Post: #1

12:30 "I get off work around 5:30. We could meet somewhere for a drink."

I sit back for a second and some doubt hits me. This girl's been actin' kinda flakey. Her responses have been very delayed. She didn't pick up the phone when I called yesterday. I doubt I want to even commit to a date at this point. I know this will lead nowhere. I say nothing.

6:12 "No beer?"

Well, looks like I got some obvious sign of interest. I got nothing better to do. Might as well give it a shot: "I just got dinner out. Let's meet at [a bar near me] at 7."

6:30 "Sounds fun see you there."

6:52 "Shoot. Something came up. I can't make it."
"What came up?"

7:19 "My sister. Sorry!"
"What happened to her?"

8:45 Still no response.

*****************************************************

After only two years pursuing women on the regular I have finally come to the point where I totally don't give a shit.

As of late I really haven't been putting much effort into meeting women. The "reward" of having sex with a desirable woman simply isn't enough anymore to put up with the stupid bullshit required to get it. Don't get me wrong. I still desire sex and intimacy. I would like to have a steady girlfriend some day and I would like to start a family with a woman I love. But the thought of talking to the women I meet on a regular basis is so repugnant to me that I think I prefer jerking off to going on a date with them. In fact, I think I would reject them even if they offered sex freely. It's gotten that bad.

My experiences with these women are far from unique. I think I have simply gained enough of these shitty experiences that I have come to expect them:

I expect a woman to flake on me for no reason despite her "obvious" interest.

I expect a woman to look at me as a potential rapist when I approach her in public.

I expect a woman to not respond for hours when I text her a simple question.

I expect a woman to fuck a tattooed asshole who hands her a beer rather than date a well-groomed gentleman trying to hand her flowers.

I expect a woman to attempt to hurt me emotionally if I call her out on any of her bullshit.

I have finally come to expect women to treat me as if I have no value.

This is something that I hate to write. It is something I hate to read. But it is what the experience I have had leads me to expect and there's no escaping it. I am sure that there are good women in the world. There must be. But it has become quite clear to me that they are in the minority in my experience and I must think and act accordingly.

With all of this experience there comes, of course, a lesson. The lesson I have finally learned is to trust my intuition and acknowledge these past experiences.

I once had the habit of viewing modern women as "the fairer sex". I used to believe that women were compassionate, trusting, nurturing, understanding individuals. I thought they were on the whole "better" than us in these ways. I used to give women the benefit of the doubt and tried to be "understanding" of women's shitty behavior towards me.

Perhaps the last flake was the flake that broke me. I am not pushing intuition to the side any longer.

This is the lesson that I know all men must learn if they are to be successful with women or anything at all. You must learn to expect the worst and trust their inner voice.

You know when a woman's a flake.

You know when she's bat-shit crazy.

You know she's treating you like you're a nobody.

You know she's milking you for attention and you know she's not going to put out for you.

You know she's looking at other men and not at you.

You know. And you must act on that knowledge.

I want you, dear reader, to learn easily what I have had to learn through a good deal of difficulty. When you find yourself in a situation where a woman is causing you distress, I want you to listen to yourself. I want you to listen to the voice that you often silence but is the voice that has your best interest in mind.

Acknowledge the reality of your situation, listen to yourself, and do what you need to do.

Post: #2

Well stated. Look's like you've finally digested that red pill.

Post: #3

Yeah. The game can really be stressful at times. Life's a bitch and then you die.


Just develop your own style of game that is minimal effort, so you won't be as stressed out. Minimal effort game is the way to go.

(And yes... before anyone says otherwise... this means you should still find ways to approach!)

Post: #4

I am shaken.

It is a ruthless, ruthless world out there.

I'm thinking of saving your post here on my laptop, if I ever forget these basic truths many of us tend to pass by.

Geez...

Post: #5

I dont know man. It just sounds bitter.

Not caring just looks a bit different to me. Its indifference. More like a shoulder shrug, followed by watching a bootleg movie or netflix.

Post: #6

Play the game how it goes, don't let it play you.

Post: #7

(08-31-2011 02:14 AM)ea303 Wrote:  I dont know man. It just sounds bitter.

Shaming language.

Bitterness is irrational. Realism is not.

Post: #8

My friends wives and/or their girlfriends have flat out told me all of this about other women. I still go into every situation thinking it's going to be different. It never is. Every time it happens, it chips away at my soul and I move on.

Post: #9

Golden Unbreakable Rule - Never deviate from YOUR normal day to meet a chick.

Go about your day and invite people into the path of YOUR day.

Post: #10

Learning about this stuff makes you act like you expect to be treated that way, and that is what sometimes happens.

I think the most successful guys look at things more optimistically but know what might happen. I'm not saying you're bitter but when I was thinking about this crap all the time I acted like that and it pushes women away.

