I took the drinking a bit too far last night. That's uncharacteristic for me. I like to be in control of my faculties.Don't post online when you're fucked up. It's the same as jumbo-tron test. If you don't want it plastered on the jumbo-tron don't send it.
My evening started off well enough. I had a girl stop by, banged it a couple times, and sent her on her way. I got a text from a friend to meet at out favorite dive bar. This bar is a mixture of thugs, hipsters, and artsy types. And then the drinking started. Serious drinking.
We started off easy enough with Newcastle Brown Ale until our favorite bartender broke out a fresh new bottle of Basil Hayden Bourbon. My buddy (we'll cal him "Psycho"- because whenever we discuss survival in a post apocalyptic world, says he will murder all strangers he encounters "just in case") decides that this is our bottle. We finished the bottle, and somehow I made it home.
This was my first real night out in months. In January I had hernia surgery, so I was housebound. And then I started EMT school just for shits and giggles. I'm in school twice a week, and I work evenings. I typically spend my free time studying, and seeing who wants to hook up.
The serious silliness started when I got home. Instead of going to bed I answered a text from another broad I'm doing. She was in the area and wanted to stop by when she left a party. I said ok, so I had to find something to do to occupy my time until she came over. I went to the internet. I sent out stupid responses via email, and posted some Weekly World News type shit here
/thread-21781-...pid395073. Then I tried to correct it when I realized what I had done. If only it ended there.
The next thing I recall was the girl that was coming over asking me "why are you sitting on the floor naked, holding a rifle"? Apparently I decided that I would put my new flashlight and mount on my FAL. The light and mount were delivered earlier today.
When I came back to my condo shit faced, I left the exterior door to my building wide open. I entered my unit, turned off my alarm, and left my door ajar, and that's how she got in. Once I assured her that the rifle wasn't loaded, I taught her how to verify that it wasn't loaded. Then I explained how to sight it in. Now she's interested in shooting it at the range when the weather gets a bit warmer. After I put it back in my safe we went to bed.
I woke up this morning head pounding and having to piss like a race horse, but I soldiered on. Popped a few Ibuprofen, drank a liter of water and got some pussy. Still had a bit of whiskey dick so she was happy. Moral of the story? Stay the fuck away from the computer when you're high, drunk, or acting stupid. No good can come from it. On the bright side, this still isn't near my worst night. That involved some of my friends "leasing" me to a 450 Samoan woman when I passed out at a bar once. Story for another time.
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