Post: #1

Happened to me several times, not sure what to make of it.

"Hit" it off with an OKC/POF chick, maybe exchange 10-15 flirtatious texts back and forth. Then you say the wrong thing - usually something too overtly sexual - and she goes, "not interested"

What's this mean...wait a couple days and restart?

My reasoning is that if she were truly uninterested she woulda just gone radio silence. But since she did respond....

That being said, the 4-5 times this has happened, I haven't had much luck salvaging that shit, so what's your belief?

Post: #2

Since this has happened so many times perhaps you should take a look at the text convo to see what prompted that reply.

Also dont text her so much.
Always say less than needed.
I bet that if you applied standard text game rules to this you'd be fucking her.

Post: #3

right...

Post: #4

Sounds like you're pushing it too far in the 10-15 flirt texts. "Not interested" has never ever happened to me. It just goes radio silence in which case if I feel compelled I can send a restart to later.

I don't think "not interested" warrants a restart. You're done.

You're probably getting too excited and having mini-oneitis or getting too sexual after some flirty texts and you scare her away. Keep it very short. 1-2 flirty texts if necessary then logistics for next meeting while practicing the usual text game rules.

Post: #5

You're scaring them off with the sexual stuff.

When they say "not interested" they are telling you that you have offended them and to not contact them again

I avoid any sex talk in online messaging or texting with a girl I haven't actually met. Maybe some light flirting at most, often not even that.

Go for the meeting within 4-6 texts then keep texting to a minimum until you meet

Post: #6

(04-02-2013 08:06 PM)MrXY Wrote:  You're scaring them off with the sexual stuff.

When they say "not interested" they are telling you that you have offended them and to not contact them again

I avoid any sex talk in online messaging or texting with a girl I haven't actually met. Maybe some light flirting at most, often not even that.

Why the hos be scared by light banter about sex? Aren't they on POF to get the D?!

Is this some hamster rationalization that they're after true love on POF not sex?

Post: #7

They don't really "know" you until they meet you thus they will not be comfortable with sexual banter. Any girl doing that before meeting would actually be a red flag for ME.

Post: #8

(04-02-2013 08:12 PM)presidentcarter Wrote:  They don't really "know" you until they meet you thus they will not be comfortable with sexual banter. Any girl doing that before meeting would actually be a red flag for ME.

why's that a red flag for you? seems like itd be more a green light

Post: #9

(04-02-2013 08:14 PM)guerrilla Wrote:  

(04-02-2013 08:12 PM)presidentcarter Wrote:  They don't really "know" you until they meet you thus they will not be comfortable with sexual banter. Any girl doing that before meeting would actually be a red flag for ME.

why's that a red flag for you? seems like itd be more a green light

Because it's abnormal for a girl to do that. I mean it would depend...but after a few short random messages on POF resulting in a number exchange if this girl starts getting sexual I'm going to think something is up. Something like she's not the girl in the pictures or someone's trolling with me or some other whack shit.

Catch her attention, get her number, set logistics, escalate when you meet. This isn't cyber sex on AOL anymore.

Post: #10

The only point of OKC and subsequent communications is to get her out on a date. The more you say, the greater is the likelihood that you'll fuck up and she will lose interest. She has 10,000 other guys who are competing for her attention, so she will disqualify for almost anything, if it seems the slightest bit like it's not exactly what she wants to hear at that precise moment on that particular day. She has almost zero investment in the interaction at this point, so it doesn't cost her a thing to "Next!" you.

It really is like fishing... when the fish is nibbling at your baited hook, if you move the pole or touch the line, the fish will sense the vibrations (bad vibes) and lose all interest. You wait until you have a solid bite (interest) then don't mess around, yank the pole hard to set the hook, by proposing drinks when she is most favorably impressed and you still come off as "super cool relaxed uncaring dude who just does things on the spur of the moment because he's so chill and nonchalant." The more you chat/text, the greater is the likelihood that she will find something not to like, or rationalize something not to like, or subconsciously perceive you as beta for not setting the hook and acting.

Any girl who will get sexual with a guy she has never actually met, without a huge time investment (such as some guy's 'online girlfriend' from a third world country whom he's cammed and chatted with for hours upon hours) is either playing around and has no intention to actually meet guys, or is a huge slut. Most girls are slutty enough to put out after a date or two, but not enough to seriously intend sex based on nothing but an arrangement of pixels on their computer screen and a few witty text messages. I strictly avoid sexual innuendo unless she starts it -quickest way to turn her off. And come to think of it, I don't think I've ever banged a girl from online who did initiate any kind of sexual texts before the first date.

Post: #11

i echo Ovid's sentiments
if she's interested enough to interact with you in the first place, it means she finds you more attractive than 90% of the goofballs on the site, so your strategy has to be to get her out on a date asap
this also forms an impression of 'this guys knows what he wants, he doesn't hang around' in the girl's mind, which also will do your chances no harm
the more over and back conversations you have with chicks online, the more opportunities they have to disqualify you based on some seemingly harmless comment you made to them one time
get her out and show her you're a real person, and so long as you don't look like john merrick, or have any awkward afflictions like tourettes, your chances of closing will go up exponentially

Post: #12

(04-02-2013 07:37 PM)kinjutsu Wrote:  Since this has happened so many times perhaps you should take a look at the text convo to see what prompted that reply.

Also dont text her so much.
Always say less than needed.
I bet that if you applied standard text game rules to this you'd be fucking her.

+1