I would of ended the convo by not responding after she said, "Shoot. Something came up. I can't make it."

She didn't give a reason until you asked for it and she didn't offer to reschedule.

Post: #11

EXACTLY why I don't bother much nowadays.

It gets to the point where NET BENEFITS < COSTS.

And by 'costs' I mean putting up with the shit etc. I only do it now when it's a near guarantee. Why bother with phone numbers. Conversion rates are horrible. Go straight for the kill or forget it.

Whereabouts are you based?

Post: #12

Very well stated OP. May I ask how old was this girl? I recently watched a friend go through something very similar with a VERY attractive 21 year old.

I feel like I am starting to understand what most of the older guys say here (as I quickly become one). Girls typically date up in age range. At 21 and trying to lock down a 21 HB, seems tough. There are just too many distractions.

Post: #13

As callous and cynical as it may sound,you must stop caring for these hoes-I can't stress that enough. Look where its gotten you: disappointment,embarrassment and blue balls. When women know you truly don't give a fuck they actually drop all the bullshit.
As an experiment block this bitches number. Don't answer her texts and mention to a friend or acquaintance how you can't stand time wasters-a female friend will be sure to inform her. Swing by a place you know she frequents and ignore her totally,preferably in front of her friends. Tell us how it goes down.
He's not bitter ea303 ,just seeing the true picture-a caring sensitive guy is the loser. Its true what athlone says-shaming language isn't appreciated in here;let leave it for the bitches.

Post: #14

(08-31-2011 10:36 AM)afronoob Wrote:  As callous and cynical as it may sound,you must stop caring for these hoes-I can't stress that enough. Look where its gotten you: disappointment,embarrassment and blue balls. When women know you truly don't give a fuck they actually drop all the bullshit.
As an experiment block this bitches number. Don't answer her texts and mention to a friend or acquaintance how you can't stand time wasters-a female friend will be sure to inform her. Swing by a place you know she frequents and ignore her totally,preferably in front of her friends. Tell us how it goes down.
He's not bitter ea303 ,just seeing the true picture-a caring sensitive guy is the loser. Its true what athlone says-shaming language isn't appreciated in here;let leave it for the bitches.

I agree with this. Also, try and game another lizard in front of this one if possible. The ultimate diss to a lizard is to try and hit on another one in her presence.
That will really shine the lights in her reptilian iris and cause her to scarper for the rocks.
The power surge from this is unbelievable.

It's difficult I know. I used to catch feelings but these days I am really tending not to give a shyt, I'll nut in a lizard and call another one with skipping a heartbeat.

Post: #15

(08-31-2011 10:46 AM)Moma Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 10:36 AM)afronoob Wrote:  As callous and cynical as it may sound,you must stop caring for these hoes-I can't stress that enough. Look where its gotten you: disappointment,embarrassment and blue balls. When women know you truly don't give a fuck they actually drop all the bullshit.
As an experiment block this bitches number. Don't answer her texts and mention to a friend or acquaintance how you can't stand time wasters-a female friend will be sure to inform her. Swing by a place you know she frequents and ignore her totally,preferably in front of her friends. Tell us how it goes down.
He's not bitter ea303 ,just seeing the true picture-a caring sensitive guy is the loser. Its true what athlone says-shaming language isn't appreciated in here;let leave it for the bitches.

I agree with this. Also, try and game another lizard in front of this one if possible. The ultimate diss to a lizard is to try and hit on another one in her presence.
That will really shine the lights in her reptilian iris and cause her to scarper for the rocks.
The power surge from this is unbelievable.

It's difficult I know. I used to catch feelings but these days I am really tending not to give a shyt, I'll nut in a lizard and call another one with skipping a heartbeat.

I agree also. Don't give a fuck! When I say this I mean don't try make it look like you don't. Just don't. Its a jedi mindfuck to grasp but you can do it.
I will be out with a girl and she will have to find me grinding on a lizard on the dance floor.
Do you think she's going to leave? If she does she WILL be calling you or riding by your place later looking for cars in the driveway.
Don't ever give up. Get on the grind! See a girl pumping gas while driving?
Guess what? Pull in and stick that pump in your tank right next to her and start talking.
I do this without even putting gas in my car.
Gather numbers and don't worry...It will come.
When you have enough steady bangs in the rotation guess what??
Upgrade upgrade upgrade...Meanwhile you never stop hitting the gas pumps etc...NEVER NEVER stop!!

Post: #16

(08-31-2011 02:14 AM)ea303 Wrote:  I dont know man. It just sounds bitter. Not caring just looks a bit different to me. Its indifference. More like a shoulder shrug, followed by watching a bootleg movie or netflix.

