Post: #26

Quote:The Ashley Madison hack has revealed a lot of interesting things about the men who used the extramarital-dating site, including which cities, states, and universities they're from.
But what about the women?

It turns out, there may not have been very many women. As in, almost none.

Gizmodo editor-in-chief Annalee Newitz analyzed the data from the site's user database and found a lot of suspicious stuff suggesting that nearly all the female accounts were fake, maintained by the company's employees.

First, the official numbers. The info that the hackers published contained about 31 million accounts apparently belonging to men, and about 5 million apparently belonging to women.

But when Newitz dug deeper, she found a bunch of test accounts that ended with ashleymadison.com, suggesting that they were created internally (90% of them were for women), as well as 350 female accounts for people with the same and very unusual last name.

Then she found three really damning pieces of data:

Only 1,492 of the women in the database had ever opened their inbox to check their messages on the site. That's compared with more than 20 million men.
Only 2,409 of the women had ever used the site's chat function, versus more than 11 million men.
Only 9,700 of the women had ever responded to a message from another person on the site, versus almost 6 million men. (This number was greater than the number of women who checked messages because it's possible to answer messages in bulk when you first visit the site, without ever opening your inbox.)
It's possible that most of the women signed up but never did anything.

Either way, Newitz writes, Ashley Madison is a site where tens of millions of men write mail, chat, and spend money for women who aren't there."

The site's parent company, Avid Life Media, did not immediately return a request for comment.

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/ashley-mad...58251.html
Further Reading: http://gizmodo.com/almost-none-of-the-wo...1725558944

I blame this on women's hypergamy. OKCupid already found that women rate 80% of men below average, and another study study showed that 30% of men are having sex with 100% of women, so as women start sharing the same men when they opt out of monogamy and marriage, these things are bound to happen and the differing sex ratios will only get more harsh.

Seriously though, what woman in her right mind is going to use a website to get laid?

Post: #27

No, what it proves is the neverending thirst of beta males.

Post: #28

I'm surprised that plausible deniability hasn't been mentioned. Yes, women want to get fucked. But outside of an established relationship, she will never ever admit this desire, even to herself.

Women hook up and have casual sex all the time. We know this.

But when they do it, "it just happened" and "she can't believe she had sex with that guy last night."

When women cheat, rarely do they have a plan in motion to do so, but they were emotionally open to it and the right guy, who pushed the right buttons, swooped in.

Post: #29

Maybe less women, but here is a story I saw from another forum.


Matthew is a successful, 48-year-old tech executive living outside of San Francisco. Over the course of five months from 2013 to 2014, his wife — we’ll call her “S” — cheated on him with countless men on the Ashley Madison website. Last week, hackers exposed the site’s 32 million users. Here, Matthew, who asked that his last name not be used in order to protect their two sons, tells The Post’s Dana Schuster his story.


When I heard about the Ashley Madison security breach last week, the first thing I did was check out everyone who signed up in my neighborhood. I’m a computer guy, so it was easy to create database commands to say, “Show me everything in the ZIP code.”

I recognized six names right off the bat. There was a business associate, a handful of family friends and even a dad of my kid’s schoolmate. I always thought he was a decent guy, and here I see he spent $5,000 on the site.

And then there was my wife of 19 years. Or soon-to-be ex-wife, I should say.

I first learned that S was using Ashley Madison on Christmas Eve 2013. I call it D-Day, cuckold-speak for “Discovery Day.”

The breach — which exposed credit card names associated with accounts, profiles, email addresses and more — brought all of that pain back like a sledgehammer.

Not only was I reminded of the torture of discovering that my life partner, now 48, was cheating on a site that flat-out condoned extramarital affairs, but suddenly I could read the profiles my wife, who used the pseudonym Sophia, created during her two stints on Ashley Madison. She paid $20 to have each permanently deleted, but clearly, the company did no such thing.

Her profile, “attached female seeking male,” read: “Not looking to blow up my life … I am looking to stretch my wings a bit and fly a bit farther.”

[​IMG]

My wife, to put it bluntly, was a cold fish in bed throughout our nearly two decades of marriage, so it was devastating to see her explicit fantasies laid out there so unabashedly. When we were together, she wasn’t into oral stuff, she wasn’t into kinky stuff — but on the site, she checked all the boxes: “I like to give oral,” “I like to get oral.”

Had you asked me two years ago if I ever imagined S would cheat on me, no less on a site like Ashley Madison, the answer would have been a vehement no.

We first met at a party when I was at business school. She came as someone’s guest. It wasn’t love at first sight, but I was interested right away.

We were a vanilla family, which was fine with me. We had two beautiful boys, now 11 and 16, and had typical dinners out and vacations up and down the coast of California and to visit S’ family.

Not too long ago, after years of struggling financially, my software company, with a valuation in the billions, had its IPO. We did very well. We lived in a $1 million dream house on the beach just outside of San Francisco. She could do anything she wanted. The only thing S couldn’t do was betray me, but I guess I forgot to be clear about that.

