Post: #1

This doesn't fit neatly in any of the other categories so I'm sticking in EE. I'm currently in Baltimore have a job offer in Austin from a really good company in my industry, decent bump in salary with re-lo expenses covered. Here's the kicker though: my direct supervisor would be a chick, and I saw the copy of "lean in" on her desk.

I felt "off" during the interview with her than I did with anyone else (met with 4 others, all the rest dudes). It wasn't terrible, but rapport was off compared with everyone else I talked to including her boss the VP. From what I gathered it does appear like I would have a fair amount of autonomy in the position and she would be my direct supervisor mostly in name...but hard to say precisely. It sucks because this company is solid, and I know I would learn a shitload there to apply to my own business/consulting projects.

I'm in the running for another job in Baltimore the company is not as good as Austin, but not bad either. My boss would be a man, a VP, so I'd be higher up the chain. There was a definite meeting of minds in our interview - he responded extremely positively to my ideas and I liked what he had to say. I'm highly confident I would do well working with him. I have not received an offer yet from Baltimore company, final interview is next week.

Lifestyle wise, though it's certainly not poosy paradise, it's fair to say Austin would be an solid upgrade from Baltimore. I'm not looking forward to another winter here, or the girls packing on their winter 15 lbs (more clothes to cover flab, taco time!). The company would be a great opportunity to expand and develop skill sets in my industry. It wasn't a horrible interview, but I just getting bad vibes from this chick.

At the present time I'm leaning with sticking it out in Baltimore and continuing to work on my side business to become location independent. But I appreciate thoughts any others might have.

Post: #2

Having a female boss is hell on earth.

Post: #3

It sounds like your gut is telling you she will be a problem.

Post: #4

(09-19-2013 06:20 PM)Roosh Wrote:  It sounds like your gut is telling you she will be a problem.

I am itching to get out of Baltimore. It's a great company where I would learn a lot of practical shit. Every other interview went great. I really liked Austin and could definitely see myself doing well there.

She's the only thing stopping me from going. There's a possibility she might not even be around much and I would be able to do my own thing for the most part...but I don't think I'm going to take the chance.

Post: #5

If you read this forum having a female boss in a corporate environment will not work out well for you.

I've had two corporate female bosses that were 'effective in their jobs' but just made me nuts. I had meltdowns on both of them. They danced around the real issues and just played politics all of the time.

I've had good female bosses outside of a cubicle setting though, in retail and labour. I agree with roosh though, if you have a bad feeling don't go.

Also, Austin is a liberal hipster magnet, like Nashville and Memphis, it is not the southern heaven it used to be.

Post: #6

I wouldn't write a potential boss off just because she's a chick. I've had shit male bosses and pretty good female bosses (though I would prefer a male boss, of course).

Post: #7

You fucked up big-time. You should have asked her about the copy of Lean In on her desk. "Is that a good book? I keep hearing about it." Her reaction and statement would have told you everything you needed to know.

Post: #8

(09-19-2013 09:46 PM)Brodiaga Wrote:  I wouldn't write a potential boss off just because she's a chick. I've had shit male bosses and pretty good female bosses (though I would prefer a male boss, of course).

I'm obviously biased towards having a male boss, but I wasn't going to write her off either. The rapport was just off. I gave an example a year-long project I completed that was extremely applicable to what they currently help with. Her response just came off like she wasn't interested or didn't understand. Her exact words were "ugh i bet you were glad when that was over". When I basically just said how proud I was because I made all this money for the company with an idea I came up with, and that was the first thing she said. I gave the exact same 'case study' with the 4 other interviews and they immediately understood and had a very positive reaction, so I don't think was my delivery. There were a lot of other 'red flags' like that.

Truth -ha! good point, maybe I'll call her up and ask her.

Post: #9

(09-19-2013 10:40 PM)poledaddy Wrote:  

(09-19-2013 09:46 PM)Brodiaga Wrote:  I wouldn't write a potential boss off just because she's a chick. I've had shit male bosses and pretty good female bosses (though I would prefer a male boss, of course).

I'm obviously biased towards having a male boss, but I wasn't going to write her off either. The rapport was just off. I gave an example a year-long project I completed that was extremely applicable to what they currently help with. Her response just came off like she wasn't interested or didn't understand. Her exact words were "ugh i bet you were glad when that was over". When I basically just said how proud I was because I made all this money for the company with an idea I came up with, and that was the first thing she said. I gave the exact same 'case study' with the 4 other interviews and they immediately understood and had a very positive reaction, so I don't think was my delivery. There were a lot of other 'red flags' like that.

