Post: #76

There is a member here who is literally facially disfigured and he's preserving in spite of his hindrance. And he's succeeding, too. If there's anyone who should be complaining about not getting results, it should be him, and it'd be understandable. No offense ru2486.

And yet you, a good looking guy, is complaining about not getting results when you're not even putting in the work to get those results.

Forget game. OP needs to visit a psychiatrist to address his deep-seated insecurities.

Post: #77

He's got a victim mentality from years of confusion.

He just needs to knock it off.

C'mon dude! Knock off that victim shit! There's a lot of cool stuff going on, we're here to help. Start talking and thinking like you believe you're a winner and eventually you'll start actually believing it.

Fail forward. Small victories. Motivation. Yada yada...blah blah. If it's tough you're probably doing it right. You need to get past the breakers to get into the ocean. Fake it til you make it. Eat right....any of that help?

Post: #78

Today I went out for a bit to do photography and approach a couple girls. Was really in my head for the first hour, went up to a pretty girl wearing headphones who looked like she was in about her mid-twenties and said "hey, excuse me, this is random, but I thought you were cute and wanted to come talk to you. I stuttered and sounded unusually beta...she smiles and takes a few steps away, I try to catch up with her to see what was going on and she tells me she's not interested.

After that I thought fuck it, I'm doing elderly talk now. Went up to 3 girls just to ask where the L train was - super fucking easy and it's nice to be able to talk to a cute girl without getting blown off. Makes you feel like an equal. Was really pissed that i let the last two go though, I'll probably ask follow up questions next time.

Edit: just saw a hot fuckibg girl get off at my stop and I didn't approach because I didn't have a questiion that I could ask right then and there.

Post: #79

what I don't get is how is it that a girl that would've rejected me (most cute/attractive girls basically) if I went direct would suddenly become interested if I had a boring conversation with her about the weather?

Post: #80

^ No guarantees man. Keep going.

Have you read Roosh's Bang or no?

Post: #81

(06-16-2015 05:57 PM)game_ethic Wrote:  There is a member here who is literally facially disfigured and he's preserving in spite of his hindrance. And he's succeeding, too. If there's anyone who should be complaining about not getting results, it should be him, and it'd be understandable. No offense ru2486.

And yet you, a good looking guy, is complaining about not getting results when you're not even putting in the work to get those results.

Forget game. OP needs to visit a psychiatrist to address his deep-seated insecurities.

Dude, if 22 out of 25 (88%) of the direct approaches you do get you blown out, then you're not a good looking guy. I'm accepting it. I have good/consistent hygiene, put effort into my appearance and I have good posture - I max out on all of those things as much as I can that are in my power (as for my body, cutting fat takes time and all I can really do is keep lifting and eating at a deficit, i'm seeing progress and i look normal in clothes), so that's not it.

Post: #82

Maybe my voice (which sometimes comes out kind of high/childish) or a certain expression on my face might be a deterrant but I think guys that are good looking get away with being a bit insecure, and I honestly sound calm when I open a girl most of the time.

Post: #83

(06-16-2015 09:23 PM)depravity Wrote:  

(06-16-2015 05:57 PM)game_ethic Wrote:  There is a member here who is literally facially disfigured and he's preserving in spite of his hindrance. And he's succeeding, too. If there's anyone who should be complaining about not getting results, it should be him, and it'd be understandable. No offense ru2486.

And yet you, a good looking guy, is complaining about not getting results when you're not even putting in the work to get those results.

Forget game. OP needs to visit a psychiatrist to address his deep-seated insecurities.

Dude, if 22 out of 25 (88%) of the direct approaches you do get you blown out, then you're not a good looking guy. I'm accepting it. I have good/consistent hygiene, put effort into my appearance and I have good posture, so it's none of those things.

You getting blown out 22 times has a lot more to do with inexperience, demeanour and attitude than it does looks.

YOU ARE A GOOD LOOKING DUDE.

It's starting to seem like statements above are all you are fishing for.

Go out and work to optimise your look, workout, take care of your skin, rock a sharp haircut and update your wardrobe.

Just stop being such a little pussy. God damn.

'I'm not good looking man waah waah waah. Nothing you say is going to convince me different'

Fine, maybe you should accept that your looks will give you a 'low ceiling' for success and commit to a life of mediocrity and wining like a bitch.

Your doing my head in and I bet a bunch of other dudes here feel the same. Most of us here are serious about improving ourselves and have put effort into getting you on track.

