Post: #1

When you play the game long enough you eventually start to seduce some banging chicks. I've noticed a bad habit of mine where I'll go on a run of getting tons of pussy before grinding to a halt when I meet a really cute chick. I get this strong urge to lock down a hot girl instead of continuing to play the field.

It gets worse. Usually, I have no problems nexting girls for bad behaviour, but when I bang someone above my normal paygrade (say a high 8 or 9), I lose my focus and sometimes revert to beta behaviours. Although I'm aware of the need for boundaries, I find that hotter chicks will push them a lot more.

This isn't about any one chick, but a tendency of mine that I've noticed. Right now I'm traveling so I'm not even looking for an LTR. My suspicion is that this is a natural response from my brain telling me to reproduce now, but it's obviously not helpful in modern times - especially when we consider how truly solid LTR prospects seem to be shrinking by the year.

Has anyone experienced this? What did you do to fix it? I suspect this is an inner game issue but would like to hear your feedback.

Post: #2

If you find a girl you like more than the other girls you've been banging then why not have her as your girlfriend for a while. Assuming that is she is worthy of being your friend, even as a mini relationship.

It's good to take a break every now and again from constant gaming and work on relationship game for a while.

Post: #3

Quote:I get this strong urge to lock down a hot girl instead of continuing to play the field.

Why is this a bad thing? A meaningful relationship with one high-quality girl will provide you with more long-term value and happiness than fifty mediocre girls you pump and dump. Hedonism isn't sustainable and it's only making society worse. Ask yourself honestly - what value is this lifestyle providing you? Self-validation? If you know your game works, why not put it to good use locking down a solid prospect? Hooking up with a beautiful girl is great, forming a relationship with a beautiful girl is even more rewarding.

Quote:Right now I'm traveling so I'm not even looking for an LTR. My suspicion is that this is a natural response from my brain telling me to reproduce now, but it's obviously not helpful in modern times - especially when we consider how truly solid LTR prospects seem to be shrinking by the year.

You're fighting against your instincts. Instead, follow them. You can't lament the lack of LTR prospects and at the same time pump through vagina like it's going out of style, ruining girls and creating more bad LTR prospects for others. I think you're reading too many negative articles and opinions about modern dating and just saying "Oh well, fuck it!" while playing into the same cycle. Traveling obviously complicates things, but it's unfair to reduce complex decision making processes to mere biological impulses.

Quote:Has anyone experienced this? What did you do to fix it? I suspect this is an inner game issue but would like to hear your feedback.

We all have at one point or another. My suggestion from personal experience is to stop treating game like gospel, deriving all your self-worth and self-validation from notch counts, and look at the bigger picture. There are greater sources of pleasure and they often require an emotional investment. Use your existing skill set to seek these greater rewards. Follow your instincts, read alternative opinions, and most importantly, learn from some of the veteran players who had similar experiences. Many have a permanently difficult time bonding with women as a result of similar decision making.

Post: #4

^^ Good points there. The thing is that the truly hot girls tend to come with drama or have other annoying personality traits. Despite that I still want to lock them down. It's as if I start to settle on my standards if a girl is hot shit. That's what I was getting at.

Post: #5

Quote:The thing is that the truly hot girls tend to come with drama or have other annoying personality traits.

I understand what you're getting at. I'll save you the suspense though: every girl comes with drama and annoying personality traits. Top-tier girls don't suppress these flaws in the same way mediocre girls do; they've never had to, men give them what they want regardless! Stop thinking in binary terms (acceptable vs. unacceptable, good vs. bad) and focus the decision making process on compatibility vs. incompatibility. It's a more realistic way of viewing women and finding an appropriate match.

Hope this helps anyway - good luck!

