Post: #1

Hi guys

some views would be appreciated here.

If you start with an opener and then ask 2 or 3 questions but you don't get very much to go on back.

eg.
in a line at Walmart
A cute girl is buying a flag
"are you patriotic or do you just like flag?" -
"I'm patriotic and I like the flag"
"Really, well where are you going to put it?"
"I'm going to wear it at a party"
"Like you're going to tape it to yourself?"
"yes".
and then I couldn't think of anything else to say. I felt to then come in with a signifier of interest would have been awkward. Maybe I could have gone sexual with a "is that all you're going to be wearing..." hrm - but could have come across as sleazy. Could I have gone on? WOuld a sexual remark been appropriate but i didn't have the balls to do it? Should I have gone for values/ethics?

I think I might have been able to go on askign questions or maybe with something a bit funny.

My internal voice is saying ":she's got a boyfriend... she's just putting up with you... she's just talking to you out of politeness...". I felt pretty exposed. Maybe that is all my internal limitation. I think thats my primary self-limiter from some left over low self-esteem.

Would you recommend sitting in there regardless of you usual intuition and keeping going till she tells you to leave or leaves herself? Have you had any problems with premature ejection? I struggle with knowing when to call it quits and be cool and just hanging in there and taking the awkwardness.

Now I don't like patriotism too much, especially if its nationalistic kind, so she kind of wasn't the type of girl I would usually date - not liberal enough - but hell, thats not good enough for me to stop.



Any tips of persistence? personal stories?

Post: #2

Confidence

Post: #3

You asked too many questions in succession instead of rambling on in between with random opinions or observations. This lends to a one-sided conversation and makes the girl feel like you are trying to pick her up, instead of just two people having a chat.