me feel the physical and mental pain of being dumped. I have felt it a few times, but its made me act dumb. In the past I could point to a crazy ex and say, "Its all her fault." This time I know I am the one fucking up.

The thing is; all of my success with gaming, has not led to a lick of difference in my relationship. It helped me get her(I love confidence!), but relationships are a different skill set all together. One you have to learn, just like anything else. I thought I internalized so many of the things that make picking up women easier, that once deeper in with one, all seem to fly out the window. My big fuck up was thinking I could ace this, based off my earlier success, without mentally preparing for, and putting the time and effort into crafting a relationship.

Post: #127

This was awhile ago, but always burns me to this day. This was after finding the manosphere/PUA world in the late 00's - so I knew the fundamentals and wasn't a total loser, but was still learning to put theory into practice.

I was out a club with a few of my friends, and managed to pull a decent looking chick - standard 6, good enough to bang. At the time for me, I might as well have won the lotto. We were fooling around at the club, she says let's get out of here, I live nearby. At this point I'd never had a ONS, so I was like holy shit - this is gonna happen. Of course at this point I was pretty drunk, and predictably once we got back to her place any semblance of cool aloofness I had evaporated and I regressed back to high school "first time I touched a boob" game level. Well, maybe not that bad, but I fucked it up. She suddenly was "on her period" - and no +1 for Mindless. I ended up staying the night, puking in her bathroom and stumbling home early next morning. I remember she had a stupid cat, there was cat litter everywhere in the damn bathroom- fucking filthy. Probably for the best I didn't fuck her.

In the long run it was one of those "next time you get in the end zone act like you've been there before" moments - but man at the time was I pissed. Particularly when my boys were asking "How last night went." Live and learn though - you only get better with practice.

Post: #128

Where do I start...

Post: #129

It seems that almost everyone here is mentioning events where they failed to act or did not escalate enough physically, or push hard enough for the bang, which is understandable.

But I am interested if anyone here ever had a game fuck-up where you did make a strong decisive physical escalation, (like going for the kiss) and it killed the seduction. Meaning you felt later you did it too soon, at the wrong moment or in the wrong way, and the girl never gave you another chance.

I have a feeling that hardly anyone has such a story....but I'm curious if it is possible.

Post: #130

I have a couple.

Years ago when I was in the military, there was a local bar where we'd all congregate, usually on a Friday night.

I'm nursing a beer beside the dance floor, minding my own business, when a group of girls pushes one from the group on to me. She kind of backed up on to me, slowly grooving to the music with her ass in the right place, with my free paw embracing her firm stomach.

She started talking to me, but the music was so loud that I couldn't fully make out what she was saying. Instead of saying "I can't hear you", I simply nodded in agreement. Stupid stupid move on my part. She walked away a few seconds after my head nod. I can only presume she asked me if I had a girlfriend. I tried to mend things, but she wouldn't even look at me after that.

Another was more recent, when I was first getting on the Airbnb train.

I was at an Airbnb hosted event where I met a cute little brunette German. Conversation and vibe couldn't get any better. Didn't even really need to think about what to say to her, it was all very organic, bouncing back and forth.

Managed to convince her to walk back to my apartment to "check out the best view in the city." Soon after arriving, she asked me why I'm on Airbnb. Instead of saying my usual line, about how I'm interested in meeting people from different cultures and showing them around my city, I dropped the ball and told her the honest truth - "so I can meet cute German girls like you." She scoffed at my response, went totally cold, and left soon after.

I also stupidly felt obliged to get her home safe so gave her money for a cab, doing this with a faint bit of hope that she'd feel obliged to pay me back and would therefore see me again. Got a text the next day from her saying she wasn't interested in me at all and I was crazy for thinking that she was. Stupid bitch.

Post: #131

Although not my biggest fuck-up, this is one that's always stuck with me. When I was a teenager, I made the mistake of asking permission to kiss a girl instead of just going for it. She let me get the kiss but afterwards actually said, "never ask, just do it." I never made that mistake again.