Truth -ha! good point, maybe I'll call her up and ask her.

Then I would decline. Even one red flag is enough, because your boss has more power over you than anybody else. I would only accept the offer if I really wanted to move to Texas and take advantage of the relo package and new I could find a new job there easily.

Post: #10

I don't believe there is an income tax in Texas. I live in the DC subs of MD and I'm no stranger to Baltimore, it's a mess. All the female bosses I've worked under were awful but that was in my 20's. I think you will be more happy in Austin than Baltimore despite the female supervisor. She will be hard to get along with no doubt. Just approach her like a Vulcan with no emotion only logic and act like you are married to the job.
Texas women will beat Maryland women hands down in attitude alone, but Austin in Texas is government which makes it a liberal attraction. I really think you'll be happier in Texas. Good luck with your decision.

Uzi

Post: #11

(09-19-2013 01:29 PM)poledaddy Wrote:  This doesn't fit neatly in any of the other categories so I'm sticking in EE. I'm currently in Baltimore have a job offer in Austin from a really good company in my industry, decent bump in salary with re-lo expenses covered. Here's the kicker though: my direct supervisor would be a chick, and I saw the copy of "lean in" on her desk.

I felt "off" during the interview with her than I did with anyone else (met with 4 others, all the rest dudes). It wasn't terrible, but rapport was off compared with everyone else I talked to including her boss the VP. From what I gathered it does appear like I would have a fair amount of autonomy in the position and she would be my direct supervisor mostly in name...but hard to say precisely. It sucks because this company is solid, and I know I would learn a shitload there to apply to my own business/consulting projects.

I'm in the running for another job in Baltimore the company is not as good as Austin, but not bad either. My boss would be a man, a VP, so I'd be higher up the chain. There was a definite meeting of minds in our interview - he responded extremely positively to my ideas and I liked what he had to say. I'm highly confident I would do well working with him. I have not received an offer yet from Baltimore company, final interview is next week.

Lifestyle wise, though it's certainly not poosy paradise, it's fair to say Austin would be an solid upgrade from Baltimore. I'm not looking forward to another winter here, or the girls packing on their winter 15 lbs (more clothes to cover flab, taco time!). The company would be a great opportunity to expand and develop skill sets in my industry. It wasn't a horrible interview, but I just getting bad vibes from this chick.

At the present time I'm leaning with sticking it out in Baltimore and continuing to work on my side business to become location independent. But I appreciate thoughts any others might have.

Austin is a great city. Lots of heavily tattooed SWPL types, but also plenty of good talent as well. PM if you have any questions.

Post: #12

(09-19-2013 10:31 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  You fucked up big-time. You should have asked her about the copy of Lean In on her desk. "Is that a good book? I keep hearing about it." Her reaction and statement would have told you everything you needed to know.

Then you ramble and fuck the shit out of her. Establish dominance.

Post: #13

If you go, assume she is going to be a problem and go in with a plan. Generally, if you get known for doing good work in the first few moths at a job, you get a pretty wide berth going forward. And if there is a problem, then it becomes a problem with her management style and not your work.

Post: #14

Most female bosses respond in kind to our flavor of "alpha" especially in the workplace.

Don't be afraid to ask her for an opinion and at the same time don't be afraid to question her decisions on stuff.

You're established with creds and reputation. I wouldn't be too worried.

That being said, i've been lucky enough to work under female bosses who had my back (this was in retail though part time). My first corporate job had me working under a gay guy, but still an excellent leader.

I'd take it for the re-lo package and bounce once the golden handcuffs are off if you don't like it.

The rapport was off probably because you got her horny with all of the RVF stuff. In her mind, "Omg this is the guy Sheryll was talking about! The bad boy with good stuff!"

Post: #15

(09-20-2013 07:19 AM)frenchie Wrote:  The rapport was off probably because you got her horny with all of the RVF stuff. In her mind, "Omg this is the guy Sheryll was talking about! The bad boy with good stuff!"

Fuck. This is really starting to make sense. She's decently attractive, solid 7 I'd say, around my age. She's just a tad over the line on the buff/tall side from what I go for, but I'd hit if there were no consequences. I did my best to remain stoic/logical in the interview and no matter how good of answers I gave to her questions, her responses were just off. Like my example of project I designed and completed that was tailor-made to what they need help with- All the guys responses: "wow, that's impressive and what we need". Her: "ugh, I bet you were glad when that was over."

