Listen. Don't talk to me like I'm some kinda fuckin' chump.
Alright?
Because I'm not.
I'm a businessman.
I'm a family man.
Man of the people.
Man of the church.
Man of the country.
I'm a patriot.
A veteran.
A man of god.
A missionary.
A postman.
I work at jamba juice, okay?
My dog is spayed.
I got letters ready for me at the notary republic.
I know a cobbler
I make my own quilts
Love eggs.
Shop locally.
I support local causes.
I take a cruise ship every 3 months.
I wear reading glasses.
My daughter has braces.
My eyebrows are shaved
And my friends are all geese.
I live in a house.
I have a head.
My clothes are all combustible.
My medicine is over the counter except for one prescription.
I have a shirt that reads "If you don't like me, I'll go fuck your mother."
I am inside of the matrix.
I live in a home with no windows.
I have lasers inside my brain
I have a shark in my bathroom.
My dog sleeps in my bed with me.
I have mouse under the rug.
My friends are all dead.
I went to india once.
I like bowling.
So don't talk to me like I'm some kinda fuckin' chump, alright?
Because I'm not.