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Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
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bigolteddies Offline
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Post: #1
Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
What's the general consensus on this. In Roosh's book Bang, he suggests a call to ask a girl out on a first date. When she doesn't answer, he leaves a short message saying to call him back. If the girl doesn't call back within 3 hours she's usually gone.

Is this still what guys are doing because I know the book was written a while ago. Being in college, I get the vibe that a lot of these girls will get scared away if I come on that strong calling them after getting their number.

On the other hand, the problem with texting is that girls have complete control over it. The amount of flakes I experience from getting the number to texting to try and set up a date is very high.

I was thinking of, after sending my name, to send a convo starter text like "describe to me your day using emojis" and then after exchanging a few messages call her that night.

Thoughts?
11-05-2017 05:01 PM
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Post: #2
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
Would like to see this more on this topic.

I used to text, "Hey. I wanted to talk to you on the phone for about five minutes sometime so we don't hate each other immediately."
Along those lines, seems to work and got several bangs from that first text.

If a girl doesn't text you back to your message, I would think that she wasn't really interested in the first place.

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
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(This post was last modified: 11-05-2017 08:50 PM by bgbusiness.)
11-05-2017 08:50 PM
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Hazaer Offline
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RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
(11-05-2017 08:50 PM)bgbusiness Wrote:  I used to text, "Hey. I wanted to talk to you on the phone for about five minutes sometime so we don't hate each other immediately."

Would you expect her to call you after this text?
11-05-2017 09:29 PM
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RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
(11-05-2017 09:29 PM)Hazaer Wrote:  
(11-05-2017 08:50 PM)bgbusiness Wrote:  I used to text, "Hey. I wanted to talk to you on the phone for about five minutes sometime so we don't hate each other immediately."

Would you expect her to call you after this text?

(11-05-2017 08:50 PM)bgbusiness Wrote:  Along those lines, seems to work and got several bangs from that first text.

If you are THAT too scared to lose the girl, but you want time on the phone, then just text her this, no need to get sissy.
"Hey, wanted to talk on the phone just for few moments, I am not really into texting."

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
- Heat

"That's the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big."
(This post was last modified: 11-05-2017 09:34 PM by bgbusiness.)
11-05-2017 09:31 PM
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Mountain Man Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
Call her. I'm sure you sent your name after getting her number so if she answers then you know that she saved it and is into you. Or, if she calls back quickly after hearing your message you know that she is into you. Many girls don't even set up their voicemail or it is full so you'll end up sending a text anyways.

Calling a girl is something that most other people won't do so you'll stand out. As suggested above it also gives you the opportunity to let her know up front that you do not have textversations.

I think the call before the text is ballsy so that's why I do it but sending out a few texts and then going for the call sounds ok too.

Best practice: Try both!! Keep track of your results and share them here!!
11-05-2017 10:10 PM
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bigolteddies Offline
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RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
(11-05-2017 10:10 PM)Mountain Man Wrote:  Call her. I'm sure you sent your name after getting her number so if she answers then you know that she saved it and is into you. Or, if she calls back quickly after hearing your message you know that she is into you. Many girls don't even set up their voicemail or it is full so you'll end up sending a text anyways.

Calling a girl is something that most other people won't do so you'll stand out. As suggested above it also gives you the opportunity to let her know up front that you do not have textversations.

I think the call before the text is ballsy so that's why I do it but sending out a few texts and then going for the call sounds ok too.

Best practice: Try both!! Keep track of your results and share them here!!

Usually I ask out through text but like I said, I feel it gives girls less of a commitment to go through with the date. So I called this new prospect that I met at the bar on Friday night. She didn't answer (no surprise there) so I shot her a text saying "Hey call me back when you got a chance"

She replies pretty quickly saying: Im watching netflix with friends whats up

Sounded like she was trying to get some power over me by instead of calling me back, asking why I was calling so I replied

Nm, I think I found the cure to cancer and needed to tell someone so call me when youre free

She left me on read. I would assume that if she refuses to call back then I would've wasted even more time trying to text back and forth to set something up, so this could be a good way of screening.
11-06-2017 12:23 AM
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Post: #7
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
I'd text. Most girls are really fucking awkward on the phone and so are most guys. You can call and build up that strength but I feel like the road to being good on the phone is long and awkward.
11-06-2017 01:04 AM
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Post: #8
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
This might be an age thing, but I would never consider texting to ask a woman out, I would always ring.

I guess for younger women the rules have all changed now.

If you are gaming a woman over thirty, I'd suggest always calling her.
11-06-2017 03:15 AM
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Post: #9
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
I used to phone, but these days girls are much more uncomfortable on the phone and won't answer. Texting seems weak and is an effort though, and so I've been leaving Whatsapp voice messages recently and it's been working great for me - they seem to like the novelty of it.
11-06-2017 02:32 PM
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bigolteddies Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
It seems like it's pretty dependent on the girls age alongside a bunch of other factors. It'd be nice if there was a perfect solution though.
11-06-2017 03:47 PM
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RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
(11-06-2017 02:32 PM)Kieran Wrote:  I used to phone, but these days girls are much more uncomfortable on the phone and won't answer. Texting seems weak and is an effort though, and so I've been leaving Whatsapp voice messages recently and it's been working great for me - they seem to like the novelty of it.