Only you can only help yourself now.

Get the fuck up off your ass and work to optimise everything you have in your arsenal.

Or go elsewhere and whine about how you look and how you should look whilst life passes you by.

Choose wisely.

Post: #84

My sticking point with elderly game is that most of the questions I can think of are retarded (I live in New York and don't know how to take a train transfer, I'm asking for directions when I probably have a smartphone, or I'm asking about a Starbucks when there's a coffee shop on every street). I also don't know how to segueway after they give me directions, I'm not good at talking off-the-cuff - I tried "are you from around here?" right after on one girl and she said yes and walked off smirking because she probably got the sense that I was hitting on her. Most of these girls didn't look receptive to tedious small talk, plus it makes me feel like a chode/asexual - wasting an approach on a hot girl to ask about McDonald's.

Post: #85

It's funny to see the girls who walk fast and have resting bitchface (likely blowout if I went direct) being helpful and having her guard completely down though.

Post: #86

If indirect game isn't working for you or just isn't your style then change to direct game. I prefer to go direct because I hate beating around the bush and it's more congruent with my personality. You have to experiment and see what fits your personality best.

Post: #87

You need a wingman...

His purpose would be to A) Kick your ass around the block a few times, bust your balls, get you out of your funk
B) Critique you on your game as the two of you roam the night looking for loose women.

Good Luck

Post: #88

Listen to this daygame audio clip from forum member Spider, who is only a year older than you I believe.





You're in NYC, right? Hit up Central Park or just walk around in SoHo where you'll have much more options to choose from. I guarantee you if you go to Central Park right now there'd be at least 3-4 girls (maybe even more) sitting on the park benches reading or waiting for a friend.

Post: #89

@game_ethic

I prefer direct game in principle (it's congruent and i don't have to repress my attraction to a girl), but all I ever get is blowouts doing it. I have to switch it up for now, at least during the day. Either direct doesn't work on New York girls or there's no initial attraction/I don't meet the physical standard (I can tell by their body language and the look on their faces as they're trying to come up with a way to put me down nicely or just keep walking without saying anything). It's easy to chalk it up to not being someone's type when it's like a couple yuppie late 20s white girls in Manhattan, but 20+ blowouts in a row is a trend that you can base a solid conclusion off of. I don't think it has anything to do with my demeanor because ive seen rsdmax pull off direct day game while visibly a bit nervous (some stuttering and fumbling with words in the moment) and he happens to be decent looking. Girls are actually willing to hear him out. I have no real conversation skills to make up for my average-looks so it's going to be tough to get good at game - I have to try and work with zero attraction basically.

Post: #90

O.P.:
Meet up with a respected forum member in New York City and he should be able to tell you what the problem really is and will hopefully be able to steer you in the right direction. There is a ton of speculation going on here some of which I don't agree with. I doubt the whole problem is that you are giving off an inexperienced vibe, because that can actually work in your favor with some girls because they see you as less of a threat. The best way to improve is to have someone from here observe you and give some constructive criticism.

Post: #91

The vibe you give off is almost as important as your looks.

You know how Emma Stone is good-looking but gives off a boyish vibe so you're not turned on? Well, men have the same issues.

Some come off too menacing and "weird" and give women the creeps.
Some appear too non-masculine and exude no sexuality.
Others don't leave any impression at all.

The best way to appear, believe it or not, is like a "bro," the most despised designation on the planet these days. But don't listen to haters. Feminists and hipsters just criticize bros because they're jealous of their charisma, camaraderie, and humor.

When I hung with a band of bros my senior year in high school I was more despised than ever by the nerds, but more popular than ever with women. Being a "good-time Charlie," as the old school administrators used to call my crowd, has its advantages.

Post: #92

(06-17-2015 04:18 PM)game_ethic Wrote:  Listen to this daygame audio clip from forum member Spider, who is only a year older than you I believe.





You're in NYC, right? Hit up Central Park or just walk around in SoHo where you'll have much more options to choose from. I guarantee you if you go to Central Park right now there'd be at least 3-4 girls (maybe even more) sitting on the park benches reading or waiting for a friend.

He sounds more normal/human/empathetic than me and there's more spontaneity to his approach, even from the start. I literally just go up, and say my opener (6 words) the exact same way I always do with, like it's a recorded tape or something playing regardless of the girl I'm talking to.

