Post: #1

Typically it goes like this. I go to dance/art/martial art/gym and meet girls. We talk and things go so well. Like their eyes light up when they see me coming. They would fight to do dance or train with me. Shit when the teacher/sensei announces partner change some girls would be like "no don't go" and make that cute kitten face.

They would be looking across the room and eye fuck me the whole time.

Teasing is involved. I joke one girl after I gave her a dirty dancing style air lift, about how she is obese. Like a kitten. And watch her mouth drop and the textbook "I hate you" with punching my arm. Or another girl calls me her instructor and her my student.

THEN, when I escalate by asking them out "come let's go grab a drink, we're both thirsty" or "you are cool, come to xyz with me" it always come down to this:

1. I can't today, can we go next time please? Yeah I've been in the game long enough to know that next time her cat will drown and she won't be able to come.

2. Can we get other in the group to come with us? I used to say sure why not, but this usually leads to gaming the whole group and potential cockblocker. When I tell her no, just you and me (in a playful way "what do you need a gang to kidnap me or something?"), she goes dark.

I did have a few times when I can isolate the girls and pull off a lay, but that's like 1/20.

So what am I lacking? Am I lacking attraction, and they dont want to go because they are not attracted enough? If so I need to stop giving these attention whores the privileges of being my partner in class and soak up in my fun. All that flirting and kino just for attention whoring and floating their ego.

Or am I lacking comfort? Especially in case 2. Are they attracted but not comfortable enough to go on a separate date? If so what am I to do.

Or is it simply the number game? If so I'm having horrible close rate 1/20.

Thanks guys.

Post: #2

My opinion is that it's either lack of comfort or some sort of connection or all of those girls who seem into you have BFs and just enjoy fooling around with you in a safe public place here nothing can happen.

Post: #3

Yes, yes, and yes.

You are lacking attraction AND you are lacking comfort AND it is all just a numbers game.

Welcome to masculine self improvement. We have to work on many things simultaneously.

Post: #4

(10-03-2014 11:01 AM)XXL Wrote:  My opinion is that it's either lack of comfort or some sort of connection or all of those girls who seem into you have BFs and just enjoy fooling around with you in a safe public place here nothing can happen.

Whats the best way to deal with that? Should I simply ignore them or keep gaming as usual? I notice that when I'm putting time in gaming some girls that I will see around I become quite out-come dependent.

Rereading the thread about emotional connection to learn more about comfort.

Post: #5

I think it's good to find out what you get yourself into before making a move [like inviting out]. Some ideas -> /thread-24453-...#pid460756

If you want to go for a taken girl there are many threads about that already on internet.

Post: #6

Thanks XXL, your advice threw me an awakening. I've been going to these activities game blazing, with insufficient screening. I guess what happen here is that I'm wasting energy entertaining girls who might not be DTF.

I might have fun in the process but the energy spent is not worth it. From now on I'm screening before throwing game.

Also, shouldn't making a move the best way to find out what I'm getting myself into? Escalation and pushing the boundaries are tools to separate the attention whores from the YES girls.

Post: #7

Yes, you're right, making a move is the best way to find out what you're getting yourself into.

However there is one big drawback that I hate about it. When you make a move or escalate fast you polarize aka you force girls to quickly make a decision about you. And those who are not down for you that quickly only get defensive towards you which makes

The way I like to do it is just being friendly at first chit chatting and screening at the same time having typical chode like "get to know each other" conversation mixed with flirting in between. It doesn't polarize nobody, I'm not hitting on anyone so everybody's cool with me in general. I know what who's who and what's what so I know the circumstances. The best part is that because I'm cool and friendly not hitting not anyone all the girls I talk to are my "allies" even those unavailable ones. So when I see I have no chance here I now have new friends to meet other girls with. Win/win

Post: #8

(10-02-2014 07:39 PM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  THEN, when I escalate by asking them out "come let's go grab a drink, we're both thirsty" or "you are cool, come to xyz with me" it always come down to this:

1. I can't today, can we go next time please? Yeah I've been in the game long enough to know that next time her cat will drown and she won't be able to come.

2. Can we get other in the group to come with us? I used to say sure why not, but this usually leads to gaming the whole group and potential cockblocker. When I tell her no, just you and me (in a playful way "what do you need a gang to kidnap me or something?"), she goes dark.


Thanks guys.

This comes off weak brotha. That's your problem