Post: #6

I get what you're saying and I've been there as well. The only advice I can offer is what's worked for me. I just hold on to my rotation and I know you lose focus once you meet that "one bangin chick" but if you think about it, it really doesn't take much to hold onto side chicks (hence them being "side chicks"). When I start slacking, I think of it as medicine and think, "it's a pain in the ass but it's good for me"

The rotation I keep, leaves me with the insurance and peace of mind that allows me to revert back "fuck it, I got other chicks". It's worked out for me so maybe it'll be helpful for you.

Post: #7

As I have gotten older I have become more resistant to hotter chicks bullshit. In the last few weeks I've ditched two of the hottest girls I've hooked up with ever because I simply just didn't enjoy their company. Not so much drama as immature, princess-like behaviour, clinginess and general lack of personality. One I hadn't even banged yet, so felt harder to break it off given the time I had invested into trying to nail her. Also didn't help I was being goaded on by mates to get the bang too, screwing with my 'outcome independence' and piling on the pressure. So giving up on the bang felt like "failure" (and from now on future decent prospects I'm going to keep to myself until post bang). But fuck me the thought of just another night of enduring her to, in all likeliness, get blueballed again I really could not be fucked with. But 3-4 years ago I'm sure I would've hung in there longer without a doubt.

I guess it comes with time and age. And the more top shelf chicks you meet over time the more you realise they're not that rare and another will be along eventually. I guess it is an inner game issue but I'm not sure there is any real quick fix to deal with it other than just getting more and more reference experiences. I would however perhaps try keeping a couple of other prospects going too, just to maintain the sense of abundance. Tho I do agree with Blick Mang in that a quality girl is still worth more than an endless pile of P&D material, so keeping a few other 6s in the stable is still only likely to have a limited effect on resisting beta behaviours with the top chick. The only real weapon against it I guess is being able to find another chick that is at least somewhere near her level to keep on the go. Good luck with that...

Not totally in agreement with the assumption that top-tier girls are always annoying and always have personality flaws. Although the two recent ones I met for sure did, however in the past I've met a few top end (for me at least) girls who seemed to be quite centered and grounded. Albeit they were a minority. But I was never quite good enough to hold onto them. But that's my game not being tight enough, can't really have any complaints and I am glad for the experience of dating them.

For me however the worst aspect about dating a top end girl was the amount of attention they garnered every time you were out with them. Not that it was their fault, but it felt like they were a celebrity and you were nobody. Plus you could tell you were a real target for friendzoned whiteknights (usually high net worth dudes too) who were just waiting for the opportunity to take you down. On top of that you would get random dudes blatantly trying to cut your grass right in your face, some even saying shit like "really? you're with this guy?". Every night out felt like an endurance test of inner game and self control, and believe me it got extremely tiring dealing with it.

But my advice would be for sure try for a relationship with her. I don't really like the term "lock her down" as I feel, with the top end girls especially, they are very sensitive to being locked down. I fully expect her biggest complaint of all her exes to be 'possessiveness' and 'jealousy' but correct me if I'm wrong. Personally I think you're always going to have to accept the fact she's going to get a lot of attention no matter what you do so you may as well demonstrate you're different to the other guys by allowing her freedom and showing you aren't jealous type. Easier said that done tho.

Either way I think it's a good reason to take yourself off the playing field for a bit and experience what it's like being with a girl at the top end of your scale. Worst case you will gain invaluable reference experiences from it. Plus I've seen you out in action and I know you have absolutely no trouble picking up plenty of decent chicks easily. They will always be there for you to come back to, so you're not losing out on anything.

Post: #8

(08-18-2015 05:16 AM)dreambig Wrote:  I get this strong urge to lock down a hot girl instead of continuing to play the field.

Nothing wrong with that. Can you imagine having to continue playing the field into your 30s and 40s? Fuck that. Locking down a shiny one in a non-fucked culture is the only long term strategy. It's also the natural one in an ordered society.

(08-18-2015 05:16 AM)dreambig Wrote:  Has anyone experienced this? What did you do to fix it?