Post: #132

(03-27-2016 07:38 PM)Mindless Drone Wrote:  This was awhile ago, but always burns me to this day. This was after finding the manosphere/PUA world in the late 00's - so I knew the fundamentals and wasn't a total loser, but was still learning to put theory into practice.

I was out a club with a few of my friends, and managed to pull a decent looking chick - standard 6, good enough to bang. At the time for me, I might as well have won the lotto. We were fooling around at the club, she says let's get out of here, I live nearby. At this point I'd never had a ONS, so I was like holy shit - this is gonna happen. Of course at this point I was pretty drunk, and predictably once we got back to her place any semblance of cool aloofness I had evaporated and I regressed back to high school "first time I touched a boob" game level. Well, maybe not that bad, but I fucked it up. She suddenly was "on her period" - and no +1 for Mindless. I ended up staying the night, puking in her bathroom and stumbling home early next morning. I remember she had a stupid cat, there was cat litter everywhere in the damn bathroom- fucking filthy. Probably for the best I didn't fuck her.

In the long run it was one of those "next time you get in the end zone act like you've been there before" moments - but man at the time was I pissed. Particularly when my boys were asking "How last night went." Live and learn though - you only get better with practice.

To be honest that story is much more interesting than: "I picked her up at the club, took her home, fucked her then left" lol.

Post: #133

For me it is a shame ))

Post: #134

This was just before I learned about game back in the summer of 2013.

I was at a local metal show in my city that my friends' band was playing. As I'm standing up front watching the band, I gaze around the venue behind me and I catch this hot petite little number sitting at a booth with some scraggly looking kid who was passed out.

A minute or two later she walks through the crowd and stands right next to me sipping her beer. Making it obvious she wanted to be near me and potentially interact. I start chatting her up talking about the bands and how they are my friends etc. doing a little DHV. We are intimately touch eachother as we talk into eachother's ears over the music. I was turned on right then and there!

She goes back and forth to the bar a few times and asks me if I want a drink. I decline, but she throws back like 3-4 tall glasses while we are standing talking. She weighs maybe 100 lbs and is throwing it back like water.

I say my friends are having a little after party and she should join me. She says she came with her friend (who was passed out) but I convinced her to ditch him. She actually fished his car keys out of his pocket so she could get into his car to get her things (ha! stolen). She gets in my car and we are driving to my buddies' place. Her inebriation is becoming apparent as she is looking sleepy and talking a little stupid, but not that bad. I should have brought her straight to my place then and there... but I didn't.

We get to my buddies' place and she throws back a couple more beers and we chill for a while. She looks like she's about to fall asleep standing up so I get her back to my car and head to my place to "crash."

She almost falls asleep in my car but I keep her awake so I don't have to carry her up to my place. I get to my pad and she seems pretty awake. This is where I fucked up hard:

She smokes a butt on my porch and I'm hungry, and decide that she should eat too because she's been drinking all night and hasn't had any food (what the fuck is my deal?) so I fix up a couple bowls of ramen. She comes in and asks to throw on some netflix while she waits. I turn it on and she sits on my couch and watches something. I'm bringing her bowl of noodles to the living room and I drop it...

So what did I do? Yeah, I started making another bowl.

A few minutes later I bring that bowl into the living room and she is comatosed. I mean I shake her and everything not waking up. So... I leave her on my couch and sleep in my bed upstairs. The next morning she thanks me and says she has to get home, so I drive her home.

It was honestly the easiest pickup I've ever had in my entire life. She approached me and kino'd me, and I could have just brought her straight to my place right from the bar - but my severe lack of game and beta brain wouldn't let me make it that easy. The worst of it is that she was hot. I'm talking 8/10 tattooed alternative chick ripped Daisy dukes shorts and fishnet stockings mmm. Fucking hell.