In the fall of 2013, we were going through a rough patch. My wife, who was the picture-perfect mother to the outside world — [parent-teacher organization] president, community volunteer, the works — was turning hostile and contemptuous. In response, I became withdrawn and distant. We decided to go to marriage counseling.

Not that it was doing much good. She had started wearing fishnet stockings out for drinks with the girls and spending a lot of time with the bedroom door closed. One month later, on Christmas Eve, suspicion got the best of me.

I turned on the computer. S didn’t realize that the Notepad app on her iPad synchronized with our email account. I saw a bunch of messages referring to something called “AM,” which I didn’t immediately connect to Ashley Madison. I figured it out, though, once I read what appeared to be a draft of S’ profile.

I confronted her. Turns out she had been on dates with at least six men from the site in a matter of weeks. Right around the same time we started counseling, my wife’s friend (who, mind you, is a licensed marriage and family therapist) suggested she sign up for Ashley Madison, whose tag line is, “Life is short. Have an affair.”

“She said having affairs helped her marriage, so I decided to give it a go,” S told me.

She refused to tell me the names of the other men, but agreed to delete her account. I assumed that meant we were on the path to repairing our marriage.

By April 2014, my wife was still acting erratic. She threatened divorce and told me how miserable it was being married to me. She bought hundreds of dollars worth of lingerie, but refused to let me touch her in bed, as I pleaded for affection. I was admitted to the ER for exhaustion caused by stress and sleeplessness.

So when I noticed a weird gift credit card peeking out from her wallet, I decided to look it up online. I saw that it was used for $80 at a boutique San Francisco hotel. No San Fran hotel is $80 a night! But after calling, I discovered it can be — if you’re only paying for a day rate.

I confronted her once more and she confessed that she was back on Ashley Madison, sleeping with married men.

She tried arguing that it would help our marriage, bring some spice into the relationship, and that being on Ashley Madison was a plus: Since everyone’s married, there’s no incentive to expose the other person. It was as though I was talking to a complete stranger, some bohemian. No one I knew would say something like that.

“You shouldn’t judge me,” S said. “You’re seeing things in black and white when there is so much more nuance to it.”

But really, there wasn’t. She was bored with me and wanted to play. It was very simple.

I tried to stay with her and work it out for three more months, but she ultimately revealed herself to be someone I didn’t want to be with. We separated in the summer of 2014. We are still going through our divorce.

When you’re betrayed in this way, to this degree, you become traumatized and experience post-traumatic stress disorder symptoms. The breach, needless to say, made it come back all at once. I triggered hard. My girlfriend of one year (we started dating after my wife and I separated) was a little confused as to why I was still so upset.

“It was really traumatic,” I explained to her.

People are surprised to hear about men whose wives are on Ashley Madison. Typically, guys are considered the philanderers — actively going out pursuing affairs — while women get hit on and reactively decide whether to cheat. But that’s not always the case.

Sure, the hack revealed that only 14 percent of Ashley Madison’s users were women. But it’s a substantial number when you think of all the havoc those people, including my wife, have wreaked.

I’m most worried for my two children. Kids can be cruel, and I don’t want anyone going up to them and saying, “Did you see what your mother did?” My older son found out about the affairs when he chanced upon an anonymous blog I kept on survivinginfidelity.com. He still speaks to his mother, but has a hard time dealing with what happened. Our younger son, thankfully, doesn’t know.

But maybe there’s an upside to the breach. Ashley Madison deserves everything that’s coming its way. The CEO is such a sociopath. Just think about all the misery he helps inflict. The fact that there are already two suicides linked to the breach is just so regrettable.

And for those who were caught, you should stand up and say, “Yeah, I did this. I admit it and I’m working toward being a better person.”

I’m currently looking for a new job in the tech world, and you can bet that I’m going to look up any potential new boss to see if they were on Ashley Madison — anyone who would lie to his or her spouse would lie to me.

Being divorced after nearly two decades of marriage because my wife was cheating on me on a site like Ashley Madison wasn’t the future I had envisioned. Back when we were together, I thought what we had was good. Only in retrospect, now that I’m separated and in a new relationship, do I understand how good it can be. My life is 1,000 percent better.

Now I understand what love is. It’s when someone appreciates you for who you actually are, and has your back. And when you’re not with them, you feel like something’s missing. And you can trust them with your life.

I didn’t have that before, but now I do.

Post: #30

Women are much more worried about their reputations than men. We know this.

As the gatekeepers, women hold all the power in the often unspoken "agreement" to have sex. We know this too.

Thus, in guarding a woman's reputation it is always in her best interest not to have her infidelity or promiscuity out on display. Signing up for a website devoted to cheating / promiscuity and putting their face out there for all to see goes directly against that hard wired female instinct.

Besides, as many men have already mentioned, as the gatekeepers of sex it's a lot easier for a woman to just go out and find someone in the real world. Assuming the woman is relatively attractive and not obese, but even then it's a much easier numbers game at any dive bar with thirsty dudes.

Post: #31

Women don't have to pay to use the site.

Post: #32

Mathew is in for a world of hurt if he thinks he found his answer in a rebound, imo

Post: #33

The media seems to be ignoring the data dump on that company's other site, Established Gentlemen, which was supposed to hook up chicks with rich guys. I wonder what the ratio was there?