Post: #93

Your OCD about your looks, being in your head, low self esteem, etc is probably making your direct approaches come across as creepy and that is why you are getting blown out by these chicks. Your words don't match your swagger.

You mention having no conversation skills. Why don't you just chill out with these direct approaches and work on interacting with people for a week or two. Everyone you cross paths with during the day, from the MILF walking her dog to the barista you get your coffee from to the girl standing next to you at the crosswalk to the grandma shopping for groceries or whatever at your work. Practice your small talk with them and learn how to make women laugh and tease them. Maybe it is just a one liner by you or a 5-10 minute conversation, the goal is to get her to smile or laugh, don't worry about banging her or getting a number. This is some real elementary shit but most people do not know how to communicate with strangers, it is not something taught in school. As you get more confident with the rambling and playful banter when you approach a hot chick your mind will switch to cruise control and the conversation just flows, you are not in your head giving a canned line worrying how she is going to respond.

Post: #94

The Roosh Program

Print in and make a poster of it. Put it in your phone and read it every spare moment. Hell, read it out loud every day and play with your voice while doing so!

Quote:I want to share a game program for those of who are starting from scratch, regardless of age. It’s not meant to turn you into a Casanova, but it will quickly take your game above the mainstream average. It’s also useful for beta males who just got dumped. Every step in the program is essential and must be followed if you want it to be effective. Here we go…

1. Start a workout routine. Working out will surely improve your appearance, but there are two other reasons that are more important: (1) to increase your testosterone levels, and (2) to increase your confidence. Both are absolutely vital for successful pickup. If there’s a gym near you, I recommend Starting Strength, which I’ve personally seen strong results from. If you can’t afford a gym, buy Convict Conditioning, a bodyweight and calisthenic program. Within only one month you will see noticeable gains.

2. Get your hands on a game resource. As you know I’ve written two game books, Bang and Day Bang, but there are other options as well. Mystery Method is one of the more important books in the field and, if you don’t want to pay anything at all, you can go with the free Layguide, a resource I started with. Be sure to take notes on whichever resource you select. I don’t advise using The Game as a resource because it’s more of a memoir, with only a cursory glance at specific game techniques.

3. Do 100 approaches. You need to get a feel for game, its structure, tempo, and how cold conversations work. This is going to be a rough period for you because chances are you won’t get laid from your first 100, but realize that all players have gone through this stage. I recommend 10-20 approaches a week in either day or night settings. Don’t mix the two because their game is very different and doing both will confuse you. If you already go out at night, for example, then do your first 100 at night. You must also understand that 100 means 100. It doesn’t mean 30, it doesn’t mean 60. There is no shortcut to this step. If you don’t do the 100 approaches, you’re not doing the program.

4. Watch one episode of Seinfeld a day. Seinfeld is an American comedy program that will teach you two things: (1) how to spit humor that girls like, and (2) how to have long, meandering conversations (i.e. how to ramble). What’s great about the show is that it offers quintessential American humor that will be well-received anywhere in the country, and even in foreign countries as well. I’ve lost count how many times I’ve successfully used word-for-word bits from the show in my pickups. The best time to watch an episode is right before heading out to approach. You can find used DVDs of the show for only a few bucks.

5. Limit masturbation to only one day a week. You’re not going to be too motivated to the challenging task of approaching girls if you’re not horny. Therefore you must greatly curtail your masturbation habits to only one day a week, preferably an off day like Sunday. You want your weighted balls to push you to approach since there is no option of release through your overused hand.

6. Write down notes and observations in a dedicated player notebook. Learning game bombards your brain with so much information and data that it’s necessary to write notes from your field experiences. Record lines that worked and lines that didn’t. Jot down specific venues you did well at. Write your conclusions from episodes of success or failure. I also want you to keep track of your daily approach count to know when you’ve gotten to 100. Your player notebook will eventually be a personal bible that reminds you of all the lessons you’ve learned.

7. Read one new book every two weeks. My old recommendation was to read only one book per month, but I no longer consider that to be enough. Reading is important because it sends a waterfall of words through your brain that want to come out during conversation. The biggest problem beginners have is maintaining interesting chats, a gap that book reading and Seinfeld viewing help narrow. If you’re looking for book ideas, I’ve reviewed over one-hundred. Many will give you excellent fodder for conversation.