That's a nice interesting gambit..

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06-04-2018 07:50 AM
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RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
Some girls do not like texting and will refer you to call (their way of seeing if you are a player). Shit girls are starting to get so jealous and insecure that they want to video chat face to face technology. I prefer texting so investment is minimized for the plate. Once you run a flock voice calls and FaceTime is my enemy unless I have free time.
06-17-2018 10:42 PM
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Post: #13
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
I just say "I'm going to call you" after a an hour or so of texting. Damn near 100% of women that don't freak out and say "no!" I have banged. And damn near 80% of women that freak out have not progressed into bangs. I'm pretty good on the phone, and know how to build comfort and get things moving from there. It also helps me screen and verify identity. Also shitty and raspy or masculine voices are a huge turn off.

Increasingly I'm running into girls that are just not comfortable speaking on the phone which I find pretty odd in itself but it makes sense with everyone growing up texting and getting less and less verbal communication than before. It's a shame because verbal communication skills are something women in general are better at than men, but I can see that might be going downhill.

Also phone etiquette is a big tell for me. If someone is rude over the phone - IE pauses to talk to someone else (at all, especially without saying anything) - hangs up without niceties - etc there's a damn good chance she's an inconsiderate bitch. And I find that attitude in people but especially potential bangs or women I will be spending a decent amount of time with repulsive and intolerable
06-18-2018 02:26 AM
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RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
(11-06-2017 02:32 PM)Kieran Wrote:  I used to phone, but these days girls are much more uncomfortable on the phone and won't answer. Texting seems weak and is an effort though, and so I've been leaving Whatsapp voice messages recently and it's been working great for me - they seem to like the novelty of it.

Messaging over whatsapp expands possibilities and shows creativity - texting, voice messaging, pictures, gifs, emojis and... calls. It also allows you to think through and craft the best answer to move your plan forward. Personally, I don't call in the early stages.

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06-18-2018 05:14 AM
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Post: #15
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
Calling a college chick might scare her off. Those girls don't use their phones for making calls (except maybe to her parents), but instead scrolling through various apps. Texting would be the best approach. Exchange some banter, but don't let it drag out. Feel free to sprinkle in whatever jokes, emojis, pictures you want, but Always Be Closing.
06-18-2018 09:16 PM
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Post: #16
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
I would have said call chicks 5 years ago (I'm 35). Today if the girl is under 30, I would say def. no phone calls. It's like a foreign concept to the Gen Z/younger millennial crowd. You can call her after you have a date or two.
06-21-2018 12:15 AM
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tugofpeace Offline
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Post: #17
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
I'm a guy who is incredibly nervous around women, didn't have the balls to ever approach, etc. But that's due to excessive fapping/anxiety.

That being said, I called every single one of my tinder dates before meeting up. No lie, the first time I did this I felt like I was about to have a heart attack.

Second, third, fourth time I did it, I rehearsed my general plan of conversation several times, and improvised once they picked up. I think that if you call without a plan, you're going to look like an idiot. The hardest part is the first 10-15 seconds of the call, after that my anxiety fades away and I become purely present. I think that's the case with anything, really, I just enter a flow state once the initial shock factor fades away.

Every single girl who I called was on time for the date, and was ready to bang. My conversations over the phone weren't even particularly witty or fun either, they were just straight up feeling her out over the phone and setting up a time for the date. I think most women these days aren't used to that at all. Calling shows that you're honest/sincere, and also that you're fearless because you're willing to risk fucking up the conversation. It's bold, and all women love it, IMO. Even if they're nervous as shit.
07-30-2018 12:18 PM
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Post: #18
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
I do both depending upon the girl’s age and where we met. If it’s a random meeting with number I’ll likely text. If I was introduced, met her at a party with some conversation, or through a mutual activity like sports then I will call. Calling shows you’re being intentional about meeting. Texting shows you are approaching it with minimal pressure.

The only time I always text is with chicks who don’t speak English so well. I’ve been hooking up with South Americans more lately and they are reluctant to talk by phone. When I get them out by text I can build comfort with google translate - don’t underestimate their desire to meet an English speaking American whose very thoughts are mysterious.

Google Translate text game works.
07-30-2018 05:55 PM
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Post: #19
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
Officially "asking someone out" via text or phone call shows you care and take them seriously.

Taking women seriously or caring about whether they go out with you not is lame.

If the people asking for advice could at least pretend not to care there would not be so many newbie questions.

"Ask them out" in the most casual, laziest and careless way possible.

Make sure it's to somewhere where you're going to be anyway so you don't even have to bother to check whether they're going to show up or not. And if they don't show up, don't even mention it to her, unless it's to take the piss out of her.

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07-30-2018 07:28 PM
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Dragon92 Offline
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Post: #20
RE: Texting vs Calling for asking a girl out?
Honestly, i prefer to call for the first date, because it's more spontaneously. You can see her reactions very easy when you hear her voice. For me, texting is a waste of time and it fells like playng chess with her.

Also, i am avoiding using social media before the first date.
07-31-2018 10:44 AM
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