Post: #1

This Somali Cruise website is actually for real.

Quotes taken directly from the website :

"It's like a safari, only better"

"We sail up and down the coast of Somalia waiting to get hijacked by pirates. We encourage you to bring your 'High powered weapons' along on the cruise. If you don't have weapons of your own, you can rent them on the boat. "

"We guarantee that you will experience at least two hijacking attempts by pirates or we will refund half your money back, including gun rental charges and any unused ammo"

"How can we guarantee you will experience a hijacking? We operate at 5 knots within 12 miles of the coast of Somalia. If an attempted hijacking does not occur, we will turn the boat around and cruise by at 4 knots. We will repeat this for up to 8 days making three passes a day along the entire length of Somalia. At night the boat is fully lit and bottle rockets are shot off at intervals and loud disco music beamed shore side to attract attention. "

"Reserve your package before June 29 and get 100 rounds of free tracer ammo in the caliber of your choice."

"Fun for the whole family. Must cruises operate a mini bar, we operate a mini gun"

Ak-47 assault riffle? Rental - No charge. ammo: 100 rounds of 7.62 com block ball ammo at $14.95.

RPG? Rental - $75/day. ammo: 3 standard loads at $200.

"Everyone gets use of free complimentary night vision equipment and coffee and snacks on the top deck from 7pm-6am."

Testimonials
=========

"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'll never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!" -- Lars , Hamburg Germany

"Six attacks in 4 days was more than I expected. I bagged three pirates and my 12yr old son sank two rowboats with the minigun. PIRATES: 0 - PASSENGERS: 32! Well worth the trip. Just make sure your spotter speaks English" -- Donald, Salt Lake city Utah USA

"I haven't had this much fun since flying choppers in NAM . Don't worry about getting shot by pirates as they never even got close to the ship with those weapons they use and their shitty aim--reminds me of a drunken'juicer' door gunner we picked up from the motor pool back in Nam" -- 'chopper' Dan, Toledo USA.

"Like ducks in a barrel. They turned the ship around and we saw them cry in the water like little girls. Saw one wounded pirate eaten by sharks--what a laugh riot! This is a must do." -- Zeke, Springs Kentucky USA

Website :

http://www.somalicruises.com/

Post: #2

Really dude?

http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/hoaxes/piratecruise.asp

Post: #3

I would have gone. Badass.

Post: #4

(01-22-2014 12:19 AM)Peregrine Wrote:  Really dude?

http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/hoaxes/piratecruise.asp

doh!

Post: #5

Dibs on the minigun

Post: #6

As much as this is clearly not real from a million miles away, I can also guarantee that you'd have takers if you did offer such a service.

Post: #7

I almost felt bad for the pirates for a second.

Post: #8

I like....Working up a business plan.....

Post: #9

(01-22-2014 02:01 AM)Hotwheels Wrote:  I like....Working up a business plan.....

I smell an excellent investment opportunity.

Post: #10

(01-22-2014 02:01 AM)Hotwheels Wrote:  I like....Working up a business plan.....

The Archer avatar makes it so much better when reading that in his voice.... and just imagining the jokes...that'd be a great little storyline to return to his pirate days

Post: #11

(01-22-2014 12:24 AM)JJ Roberts Wrote:  

(01-22-2014 12:19 AM)Peregrine Wrote:  Really dude?

http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/hoaxes/piratecruise.asp

doh!

What a surprise.

Post: #12

I am surprised the Russian Mafia hasn't yet thought of hunting Somali pirates, not for sport, not as a maritime safari, but to harvest their organs. Kidneys, livers, and lungs are worth money...

Post: #13

Yeah, pay to be pirate bait. I'd rather be a pirate and be paid.

At least better a pirate than amateur law enforcement. I loathe that type. Leave the pirates to the pros, the Navy.

Post: #14

Does any country still issue letters of marque? If so, you may even be paid by the country for hunting down pirates.

Post: #15

(01-22-2014 06:38 PM)tarquin Wrote:  Does any country still issue letters of marque? If so, you may even be paid by the country for hunting down pirates.

Funny that you mention that....

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letter_of_marque

Quote:The issue of marque and reprisal was raised before Congress after the September 11 attacks[32] and again on July 21, 2007, by Congressman Ron Paul.

The attacks were defined as acts of "air piracy" and the Marque and Reprisal Act of 2001 was introduced, which would have granted the president the authority to use letters of marque and reprisal against the specific terrorists, instead of warring against a foreign state.

The terrorists were compared to pirates in that they are difficult to fight by traditional military means.[33] Congressman Paul on April 15, 2009, also advocated the use of letters of marque to address the issue of Somali pirates operating in the Gulf of Aden.

However, the bills Congressman Paul introduced were not enacted into law.

Post: #16

Dang, that was going to go on my bucket list.

Post: #17

If you have enough money and want to kill some people for fun Im sure there will be some businesses that cater to your needs.

I highly doubt they run public websites though.

Post: #18

The South China Sea and the Indian Ocean are where piracy is on the rise. Somalia got so much attention that there were only 9 hijacking attempts and 0 successes last year.

And for the right price, I'll let you kill anyone you want. There might be legal ramifications which I can't help you with, but I'll give you a thumbs up.

Post: #19

(01-22-2014 12:13 AM)JJ Roberts Wrote:  Testimonials
=========

"I got three confirmed kills on my last trip. I'll never hunt big game in Africa again. I felt like the Komandant in Schindlers list!" -- Lars , Hamburg Germany

"

No German would EVER say this. Ever.

Post: #20

Post: #21

If that would be true it would be just totally sick. I think the government of Somalia would support that. You make money by getting rid of a big problem without doing anything. But fucked up anyway.