8. After your 100 approaches, take two weeks off to reflect. Spend days in the coffee shop with your player notebook to take further notes and review the things you have learned. Instead of blindly continuing, I want you to break down your 100 and then come up with a plan for your next 100. Where are you failing? What are your sticking points? What is the feedback that girls have been giving you? What are some changes you can make to improve your results? Re-consult your game resource if you have to. Ask questions on the forum if you don’t know how to solve a problem, but don’t ask a thing until you’ve done your first 100.

9. Repeat steps 3 through 8 while still working out. Stick to the initial venue you started with (if you did your first 100 at night, stick to night for the next 100). This allows you to build real competency. Don’t try to switch just because it’s difficult, because both are difficult in their own way.

Most newbies will not get laid in their first cycle of 100 (maybe not even a date), but a few number closes should hopefully occur. In the second cycle you should start to see dates or intimacy if you did step number 8 correctly and identified your weaknesses. Some others who start off with low social ability will take even longer, maybe four or five cycles. It doesn’t matter how many cycles it takes as long as you focus on your goal and refuse to stop until you get what you want. If you find yourself wanting to quit like a little pussy, watch one of the following YouTube clips and then go out and give me at least five approaches…

Powerful beyond measure
I am a champion
How bad do you want it?
Inch by inch
Pain is temporarye approaches…

There’s a man inside you that is being held back, dying to be released from the pitiful sexless existence he’s trapped in. I know this to be true because your ancestors were real men who survived a much harsher world than the one you are being coddled in. Now go put in the work to release him.

Bold part, how bad do you want it?

Post: #95

(06-18-2015 12:20 AM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  The vibe you give off is almost as important as your looks.

You know how Emma Stone is good-looking but gives off a boyish vibe so you're not turned on? Well, men have the same issues.

Some come off too menacing and "weird" and give women the creeps.
Some appear too non-masculine and exude no sexuality.
Others don't leave any impression at all.

The best way to appear, believe it or not, is like a "bro," the most despised designation on the planet these days. But don't listen to haters. Feminists and hipsters just criticize bros because they're jealous of their charisma, camaraderie, and humor.

When I hung with a band of bros my senior year in high school I was more despised than ever by the nerds, but more popular than ever with women. Being a "good-time Charlie," as the old school administrators used to call my crowd, has its advantages.

I don't think decent looking guys can ever be creepy. Girls will think of them as shy, troubled, mysterious, etc. They don't need to be textbook alpha males or have some picture-perfect approach/demeanor. Some guy who looks like Francisco Lachowski doing his first cold approach (assuming girls aren't already approaching him and he's like some guy who sits at home all day and plays video games) would get lots of sympathy. I can tell when I'm being rejected for my looks - girls will get this look of bewilderment/second-hand embarrassment on their face and try to avoid eye contact with me.

Post: #96

(06-18-2015 11:40 AM)depravity Wrote:  

(06-18-2015 12:20 AM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  The vibe you give off is almost as important as your looks.

You know how Emma Stone is good-looking but gives off a boyish vibe so you're not turned on? Well, men have the same issues.

Some come off too menacing and "weird" and give women the creeps.
Some appear too non-masculine and exude no sexuality.
Others don't leave any impression at all.

The best way to appear, believe it or not, is like a "bro," the most despised designation on the planet these days. But don't listen to haters. Feminists and hipsters just criticize bros because they're jealous of their charisma, camaraderie, and humor.

When I hung with a band of bros my senior year in high school I was more despised than ever by the nerds, but more popular than ever with women. Being a "good-time Charlie," as the old school administrators used to call my crowd, has its advantages.

I don't think decent looking guys can ever be creepy. Girls will think of them as shy, troubled, mysterious, etc. They don't need to be textbook alpha males or have some picture-perfect approach/demeanor. Some guy who looks like Francisco Lachowski doing his first cold approach (assuming girls aren't already approaching him and he's like some guy who sits at home all day and plays video games) would get lots of sympathy. I can tell when I'm being rejected for my looks - girls will get this look of bewilderment/second-hand embarrassment on their face and try to avoid eye contact with me.

Yes, they can be, with their actions and words.

You could be getting rejected by your body language, your voice, the way you approach, what comes out of your mouth, the way you physically approach a girl.

You really need to work on your inner game first before you'll see any improvements.

I'll say this once again, review all the wealth of knowledge on here, reset your approaching by bettering yourself first, lifting, and reading here.

Post: #97

Hey man,

Firstly, you are very good looking. You look like you could be some sorta of pop star girls love like John Legend or Drake.