Post: #34

(08-27-2015 12:05 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  If women really did love sex as much as men, then the oldest profession in the world wouldn't exist.

They do enjoy sex as much as men. The filthy things I have done to women will attest to that. Women are more selective in who they will do those filthy things with. As men, we only need 3 things:

1. Be thin
2. Be willing
3. Don't be fat

Bonus: Show up naked. Bring beer.

We have no investment in the reproductive process. If one of us gets Lindy West pregnant, we could just leave the country and pretend it didn't happen. A woman can't get away with getting knocked up by Quasimodo.

Post: #35

(08-27-2015 06:12 PM)teh_skeeze Wrote:  If one of us gets Lindy West pregnant....

Post: #36

5.5:1 Male to Female Ratio shows Thirst Epidemic of Historic Proportions

Post: #37

(08-27-2015 06:19 PM)Suits Wrote:  

(08-27-2015 06:12 PM)teh_skeeze Wrote:  If one of us gets Lindy West pregnant....

I consider fucking Lindy West as the same level as a woman fucking Quasimodo.

Post: #38

Women don't need something like AM to cheat. If a woman really wants to cheat she can find opportunities literally by leaving her house and being out here. Hell, the next woman I ask where the pet shop is may be a married woman looking for some side action.

Post: #39

Quote:Ashley Madison confirms what we already know about infidelity. Men are much more likely to engage in it than women.

No, it doesn't prove that at all. It only proves that if a woman is ready to cheat, she's a lot less likely to do it with someone she met online.

Post: #40

Married women wanting to cheat on their husbands are not on AM. They are working corporate jobs (fucking their coworkers and bosses), taking fitness classes (fucking the PT / yoga trainers), dancing classes (fucking the instructor or young guys) and going on GNO with their female friends (fucking the bartender in the bathroom).

Post: #41

(08-27-2015 09:54 PM)StrikeBack Wrote:  Married women wanting to cheat on their husbands are not on AM. They are working corporate jobs (fucking their coworkers and bosses), taking fitness classes (fucking the PT / yoga trainers), dancing classes (fucking the instructor or young guys) and going on GNO with their female friends (fucking the bartender in the bathroom).

You left out getting lots of strange on business trips. Any hot bitch going on regular business trips is fucking to her hearts content while hubby back home does the kids homework.

Post: #42

Agree. To but it bluntly, a woman can find casual sex simply from walking down the street and talking to the first guy that looks at her.

Post: #43

(08-27-2015 12:54 PM)jariel Wrote:  

(08-27-2015 12:20 PM)Grodin Wrote:  But above all, it's because if she wants to cheat she doesn't need a website. She already has one or more beta orbiter ready on the sidelines.

http://www.medicaldaily.com/back-plan-ha...way-305186

That article deserves its own conversation.

Quote:“For our research to establish that 50 percent of women in relationships have a 'Plan B' is a worrying sign,” said the OnePoll.com spokesman. “This news may cause a few men in relationships to think twice about not taking the rubbish out or choosing a night down the pub in favor of a cozy night in with his partner. This could spark fear in men across the UK and be great news for women looking for that extra bit of love and care so that their attentions aren't swayed.”

Post: #44

The term "starter husband" has been well known for a while now.

Another reason not to marry.

Post: #45

(08-27-2015 04:36 PM)germanico Wrote:  No, what it proves is the neverending thirst of beta males.

So why do women get 50-200+ messages a day on dating sites and men don't? Why have only 1493 women on Ashley Madison open their messages?

Yes, women don't need a website to cheat, but my explanation is that women as a whole are only interested in a small subset of men, so the ones doing the majority of the messages are undesirable (beta) males.

Post: #46

(08-27-2015 09:55 AM)Parlay44 Wrote:  Men want sex = Women want relationships with alpha male

Fixed that for you.

Women have no trouble having casual sex and pumping dumping less than alpha men.

One could argue that if you had sex with her that means you are already alpha in her eyes. IMO this is not true. Very often game is about having logistics and being in the right place right time, rather than being an alpha to women. How many of us here have fucked a girl only to never see her again?

Post: #47

(08-27-2015 09:32 AM)Hedonistic Traveler Wrote:  Not so sure.

I think it proves that women don't need to go online to get fucked though.

Cheating online is a big risk. Guys are desperate enough to take it, women aren't. They have other ways of getting fucked.

Totally agree with this. I find it hard to believe any 8+ woman uses online dating at all. Their options are endless.

Post: #48

(08-27-2015 10:24 PM)rpg Wrote:  

(08-27-2015 09:54 PM)StrikeBack Wrote:  Married women wanting to cheat on their husbands are not on AM. They are working corporate jobs (fucking their coworkers and bosses), taking fitness classes (fucking the PT / yoga trainers), dancing classes (fucking the instructor or young guys) and going on GNO with their female friends (fucking the bartender in the bathroom).

You left out getting lots of strange on business trips. Any hot bitch going on regular business trips is fucking to her hearts content while hubby back home does the kids homework.

Confirmed.

Hotel bars are great for meeting these women.