Post: #1

So, I can't exactly put my finger on it, but something about this article written by a woman about her husband rubs me the wrong way.

Can anyone help me crystalize my nebulous feelings of irritation?

https://medium.com/keep-learning-keep-gr...12c93c92fa

"I’m not glad Steve died, not even a little. He has missed SO MUCH COOL SHIT. He missed the opening with Cuba, which he would have been really stoked about. He’s missing an equality revolution in spaces around gender and sexual identity, race, police power, capital, and class."

Ah. Poor Steve. At least he is at peace now.

Post: #2

She's attention whoring, by using her husband's death, and subtly implying she's on the market again.

Post: #3

She does come across as very self-centred, and she makes widowhood sound like a bad hair day. A more doting wife would have focused on her husband's good qualities and talked less about herself.

Post: #4

It's not so much "attention-whoring" because there have been great works of art dedicated to people who have died or about the subject of death. I don't even mind that she made it all about herself, because most musings on death have more to do with the people left behind than the ones who died.

The problem with this article is the tone. It doesn't fit the subject. It comes across as off-handed and casual, as if she's writing about going to a fair or refrigerator shopping, not the death of a loved one.

It's as if you wrote a song about death, but instead of making it somber and sad, you set it to jaunty carnival music. Imagine "Fire and Rain" by James Taylor (a song inspired by a friend who died), but set to the music of Ke$ha's "Tik Tok" or P!nk's "Get the Party Started." That's this article.

She's making death seem like an annoyance or inconvenience more than a life-altering, soul-crushing experience. It's sitcom-minded writing. My own writing on this forum about my wife merely leaving has more gravity.

Here is an example of what put you off. This contrived exchange comes off like a shallow middle schooler's writing:

Q: What have you learned over the past two years?
A: Hoo boy. HOO BOY. HUUUUUOOOOOOOHHHHHHH BOOOOOOOOOY.

What really troubles me are the responses to this essay. Example: "I have nothing substantial to offer on this subject but good grief you are a brilliant writer."

This makes me think that as a society, we're changing. We no longer know good from bad writing.

One reason for that, I think, is Facebook. We have become "Face-phonies," who are more into image-mongering and showing off than being real.

Another reason is our schools no longer teach properly, since it's become a feel-good female culture that's more about validation than learning. The female writer of this article probably got nothing but praise from her female teachers for whatever she wrote.

If this is what passes for good writing, I'm very happy I left the field.