Post: #1

I just came back from a kick ass midnight gym session ! It's back day for the win !

I firmly believe that you see more eccentric characters in the fitness world than anywhere else in real life besides maybe prison.

What kind of weird personas have you guys witnessed at your local gym/fitness center ?

Here are my favorites at my gym

1) Skinny showoff : college dude that snatches up a pair of 45's and proceeds to use his entire body to "curl" them. Usually manages to cheat out only 2 or 3 reps out before he slams the 45's on the floor and looks around to see who is watching his display of "strength".

2) Naked old men : These baby boomers in the locker room who I SWEAR just LOVE to be naked! They sit on the benches naked, shave naked, go to the bathroom naked and make no effort to hide their junk .....it drives me insane.

3) Mr. One sound per rep : 30 something wigger . EVERY single fucking rep he does , he makes a new sound ohhhhhh, ahhhhh, ehhhhhh, arghhhhh ,grrrrrr ,mphhhhhhhh , fuuuck ya . I also heard him rap along " Lose Yourself " by Eminem.

4) Invisible lats' guy: this scrawny Vietnamese newbie in my gym who lifts like barbie but walks around with his arms splayed out like he's got the biggest lats in the world! I had one convo with him. After that he always artificially deepens his voice and greets me with " whats up pimpin ? "

5) Circuit Training dude : Working class Italian guy who carries his phone around and chews gum at a 100 miles per hour with a permagrin on his face. Comes into the gym during the crowded hours and then claims ownership of 3 machines so he can run from one to another. Gets pissed if anyone suggests he share the equipment during the peak times.

Post: #2

Shit man, half my blog is dedicated to the idiots at my gym. Check it out:

http://bronanthebarbarian.com/tag/favori...haracters/

Here's the saga of how I got the biggest gym freak banned for life:

http://bronanthebarbarian.com/2012/04/05...e-sol-guy/

Post: #3

If you are going to rate your own thread, you might as well give it a 5 out of 5 instead of a 4 out of 5. LOL

Edit:

Quote:2) Naked old men : These baby boomers in the locker room who I SWEAR just LOVE to be naked! They sit on the benches naked, shave naked, go to the bathroom naked and make no effort to hide their junk .....it drives me insane.

These guys have been at every gym I have ever been to, including the gym at my college. It's ridiculous.

Post: #4

I have some pictures to post but I'm too busy to post them atm. Be sure to check back tomorrow afternoon!

Post: #5

Shit. Great thread.

Sadly none of the regulars I see are that interesting, it's always some one-off incident.

Recently was squatting next to a dude who was curling the olympic bar (this in itself is funny to me) with a pair of 10s on it. He had wrist straps on the bar and was heaving his whole body to curl the damn thing and making a huge show of it. In between sets he would turn sideways, flex, and look at himself in the mirror. At one point I flat out burst out laughing.

There's stupid shit I see on a regular basis. Scrawny dudes loading up the bar with 250lb+ and doing, not even quarter squats, like 1/8 squats. And then they rack it, make a ton of noise, and start walking around like they're the shit.

My gym is in a very ethnically mixed part of town. Lots of blacks and latinos. The latinos are a riot to watch. The only guys I've ever seen peacock at a gym. Especially at the bench. I'll watch one guy spot another benching 135 yelling at him in Spanish like they're in a competition, bang out a few reps, get up and then high five each other.

Post: #6

Dude who does barbell wrist curls (?) in the squat rack (?!) supersetted with 5-minute treadmill sprints. He never re-racks.

Dude who racks up about 6 plates on the leg press machine on each side, moves it about 4 inches per rep. Does not re-rack.

Dude who squats 3 or 4 plates with a belt at a depth of about 4 inches. At least he re-racks.

Lady who does 150 sit-ups on the decline bench, taking breaks every 10 reps but never leaves the bench.

Post: #7

Oh yeah not to mention the stuff I see trainers teaching people. I've seen skin and bones guys come in and they'll get paired with a female trainer. Guys who must be like 5'10" and 135lb who are in desperate need to lift. Trainer takes them over to the cardio room. wtf.

Or trainers having guys lift free weights with a yoga ball in the most retarded positions.

Post: #8

People who exercise in front of the dumbbells, even when the rest of the gym is avaliable. Having to wait 2 minutes whilst they complete their low weight high reps exercises kills me.

Post: #9

Dude, yeah.

Whats fucking weird about the naked old guys I see in the shower.

I never see them in the gym.

