Post: #1

From my very extended social circle,

Basically husband and wife are at a cookout, and wifey thinking she's just rapping to her friends and family unloads how she really (? )feels. In that setting, bitches often overplay it for the crowd. Showing out is what we call it. It is what it is.

Husband hears the whole thing real time. If I recall the story right, he lets her go on for a while and then walks into the spot and stops her. He tells her he's leaving.

And that's what he does. He gets up leaves, stops by the house grabs a few things and to the hotel.

Kudos to him.

She of course spends the rest of the time trying to get him back, talking about counseling (lol).

The follow up was that he got a divorce, but had to pay child support.

Best that could be done after being hung out to dry like this.

The question is

Does what she thinks of you really matter?

WIA

Post: #2

I just mentioned in another thread the way I hear all these collection of stories these days a woman can't just respect you for the long haul. She needs to see you as a super star and adore you off the bat with little active game.

Otherwise you are looking at a painful divorce at some point. She will find a way to ruin it.

Respect is just the starting point.

Like people say marriage is dead. I think even having kids with someone you are romantically involved with may start dying.

I think a couple may pair up just to raise children as roommates and date on the side. Unfortunately I think this is the future, everything is pointing to it though as far as how to be happy long term in the current world.

Post: #3

As long as you don't care too much about her on the emotional level, what she thinks about you barely matters as much as what she says to other people about you.

Bitches will always be bitching about anything in their lives to anyone whom they might compell to listen to their shit. I think respect matters very much, you must always put her back in her right place when she slips like that, otherwise it will get nothing but worse.

Good move from the fella, too bad he has to pay for it..

Post: #4

In your scenario, the guy overreacted by divorcing her, although his initial reaction was perfect. Sure, the wife didn't respect him by airing him out. But the key is that woman's evaluations are constantly shifting. She really didn't respect him when she told that story, but she felt differently once he showed that he could leave at any time. She had to respect him for that.

That seemed like it would solve the problem (until the wife manufactured the next one). He could have gone back to her with hand intact because she was begging for his return. Instead, he went through with the divorce and had to pay.

By divorcing her, he punished her for being a woman. The more appropriate response would be to make her respect him, which he did.

But maybe he was just fed up with her, and now he's better off.

Post: #5

My experience in relationships is that it's basically a constant wave of female influence trying to get you to change your ways, change your lifestyle, and change who you are. Like waves eroding a cliff, over time you are gradually worn down.

You start to pick your battles. And then you start to pick fewer and fewer of them. It is simply exhausting to constantly argue with her. Her stamina to bitch and argue with you is greater than yours. You start to wave that white flag.

You start to hang out with your friends less and less. Your compliance with becoming the man she wants ironically makes you stop being the man she was originally attracted to.

You must be prepared to constantly bring your A game to the same girl forever and always maintain the upper hand by being willing to leave her if need be. But she has one advantage over you. She is the only girl in the world you're allowed to have sex with. And guess what, you're hornier than she is and you want sex more often than she does. Run those numbers over a few years and the man eventually becomes a beta male thirsty for his own wife's pussy.

Monogamy has chewed you up and spit you out. You are no longer respected by her. And you are left to pick up the pieces when she leaves you for the alpha male that you used to be.

Post: #6

Absolutely matters what she thinks of you.

As Travesty wrote,

Quote:She needs to see you as a super star and adore you off the bat with little active game.

Her respect for you is like your physical attraction to her, in some ways... have you ever faked it? Maybe a cute girl that somehow turned you off but you still hit it? Do you want to be that?

Also CRUCIAL is she must respect herself! If she doesn't, she will grow to resent how elevated you are above her and may seek out someone closer to her own level. So she can "breathe easy". Girls like to work hard for your respect, but if she can't respect herself, she can't truly respect you.

Post: #7

(08-04-2015 07:10 PM)brob Wrote:  You must be prepared to constantly bring your A game to the same girl forever and always maintain the upper hand by being willing to leave her if need be. But she has one advantage over you. She is the only girl in the world you're allowed to have sex with. And guess what, you're hornier than she is and you want sex more often than she does. Run those numbers over a few years and the man eventually becomes a beta male thirsty for his own wife's pussy.