All the rapport problems was probably frustration because I wasn't hitting on her and giving her the type of attention she wanted.

I've had two female bosses that were attracted to me shortly after graduating college and it was hell-on-earth, I ended up having to quit both jobs. You make one wrong move/mistake and it's ten times worse, they throw a fit for minor shit, complain to supervisors about you, etc. I think many if not most female managers have a 6th sense for that undercover alpha in the office who is alpha outside but just trying to get by at work - you're the guy who pump and dumped them in college and never called them again, and now they will have their revenge.

I'm in a very data-driven field -the brain I use for work is completely different for the one I use for gaming. Other guys might be able to navigate a situation like this by giving them the right amount of attention to keep her at bay, but I don't want to deal with that shit at work, it's two totally different mindsets, at least for me for me. If I'm gaming a girl I'm trying to fuck her. If I'm working, I'm trying to analyze and solve problems. The two just don't mix well, in my experience.

Post: #16

Go to Austin and enjoy a change of scenery. Stack as much cash as possible, live cheap but comfortable as your job with the chick will be temporary unless you can get her fired.

I'll bet anything the reason there's an opening is her fault.

Post: #17

(09-20-2013 09:33 AM)poledaddy Wrote:  

(09-20-2013 07:19 AM)frenchie Wrote:  The rapport was off probably because you got her horny with all of the RVF stuff. In her mind, "Omg this is the guy Sheryll was talking about! The bad boy with good stuff!"

Fuck. This is really starting to make sense. She's decently attractive, solid 7 I'd say, around my age. She's just a tad over the line on the buff/tall side from what I go for, but I'd hit if there were no consequences. I did my best to remain stoic/logical in the interview and no matter how good of answers I gave to her questions, her responses were just off. Like my example of project I designed and completed that was tailor-made to what they need help with- All the guys responses: "wow, that's impressive and what we need". Her: "ugh, I bet you were glad when that was over."

All the rapport problems was probably frustration because I wasn't hitting on her and giving her the type of attention she wanted.

I've had two female bosses that were attracted to me shortly after graduating college and it was hell-on-earth, I ended up having to quit both jobs. You make one wrong move/mistake and it's ten times worse, they throw a fit for minor shit, complain to supervisors about you, etc. I think many if not most female managers have a 6th sense for that undercover alpha in the office who is alpha outside but just trying to get by at work - you're the guy who pump and dumped them in college and never called them again, and now they will have their revenge.

I'm in a very data-driven field -the brain I use for work is completely different for the one I use for gaming. Other guys might be able to navigate a situation like this by giving them the right amount of attention to keep her at bay, but I don't want to deal with that shit at work, it's two totally different mindsets, at least for me for me. If I'm gaming a girl I'm trying to fuck her. If I'm working, I'm trying to analyze and solve problems. The two just don't mix well, in my experience.

Without being there, I can't gauge what is going on. But from my limited guess, she sounds impressed and likes you in a professional way.

Women in power rarely give compliments and accolades. They do this mostly because they see guys never doing it so they think "Good leadership never gives compliments."

I'd say you're going to be alright. It totally sounds like sexual tension. As long as she didn't have a look of disgust on her face (trust your gut) then it should be fine.

Finally, I would do your best to merge game with the workplace especially if you find yourself around a lot of women. Game is what tips the power balance in our favor and keeps the ladies working for us. It also boosts your "alpha" and "leadership" reputation through the roof. Being a guy's guy and a charmer is the sign of a true leader. Game especially does not have to have an end goal of getting laid. In my experience, my game has helped me get into places I would have not been in previously. Charm is powerful, use it to get ahead professionally.

I personally like giving girls an "agree and amplify" whenever possible. It throws them off and they get kicks out of it.

Trust your judgement and tone it down if she can't handle it. I've met women who can't handle aggressive charm. Find the sweet spot and exploit it.

Post: #18

(09-20-2013 09:45 AM)el mechanico Wrote:  Go to Austin and enjoy a change of scenery. Stack as much cash as possible, live cheap but comfortable as your job with the chick will be temporary unless you can get her fired.

I'll bet anything the reason there's an opening is her fault.

What Mech said and come March when SXSW is on, the RVF family have a place to crash.