Where do they go? Do they live in the lockerroom? Did their showers break at home? I'm almost too scared to ask.


I'm going to add another couple.

Mr Wannabe Powerlifter : Saw a youtube video about deadlifting once, so he deadlifts 225 or sometimes even 135 and drops every single rep. Dropping the weight is forgivable as long as you're deadlifting at least 3 plates or you happen to weigh >140 lbs.

Curl monkeys : I have no problem with bodybuilders, but the guys who go in the gym and sit in front of the mirrors to "check their form" while they pump up their biceps with 20-30 lb dumbbells piss me off more often now than they used to. For whatever reason, I've seen more this year than I ever have at my gym. These guys tend to leave after a half hour, guzzling protein shakes and walking around like they borrowed their lats from Dorian Yates.

Guys who squat 1/4 of the way down and do really fast reps like they're doing something. I never see them doing regular squats with less weight, so I can't assume that they're doing quarter reps with above maximal weight to strengthen tendons or any variation.

Dudes who go to the "yoga" area to do pushups. They're idea of a pushup is the fastest possible quarter pushup and the illusion of touching their nose to the floor by rapidly craning their necks forward and backward. Some of these folks pretend to be calisthenics experts and blather on about "functional strength".

The kettlebellers who never learned proper form. I see all kinds of broken arm positions with their 40 lb clean and presses and goofy ass thigh sweeping with their swings.

Skinny dudes who do crossfit WOD's who load up barbells with weight and get out all kinds of equipment, but never put any of that shit away. Bonus points if they use a kettlebell that they can hardly carry.

People who load up weight on the barbell in the squat rack support struts (maybe for shrugs) and forget to put it away, thus bending the ever loving shit out of the barbell and making it worthless.

Post: #10

I work out on a military base. I see Marines and Sailors with eye patches and prothestic limbs working out all the time. It gives me motivation to limp my ass into the gym despite being hurt and in pain myself.

Post: #11

I see girls on that leg an/adductor machine the one where their legs are spread. They rep out 20 lbs for 5 mins. I usually stare at their cameltoes.

I once saw a morbidly obese chick teaching teenagers to snatch with the worst form possible. She couldn't even snatch properly because her gut was too fucking big

Post: #12

(04-05-2013 03:55 AM)All or Nothing Wrote:  If you are going to rate your own thread, you might as well give it a 5 out of 5 instead of a 4 out of 5. LOL

Edit:

Quote:2) Naked old men : These baby boomers in the locker room who I SWEAR just LOVE to be naked! They sit on the benches naked, shave naked, go to the bathroom naked and make no effort to hide their junk .....it drives me insane.

These guys have been at every gym I have ever been to, including the gym at my college. It's ridiculous.

Dude I hate walking in the locker room of my college just because of that, I don't understand why they are walking around naked.

I always look straight but once in a while there is one that pops up in front of me, that shit always pisses me off.

Post: #13

Great thread.

There's this guy at my gym who has a huge upperbody but has no legs whatsoever. His idea of training calves is literally dancing on the calf raise machine. His Range of Motion is almost non existent.

Post: #14

Just yesterday I seen a guy put the bar in the squat rack to about cheat height and start doing pushups (while standing) at a 60 degree angle. Its like just pushing off the wall rocking back and forth. Totally pointless haha

Post: #15

The idiots that walk over, whilst your doing rows on a bench, and bend down to get into your view to ask you how to do something..... Jeeeeeeeeeeeeez

Post: #16

Anybody else's gym have the 70+ yr old woman that wears the sports bra and short shorts, and who's tanned so often her skin resembles a leather couch? She has the best rack money can buy though haha

Post: #17

We don't have a lot of gym freaks. It's basically this crowd -

• Eighth squat jerkoffs - They usually load up two plates, shrug under the bar, step back, and basically ass-thrust about four to six inches behind them for a grand total of a 3 inch power stroke. They do like 12-14 reps and will walk over to critique your squat form, saying "You're going too low man, gonna wreck your knees. Trust me, I know. I'm a licensed cock gobbler."
• "Lungers" - These guys grab ten pound dumb bells in each hand and act like their two sets of ten lunges workout is the same as 20 repping your bodyweight + 80 pounds under the squat bar.
• "Crunches" guy - He likes to find the least convenient place to rep out about 300 low-range crunches. Generally this guy lays on his back, tucks his knees in, and jerks forward until his head just clears the ground, then lands back to earth. You can find this guy near the drinking fountain, near stair wells, or in front of the locker room door.
  

