Post: #1

I need some help fixing my vibe and cynical personality. I’m 27 years old, average looking I guess and have a ton of trouble meeting girls/people. I’ve been in SC 11 months and had basically no luck.. I’m currently reading bang though, should finish it this evening. I’ve been on these forums a long time and a lurker for a couple years but it was mostly just travel.

My problems, that I know of, are mainly my vibe in general(AA also obv). Body language, tone/speed/volume of my voice. Not being in the moment, interactions almost always catch me by complete surprise if I am not the initiator I tend to daydream about 100% of the time and everything I say to people is sorta robotic . I don’t exactly know how to fix this. Adderall helps but I'm not tryin to rely on a drug. I’m generally a quiet, non bs, dry, honest, cynical person who gets to the point. I have a hard time smiling sometimes unless I’m with friends. All this together is a recipe for disaster. I’m especially worried about chatting up a girl who has a bf near that I don't see. I don't exactly know how to handle those situations in a positive way.

Its funny that I have so many issues, I am nearly 3 dozen notches deep. I did extremely well later in high school but the military kinda destroyed it. Especially Fayetteville.

I’ve been considering a bootcamp because I usually need a mentor or coach before I make even the slightest progress at anything and for the constructive criticism. I find that it helps with confidence and motivation. I’ve never exactly been one to read a book and apply the knowledge with success. Don't know why.

It’s not just about getting laid. I’d like to get better at meeting people and having positive interactions with everyday people. These problems were masked for a while because I spent a couple months in South America and about 1.5 years living in my hometown where I have all this.

I kinda rambled and maybe I'm kinda feeling sorry for myself but I believe putting my thoughts down and getting critiqued on my line is pretty helpful.

Post: #2

Also, as soon as I learned what qualifying was I knew that it is something I do. I qualify myself constantly, to anyone. Not exactly sure why the hell I do/did this.

Post: #3

If you're in college take a basic speech/communications course. If not, hire a speech coach.

Post: #4

I can coach you. PM me if you want..

Post: #5

u sound super stressed man. In what way do you relax?

Post: #6

(12-24-2012 03:41 AM)SnakeEyes Wrote:  u sound super stressed man. In what way do you relax?

I was kinda going through my post drunken depression when I posted that. I've never really been told I sound stressed but it makes sense. Where I am now I probably don't relax a lot. I'm usually bored or reading but it doesn't relax me. Back home I relax by bullshitting with friends.