Post: #135

(04-14-2016 10:06 AM)General Stalin Wrote:  It was honestly the easiest pickup I've ever had in my entire life. She approached me and kino'd me, and I could have just brought her straight to my place right from the bar - but my severe lack of game and beta brain wouldn't let me make it that easy. The worst of it is that she was hot. I'm talking 8/10 tattooed alternative chick ripped Daisy dukes shorts and fishnet stockings mmm. Fucking hell.

This is so sad. I feel you.

For me it is honestly hard to remember any fuck ups in game. There are surely some times, but I guess the most common one over my lifespan is being too drunk and lifting too many girls in the same room. Apparently this is my go to move when I had a glass too many. And in a sense it is not so bad, but when you do it to several girls, it will look messed up and too desperate.

However, I do remember fuck ups back in my junior high school days, although it wouldn´t lead to fucking, it was obviously major fuck ups. I wonder if I can get some notches on the upcoming 10 year reunion.

Post: #136

One time in Los Angeles, before I had game, a yoga instructor invited me over for dinner, I had no clue, I thought she just wanted to be friends and was being nice. She kept smiling at me, and it was 8 pm.

Why I thought this, because I ask her out 4x, and she said no, I knew her for 4 weeks, and she dogged me for 4 weeks, as a beta, I internalize this rejection and than one day she sent me a text for dinner, this took 4 weeks to happen. Inside I was demoralize. We had wine too

Post: #137

I met a 21 year old German girl who came to South Africa to do some 'social work'. One night after weeks of hanging out she asked me to walk her home. The full moon hung above our heads and I sensed an escalation window was opening. So Instead of moving in for the kill, I asked if I could kiss her. She shook her head, no doubt as her pussy was drying up, shook my hand and said goodnight. I jacked off later that night.

Post: #138

I went to date with one very beautyful 19 yo girl, the evening went smooth and we had a lot of fun. After we got out of bar, we´ve kissed for long time and she was sighing like when fucking and was totally aroused. I could definitely fuck her on that evening, but instead of it I was thinking like "she is good material and I don´t want to spoil my view of her by banging her on the first date" ............... of course that was dead end street for me and lost my chance to bang this young chick who could be maybe best notch ever.

But these are the experiences that teach the most.

Post: #139

(04-15-2016 09:09 AM)HOD Wrote:  as a beta, I internalize this rejection and (snip)... Inside I was demoralize.

You only briefly touched on this but I think it's a very, very salient point about game and confidence. So many guys (myself included at times) let rejection become internalized, which is a form of poosy pedestalization, and it does lots of damage to your game in the long run. A critical element of game is not letting this happen, thus leading to what we call outcome independence. That's something that cheesy PUA's talk about a lot, but don't really address how you get there other than "abundance mentality bruh" and other BS platitudes.

Post: #140

(10-13-2016 11:15 AM)Red_Pillage Wrote:  That's something that cheesy PUA's talk about a lot, but don't really address how you get there other than "abundance mentality bruh" and other BS platitudes.

Do you have any good ways of getting rid of that internalization? I've had it happen in other areas of my life besides girls. I can usually handle the small rejections with no qualms, but the big ones are like a slap to the face followed by a swift punch to the gut.

Post: #141

My Biggest mistake trying to bang chicks was talking to them like they read or knew anything about the world around them.

Post: #142

(10-13-2016 04:56 PM)King of Monkeys Wrote:  

(10-13-2016 11:15 AM)Red_Pillage Wrote:  That's something that cheesy PUA's talk about a lot, but don't really address how you get there other than "abundance mentality bruh" and other BS platitudes.

Do you have any good ways of getting rid of that internalization? I've had it happen in other areas of my life besides girls. I can usually handle the small rejections with no qualms, but the big ones are like a slap to the face followed by a swift punch to the gut.