Again this is why I see the happiest couples where the girl is near-obsessed with the guy. The type of girl where if even if you are good friends with the couple and you try to neg the guy in front of the girl she will defend him immediately and maybe even fire back at you even if it is a joke.

You can't be in some even relationship where you need constant A game. It will fall apart. You need a girl where you can cruise on B- game and she still thinks you're great.

Otherwise it really is a lost fight. You need a handicap, it's tough to go undefeated for an entire season. Add a lot points to your score before every game, well it makes this much easier.

This is why working on self game is so important and trying to make your B- game pretty damn good.

Post: #8

It's a good question and it definitely matters. Deep down we always want our wife or serious girlfriend to see as the One. It sounds egotistical, but it's pretty natural really.

We want them to believe in us, our ideas, and our vision of the world and how it should be. We want this, but can often find ourselves attracted to women who will be the least likely to do so. Why?

Because if she were a mere sheep to begin with it wouldn't mean anything. However if you can convince the person least likely to submit, then you have a real victory in your hands.

I imagine that guy who left finally had enough. After all, when she bad-mouthed him like that she really became an enemy. He threw in the towel, cut his losses and maybe we'll see him down in SA, EE, or SEA soon.

So what's the answer? Probably awareness of how we are that way. Once we see it deeply, perhaps we can be free of it and not care about winning a victory with some entitled, feminist, what-have you. Then maybe we can finally enjoy and appreciate a woman who just submits lovingly and appreciates what she has.

Post: #9

In my opinion, any women who complains about issues between you and her to anyone outside of your relationship is a huge red flag, especially in a group setting. I can understand her confiding some issues with a best friend, or mildly teasing in a large group, but it sounds like she was airing out alot of bad things with complete disregard to how anyone would think about him. That is both disrespectful to herself and you.

Turn the tables. Would you complain about your spouse in a group setting like that? Probably not, unless if you really were fed up with her and were ready to leave. Complaining about bad qualities of the person you are with makes you look bad too, because why are you still with them? For a relationship to the point of this example, there were probably much deeper issues than this one event. They probably fought constantly and this was just his breaking point.

Post: #10

(08-04-2015 05:56 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  Does what she thinks of you really matter?

From my experience, there needs to be some level of respect at play.

I consider respect a fundamental building block between any relationship. If I value you as an individual chances are good that respect is there. When a woman doesn't respect you she'll either avoid you or use you as a means to an end. You've become a tool to her, and like tools you are replaceable.

If you want a woman to respect you, you have to get into her mind. Offer her enough value that she can't help but worship you. Women's minds are like play-dough and game is what lets you turn that play-dough into something interesting that distracts her from her irrationality.

The guy in your story was smart enough to get out, but for every one of him I can find ten of the opposite.

Post: #11

A followup to my post. ..

You probably don't even keep male friends around who don't respect you.. .so why would you keep a woman around who doesn't?

Post: #12

(08-04-2015 07:21 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

(08-04-2015 07:10 PM)brob Wrote:  You must be prepared to constantly bring your A game to the same girl forever and always maintain the upper hand by being willing to leave her if need be. But she has one advantage over you. She is the only girl in the world you're allowed to have sex with. And guess what, you're hornier than she is and you want sex more often than she does. Run those numbers over a few years and the man eventually becomes a beta male thirsty for his own wife's pussy.

Again this is why I see the happiest couples where the girl is near-obsessed with the guy. The type of girl where if even if you are good friends with the couple and you try to neg the guy in front of the girl she will defend him immediately and maybe even fire back at you even if it is a joke.

You can't be in some even relationship where you need constant A game. It will fall apart. You need a girl where you can cruise on B- game and she still thinks you're great.

Otherwise it really is a lost fight. You need a handicap, it's tough to go undefeated for an entire season. Add a lot points to your score before every game, well it makes this much easier.

This is why working on self game is so important and trying to make your B- game pretty damn good.

Damn potna, that's some A+ game right there.

WIA

Post: #13

(08-04-2015 07:08 PM)Bacchus Wrote:  In your scenario, the guy overreacted by divorcing her, although his initial reaction was perfect. Sure, the wife didn't respect him by airing him out. But the key is that woman's evaluations are constantly shifting. She really didn't respect him when she told that story, but she felt differently once he showed that he could leave at any time. She had to respect him for that.

