Post: #1

To give you a bit of background, This year I've been struggling with a lot of shit/depression/family issues. Haven't had the time to dedicate to game fully as I have placed lifestyle and health first, which is good but I have lost the mojo a bit. Well, I've gotten 2 notches this year. Yup. Two notches only, I don't feel bad confessing it as I'm here to get help.

So during the past 4 weeks I said fuck tinder and those dating apps. I focused on myself, working out, reading and self improvement and Boom I had one girl from my workplace hitting on me right away. A sweet-looking 7 girl with some red flags (tattoos, slutstare, seems to have a high libido) The thing is I like her a lot. She started to show IOIs as heavy eye contact and one day just opened me. Wanted to have lunch with me and during a few days she sat to work by my side (i work in customer service but it is a great job). Subtetly touched my hands, arms, beard, face etc. She asked me to go on a date and so we did.

I knew then I had to run the so called 'don't screw up game'. During the date though I was sligthly honest to her about my life and everything. I went for the kiss and made out with her. She seemed to enjoyed it. Due to logistics issues I thought a SNL wasn't going to work but maybe that was me being a pussy. A shit test was made by her and that is described in the next thread. That's the end of this chapter.

/thread-35278...pid1875477 .

Next week she still shows some kino to me and seems to be interested. So here's where I need your advice. Last thursday she asked me to go on a second date on friday, I agreed. She comes on friday and tells me it won't be possible as she had some blood tests for a surgery on monday. She mentioned this surgery since day one. I'm cool with that. It's saturday and I'm determined to ask her out this time around so we can chill and I can get the notch. She mentions she's going out with her friends that night. Just before we're finished she asks me if I have a problem taking guests in- no, I don't have a problem with that- I told her we could eat something up and have some drinks and she could stay with me. She said the one thing she loved the most about that plan was to stay afterwards, but said she would do on sunday evening.

We meet on sunday morning at our workplace (yes we work on sundays) Girl is quiet, shows no kino, and overall doesn't talk much. I had to tell her like, we are still going to my place right?- She says no--I want to be at home as I'm scared of the surgery- Well I insisted 3 times more and Forgot about it. I tried to be cool and said goodbye. She's had her damn surgery and won't be back until 3 weeks from now. She hasn't texted or hasn't called me yet. I was pissed for her not telling me straight away she didn't feel ok about being banged before her damn surgery.

With all this context, Here's my newbie questions:

1.How to hold frame when the girl is the one chasing you and gaming you?
2.I sent her a quick text to see if she was ok. Should I call her and now be the one who leads?
3.If the girl seems to be the one who cares more , how do you lead? Now she's acting a bit cold by text.
4. Is this surgery a good reason to flake twice? (ovarian cysts)
5. What would be your next play and would you guys do in my case?
6. Am I overgaming and being way too asshole for not calling her or texting her during and after her surgery?

I'm just confused and overall pissed about losing one good bang and possible mini-ltr for my lack of game skills. Thanks gentlemen!

Post: #2

1.How to hold frame when the girl is the one chasing you and gaming you?
Tira y afloja.

2.I sent her a quick text to see if she was ok. Should I call her and now be the one who leads?
I think 1 or 2 calls for 3 weeks is not bad. Just 1 (few minutes) I would do. If the girl is into you, it won't matter if you even don't call at all.

3.If the girl seems to be the one who cares more , how do you lead? Now she's acting a bit cold by text.
I've had this before many times. But, with just 1 date, I wouldn't say there is too much rapport/feelings invested. I wouldn't do too much and after
the 3 weeks I'd start leading smoothly.

4. Is this surgery a good reason to flake twice? (ovarian cysts)
Of course, if it's true. As you've said, with these red flags, don't you think she is taking another options on the side?

5. What would be your next play and would you guys do in my case?
I've bad-gamed in the past and ended getting girls bored/disgusted about my coldness, but after many flaking from my part and other things.
With just 1 date, I'd only call her once within this 3 weeks, or even just 1 text. Saving warmth once she returns, acting like knowing she is ok and that's enough to now for me. Once she starts working again, as ive said before, i'd lead smoothly, a bit warm and then a bit cold, expecting to see her reaction to know if she wants to game.

