Post: #1

despite all the knowledge they have aquired here?

anyone here is banging hotties left and right and still feel some kind of a void?

is psychology considered bluepill? is it redpill? is it helpful? is it pseudo science with no credibility?

Post: #2

If you got emotional turmoil, banging a load of hot chicks is not the answer to address these problems. That is the wrong approach to self improvement.

Post: #3

(09-09-2014 03:55 AM)whatstheword Wrote:  is psychology considered bluepill? is it redpill? is it helpful? is it pseudo science with no credibility?

Cognitive behaviourial therapy has a good evidence base to it, so if you are looking for a therapist look for someone with that sort of background. Many branches of psychology are indeed pseudosciences.

A lot of cognitive behavioural therapy is just insight training, you can also look into mindfulness meditation if you'd rather not go into formal therapy.

Post: #4

If I were from a dysfunctional family, I would cut them off as firmly as possible (note: I basically was, and basically did).

You don't owe them anything. If they were in any way an impediment to you having a good life, you have a responsibility to yourself to remove their influence from your life, and learn from their disfunction so you don't repeat it when you yourself have a family.

You do feel a bit of a void in that you feel 'how much better my life would have been', and a resentment towards that. But it does slowly fade over time so long as you understand where those feelings come from.

If you do not know specifically where the feelings come from, a good therapist can help you uncover the reasons so you come to terms with them and let them fade.

Post: #5

Its easy to say you can cut off family like you cut off the slut who just flake on you. Sorry man, but unless you are dark triad or full on psychopathic its just not possible.

We never choose our family and what we grow up with stay with us for your whole life. It might sound like new-agey bogus stuff but sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night and those memories haunt you.

I dont know how dysfunctional your family is. Mine could have been better but I know for sure they never intend me any harm. They wanted good thing for me but they wanted to do it in their own ways which is disastrous sometimes. But Im still grateful and I love them. Its hard to shake the guilt trip no matter how much you change if they dont.

Im a sociologist/pyschologist MA and I say the knowledge itself is neutral. Its application can be either red or blue pill. Half of the stuff you learn in game is based on psychology and social conditioning techniques (sociology)

Post: #6

How old are you OP?

Post: #7

(09-09-2014 08:51 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  Its easy to say you can cut off family like you cut off the slut who just flake on you. Sorry man, but unless you are dark triad or full on psychopathic its just not possible.

Disagree. Depends on how toxic the family is. If your family is really toxic, then you must cut them off.

What I define as that toxic is being abusive (mentally, physically, emotionally), but also - and that is important - being manipulative and co-dependent creating.

A true narcissist or sociopath are deeply dangerous people for your emotional and mental health and should be cut off completely. They won't change.

Post: #8

Has 3 posts, then asks a bunch of unrelated questions that scream "baiting the forum into stupid strawman arguments"?

Post: #9

Growing up I had good parents, at the time we fought alot and I thought they were too strict and they didn't necessarily do everything perfect and they fucked up at times but overall I had parents that loved me and wanted what was best for me. Being older and knowing the world isn't a perfect place and hearing some fucked up stories of friends, gf's etc childhoods I feel very fortunate I had a pretty good childhood, nothing tramatic, had parents who loved me and pushed me.

As far as for those who had a bad childhood I didn't so I can't really comment on how to fix it but I'd say just realize you can't choose the hand you were dealt, you can only make the best of it. If you can and if they aren't total scumbags try to mend whatever relationship there is with your parents. SOme parents are too far gone or are toxic but at the very least maybe accept them for who they are, have them in your life to a degree but not enough to drag you down. A close friend of mine has a dad who was not in his life and a POS when he was. He talks bad about him, lowlife, lazy, etc. The other day at his daughters bday party I heard him takling to his dad on the phone, I guess pops was like oh tell her I'm sorry I can't make it. He was kind of cordial on the phone but when he got off was like piece of shit yeah I bet you can't make it. I guess he basically figured he'll take what he can get from his father but will probably never forgive him for the past and keeps him at an arms lenght so he or his family don't have expectations or can't be hurt by him.

Post: #10

(09-09-2014 08:51 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  Its easy to say you can cut off family like you cut off the slut who just flake on you. Sorry man, but unless you are dark triad or full on psychopathic its just not possible.

We never choose our family and what we grow up with stay with us for your whole life. It might sound like new-agey bogus stuff but sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night and those memories haunt you.

I dont know how dysfunctional your family is. Mine could have been better but I know for sure they never intend me any harm. They wanted good thing for me but they wanted to do it in their own ways which is disastrous sometimes. But Im still grateful and I love them. Its hard to shake the guilt trip no matter how much you change if they dont.

Im a sociologist/pyschologist MA and I say the knowledge itself is neutral. Its application can be either red or blue pill. Half of the stuff you learn in game is based on psychology and social conditioning techniques (sociology)

Cutting out family members is hard but sometimes necessary. I ended up letting my cousin crash at my place after he lost his job. Eventually that turned into a month and I got pissed at that point.

Post: #11

My family is extremely "dysfunctional" but I've never felt "stuck". I feel free to do whatever I want with my life.

(actually, there was a time when I did have to work to free myself from the psychological influences of my family)

I have always been free to do whatever I wanted. That is one of the positives of growing up in a "dysfunctional" family. They often don't care or are not able to care about what the happens with the kids.

That said, freedom can be dangerous if it is not used for positive and constructive purposes.