It used to be, whenever I was killing time at the public library, I would take a peek at celebrities magazines like People or Us, and have a look at the beautiful people. Over time, this has become less and less satisfying, and I don't know if celebrities are getting uglier, or I am getting pickier, but when I a look at A LOT of our female celebrities, even when they are young, they look like painted hideousities to me, and one day, I thought to myself:
I see better looking women in random mugshots on the internet than I do on the red carpet.
So today, I checked a small town's mugshot page, and searched Google News for the most recent red carpet photo shoot, and chose the two best looking mugshots and then selected some celebrities. Not scouring the internet for mugshots. Just a small town nearby. And not looking for the ugliest celebrity red carpet. Just the most recent one.
Now, I am not being one hundred percent fair with the celebs, because I didn't select the best looking ones, but I didn't choose the ugliest either, and I didn't pick super old celebrities to compare against super young mugshots. I chose some fairly good looking actresses.
So this is what I found, randomly, today. It is not just would you bang, it is who would you rather bang, girl in the mugshot, or celebrity on the red carpet?
First up, a young lady we will refer to as Theft 2:
That was her mugshot. Here she is in her natural digital habitat:
Would you rather bang her or a red carpet dolled up Zoe Kazan?
Next up, is the second mugshot from today. This one has been a busy girl and there are many mugshots to choose from with that flattering station house lighting. Here is her mugshot from today. I will call her Criminal Trespass First Degree. And that is being generous with her history:
She has so many mugshots, she has mastered the mugshot selfie angle:
And this is how she looks on Myspace or Facebook, already forgot which:
So would you rather bang her or this famous red carpet scrapper, whose name has slipped my mind and I am not willing to Google:
I know I am stacking the deck a bit, so to make it fairer, just compare the celebrity to the actual mugshots, and ask, which would you rather? Famous actress, or small town marginally successful crimimal?