6. Am I overgaming and being way too asshole for not calling her or texting her during and after her surgery?
Even sex hasn't happened. Maybe she doesnt care as well. You still aren't her Papi.

PS: Waiting for advice from the experienced ones as well. I don't like rationalize too much my little game.

Post: #3

4. Is this surgery a good reason to flake twice? (ovarian cysts)

Yes. Hospitals, doctors and surgery are scary. Good reason to be a little fucked up untill the whole ordeal is over. It might take a few weeks to shake it off completly. She is only human.

6. Am I overgaming and being way too asshole for not calling her or texting her during and after her surgery?

Yes. Respect the fact she is human.

Post: #4

(11-02-2018 08:45 PM)lonewolf1992 Wrote:  1.How to hold frame when the girl is the one chasing you and gaming you?
2.I sent her a quick text to see if she was ok. Should I call her and now be the one who leads?
3.If the girl seems to be the one who cares more , how do you lead? Now she's acting a bit cold by text.
4. Is this surgery a good reason to flake twice? (ovarian cysts)
5. What would be your next play and would you guys do in my case?
6. Am I overgaming and being way too asshole for not calling her or texting her during and after her surgery?

I'm just confused and overall pissed about losing one good bang and possible mini-ltr for my lack of game skills. Thanks gentlemen!

1. In my limited experience, by staying playful and keeping yourself available to her on your terms.I ended up in my current LTR with a Peruana (both of us are expats to Uruguay) who just adores me by just being my aloof gringo self while not shutting her out completely while the thought that our babies would have the strongest faces grew and the Uruguayas proved brain damaged. Turns out chronic Mate use is probably neurotoxic.

2. You can call or keep it at text. Maybe try the max emoji challenge and see if anything catches. "[tired drool emoji] Toy Cansado]" has always received a good response rate in my experience as cold bait.

3. If she is indeed the more invested party you lead by dropping opportunities for her to demonstrate and embrace that. If she's acting cold she isn't the more invested party at the moment.

4. It can be. It is if real. Ice cream and chill is an option. Post surgery and chill can be very informative for yourself with regard to your patience for such things.

5. If you find her worthwhile you can play friend on your terms. Keep up low level fun flirting while showing concern for her health. Offer her an open invitation to take a break and enjoy your company. If her abdomen is being held together by stitches, playing her too beta will be just about impossible. In the worst case where no bang comes out of here, you can still grow a strong social connection for later social proof game. A night on your couch with ice cream and without fucking might be worth it for your own knowledge of your limits.

If you want to pursue her in her current medical position I recommend:

Texting her a photo of a minimal expense stuffed animal and a giant pail of ice cream. This is pure sappy beta shit, but its what can keep this channel open. It isn't a cheap channel as you have established, in the worst case you can evaluate how she helps or cripples your social proof game.

6. You could be. This sounds like a lot of trouble you are well positioned to opt out of by kicking this girl off your list or pursue her as a strong girl friend. Or you could have an anchor trying to sink you.

Post: #5

OP, if she has come to you telling you that she does not want a relationship than no biggie. You said in your posts that you don't plan on trying to wife this girl up.

She doesn't want a relationship so stop trying to be her boyfriend.

When you're with her act friendly and flirt and try your best to game her and make her interested in you. Focus on progressing physically and getting the bang, being too sappy and romantic is going to put her off. She wants an exciting time with a guy that she thinks is an attractive alpha, not emotional conversations with a low-energy beta.

Once you get the bang shit is going to be 100x easier to deal with, but don't give her the extra effort of you calling to check on her, texting her repeatedly or anything like that until you get what YOU want!

Don't focus on the surgery too much. Ovarian cysts are definitely painful from what I've heard and girls have a bad habit of falling off the face of the earth when something goes wrong with them. If you're not a family member or longtime friend its understandable why she hasn't been talking to you.

Send her two or three texts over the couple of weeks that she's out and then try to meet up with her when she's recovered, but don't try to run beta game by trying to talk to her all the time while she's on bedrest. That way, you don't allow yourself the risk of fucking things up over text while she's in the hospital when you can't do anything anyways.