You just have to avoid being complacent. The only time you can safety assume a girl is going to stay with you is when you get her pregnant (again, depending on if the culture is non-fucked).

Post: #9

I shit test 8-9s by saying something directly disrespectful to them at one point in the early interactions. Like a really hard neg, which could be easily interpreted as total rudeness, even something slap-worthy.

If they can take it like a woman, they're usually easier to deal with in the long run and you just cracked their "high value" bitch veneer before their very eyes, gaining some lasting respect.

It's totally natural to have more interest - thinking more frequently - about the hottest girl you're banging. Black Ming nailed it though.. compatibility reigns king in LTR prospects, not looks always.

Even mega-players get taken out of the game for extended periods with top-end women.. that's natural order. Isn't that the point in game? Use it to increase not only your frequency, but also, and especially your quality?

I would determine the value of your decisions regarding locking down the hottest ones based on your future plans, and where you live (or will llive). If an 8-9 is a rarity where you live (like me in the midwest), plus, she has a compatible personality, why not? One thing she'll do is lock in your higher expectations of yourself, and you'll forge yourself into a better man if she's a good catch. Excellence begets excellence.

Post: #10

Blick Mang you are on an absolute tear recently. Your recent game posts have really given me a lot to think about.

Would rep you again if I could.

Post: #11

(08-18-2015 05:57 AM)Blick Mang Wrote:  importantly, learn from some of the veteran players who had similar experiences. Many have a permanently difficult time bonding with women as a result of similar decision making.

It really is underrated how much this phenomenon is gender indiscriminate. I won't, but I could write volumes on my observations here with women, and I'm not just talking sluts and party girls. The older I get, I really am starting to notice casualties amongst males a lot more as well.

Post: #12

(08-18-2015 09:43 AM)Blackwell Wrote:  Blick Mang you are on an absolute tear recently. Your recent game posts have really given me a lot to think about.

Would rep you again if I could.

Just repped him as I agree. I don't always agree with him, but his posts are reasoned and open-minded.

Sometimes it seems like I'm one of the few guys on here that has no problem with committing to one solid and cute to very attractive girl. Perhaps I've been luckier than others, but there have been more than a few girls in my life that I've genuinely enjoyed being in a monogamous relationship with by MY choice. That's not to say I haven't been in multiple commitments that I realized later were foolish, but as I've dated more girls and gained the wisdom of the redpill/game, I find that the commitments I make are longer-lasting, nearly devoid of drama, and rather fulfilling.

This is probably a weak analogy, but I think it's a bit like riding a motorcycle. It's fucking exhilarating, but with the risks involved with taking it around a populated city, it can be a bit nerve-wracking. A sweet sports car with some reasonable safety features can be way more usable and a complete blast to drive, worry-free.

And now I'll relegate myself to the drunk lounge as the vodka is obviously kicking in.

Post: #13

Next Thread: "Resisting the Urge to Make Millions and Retire Early"

Post: #14

Any girl you lock down regardless of how attractive she is will lose value to you over the long term. Even if her personality gains she will drop on the attractiveness scale due to the repetitive nature of seeing her over and over in your eyes.

When I've dated girls where I originally thought what the heck are they doing with me...always after a period of time about 3 months - 1 year I'd think, what the heck am I doing with them.

Post: #15

Co-sign on what BM wrote above. This is a conclusion most guys (should) reach after being in the game for a while and especially as you mature.

Yes intimacy with a single woman is a wonderful thing, despite what you may have heard. It's possible even in the U.S! This does not foreclose the possibility of having girls on the side, which I am a strong advocate of.

But constant pump and dump, which we know negatively affects women, also affects us. Takes longer but it wears at your soul.

Post: #16

I can't seem to finish writing this post.

1) You're right to want to resist the urge.

Don't let these used car salesman above me convince you to get the Mini Van when you came in wanting the god damned Sports Car.

You're Odysseus and they are the Sirens.

The whole point of game is to fight your natural urges.