That seemed like it would solve the problem (until the wife manufactured the next one). He could have gone back to her with hand intact because she was begging for his return. Instead, he went through with the divorce and had to pay.

By divorcing her, he punished her for being a woman. The more appropriate response would be to make her respect him, which he did.

But maybe he was just fed up with her, and now he's better off.

I heard the story from the girl's friend (also a girl).

I would have loved to have heard it from his perspective.

If they were just dating, or just married - cool.

But he went from having his children everyday, to once every 2 weeks. I don't have kids, but I see the way they affect my boys.

WIA

Post: #14

Below a certain amount of trust, you're discarded, and nothing you can do will reverse her opinion of you. Like when they break up with you, you want them back, but they dont come back. Women cross a line when a dude is out, and dont come back.

In the dreaded middle you're a thorn in her side, a nagging problem, much like a cuckold. You there as a provider, etc.

At the highest point she will do absolutely anything for you.

Where would you rather be? Much of where she is on this scale is determined by the man. But it takes a lot of work. As long as she knows you will walk, but doesn't want you to, you know you are good, and any diminished respect can be recovered.

If you want to be married, of course it matters. How would you like to be treated everyday? The man can largely influence this.

In this scenario my guess is, in her mind he was about 50%. She really didnt care how she treated him, but was too scared to leave herself. My guess is that trying to get him back was based in her own insecurity, not in her dying devoted love to the husband.

Post: #15

(08-04-2015 07:21 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

(08-04-2015 07:10 PM)brob Wrote:  You must be prepared to constantly bring your A game to the same girl forever and always maintain the upper hand by being willing to leave her if need be. But she has one advantage over you. She is the only girl in the world you're allowed to have sex with. And guess what, you're hornier than she is and you want sex more often than she does. Run those numbers over a few years and the man eventually becomes a beta male thirsty for his own wife's pussy.

Again this is why I see the happiest couples where the girl is near-obsessed with the guy. The type of girl where if even if you are good friends with the couple and you try to neg the guy in front of the girl she will defend him immediately and maybe even fire back at you even if it is a joke.

You can't be in some even relationship where you need constant A game. It will fall apart. You need a girl where you can cruise on B- game and she still thinks you're great.

Can a girl really be and stay near-obsessed with you if you're bringing B- game though? Unless your looks and status are leaps above hers, I would wonder if that can be sustained over a long period of time, you know? To me, relationship A game is always putting out attractive behavior while overriding weak beta/needy behavior that will naturally leak out if you develop strong feelings for her. I think that for a relationship to have a shot, the man is charged with consistently bringing this level of game

Post: #16

(08-04-2015 07:51 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

(08-04-2015 07:21 PM)Travesty Wrote:  Again this is why I see the happiest couples where the girl is near-obsessed with the guy. The type of girl where if even if you are good friends with the couple and you try to neg the guy in front of the girl she will defend him immediately and maybe even fire back at you even if it is a joke.

You can't be in some even relationship where you need constant A game. It will fall apart. You need a girl where you can cruise on B- game and she still thinks you're great.

Otherwise it really is a lost fight. You need a handicap, it's tough to go undefeated for an entire season. Add a lot points to your score before every game, well it makes this much easier.

This is why working on self game is so important and trying to make your B- game pretty damn good.

Damn potna, that's some A+ game right there.

WIA

See, I promised myself that I will not marry again until I internalize A+ game, and make it a part of myself, permanently. Unconsciously competent.

The truth is, many guys never get there. Even the top guys here make mistakes. And I don't think I will ever get there either, so that means no marriage for me again.

Not intending to sound self-defeatist, and I'm all for working on yourself and becoming the best man you can be. But in order to make a marriage last in this world as we know it today, we have to walk a tightrope for the rest of our lives.

One little mistake, you slip and fall. Then it's over.

Post: #17

Call me egotistical or whatever else, but for me yeah it does. Disrespect is a non-starter. If we're merely dating I can handle a little, until that bank get's dried up if you will. If she's my wife, she either respects or she's not my wife.

Post: #18

delete

Post: #19

Respect is everything. If a woman doesn't respect you there's nothing that she won't do to you, or allow to be done. Ask yourselves this question. Have you ever fucked another man's woman that respected her man, or her relationship? I can say that I haven't. I've fucked plenty of dudes girls that loved them, but I've never had my dick in a woman that respected her man. Why? Because respect and reverence keeps strange cock out of lizards.