5,11 is a very good height as well. Get in shape and that is an imposing physique, although it might not even be neccesary just a decently fit body will attract girls. I am 5,6 and laugh when I hear people like you complain about height.

I grew up with some natural abilities with girls, but when I was in university from ages 20-24, I became scared of approaching girls, and got into smoking and selling rather than going out. As a result I did nothing with any girls in that prime of my life. It could be worse, at least your doing something.

Well done for actually going out and approaching girls! Most people read forever and never do anything.

HOWEVER

I think its fucking you in the head, and lowering your self esteem. Each approach is failing and causing you to think even less of yourself. I would actually give it up just for a couple weeks. Seriously.

If you can get yourself into a fun mood on a night out, and you see a girl, go for it. But right now, stop. You're screwing your confidence up further.

What you need to do, is READ. Read everything you can find and is reccomended here, read all of roosh's blog. Internalise red pill concepts. If you think 'objectifying' is a thing, then you're still blue pill and you need to snap out of it, and learn what's really going on.

the other thing you need to do is FIND SOMETHING YOU ARE GOOD AT AND GET BETTER AT IT. You got to develop some of your own self confidence, for me practising and developing my skills on piano and drums give me a lot of satisfaction in life. It is my main passion. Setting weightlifting goals, exercise goals, running speed goals, football achievements also make me feel good about myself every day.

I walk around knowing I'm constantly improving and most other people are stagnating. Make sure you're well dressed, get good clothes and that will make you feel confident all the time. People will pick up on your happiness and confidence, and girls will make eye contact with you.

Sort your diet out, you sound like someone who eats shit food and that isn't going to help your mood. You will feel a million times better, just cutting junk out of your diet.

Once you got this all sorted, then you will be thinking "yeah I'm awesome, just approach her man". You NEED to have that mindset.

Lastly, If your next post ignores all the advice given to you here and is just "I approached someone else today while walking around miserable for hours and it went badly, what am I doing wrong guys?? " You're not only going to stay unhappy, you're ungrateful, rude and stupid as well.

Post: #98

.....:..:

Post: #99

I'll try not to bitch and pout on here anymore. I really wanna be able to write out all my approaches on this site and get feedback.

Post: #100

Your biggest mistake is not doing any night-game! If I were 20 years old (actually I'd wait till 21 and just use the year before to read up on all things red pill) that'd be majority of my game. You've already done dozens of day-time approaches with 0 success so try to switch it up. Your approaches may work better on drunk girls or outside nightlife venues. I am not saying that you'll get number closes but at least some laughs and soft blowouts.

Here's an approach my buddy used yesterday in Washington, DC (generally a tough city for gaming with low quality) to get a good looking girls number. My buddy is much shorter than you (5-7"), old (38 years), and not a good looking guy but he had solid posture, good dress, and liquor fueled courage.

He saw two hot girls standing outside a bar engaged in deep conversation. As he was getting ready to approach them I even told him "don't bother they seem stuck up". Thankfully he did not listen to me and used one of the most corny openers out there but the delivery was key:
my buddy: "excuse me I'm not from around here, are you locals"
girls: "yes"
my buddy with a smirk on his face and hand gesturing at the girls dress: "can you tell me where the modeling agency is?"
both girls started laughing hard. After that my buddy asked for their names and just chatted about the neighborhood. He number closed shortly after and has a date set-up with one of them for next week.

here's a street approach I did yesterday which resulted in me getting two girls numbers:

me: "excuse me, do you like this place"? (I approach them outside a café in the evening)
girls: blah blah blah (one of them seems drunk so I change up my script a bit and immediately go for drinks angle)
me: (I am following my tried and perfected script and not even attuned to their responses) "there's a new bar that just opened up called Gryffon. I heard they have great cocktails. Let's go there!" (I smile and wave my hand in direction of the bar enthusiastically. See how I do not ask if they want to go, I command that we should go there)
girls: (discuss between themselves) "okay we'll follow you"

I am by no means a day-game expert, far from it, but give me a few red bull and vodka's, or well-timed beers and my approaches improve dramatically.

I still think that you need to start approaching girls more outside of bars, cafe's, clubs (I call this evening-game),and restaurants. Try approaching girls that seem to either be taking smoking breaks or trying to decide where to go. Of course being over 21 helps but even in your case trying for an insta-date at local coffee shop should be the goal. Also, as I mentioned earlier do not touch girls on your initial approach. I know some forum members swear by that but they must be running some other-world hyper game which many won't be able to pull off without being labeled as creepy.