Post: #6

Hi guys, wanted to thank you all for the advice. At first I decided to go for one single call and it worked out smoothly. She told me like: 'Too bad you have the flu as I don't want you to infect me once I'm back' That's a rough translation. However, she returned and she's quite cold and distant, I asked her out and she told me she was 'busy' so she would let me know.

One of my best friend's theories is that she got fucked so hard by some other dude that she doesn't want to hang out with me anymore, he told me I should have tried to go for the kill in the first date. I think I'm leaning towards this possibility. Don't shit where you eat! Will try to apply that! Thanks a lot gentlemen, Lesson learned, Moving on.

Post: #7

Also, this is subtle and maybe overthinking, but... why even mention illness / flu?

Just use any other vague, perhaps business related excuse for not being around... don't spoil the mystery with imagery of you weak, with chills, coughing and moaning.

Ironically, once you've converted a girl, the thought of you with the flu sends her spinning to please you with homemade soup and delicate bj's.

Sounds like she was on the fence and maybe it would not have mattered anyway -- but it doesn't help to be "that sick guy I haven't fucked".

Post: #8

(11-03-2018 05:03 AM)BadBoyGamer Wrote:  6. Am I overgaming and being way too asshole for not calling her or texting her during and after her surgery?

Yes. Respect the fact she is human.

Calling and texting a girl you barely know and have been on ONE date with because she had surgery. Aww.

"Respect the fact that she is human." How male feminist of you. Did I stumble into Reddit by mistake?

This is bad boy game? More like beta boy game.

Post: #9

(11-02-2018 08:45 PM)lonewolf1992 Wrote:  To give you a bit of background, This year I've been struggling with a lot of shit/depression/family issues. Haven't had the time to dedicate to game fully as I have placed lifestyle and health first, which is good but I have lost the mojo a bit. Well, I've gotten 2 notches this year. Yup. Two notches only, I don't feel bad confessing it as I'm here to get help.

So during the past 4 weeks I said fuck tinder and those dating apps. I focused on myself, working out, reading and self improvement and Boom I had one girl from my workplace hitting on me right away. A sweet-looking 7 girl with some red flags (tattoos, slutstare, seems to have a high libido) The thing is I like her a lot. She started to show IOIs as heavy eye contact and one day just opened me. Wanted to have lunch with me and during a few days she sat to work by my side (i work in customer service but it is a great job). Subtetly touched my hands, arms, beard, face etc. She asked me to go on a date and so we did.

I knew then I had to run the so called 'don't screw up game'. During the date though I was sligthly honest to her about my life and everything. I went for the kiss and made out with her. She seemed to enjoyed it. Due to logistics issues I thought a SNL wasn't going to work but maybe that was me being a pussy. A shit test was made by her and that is described in the next thread. That's the end of this chapter.

/thread-35278...pid1875477 .

Next week she still shows some kino to me and seems to be interested. So here's where I need your advice. Last thursday she asked me to go on a second date on friday, I agreed. She comes on friday and tells me it won't be possible as she had some blood tests for a surgery on monday. She mentioned this surgery since day one. I'm cool with that. It's saturday and I'm determined to ask her out this time around so we can chill and I can get the notch. She mentions she's going out with her friends that night. Just before we're finished she asks me if I have a problem taking guests in- no, I don't have a problem with that- I told her we could eat something up and have some drinks and she could stay with me. She said the one thing she loved the most about that plan was to stay afterwards, but said she would do on sunday evening.

We meet on sunday morning at our workplace (yes we work on sundays) Girl is quiet, shows no kino, and overall doesn't talk much. I had to tell her like, we are still going to my place right?- She says no--I want to be at home as I'm scared of the surgery- Well I insisted 3 times more and Forgot about it. I tried to be cool and said goodbye. She's had her damn surgery and won't be back until 3 weeks from now. She hasn't texted or hasn't called me yet. I was pissed for her not telling me straight away she didn't feel ok about being banged before her damn surgery.

With all this context, Here's my newbie questions:

1.How to hold frame when the girl is the one chasing you and gaming you?
2.I sent her a quick text to see if she was ok. Should I call her and now be the one who leads?
3.If the girl seems to be the one who cares more , how do you lead? Now she's acting a bit cold by text.
4. Is this surgery a good reason to flake twice? (ovarian cysts)
5. What would be your next play and would you guys do in my case?
6. Am I overgaming and being way too asshole for not calling her or texting her during and after her surgery?