Post: #20

I am willing to bet that this wasn't the first time she pulled some shit like that. The same thing probably happened before. She disrespected him and sold him out and he walked out but was willing to take her back. The dam just happened to break at that party.

I think about this kind of shit all the time because of my own LTR though.

I think everyone else is right in saying that a lack of respect was the pitfall in that story.

It seems like part of LTR game becomes just keeping her in line and making sure she doesn't forget to respect you.

In the old days guys would slap hoes to keep them in line. Now psychological annihilation becomes a surrogate for the slap.

However, most guys don't know how to play that game. In most relationships the woman can destroy the man psychologically. Your only hope is to learn how to play that game better than her.

Women used to respect men based on the fact that men are physically superior.

Today women have learned to respect men who are psychologically superior.

It's kind of a shitty situation for both parties. I've gotten in fights with my girl where she escalates it to the point where to shut her up I either have to back down or escalate the psychological fuckery even higher to establish that dominance.

In those psychological fights women are much more willing to hurt men than men are willing to hurt women. In other words, when push comes to shove men are weaker where it counts the most.

If you want respect you have to be willing to take it that one step further than she is willing to take it, which sounds easy until you realize just how far women are willing to take it.

However, most guys would rather just avoid that mess entirely.

Post: #21

(08-04-2015 09:41 PM)vinman Wrote:  Respect is everything. If a woman doesn't respect you there's nothing that she won't do to you, or allow to be done. Ask yourselves this question. Have you ever fucked another man's woman that respected her man, or her relationship? I can say that I haven't. I've fucked plenty of dudes girls that loved them, but I've never had my dick in a woman that respected her man. Why? Because respect and reverence keeps strange cock out of lizards.

What makes a girl respect her man?

Post: #22

(08-04-2015 09:46 PM)General Mayhem Wrote:  I think about this kind of shit all the time because of my own LTR though.

Do you and your LTR do cool new things together often?

Post: #23

(08-04-2015 07:21 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

(08-04-2015 07:10 PM)brob Wrote:  You must be prepared to constantly bring your A game to the same girl forever and always maintain the upper hand by being willing to leave her if need be. But she has one advantage over you. She is the only girl in the world you're allowed to have sex with. And guess what, you're hornier than she is and you want sex more often than she does. Run those numbers over a few years and the man eventually becomes a beta male thirsty for his own wife's pussy.

Again this is why I see the happiest couples where the girl is near-obsessed with the guy. The type of girl where if even if you are good friends with the couple and you try to neg the guy in front of the girl she will defend him immediately and maybe even fire back at you even if it is a joke.

You can't be in some even relationship where you need constant A game. It will fall apart. You need a girl where you can cruise on B- game and she still thinks you're great.

Otherwise it really is a lost fight. You need a handicap, it's tough to go undefeated for an entire season. Add a lot points to your score before every game, well it makes this much easier.

This is why working on self game is so important and trying to make your B- game pretty damn good.

Great points. So is the best strategy to raise your personal SMV as much as possible, and then LTR down a step or two, such that even on your B game the girl still knows your the best option in her dating universe?

The problem is that if you date down, the desire to game at your peak will come through, and guy's will want to get some new on the side that is equivalent to your peak game potential.

In other words, if an '8' guy dates/LTR's a '6', he may get a girl that loves and respects him at his 'B' game level... but he'll secretly know he can do better and be driven to show that capability (by banging 8's on the side).

On the other hand, if a '6' guy games his way up to dating a true '8', the girl knows she has better options and thus the guy is forced to be on his A game all the time or get shitty behavior/divorce/disrespect from the 8.

I've been thinking about the long term game prospects of this dynamics a ton recently.

OLS

Post: #24

What a woman fails to realize is that she is a reflection of her man. The world mesures a man many times by the woman on his arm. For better or for worse. How many times have you seen a good looking lad with a shabby looking woman and think 'He can do better' or assume he has no inner game?

Her behavior towards you to her friends and family is a direct correlation with how she feels about her relationship. Proud women talk their men up even to the point of bragging to induce jealousy while unhappy women berate theirs in a way that destroys his appeal to even would-be takers

All the way down to her sarcasm and body language. For women - this is code speak for how they respect or dishonor their men.