I understand your perspective. I would have thought the same thing not too long ago. I think you're touching on a fear that I once had, one that I think I've finally let go of. I used to be afraid of absorbing negative realities. I didn't want to appear bitter or cynical. I didn't want to adjust my thinking and behavior to one that would function well in the narcissistic culture that we have today.

I haven't become bitter. A bitter man is a man who has given up. He's been burned too many times and he's sworn off women forever. They're ALL bad. I know a divorced guy like this. I haven't gotten to that point. I'm still optimistic that I'll find a woman I'll be compatible with one day. I'm hopeful that I'll have a diverse amount of sexual experiences until that happens.

I have not given up, I've changed. That's the difference between a man who's learned and a man who's been burned.

Post: #17

(08-31-2011 04:25 AM)silent_scope Wrote:  My friends wives and/or their girlfriends have flat out told me all of this about other women. I still go into every situation thinking it's going to be different. It never is. Every time it happens, it chips away at my soul and I move on.

Don't just move on. Learn from the situation and adapt your thinking and behavior. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.

(08-31-2011 06:14 AM)Lumiere Wrote:  Golden Unbreakable Rule - Never deviate from YOUR normal day to meet a chick. Go about your day and invite people into the path of YOUR day.

Very interesting thought. I think I'll post about this in a bit.

(08-31-2011 06:49 AM)wolf Wrote:  I'm not saying you're bitter but when I was thinking about this crap all the time I acted like that and it pushes women away.

I am a little concerned about this and I appreciate your advice on this. I know a lot of women treat me as if I'm the last asshole that burned them. It's frustrating. The line between preparedness and paranoia is a fine one. I'll have to walk it with care.

(08-31-2011 06:49 AM)wolf Wrote:  I would of ended the convo by not responding after she said, "Shoot. Something came up. I can't make it."

I knew it was all over. I just wanted to see what she'd say. Sometimes I like to prod a little to find out how uncaring some of these girls can be. It kind of solidifies the lesson for me each time.

(08-31-2011 08:37 AM)amistod Wrote:  Very well stated OP. May I ask how old was this girl? I recently watched a friend go through something very similar with a VERY attractive 21 year old.

I'm 28. I'm not sure how old she was. Probably mid-twenties or so. She really wasn't that good-looking either.

(08-31-2011 10:36 AM)afronoob Wrote:  Swing by a place you know she frequents and ignore her totally,preferably in front of her friends. Tell us how it goes down.

I don't know anything about her. Honestly, I wouldn't even make the effort if I did. I think that'd be placing some value on her perception of me.

(08-31-2011 11:05 AM)el mechanico Wrote:  See a girl pumping gas while driving? Guess what? Pull in and stick that pump in your tank right next to her and start talking. I do this without even putting gas in my car.

Haha. Awesome tactic. Never thought about doing something like that.[/quote]

(08-31-2011 11:05 AM)el mechanico Wrote:  When you have enough steady bangs in the rotation guess what?? Upgrade upgrade upgrade...

This has become my new philosophy. Gotta get a rotation though. I might write about this sometime soon.

Post: #18

I stick by my comments. I feel like you guys are trying to shame me into your thinking about the issue . I recommend checking out the book Roosh recommends, its quite good. To Be or Not Be Intimidated.

See Amazon / Roosh for a Review.

I am 20 pages in and at the part where it says you should assume things wont work out for reasons outside of your control, and you shouldnt let it affect your mindset. Based on your prior post though, it seems like you are on your way in terms of observing negative realities though.

As I said, this one action by some random bitch who you dont even know has dramatically affected you. Its really not worth it inmo. Just a bitch, more will some, some will close, some will not, some will flake. Its just life, an uncomfortable and unnecessary part of life, but part indeed. Also I am probably the most realist person I know. A realist would have slightly expected a flake and wouldnt have cared outside of the fact that perhaps he ironed a shirt for nothing....

INMO you have to deal with the world as it is, not as you want it to be. Your post touches on that and its a step in the right direction. I say bitter because you sound like the male version of a female who has been ran through in her 20s and now thinks all man are dogs or all men suck.

Its her reality, but just her reality, and she sounds bitter to a normal well adjusted man. You dont want to have a fucked up view of these things because as someone else said it will just push away normal none flakey women. Its a tough tight rope to cross, cynical vs realist vs bitter vs optimist who is let down by the world.

True indifference is indifference. Get options then upgrade if something doesnt come through you have something to fall back on, even if its just spending time with yourself working on a project, or hobby.

Post: #19

(08-31-2011 06:14 AM)Lumiere Wrote:  Golden Unbreakable Rule - Never deviate from YOUR normal day to meet a chick.

Go about your day and invite people into the path of YOUR day.

This is a fcuking gem concept!