Most men are lazy as fuck. Especially with women, his emotions, and his desires. Some of that is innate, but a lot of it is learned and reinforced by culture. The homey Rollo touches on it his blog, but he's not really a game dude per se.

Most guys would rather go with the flow, rather than keep on their own mission. So rather than follow his mind, he takes the path of least resistance. Often times, that's getting into an LTR situation, because it will be easier on him mentally.

It's a trap though.

Just because your biology is telling you to pair off with some hot bitch, you're gonna listen?

That same brain chemistry a couple years back said that you shouldn't talk to strange girls, that you should be respectful, and all that other biological and sociological programming.

That's what the Red Pill was about. Getting out of the social programming. The social programming isn't TV and SJW memes on tumblr. It's not hashtags.

Social programming is the stuff that is in your mind. The things that tell you right from wrong, what is good for the society at large and what is good for yourself.

The social programming is so good in this country, that people spend their lives building the dreams of others.

Ever see old people when you travel. Lotta them waited until retirement to see Paris. Dude wanted to go to Moulin Rouge when he was in his 20's, try and score with one of them dancers. In his 70's, with Agatha in tow, he might not even have the energy to walk over there.

For what? He got a wife and family out of it - but did he ever get what HE WANTED?

Fuck your brain, fuck all that bad advice.

Stay the course. You got on this path of game to not accept the bullshit.

A guy with super tight game is gonna be in situations with multiple dimes, all of them vying for his attention.

2) You want to lock this chick down because you think you can't get another chick of this "quality"

- all your past exploits, for whatever reason - don't count in your mind

- this is the scarcity mentality
- you don't believe in your own skills and more importantly
- you don't believe in yourself

The dangerous Game 2.0 philosophies of
- # systems
- game only gets you so far
- alpha/beta dichotomy

They don't give you the tools to cope with this situation.
In fact, what they do is limit your options.

With respect to the # systems and the existence of 10's -

Most guys that call girls 10's, think of themselves "objectively" as 7's, maybe a soft 8. Rarely do they think of themselves as 10's, as being worthy of fucking a chick because she appears in a magazine or has 100k followers on instagram.

So by using these #'s, the typical guy starts at a deficit. He starts at a place of weakness. He considers himself low value, so he has to either demonstrate high value, or make the chick around him low value. That was Game 1.0.

Nowadays, these guys have regressed even further. They think that they need all sorts of extra shit to even out "the glaring disparity".

Surgery, beards, full sleeve of tattoos, 1% money, exotic cars, fancy place, central location... All that shit helps, but none of it matters.

Also - Girls will be quick to say some shit like this to you, meanwhile last time they saw a 6 pack and a man in the same room - it was the Superbowl, and the man had already drank 4 out of the 6 pack.

You can't believe them bitches.
You can't believe this gurus either.

Your sense of self is too important.

That alpha/beta shit is the worst.

You think a real alpha is ashamed to hug on his chick in public?
If he's alpha, what these losers around him think, doesn't matter.
He's the fucking boss. All the real alphas I've ever met, the ones that get shit down, that step into a room and command attention - they're not worried about what the little people think.

Go out in the world and see real players, guys with real hot bitches - and they run the gamut. They can be ice cold players, hard charging assholes, clowns, comedians, deeply sensitive artist types. None of them need be this "aloof, mysterious, dark triad, alpha"

If a bitch thinks her guy is weak cause he shows her some love - THE ALPHA LETS THE BITCH GO. She's replaceable. They are all replaceable.

If he had to change his behavior to keep her around - HE'S NOT ALPHA. She's calling the shots if he has to cater to her needs, and has to mind his behavior lest the queen not favor him anymore.

That's where guys who preach this shit get it fucked up.

The whole point of being alpha, is doing what the fuck you want.
That's why you see real life alphas without chicks. He's doing him.

Real alphas don't tend to have game. They don't tend to care about the emotional lives of the people around them.

