Post: #1

I wrote a similar post some time ago about being afraid to start dating because I was afraid I would get obsessed again. I also don't want to waste any more time, as that was all I did in my 20s. I squandered so much of that decade as a pathetic gameless alcoholic, and want to dedicate much more of my free time to relaxing and pursuing hobbies I never got around to.

I don't have a whole lot of patience for empty social calls or nightgame anymore - the other week I was out in the club with roommates, and instead of getting excited to hit on sluts, I found myself wondering what I could be reading or working on back at home if I was sober and hadn't been dragged out half-willingly.

Casual sex, sure, but it's SO damn much work to get it, and it's going to usually be with women I don't actually want to date.

Problem is, at some point I need to set aside the time to date...I'm not going to get better at dating by staying on a permanent hiatus. How much time am I going to be spending on this, minimum?

I could stand to lose a few hobbies, really...I am interested in so many things, it often seems like I am even busier on my off-days.

Post: #2

If going out sober works for you, that could be a solution. You essentially get to go out, game, get numbers and dates, without the drawbacks of being drunk. Yes, you'll experience some fatigue the next day, but your performance level won't drop as badly as it would after drinking. If you can fit in 30 minute afternoon nap to recover, you should be fine

Post: #3

Game is time consuming and if you're focusing solely on the outcome it's a gigantic waste of time. You simply get way less than what you invest. That's why it's important to genuinely enjoy the process of flirting, socializing, being playful etc.

To me, it sounds like you have other things going on right now which mean more to you. Nothing wrong with that. Do what you feel like doing at each moment because it's never coming back. My opinion.

Post: #4

(08-22-2018 12:06 AM)stugatz Wrote:  I wrote a similar post some time ago about being afraid to start dating because I was afraid I would get obsessed again. I also don't want to waste any more time, as that was all I did in my 20s. I squandered so much of that decade as a pathetic gameless alcoholic, and want to dedicate much more of my free time to relaxing and pursuing hobbies I never got around to.

Good, you realized your issues, and you realize what's more important in your life.

You're right, guys get so deep into game that they become obsessed and then burn out or have game fatigue.

I should know, the last few years I've been chasing pussy like it's a sprint.

No matter what, TIME will always be more than important that anything else. Use it wisely, on things you want to do, who gives a fuck what anyone else thinks.

Chill out, pursue your hobbies, travel by yourself.

Quote:I don't have a whole lot of patience for empty social calls or nightgame anymore - the other week I was out in the club with roommates, and instead of getting excited to hit on sluts, I found myself wondering what I could be reading or working on back at home if I was sober and hadn't been dragged out half-willingly.

Social calls are definitely my thing, but night club game isn't, it just isn't fun to me anymore, I've been there, done that.

It's expensive, it's time consuming, it's loud as fuck, it gets old. I get it man. I only go to clubs for specific things like birthdays or bachelor parties, hell even strip clubs I don't get lap dances or watch, I'm paying for friends to get lap dances or I'm at the bar fucking with strippers because they know I'm not a mark they'll get money out of.

Quote:Casual sex, sure, but it's SO damn much work to get it, and it's going to usually be with women I don't actually want to date.

That all depends on the level of your game, some guys have it easy with ONS, some guys gotta put in work, some guys are better at spinning plates short/long term, some guys find quality in LTR material.

In the end you decide what you want.

Quote:Problem is, at some point I need to set aside the time to date...I'm not going to get better at dating by staying on a permanent hiatus. How much time am I going to be spending on this, minimum?

Sniper Game.

Be picky as fuck with girls you meet, game, or match online with.

The easiest approach with online with Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge.

Dating apps are less time consuming than going out and gaming girls, but be warned, you DON'T want to lose your edge gaming in real life.

Social Circle game can be easy with friends of friends.

Quote:I could stand to lose a few hobbies, really...I am interested in so many things, it often seems like I am even busier on my off-days.

Personally I wouldn't give up my hobbies, that's your happiness and self health right there. Especially if your hobbies are productive and meaningful.

Post: #5

If it's not fun, why do it?

Post: #6

Sounds like you never learned any actual (night) game so you're not getting any results and it feels like a waste of time.

If you're wondering what you could be reading while out at a club it means you never enter the social state of mind that allows you to get out of your head and have fun.

Learn night game and you will feel differently.

Post: #7

Lol I feel the same way. Now I spend 90 percent of that time focus on sport and chasing money

Post: #8

(08-22-2018 05:02 PM)tr1cky Wrote:  Sounds like you never learned any actual (night) game so you're not getting any results and it feels like a waste of time.

If you're wondering what you could be reading while out at a club it means you never enter the social state of mind that allows you to get out of your head and have fun.

Learn night game and you will feel differently.

How do you have fun gaming in bars/clubs?

I know this is an awkward question. I'd like to learn to be social, but I cannot seem to enjoy myself if I'm not participating in some shared goal during my socializing (games/sports/activities). I sort of feel the way the OP does, although I have just started.