Post: #20

(08-31-2011 12:29 PM)Moma Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 06:14 AM)Lumiere Wrote:  Golden Unbreakable Rule - Never deviate from YOUR normal day to meet a chick.

Go about your day and invite people into the path of YOUR day.

This is a fcuking gem concept!

How so? I will switch grocery stores if there's no women inside.

If I wanted to watch a ball game at the bar and it was a complete sausage fest, I would leave.
When I fish I won't go far offshore because there's no bikinis riding by.

Chasing pussy is my normal day I guess?

Post: #21

(08-31-2011 12:37 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 12:29 PM)Moma Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 06:14 AM)Lumiere Wrote:  Golden Unbreakable Rule - Never deviate from YOUR normal day to meet a chick.

Go about your day and invite people into the path of YOUR day.

This is a fcuking gem concept!

How so? I will switch grocery stores if there's no women inside.

If I wanted to watch a ball game at the bar and it was a complete sausage fest, I would leave.
When I fish I won't go far offshore because there's no bikinis riding by.

Chasing pussy is my normal day I guess?

I'm with you mechanico. I'll never understand these guys who say "Don't focus on women at all, just on yourself!" anymore than I'll understand the guys who say "Don't focus on yourself, just improve your game!"

Post: #22

El mechanico, well your city is easier. I've been to Florida (I have peeps there, remember?) and getting pussy is practically a cakewalk.

Other cities where the flake level is sky high (i.e. Toronto), one has to take shyt in stride or get stomped out.

So for the less sturdy cats in here, I think that's a great comment.

For the seasoned vets such as yourself, Mixx, G, Roosh and so on, you don't need to adhere to such fundamentals.

I live near downtown so I literally invite lizards over to a spot near me. When they call me and let me know they are there, then I get up and go and meet them.
If they no show, I am at home anyways.

For instance, I had a lizard promise to come over to mine yesterday. I have to beta her (which means texting *sorry G manifesto*). She is not good on the phone (doesn't respond much to phone calls) and I am certain she is clutching other dycks on the side.

I sent her a reminder text on Monday. No response.

Yesterday evening in the comfort of my place, I sent out another one asking her where she is at. No reply.

No sweat because it was in the stride of what I do anyway.

Does that somewhat make sense?

Post: #23

I've never heard of member ea303 who posted above. I notice he is new. However, he makes a lot of sense.

Then again, sense is the last thing you should try to have to fuck women or you'll go insano hermano!


Mixx

Post: #24

(08-31-2011 12:41 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 12:37 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 12:29 PM)Moma Wrote:  

(08-31-2011 06:14 AM)Lumiere Wrote:  Golden Unbreakable Rule - Never deviate from YOUR normal day to meet a chick.

Go about your day and invite people into the path of YOUR day.

This is a fcuking gem concept!

How so? I will switch grocery stores if there's no women inside.

If I wanted to watch a ball game at the bar and it was a complete sausage fest, I would leave.
When I fish I won't go far offshore because there's no bikinis riding by.

Chasing pussy is my normal day I guess?

I'm with you mechanico. I'll never understand these guys who say "Don't focus on women at all, just on yourself!" anymore than I'll understand the guys who say "Don't focus on yourself, just improve your game!"

I agree. I choose where I sit on a train based on where the girls are. I go out of my way all the time to chase pussy.

The difference is when making plans for a first or second date. I'll make plans around where's convenient for me and where the logistics are good. And if she flakes I'll just go out on the prowl by myself so it's no big deal.

Also helps to frame it this way when asking girls to come out : "I was going to ... Why don't you join?"

Post: #25

Definitely know where you are coming from CupCake. There's a tension between how nice guys wish girls behaved and how they actually do. It used to bother me when girls would date jerks, or when I got tossed in the friend zone, or when a girl flaked for no good reason. I held it against those girls, and I got frustrated.

But lowering expectations, and seeing girls for how they actually are has been a blessing, and cleared a lot of cobwebs out of my brain. I am not swimming against the tide and almost drowning, I am floating along the with current like I am rafting on a lazy river.
I am not beating my head against a wall wondering why girls don't respond the way I would prefer them to, I am enjoying them for what they are without expecting them to conform to any beta fantasies I may have lingering in the back of my mind. And it's funny: when you can see most girls as the lying, annoying bitches they usually are, you get better at finding the ones who really are gems. You don't spend as much time chasing false leads with betaness blinding you to a girl's real nature. You can become more objective when a pedestal has to be earned instead of freely given to any hot girl giving you attention. You can be choosy, because you have more options.

It does suck to be spitting game at the bunch of shrews you describe in the original post. Considered a trip abroad? Or to a more well-adjusted part of the country where women are less cunty? It could take some of the edge off.