He might, especially if brought to his attention, or if it's part of his mission

But if an Alpha wanted to lock a chick down, he would do it.
And he wouldn't be ashamed of it.

You don't want to lock this chick down, logically.
But that voice in your head, that social programming + the bad interpretations of game - are telling you to do so.

If you want stay on with that Alpha shit, just recognize that no one forces an Alpha to do something. He does it because he wants to.

3) How do you get past this?

a) look at yourself in a favorable light
- you're young, or you're not dead yet.
- you're in shape, or you're getting in shape
- you've got money, or you're getting money
- your style is on point, or you getting you're style on point
- you've got a track record of banging chicks
- you have the mental strength to correct or dismiss a girl when she acts up. You couldn't do that before.

b) Ask yourself honest questions
- is this what I really want out of life? (No)
- don't I want to see more (yes)
- Am I getting better at this thing? (yes)

Staying vigilant about being true to yourself and what you really want is how you get over this urge to lock down.

Still thinking Relationship?

If you go through these questions and similar thought patterns, and you still want to consider a hottie for a relationship

c) Look at her
- does she really have a pretty face, or is it make up?
- does she have a good body, or is it the clothing?
- does she do things to maintain that good body, or is she lucky for now?
- what's her style like?
- Can I take her anywhere without having to be embarrassed?
- Can she take direction from me?

But there's more

- Can I learn from her?
- Can she help me on my mission?
- Can I help her on hers?
- Outside of the sex, can we work together?
- Do I enjoy her company?
- Can I hear her talk about her day without my eyes glossing over?
- If I need to hold a purse, go to the store for some pads - am I going to hesitate and ask myself where did I go wrong?

And finally
- Am I willing to walk if she doesn't give me what I want?


----------------------------

This isn't nearly as good as what I'd written for this topic previously, but I gotta say something now before the moment passes

WIA

Post: #17

(08-20-2015 05:16 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  - Can I learn from her?
- Can she help me on my mission?
- Can I help her on hers?

Yes, excellent advice. Or in other words,

- Can she help me to be a better man?

If not, why bother?

Post: #18

(08-20-2015 05:16 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  I can't seem to finish writing this post.

1) You're right to want to resist the urge.

Don't let these used car salesman above me convince you to get the Mini Van when you came in wanting the god damned Sports Car.

You're Odysseus and they are the Sirens.

The whole point of game is to fight your natural urges.

Most men are lazy as fuck. Especially with women, his emotions, and his desires. Some of that is innate, but a lot of it is learned and reinforced by culture. The homey Rollo touches on it his blog, but he's not really a game dude per se.

Most guys would rather go with the flow, rather than keep on their own mission. So rather than follow his mind, he takes the path of least resistance. Often times, that's getting into an LTR situation, because it will be easier on him mentally.

It's a trap though.

Just because your biology is telling you to pair off with some hot bitch, you're gonna listen?

That same brain chemistry a couple years back said that you shouldn't talk to strange girls, that you should be respectful, and all that other biological and sociological programming.

That's what the Red Pill was about. Getting out of the social programming. The social programming isn't TV and SJW memes on tumblr. It's not hashtags.

Social programming is the stuff that is in your mind. The things that tell you right from wrong, what is good for the society at large and what is good for yourself.

The social programming is so good in this country, that people spend their lives building the dreams of others.

Ever see old people when you travel. Lotta them waited until retirement to see Paris. Dude wanted to go to Moulin Rouge when he was in his 20's, try and score with one of them dancers. In his 70's, with Agatha in tow, he might not even have the energy to walk over there.

For what? He got a wife and family out of it - but did he ever get what HE WANTED?

Fuck your brain, fuck all that bad advice.

Stay the course. You got on this path of game to not accept the bullshit.

A guy with super tight game is gonna be in situations with multiple dimes, all of them vying for his attention.