I'm just confused and overall pissed about losing one good bang and possible mini-ltr for my lack of game skills. Thanks gentlemen!

OK, first thing you really need to read Game by Roosh and every single article on game by Roosh and Heartiste AND put that stuff into practice.

I used to make the same mistakes as you but by going back and reading some of that stuff you can see where you went wrong and learn new ideas to try again. One thing is you seem too nice and honest which just comes across as beta.

1. How to hold frame when the girl is chasing you.

This is actually really hard and I have experience of fucking this up several times before I figured it out.

I can tell you what you should have done, but to really internalise game, a big part of it comes down to your attitude and beliefs.

If a girl hits on someone with no game, regardless of her red flags (he won't see them anyway) he tries to go along with it as eagerly as possible. This is absolutely the wrong thing to do as it shows you are desperate and have no standards.

This is also a great way to kill all the sexual tension because you are going along with things and so the interaction become boring. The girl is already validated by you telegraphing your interest in her. She may as well go and find some other guy now, she doesn't even need or want sex that much anyway just validation.

Making plans to have sex and any other behaviour that shows that you're interested in her is what kills sexual tension. You need sexual tension so that you can break that tension by having sex. Don't break it too early, learn to enjoy and be comfortable in it.

Now if a girl hits on me that blatantly, instantly I'm a little unsure of her. This sets the right frame for the interaction. This is not an act, I have reason to believe she's an absolutely insane slut for doing something like that, so my aloofness and laid back amused attitude is 100% real.

So my body language and things I say will reflect that. However at the same time I'm probably not going to pass up an easy opportunity and so I would have to just pretend I was evaluating her and that I'm unsure about sleeping with her (even though obviously I would bang).

To do that I would definitely not make plans for her to sleep over (terrible thing to do with any girl you just started dating) I would however arrange for things to 'just happen' and for that to happen 'by accident'. I would have some sort of reason other than sex for her to come back to my place.

If that makes sense to you I might try and help answer some of your other questions, I'm tired so this post is already kind of long and rambling.

Post: #10

(11-15-2018 06:22 PM)lonewolf1992 Wrote:  Hi guys, wanted to thank you all for the advice. At first I decided to go for one single call and it worked out smoothly. She told me like: 'Too bad you have the flu as I don't want you to infect me once I'm back' That's a rough translation. However, she returned and she's quite cold and distant, I asked her out and she told me she was 'busy' so she would let me know.

One of my best friend's theories is that she got fucked so hard by some other dude that she doesn't want to hang out with me anymore, he told me I should have tried to go for the kill in the first date. I think I'm leaning towards this possibility. Don't shit where you eat! Will try to apply that! Thanks a lot gentlemen, Lesson learned, Moving on.

She just had a surgery to remove an ovarian cyst and you think she's being boned hard by someone? I can guarantee you that the last thing she is thinking about is sex after that surgery, especially to remove an ovarian cyst. Now she probably had some dude running some comfort game on her which is what she was looking for after a surgery. My guess is that you were more worried about getting laid while her mind was on her surgery and she picked that up. Clearly you lost your opportunity the first night and acted thirsty after that while she mentally had moved on to worrying about her surgery. If you had done more with her the first night thus removing your thirst and then helped her deal with the upcoming surgery, you'd likely be in a better spot with this chick. Not sure which handbook recommends ignoring human considerations in the game but it seems clear to me that this is what happened here.

Post: #11

I think you're good OP, if you still feel like going after this girl you need to work on rebuilding rapport you've lost since she was gone, but be careful to not come on in a way that is too familiar.

You said previously she made it clear that she told you she didn't want a relationship or anything like that... Try and get her out for drinks or something and don't bring up her surgery and personal life as a means of conversation.

You want to keep a dominant frame with her with sexual tension and trying to act like a comforting friend to her conflicts with that.

Keep everything light and fun. You want to be the guy that she sees as a break in routine, a reliable way to get some fun and excitement in her life.