Post: #18

Quote: Whats fucking weird about the naked old guys I see in the shower.

I never see them in the gym.

Where do they go? Do they live in the lockerroom? Did their showers break at home? I'm almost too scared to ask.

Hahaha man if I had a drink I would have spilled it over here. That is so true, I have no idea where these guys go.

Two characters at my gym that come to mind. One is an older man who chooses to socialize rather than work out. He seems to know everyone, and talks to everyone, for minutes at a time. I feel bad for anyone who gets trapped in a conversation with him, they are at the very least 5-6 minutes in length. He even talks to people for extended periods of time in the locker room..

The other, is the tag team. 2 guys that workout together and assist each other's sets, while making tons of noise. They isolate each other's muscle groups to help their workouts.. Ie when one is doing seated rows, the other is holding and pushing against his traps to help isolate.

One of these guys grunts with every set, loud enough anyone without headphones looks over at least once. 1 MORE... 1 MORE... LAST ONE. Its almost comical really, it makes me wonder if they do it to increase muscular exertion or gather attention, maybe a bit of both.

Seems like every gym has at least one of these 'tag teams'. But a tag team and a grunting team? That is unique.

Post: #19

What about the guys who load up the bench press with silly weights compared to their size. I've seen a few guys doing this including one guy who must weigh all of 150 pounds throw on 315. He gets 2 guys to spot him and he pounds out a quarter super aided rep. He does this everytime I see him.

Post: #20

(04-05-2013 01:37 PM)Hades Wrote:  We don't have a lot of gym freaks. It's basically this crowd -

• Eighth squat jerkoffs - They usually load up two plates, shrug under the bar, step back, and basically ass-thrust about four to six inches behind them for a grand total of a 3 inch power stroke. They do like 12-14 reps and will walk over to critique your squat form, saying "You're going too low man, gonna wreck your knees. Trust me, I know. I'm a licensed cock gobbler."
  

I love trolling these guys by going "bro can I work in" then ATG squatting whatever they're working with.

Post: #21

I like how OP uses skinny guys as example of obnoxious gym goers when in many peoples' experiences, it's the lunkheads are far more douchey. Hmm..

Post: #22

One buff guy and his medium sidekick: Buff guy talks loudly and always does dips and pull-ups. Each rep sounds like he's busting a nut. He talks so loud that I can recall him telling stories to his sidekick of him riding a motorcycle 80 mph just to ride 50 miles to let it warm up properly. Newbies to the gym always get a kick out of his grunting.

The workers are skinny as hell, get in the way, and hold long conversations with people in between sets.

Post: #23

To be honest most of the buff guys use proper equitette. One thing I can't stand is when guys slam weights unnecessarily. I get it for deadlifts and some olympic lifts. But on tricep pulldowns is it really necessary. I got hurt one time from a guy who let the tricep pulldown drop from near full height while I was doing some pulldowns to the side of him. It shook the damn machine so hard that my shoulder was fucked up for a few months.

Post: #24

You finally see a empty bench, adjust the seating and then look for weights. Since people never put back their dumbells in an order fashion, it sometimes takes half a minute to find the two of them. When you finally do and turn around some other guy is using your bench. Fucking hate this.
When you say something like : "o, i was just about to use that bench" they look at you like they see water burning. Happened to me again today. This time I didn't even bother telling the guy and found another exercise to do.

Guys putting a towel on a bench to "reserve" it and then walk away for like 10 minutes.

Guys use the same machine for 30 minutes and doing only 3 sets of 5 reps.

Girls (but sometimes also guys) occupying the leg exercise machines by yapping to each other and not actually exercising on them.

Girls/women being at least 20 kilos overweight and thus with a fat belly doing crunches. You want to see your abs? Lose that 20 kg first.

Girls/women being at least 20 kg overweight using the cycling machines. Cycling so slow that they burn like 3 calories an hour.


People walking around with loud earphones, a water bottle and a towel. What the hell do you need all that shit for? There"s already music playing over the gym speakers, you can surely do without water for one hour and a towel, for what? You shower in between sets? Just do your exercises and beat it.

Post: #25

(04-05-2013 12:22 PM)Hannibal Wrote:  Dude, yeah.

Whats fucking weird about the naked old guys I see in the shower.

I never see them in the gym.

Hahahahaha that's the fucking truth! I never see those dudes outside of the locker room. Like they just show up for nudist hour, freeball for a while and then leave.