2) You want to lock this chick down because you think you can't get another chick of this "quality"

- all your past exploits, for whatever reason - don't count in your mind

- this is the scarcity mentality
- you don't believe in your own skills and more importantly
- you don't believe in yourself

The dangerous Game 2.0 philosophies of
- # systems
- game only gets you so far
- alpha/beta dichotomy

They don't give you the tools to cope with this situation.
In fact, what they do is limit your options.

With respect to the # systems and the existence of 10's -

Most guys that call girls 10's, think of themselves "objectively" as 7's, maybe a soft 8. Rarely do they think of themselves as 10's, as being worthy of fucking a chick because she appears in a magazine or has 100k followers on instagram.

So by using these #'s, the typical guy starts at a deficit. He starts at a place of weakness. He considers himself low value, so he has to either demonstrate high value, or make the chick around him low value. That was Game 1.0.

Nowadays, these guys have regressed even further. They think that they need all sorts of extra shit to even out "the glaring disparity".

Surgery, beards, full sleeve of tattoos, 1% money, exotic cars, fancy place, central location... All that shit helps, but none of it matters.

Also - Girls will be quick to say some shit like this to you, meanwhile last time they saw a 6 pack and a man in the same room - it was the Superbowl, and the man had already drank 4 out of the 6 pack.

You can't believe them bitches.
You can't believe this gurus either.

Your sense of self is too important.

That alpha/beta shit is the worst.

You think a real alpha is ashamed to hug on his chick in public?
If he's alpha, what these losers around him think, doesn't matter.
He's the fucking boss. All the real alphas I've ever met, the ones that get shit down, that step into a room and command attention - they're not worried about what the little people think.

Go out in the world and see real players, guys with real hot bitches - and they run the gamut. They can be ice cold players, hard charging assholes, clowns, comedians, deeply sensitive artist types. None of them need be this "aloof, mysterious, dark triad, alpha"

If a bitch thinks her guy is weak cause he shows her some love - THE ALPHA LETS THE BITCH GO. She's replaceable. They are all replaceable.

If he had to change his behavior to keep her around - HE'S NOT ALPHA. She's calling the shots if he has to cater to her needs, and has to mind his behavior lest the queen not favor him anymore.

That's where guys who preach this shit get it fucked up.

The whole point of being alpha, is doing what the fuck you want.
That's why you see real life alphas without chicks. He's doing him.

Real alphas don't tend to have game. They don't tend to care about the emotional lives of the people around them.

He might, especially if brought to his attention, or if it's part of his mission

But if an Alpha wanted to lock a chick down, he would do it.
And he wouldn't be ashamed of it.

You don't want to lock this chick down, logically.
But that voice in your head, that social programming + the bad interpretations of game - are telling you to do so.

If you want stay on with that Alpha shit, just recognize that no one forces an Alpha to do something. He does it because he wants to.

3) How do you get past this?

a) look at yourself in a favorable light
- you're young, or you're not dead yet.
- you're in shape, or you're getting in shape
- you've got money, or you're getting money
- your style is on point, or you getting you're style on point
- you've got a track record of banging chicks
- you have the mental strength to correct or dismiss a girl when she acts up. You couldn't do that before.

b) Ask yourself honest questions
- is this what I really want out of life? (No)
- don't I want to see more (yes)
- Am I getting better at this thing? (yes)

Staying vigilant about being true to yourself and what you really want is how you get over this urge to lock down.

Still thinking Relationship?

If you go through these questions and similar thought patterns, and you still want to consider a hottie for a relationship

c) Look at her
- does she really have a pretty face, or is it make up?
- does she have a good body, or is it the clothing?
- does she do things to maintain that good body, or is she lucky for now?
- what's her style like?
- Can I take her anywhere without having to be embarrassed?
- Can she take direction from me?