I have a way of dealing with it that works for me, but may not work for others. I'll blow myself out, almost intentionally. When I go out with my wing (which I haven't in awhile) we will approach shamelessly and run overly assholish game which works lots of the time, but can also lead to being rebuffed with extreme prejudice. I laugh about it. Rejection becomes comical / farcical in my mind at that point. Some could say this is anti game but whatever. But you know what, I don't care; sometimes after a night of being shot down repeatedly (and maybe a few make outs but no bang) I feel more confident rather than less. It's when you keep to yourself and are scared to approach that the self doubt creeps in like a slow poison.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, don't shield yourself from rejection, expose yourself to it. All you're doing is protecting your ego. Your ego is the enemy of good game.

Post: #143

In a club in Poland, making out with sisters. Had an apartment nearby and should have bounced and gone for 3sum. Ended up drinking too much with them and waking up on a sofa. If only!

Post: #144

(03-28-2016 05:51 AM)Windom Earle Wrote:  I have a couple.

Years ago when I was in the military, there was a local bar where we'd all congregate, usually on a Friday night.

I'm nursing a beer beside the dance floor, minding my own business, when a group of girls pushes one from the group on to me. She kind of backed up on to me, slowly grooving to the music with her ass in the right place, with my free paw embracing her firm stomach.

She started talking to me, but the music was so loud that I couldn't fully make out what she was saying. Instead of saying "I can't hear you", I simply nodded in agreement. Stupid stupid move on my part. She walked away a few seconds after my head nod. I can only presume she asked me if I had a girlfriend. I tried to mend things, but she wouldn't even look at me after that.

Another was more recent, when I was first getting on the Airbnb train.

I was at an Airbnb hosted event where I met a cute little brunette German. Conversation and vibe couldn't get any better. Didn't even really need to think about what to say to her, it was all very organic, bouncing back and forth.

Managed to convince her to walk back to my apartment to "check out the best view in the city." Soon after arriving, she asked me why I'm on Airbnb. Instead of saying my usual line, about how I'm interested in meeting people from different cultures and showing them around my city, I dropped the ball and told her the honest truth - "so I can meet cute German girls like you." She scoffed at my response, went totally cold, and left soon after.

I also stupidly felt obliged to get her home safe so gave her money for a cab, doing this with a faint bit of hope that she'd feel obliged to pay me back and would therefore see me again. Got a text the next day from her saying she wasn't interested in me at all and I was crazy for thinking that she was. Stupid bitch.

That sucks bad. I was always told that German grls are pretty nonchalant about fucking. ???

Post: #145

(03-28-2016 05:44 AM)Mercenary Wrote:  It seems that almost everyone here is mentioning events where they failed to act or did not escalate enough physically, or push hard enough for the bang, which is understandable.

But I am interested if anyone here ever had a game fuck-up where you did make a strong decisive physical escalation, (like going for the kiss) and it killed the seduction. Meaning you felt later you did it too soon, at the wrong moment or in the wrong way, and the girl never gave you another chance.

I have a feeling that hardly anyone has such a story....but I'm curious if it is possible.

Happens all the time. Push too hard too early and it can just be a turn off. For me, when I go latin dancing and I'm with a girl for a second/third song and that song is Bachata, I will always go for the kiss. They often are super into the dancing but the kiss puts them off and they back off.

Post: #146

Yesterday a perfect 10 sits 5 feet away at an uncrowded coffee shop and I didn't open

Post: #147

I consider myself a veteran but shit.. where to start.

Hit on a girls friend while I was out with the girl with the girl I was interested in.

Ended up losing both girls. WTF was I thinking?

I think alot of times I end up doing something stupid while gaming, alcohol is involved.

Game + Me + Alcohol do not mix well together..... I don't get stupid sloppy drunk but I end up getting drunk and making stupid mistakes. Since Ive stopped drinking too much while going out shit has been night and day. I have to focus while gaming or else things just dont progress or go bad.