Post: #1

Parents of Reddit, what is the creepiest thing your young child has ever said to you?

Quote:This isnt paranormal creepy but I could only imagine my dads reaction.

Backstory: my dad works for the Canadian military and went overseas and cross country often due to his job.

One day he came back and when he was home, saw me drawing a family picture. He points at the man in the picture and asks if that is him and I say "that's the man that mommy let's sleep in your place when you aren't here" to which he replied "one second sweetie, mommy and I have to go have a long talk"

Tl;dr I snitched to my dad about my mom's not-so-secret sexual deviant side.

Post: #2

There are some bizarre things on that thread. Like the kid who said the best way to get a girlfriend is tell her be your girlfriend or else she won't she her parents again? WTF

Post: #3

Quote:My daughter is four and has taken to telling nonsensical knock-knock jokes (e.g. "Why did the Mama cross the road? Because her arms were noodles!"). One day she busts this one out:

Why did the butt cross the road?

Because it had a plug in it!

I have never felt so many conflicting emotions about my child.

Quote:My son (about 6) asked my mother to lay down on her stomach, then he sat on her butt and started bouncing up and down and proclaimed, "Now we're mating like reptiles!" Thanks Discovery Channel!

Quote:When I was about 3 we had a cat that had still born kittens. I asked my father if we could make crosses for them, which he did. As he was making them I asked:

"aren't those too small?",

Dad: "What do you Mean?"

Me: "aren't we going to nail them to them?"

Dad: (after several moments silence) "we're not going to do that"

Me: "oh"