But there's more

- Can I learn from her?
- Can she help me on my mission?
- Can I help her on hers?
- Outside of the sex, can we work together?
- Do I enjoy her company?
- Can I hear her talk about her day without my eyes glossing over?
- If I need to hold a purse, go to the store for some pads - am I going to hesitate and ask myself where did I go wrong?

And finally
- Am I willing to walk if she doesn't give me what I want?


----------------------------

This isn't nearly as good as what I'd written for this topic previously, but I gotta say something now before the moment passes

WIA

There goes the rest of my afternoon at work. Thanks, Obama..err WIA.

Im in introspection mode for the rest of the day.

Post: #19

My issue is I get extremely lazy when I'm banging a hot chick on the regular. I stop approaching and going out as much, because my focus turns to other stuff like my business. Then the chick wants to start an LTR, and I'm like "eh, it's too soon" or "I'm not ready" and the whole thing falls apart. Rinse, repeat.

That's my dating life in a nutshell.

Post: #20

(08-21-2015 06:45 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  Then the chick wants to start an LTR, and I'm like "eh, it's too soon" or "I'm not ready" and the whole thing falls apart. Rinse, repeat.

That's my dating life in a nutshell.

Goodlookingloser has a good article on the lock-down 'define the relationship' request from the girl. http://www.goodlookingloser.com/entry/ge...ck-buddies

'No' answers are a bad idea; a player always responds with vagueness or implied uncertainty. This makes the girl believe it's possible, and that your feelings are still in limbo, and thus she can still lock you down if she keeps trying longer. A 'no' just tells her "I'm wasting my time". Some of GLLs response ideas in that article are great examples, and kind of guilt her for asking the question rather than trigger the relationship into make-or-break.

Post: #21

Daaaammnnn, another WIA bomb! Wish I could rep him once more.

Post: #22

I think it depends on your motive.

There's a difference between locking down a hottie because you want to be in a relationship and just wanting to have some hot pussy that is exclusively yours.

Post: #23

WIA - "The social programming is so good in this country, that people spend their lives building the dreams of others."

One of the most profound truths spoken here on RVF. Remember this shit gents~!

Post: #24

I've been in the same situation as you 5 months ago when I got involved with very hot and equally annoying Russian girl. I don't regret the time spent due to many lessons learned but in the end it was a mistake.

Basically I had the same strong urge to lock her down instead of continuing to play the field. Unfortunately I got too caught up in feelings and did it too fast and once I was in that mode a lot of rationalizations made me stay with her instead of wanting to screen hard.

My advice is as soon as that urge appears and before you decide to lock down seemingly hot and cool girl spend few days with her non stop. It will help you quickly see right through her and figure out who she is and how she behaves in every day life. If she turns out great then go for it but let me tell you that most likely after those few days you will be discouraged and she will be screened out fast.

In short, those urges are real in every man but when actual reality of a LTR hits you the whole thing starts to become pain in the ass. Like WIA said if the girl doesn't fit your lifestyle and doesn't want to play in your team she has to go no matter who she is or how likely she is to change. Otherwise the overall resentment will grow and grow and will eat you alive.

There are two CRUCIAL things to make it work..
1. Setting expectations/frame asap aka being transparent about who you, your boundaries, what you tolerate or not, what you expect from the woman, etc. Failing at that will make it very hard to establish proper dynamic later on.
2. Being primarily focused on your path/lifestyle and goals and making a girl part of that. Failing at that will make you waste too much time on her that should be spent on improving your life.

Post: #25

I have no issue with locking an extremely hot girl down but she shouldn't be your only girl. Just because she's locked down doesn't mean you need to be. She should fit in your lifestyle as others have said and understand boundaries.

I look at it like this. If this hot woman is the world's best quality steak and that's your favorite food you are going to want her a lot. Occasionally you will want variety and may want some seafood, chicken, pork. The steak is still your favorite so you will have it more and can get it whenever you want because of the lockdown status you have on it.

The variety you get outside the steak will help you appreciate the steak that much more and stay ready and desiring the steak strongly.