Post: #1

I was using "Is that sparkle ...or glitter?" in my ramble. But now I'm even using it as an opener when they're wearing something or holding something (like an ornament they're waiting in line to buy) it will work with.

There will be something that sparkles/glitters in pretty much every room you're in during the Christmas season. Last night even the living potted poinsettia plants around the conversation pit were sprayed on their leaves with this.

Debate which is larger, glitter or sparkle. Which is smaller. If sparkle is only white/clear while glitter is colored. Then, if you see one, point to something with a rainbow effect under the light ("aurora borealis" if their English is native and their IQ above 100) and then ask if that's sparkly or glittery. The rainbow effect usually blows apart whatever theory you've developed with her.

There will be people that have worked with wrapping paper or ornaments and have it on their face/on their clothes/in their hair. Point out it's an occupational hazard. Like how miners got coal lung, they're getting glitter gizzard. They're shaving off glittery, sparkley years off their life, but they're going to look fabulous at their funeral.

But only if they're under bright lights.

Being the humorously confused guy that needs a helpful woman to explain to him the difference between sparkle and glitter just gets the conversation going for scared cat day game. Good for 3 minutes of conversation.