To me - respect is the root from which everything else grows. It causes her to consider your thoughts, feelings on a matter before she acts independently. It allows her to seek your advice and accept your direction. It also fosters trust.

Without it, you have a constant revolt on your hands

Post: #25

In my world respect is not everything it is the ONLY thing.

I was raised by a Sicilian American Korean War veteran - I learned that if you disrespect or humiliate any other man even in jest you make a mortal enemy for life - eventually it becomes his mission to get even even it it takes years - the longer it takes the sweeter the revenge.

The man is the builder and architect of his family and the woman is the foundation upon which you build it.

There are 5 Sicilian rules and the rules are like bricks they build upon one an other. Pull out a brick and the wall or family crumbles.

Love - base brick

Honor - second brick she always honors your wishes

Respect - she even slightly disrespects you once you call her on it in a firm even harsh manner and make it clear it will never happen again - like a corrective jerk on a disobedient dog. She dares do it again and its hasta la vista time to make like a ghost - NEXT.

Loyalty - She is either on your Team or she is not. She can't serve more than one master and can't be on more than one team at a time period.

Fidelity - (The woman you invest everything in to build a family cheats on you the solution is severe - it is called a Sicilian divorce for a reason).

Also the 11th commandment is you never knowingly make a mortal enemy out of any man and never let any man make a mortal enemy out of you because if you must dig one grave be sure to dig two. The wisdom of the ancients is true and harsh.

If a woman was raised right she will know these rules instinctively and she will be on your team and your team only win or lose. No one bats 1,000 in life and no one hits every shot they take - what matters is you stay in the game and keep taking your shots sooner or later with practice you win more than you lose.

I can honestly say that the reason I have never been married or divorced nor have any child support or alimony is that it is damn near impossible to find a woman in America who consciously or subconsciously passes these crucial rules or tests. And that includes 3rd generation Sicilian and Italian women who take to 3rd Wave SJW feminism like fish to water. I do not know any one man who married young and had their marriage last in a happy manner. Divorce rate on Nuke Subs was 80% - even defending your country or especially when defending your country absence makes the ginas tingle and grow fonder for cock close to home. I promised myself then I would never be a nuke cruise cuckold. Served me well my entire life.

I will also say i was unknowingly a red pill man all my life because of my respect training at an early age and you have to train your woman to respect you like you train a retriever... just like a loyal dog it is your job as the master of your house and home to train them as to what is acceptable behavior and what is not. You would not tolerate a dog no matter how loving if they crapped in your kitchen or pissed on your couch daily - they would get immediate correction and remedial obedience training.

As has been said you can not yell at them - you can not bitch slap them or whip them as men were expected to in colonial times - what you can do is call them out especially on issues of love, honor, respect, loyalty and fidelity... I can never remember a woman dissing me in front of other people because I never let it get that far - I play on the two strikes and you are out rule - first time they violate an initial rule I immediately and firmly call them out with something harsh like "WTF was that ?" I would never do that to you - respect is everything in my world, you want to keep me in your life that WILL NEVER happen again! What you can do is dump their disrespectful ass and elevate the next one in rotation.

The fact that it even ever gets to a WTF moment is a big red flag and I begin to work new and better females in rotation in case. Something as simple as putting a slore GF call or hookup in higher priority to when I am available is disrespectful and unacceptable, heading down to the cape partying with a Slorey GF and even rumors of bang-a-thons from other people I know at these parties while I have to work and its NEXT - she goes on vacation with a slut GF to some notorius bang beach you got it - it is NEXT. If she really wants to be wife material she will never step out of line on you before marriage and especially so after marriage - so if they ever step out of line I would just get in a few rounds of revenge sex while I bring up the next loyal bitch retriever in rotation (loyal female dog analogy here) in all due RESPECT.

Sounds harsh but a loyal dog will sleep at the foot of your bed and protect you while you sleep with their life if necessary - the literal definition of a loyal ride or die Bitch - any thing less is completely unacceptable. I was like this even when I was in the service since I was 19 years old thanks to my tough love upbringing. The rules are not everything they are the only thing that matters if you want to be a real Alpha neoman.

Of course if you do get one good woman who passes all the tests and you decide to take the oath the rules work both ways. i did not make the rules I just follow them.